What Kind of Gift?

Start a tradition of taking her to do something special on her birthday. Special doesn't have to equate with expensive either. Just special. go to the zoo and see the animals in the winter, go to play, go out to lunch and try on jewelry. just something fun. That you can talk about for months in advance. "where do you want to have your special lunch this year?" get dressed up and take her out. give her a journal. make it a big deal. "your old enough now to have one of these" she can draw in it and you can write the captions for her. when she is older she can write herself. she will remember these outings long after she remembers the "IT" toy of the year.

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When our daughter turned three I made her a treasure chest. I bought a wooden box at a craft store and painted it her favorite colors. I painted some wooden letters for her name and some wooden hearts and stars and glued them onto the outside of the box. She loved it! It is the perfect place for her to keep all her little dolls and other special things that she doesn't want little brother to get. I think it is the only thing she got for her birthday that she still uses nearly every day. It is something that will grow with her too. You can find different styles and sizes of boxes. I think the whole thing cost me less than $30 to make. I had a lot of fun making it and plan to make one for our son too.

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Hallmark has some new recordable books. You record yourself reading it and then when she flips the pages she can hear you reading it. My Mom got my daughter one for her b-day and she loves it.
I like the idea of a special day out that Sherry suggested

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Does she like dressing up? You could get her a cedar chest or some other kind of chest that she can keep forever, and fill it with dress up clothes. Fun times!

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I got my daughter this wonderful book of fabric paper dolls from Etsy: http://www.etsy.com/listing/65875840/fabric-paper-dolls-t... I highly recommend it! It's beautiful and lasting and she can take it anywhere.

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You could always start a charm bracelet (james avery has beautiful pieces and high quality. They're only in Texas I think, but I'm sure they will ship you jewelry).

I say go to the local kiddie park or zoo or something like that.

Does she like to go outside? Maybe bubbles and a new ball and some sort of car/tricycle to ride. Maybe a new swing or playground.

Is she more in-doorsy? Dress up idea is nice. Also arts & crafts type of gift would be okay too perhaps. Art easel with smock. Colored paper, paints, pompoms, pipe-cleaners, sequins, glue.....

Does she like to help you cook? Kid's cookbook and/or her own measuring cups and spoons. Martha stewart makes some cute ones for kids for sale at Macys.

Laptop computer with games (my son likes his Buzz Lightyear one he got for Xmas. He's 2.5 and can do half the games. The other half are a bit more advanced for him still).

I'm with Kate on the dress up clothes! My daughter is 3 and loves them!! Pirate outfits, princesses, fairy wings, Iron man mask, wands, necklaces, etc.
My MIL gets my girls the growing with grace porcelean dolls every year that are precious moments that say their age. So cute! I love them!

You could get her a Just like Me American Girl doll and then get matching outfits for her and her doll.

How about a kitchen set? I got my daughter a Fisher Price one years ago when she was 3 and she played with it non stop. Lots of pretend cooking etc. Of course back then you could find more little cooking things than you can now. My daughter just bought a little kitchen set for my grandson and he just turned 2 and he loves it. He likes opening and shutting oven door, microwave door, cupboards etc and loves putting the little dishes in and out. He has just now started to pretend to cook and pretend to eat. I still have the set we got my daughter so will have to dig it out and set it up for the grandson so he can have something at grandma's house to play with too.

you could get a personalized book. "i see me" has great ones geared towards little girls. there are other types that put in pictures of the kids and they always look so cute:) i'm sure she'll love whatever she gets.

You could make her a personalized ABC book with pictures of family, friends and other favorite things representing the letters. I did this for both of my kids when they turned three--the first was a handmade scrapbook and the second was a photo book on Shutterfly, they even have a special template for ABCs. Fun for you to do, fun for them to look at and learning their letters too :-)