Where Did Everyone Go?

Updated on August 31, 2015
M.C. asks from Louisville, KY
28 answers

I've been on his site for nearly 6 years now. It used to be that when I logged in, here were tons of new questions. Sometimes several pages in one day. Now, it seems like the board is dying... Heck, there are questions from the 24th on this page! (As I post on he 28th...)

Where did everyone go?

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Vacation!
I'm too busy having fun to write every day!
Opening day at MD Ren Faire tomorrow and I can hardly wait!

8 moms found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Atlanta on

I've been busy with life! School started on 10 August and life is crazy this year. Seems the older they get the more they do.

The trolls crack me up.

5 moms found this helpful
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K.V.

answers from Washington DC on

It looks like there are some positive changes happening recently here, with more to come. There is a new blog up which has some notes on what's happening with the site:

http://blog.mamapedia.com

It's been great for me so far. Personally I like asking all types of questions, and yes there are some positive answers and sometimes not great ones at well but always there is really great, immediate response which is the best part about being here.

5 moms found this helpful

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M.L.

answers from Cleveland on

I actually have more questions and more time now that my kids have started back to school.

I'll be honest though, I feel like I know people won't be very nice so alot of times i talk myself out of asking. People don't need to agree with me and they don't have to be lovey dovey all the time,but when they reply in a way that makes it seem like they didn't even read the question, it makes me think twice.

its a shame because I really value the opinions and experiences of people from different parts of the country.

16 moms found this helpful

J.S.

answers from St. Louis on

There used to be a lot more discussion disguised as a question. People actually got to know each other. Then along came the stupid questions, "I just had a baby last week and he keeps breathing every couple of seconds, is this normal?"

There is also the, "I do this to my kids and think it is great parenting, don't you agree?"

Then the wonderful questions that could easily be answered, "Here, let me google that for you."

Yawn

12 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

I think the troll questions really took a lot out of people. Then I think this turned into a number of people wanting to be first to call troll on a question even by legit people who just worded their first question awkwardly or so incompletely that it was impossible to really answer. So new people really looking for advice on a topic (who might have had a ton of good stuff to offer on future questions on other topics) were driven off by the animosity they encountered with their first experience. They'd write something in their SWH and then some of the regulars would launch into a new tirade about who's been here the longest and who's too new to have any standing, and it got sort of cliquey.

I think the administration was a real problem - spam questions (the movers in Mumbai or the essay-writing services) used to disappear almost immediately when reported, and reporting members got a "thank for you protecting Mamapedia" message. Yes, this was automatically generated and wasn't personal, but still I think it helped us feel valued. But when those bogus questions stayed up for days and days, I for one felt ignored by the administrators. Watching people respond sincerely to these spammers kind of made me think people were missing the real questions and wasting their time - maybe they got sick of it? I don't know.

I have no idea why I get a daily Mamapedia email with ONLY a blog post and not one of the old "today's questions" - I think those questions stimulated more newcomers to participate. Now I think just getting the one blog makes people think, "Oh I'm not interested in that one topic, so I'll go do something else, or I'll unsubscribe because there's nothing here for me."

I don't think the "summer vacation" reason has anything to do with the overall decline of this site over the past year or more. I used to feel there was much more diversity in questions and participants, which is what made it so valuable.

12 moms found this helpful
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H.W.

answers from Portland on

To be honest, M., some days this board (or the questions) makes me feel angry or frustrated for the children involved. It's a day-to-day drag when I see questions where the child has obviously been put on the back burner because of a parent's social life or because of strife between a woman and her ex/partner.

I can only read so much before I hit a limit. So, some days I just stay away and it's better for me. When someone is digging their heels in and staunchly determined to do things which are, in the long term, detrimental to their kid(s), nothing I can say is going to change that. With that said, I'm trying to focus more of my energy on helping people who *want* to be helped. Cynical? Maybe, but it works for me.

