What Do U Wish Someone Told U When U Were Pregnant?

A couple of practical things I would have liked to know:

A daily diet of blueberries (fresh or frozen), no more than 1 cup, will help with any constipation and manage regularity so as to prevent hemorrhoids.

Also, I wish someone had warned me about the hormone dump that happens after you have a baby, and how you can feel terribly cold a few minutes after the baby is born. I certainly wasn't expecting that!

Lastly, I'd just listen a lot (I remember being pregnant and not really wanting to hear any horror stories AND thinking I wanted to do everything 'my' way), and only offer advice when asked. I remember my stepmother saying "pregnant women often get really self-absorbed"-- I didn't like hearing it, but it was true!

I was laying in bed last night thinking about how different it is to be a mom for the third time. Labor was a joke this time. The pregnancy was a joke --I took naps, spent close to a hundred bucks on special support hose to prevent swelling, prevented bad hemorrhoids, etc. We shall see how I feel at the 6 week exhaustion mark, but right now, I so get why people just keep on having kids. My second was so much easier than my first, and I have no doubt raising this third will be even easier. I actually I feel sorry for my friends that are parents of "onlys" because of how hard or colicky or whatever. It only gets easier and better, and I am so thankful for getting to experience this amazing blessing one more time. Having babies is truly amazing.

Being a first time parent is the hardest thing i have ever done, even harder than completing a ph.d. program from hell. No one tells you how damn hard breastfeeding is, or how hard it is to negotiate parenting styles with a spouse --to say nothing of having to learn how to keep ones mouth shut when hubby tries to do your usual chores and does them very poorly, with a disgruntled look on his face.

There are no words or advice you can give someone. My youngest BIL put it best, "it's the most amazing thing in the world, and you just won't get it until you are a parent."

Everyone talked about what to expect during the pregnancy and delivery. I learned how to diaper and bathe and do infant cpr. But when we brought the baby home on the first night and she started crying incessantly, I had no clue what to do! No one talked about how to parent a newborn. I felt there should have been more focus on that.

Do what you feel is best for you and your child. Do your own reseach and make up your own mind about what you feel will work for you and your family. Whether it be breastfeeding, drugs during delivery, vaccines, cosleeping or even something simple like swaddling. Don't follow the pack if it doesn't work for you. I wish someone had said that to me. And be prepared for the lack of sleep. I think that's what shocked me the most.

1. There are 100,000 books on childrearing, but not one baby comes with a real owner's manual. If there were only 1 way to raise a child, none of those authors would have gotten a publishing deal. So you have to figure it out on your own. You will make mistakes. That does not make you a failure.

2. As soon as you get something figured out, the baby changes schedules, preferences, or patterns. You do not need all the equipment the marketplace tells you that you do, and you do not need to purchase a million of the latest toys that the kids saw on the commercials. You do not need to give expensive birthday parties just to keep up with the neighbors. That does not make you a failure.

3. That's a hospital johnny, not a cape with a big "S" on it. You cannot do this alone. Yes, women have done childcare for thousands of years without all the car seats and accessories and toys you have. But they also had a community of women (family, friends) who helped out. It takes a village, so build/find one for yourself. That does not make you a failure.

4. Fathers can and should do more than you think they can. That does not make you a failure.

5. You will be exhausted. After that, you will be more exhausted. That does not make you a failure.

6. There are times when you will not want to be with your child and you will need a break. You should admit it, and you should take a break. That does not make you a failure.

7. There are times when you will feel like a failure. That does not make you a failure.

8. It's worth it. One day that child will make you a picture or say "I love you" or bring you a frog or go on the school bus by him/herself or graduate from college, or do any of a million other things that make you smile. Those are the moments that will tell you that you are definitely not a failure.

I wish someone would have told me how difficult breastfeeding was going to be. Under no circumstances give the baby a bottle before 3 weeks. I made that mistake with my first and he only wanted a bottle and I spent double time pumping and then giving him a bottle. I was hallucinating by 3 weeks from lack of sleep. lol

I know other people may not agree with me on this one, but let the nurses take care of the baby at night while you are in the hospital, unless your husband stays with you. Unfortunately my husband could not stay with me. This was the only time that I had someone help me out at night so I could get a little bit of rest. The nurses brought me my babies when they were ready to nurse.

Take a picture of your belly every week AND ENJOY your pregnancy!
I loved being pregnant and I am kind of sad that I didn't "celebrate" it more by making memories like belly pics, cast and such. At the time I didn't want to waste the money, but in retrospect I wish I had spoiled myself a bit more.

I hated being pregnant and feared labor like you wouldn't believe (that being said, I have to kids and still have never been in labor because of an emergency c-section with the first and a breech baby with the second)! I read "What to Expect When You're Expecting" and "The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy," and that was really all I needed.

What I really needed was lots of stories about the first 3 months!!! I was about 7 months pregnant before I learned that babies need to eat every 3 hours. Not sure why I didn't know that before, but that was a complete shock to me!

I guess I really needed to know that babies do need to eat often, babies like to be held (ALL THE TIME), it's ok if you don't have time to do much housework during the first couple of months, it's ok if you spend most of the first couple of months sitting on the couch nursing the baby because that's what many, many moms do.

The best place for baby to sleep is wherever baby will sleep - the bouncy seat, the carseat, the swing, next to you in bed.

It really is ok to follow your instinct and to just learn how to sleep on your back with the baby on top of you if that's the only way you get any sleep!

I was the same way as your friend when pregnant. There were many layoffs at my jobs at the time so I hid it until five months! I wish I had embraced it more and shown it off because it was and will be my only pregnancy.