ETA: I should add, for balance, that there are many loving and caring parents on this site and I don't want to overlook that. I do like to see their ideas and suggestions, too.

10 moms found this helpful
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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

When people get attacked when they ask a question, it makes it easy to stop asking. It takes a certain sort of hardness to stick around this place.

There are no questions because there are very few new people. They get scared away.

I've haven't been checking or posting here much lately because I'm reading books and avoiding media most of the time. I have a project I'm working on.

9 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

yeah, the questions have slowed for sure. i think it's the dearth of actual parenting questions........the place has been trolled half to death.
or there's an amazing new forum somewhere that no one has alerted us to.
:) khairete
S.

9 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I do check in a couple times during the say to see if something interesting is posted. I'll admit that I get tired of trolls, essay writers, people asking all types of random questions and more. Sometimes I think whomever is in charge is allowing the site to be used to poll and research people.

I think it has been slow this week due to the start of school, some people still on vacation.

I told the moderator once that I would be willing to pay a nominal fee per month in order to keep the site freer of trolls and ads.

I've met many people on here through the years who I consider dear friends so I always check in because I want to catch up on how my friends are doing as well. Some of us have known each other since the Mamasource days!!

Have a great day!!

9 moms found this helpful
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T.R.

answers from Orlando on

I've been here since 2007 when my daughter was born, and I have seen the decline also. I agree with everyone on the troll issue as well. I chose to skip the drama, but it's a drag for sure. Also now when you post a question it asks you to look into the library to see if your question has been asked before, so i think that also keeps people from asking new questions. I know for myself I have been looking in the library too. A lot of people on here are always quick to express their annoyance in repeated questions, but let's face it, there's only so many parenting questions out there, everyone goes through a lot of the same things, just at different times, so the questions will be repeated, and if they aren't (like now), well then there are no new questions on the board! :)

8 moms found this helpful
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Z.B.

answers from Toledo on

I don't understand the "troll" issue at all. So what if someone posts a "question" about essay writing or a bored teen posts something! When I read those questions I roll my eyes and clck "back." It cost me a minute or two of my time. No biggy.

I guess what I really have trouble understanding is why people feel they only have two choices - either respond to every post or stay away from Mamapedia altogether.

Trolls don't bother me. I've never felt the need to respond to every legitimate post, much less the stupid ones.

6 moms found this helpful
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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

I'm still around I check in once or twice a day. Lots of trolls the past couple of years. I also notice the same questions asked over and over again. I understand when someone is hit with a crisis such as a cheating husband or a sick child, advice ill be asked for but it seems as though I have answered the same question many many times.

I keep hoping the old mamapedia comes back.

6 moms found this helpful

W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I've been on and off - I'm so sick of the trolls that I decided to back away and not feed them - at all - by NOT coming to the board.

I'm glad I am friends with many of facebook. There are some mom's on here that have become very special to me. So glad I met them through here!!

Any way - other than life, in general, trolls have kept me away. There's only one moderator. While I appreciate that she's ONLY ONE - things have changed and I don't like the change. I liked it when moderators would get trolls off in hours instead of days.

Oh well! Have a great day!!

5 moms found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

I loved looking at questions all the time even if they were repeated or similar to others. Trolls have been annoying, but on the side of amusing at times, so I'm not sure why that would stop anyone. They tell us to look up in our library and see some answers, and frankly half the time I can't find the question I want answered! Or even boring things like a recipe.
All right friends, lets all keep in touch again!

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Ebbs and flows, IMO. It's just before or just at the start of school for many people. I'm in the "let's double check everything for Monday" mode. Maybe that's all it is. One last beach trip, etc.

I ignore the trolls, or report them and move on. They don't affect if I come to MP or not.

What bothers me more are the ads and the ability to USE the site. I resisted add blockers because someone needs to be paid for this site, but when it became entirely unusable without it, I gave in and got the blocker. If other people have not done so, they may find they CAN'T post. The site locks up. If they rolled out new advertising that hosed the site, then that would be another reason why.

5 moms found this helpful
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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

Still here but this site is going downhill.

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H.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

LIlyM nailed it. I just think we are all a lot more social media/ forum savvy. There is no reason to invite toxicity into your life. Most people are helpful. Many more are at least tactful when they find fault with you. But since its the internet, people often just blurt things out in a hurtful way or assume the worst in you because they have nothing to go on but what you wrote. As a result, I think people don't waist their emotional energy asking questions on sites like this any more.

I have found that questions of a personal or sensitive nature are best brought up with friends and family. I love this site for its resources. I can't tell you how many great things have come from this site. But I've also waisted way too much time on it, spent too much emotion on people who don't even know me, and had creepy stalkers.

So yes, I stay away for months at a time.

4 moms found this helpful
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R.A.

answers from Houston on

I miss the days of many questions, too. It seemed like a real community of moms of every age and station in life. Also, lately I haven't been receiving my Mamapedia email in the morning. When that doesn't come I don't always think to get on the website to look at the questions. I miss the emails.

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J.F.

answers from Las Vegas on

Still here but have just been busy. I came on tonight because I'm procrastinating, just don't feel like doing what I should be doing and need a break.

We closed on our new house recently and are getting our current home ready to put on the market. We have construction going on in both places. Plus, with school and all of the activities starting up again, I feel pulled in a million different directions.

While this is the fewest number of daily posts I've seen in a long time, I do think things tend to cycle. As with any group, there are changes in the dynamics over time. I do agree with others that some of the rabid aggressiveness, hostility, and negativity can drive new people away.

I also believe that for people who've been here for a long time, the monotony of repetitive questions may also be a factor. This is not anyone's fault. New people should always feel free to ask whatever they want. It's just the reality of the situation for those who've been on for some time. There are just days when you don't want to type for the 300th time how you used the CIO method or potty-trained your toddler.

The technology is very annoying. There are many times when I've spent a good deal of time thinking about a response, typing it out, only to hit "post" and have it disappear. I used to try to recreate my lost responses. Now, I generally don't because I don't have that kind of time to waste.

I do miss the feeling of the community that used to be so strong here. There are women here I've "known" for several years and really enjoy their perspectives---even when they are vastly different from my own.

4 moms found this helpful
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G.D.

answers from Detroit on

I've only been around a few years, but got tired of glitches and trolls and stopped checking in often.

3 moms found this helpful
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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I think it's a busy time of the year with school starting back up. I don't know that I have as much time as I had last week.

After 1-1 1/2 months I'll have more time. I have a commitment and then it will be over. I'm sure others are just getting back in the swing of things.

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J.D.

answers from Dayton on

I’ve been here for a long time too & it does seem like lots of regulars have disappeared. I really miss the good ole days when there were even a few dads. I agree with those who think many of the newer posters have been scared away with “that’s a really strange first question” or with comments that have not been very tactful. It’s amazing the things people will say here that I don’t really think would be expressed to someone face-to-face.

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N.S.

answers from Denver on

I have notices that myself. Remember that right now we just had our kids start school or are getting ready to start and that doesn't leave everyone with a lot of time.

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H.G.

answers from Lancaster on

I've been a member for many years but I became bored with all the drama over the last six months or so. I just checked back in to see if anything has changed and I can see there's not much activity. I'm guessing other people have either grown tired of all the drama and just moved on too.

2 moms found this helpful
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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

The technology on this site is like something from 2005. Gets old after awhile. I've been hanging out elsewhere.

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M.E.

answers from Chicago on

For me, my child is getting older and I just don't seem to have as many questions or concerns as I did when she was younger. For specific issues, I usually find better conversations/advice on Facebook groups.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from New York on

I've been on here for years. Just don't have that much to say in recent months. I will say that August is always VERY quiet. Give it a few weeks and it should perk up a bit!

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