Hi!
My son who is 4 years old seems to have a this fear of going potty on a public toilet or even his grandmother's toilet. Now he has gone pee on a public toilet, but it takes some patience, and encouraging words. A month ago we went to Reno and he would say he had to go poop, well we would try to get him on the toilet, but no luck. We were drving home and he said I want to go poop at my house. He held his poop for at least 2 to 3 days. When we got home he went on the toilet and said he had to do five poops..LOL that made me laugh since he held it so long. Just 2 weeks ago we went up to see my mother up in Redding. My son did not want anything to do with the public toilet at the park, so I thought going to a gas station or resturant he would be better. Nothing worked. I know how bad he had to go he kept holding his butt. He even kept saying he wanted to go and this kid was at his birthday party at a fun park. I said then lets go outside behind a tree. He started to, but thought there were bugs or snakes in the grass. When we got to my mom's he still had a problem going on her toilet he kept holding his butt. Well I just swooped him up and I gave him some encouraging words and put him on the toilet and he just let it all flow. That evening we went to my aunts we went swimming after we got out and I notice my son looked like he had the poop face going. Instead of asking for the potty he just did a few poops in his pants. I grabbed him and put him on the toilet then he went more. We are planning a long trip coming up and I have my concerns since my mother-in-law has rust in the water from a well. So the toilet will look all dirty to him. I don't want him to hold it for so long. We were at a BBQ at my sister-in-laws house in Georgetown a few family members were sitting down relaxing and I looked over and my son was pulling his pants down and going pee. You should have seen the looks on some of my family members. I didn't get all worked up about it, I just said to my son if you need to go potty there is a toilet in the house. My husband went over to him and talked to him. It turned out my son was going to go poop too. My husband put his foot down on that. Well we got home and my son did his thing on the toilet. Does anyone have any suggestions or has this happen to you? Thank you!!
Hi Everyone! Thank you for all your great advice and suggestions. We just got back from our trip. Our first stop we were playing at a park and my son was doing the pee pee dance. My husband took him to the potty and there was success. I was pleasantly surprised. I asked my husband how he did it? He said I told our son to just concentrate on me. The trip was an 12 hours..a very long ride for our kids, but they did great. When we got to our destination our son had to go potty. I have to say I had my doubts, but my hubby put him on the toilet and every thing came out okay..LOL Since then he kept going on the potty with no trouble. The only thing he did want was help and that meant mama sitting in the bathroom and talking to him. There were a few times he went on his own. Let me say I was a proud mother. We had a great trip with no toilet fears! YAHOO!!
Babies R Us other stores have kid soft toilet seats. They cost between $11-15.00. Maybe the two of you can go on a shopping trip and allow him to pick one out. Let him know that it is his potty seat and nobody else can use it. You could then let him take it wherever you go, because they have a universal fit so it will fit just about any where. I hope this suggestion is helpful.
my older son who is almost 11 years old now , had similer problem .
he would never ever use public bathroom no matter what. he would call me from school to come and get him home so he could use the bathroom .
no matter what we do he would never use public bathroom until he was in 2nd grade that when i told him if you do not use the bathroom at the school you will end up going to the hospital and they will stick big needle in your private area to get the urine out .
so he started using the public bathroom for Number 1 only until now no matter what he would never use the public bathroom for number 2 .
when we go to anyone house he cleans the seat very well before he sets and some times even after cleaning the seat he puts some tissues on top of the seat and use the bathroom .
try putting tissues in the top of the seat and see if he is willing to use it .
Good luck with him .
Wow. It sounds like an OCD problem that adults have. I'd do what you did, and force him to sit on the toilet, any toilet. But maybe you can start a reward program for him so he associate good things with going to the bathroom no matter what bathroom.
Oh my, Hello N., I have a 4 year old boy who has gone thru some interesting phases. I feel for you, but I think he is learning about himself in this big world. My son has had some moments like that, but not to that extreme. They are still experiencing firsts... so these are all new experiences. I have also found that anything I have overreacted about, even once, he will pick up and run with. So, I am afraid of bugs for example, well my 4 yr old will shriek like me when he sees bugs. Then when he sees Daddy pick it up, he wants to as well. Another thing we do for everything that plagues me with the 4 yr old, is the sticker sheet. He earns and looses stickers for things. Might not be good to penalize him for the misses, but the hits in the toilet are worth stickers. Good luck to you and I hope this passes for you (him) soon, A.
There is a great guy in El Dorado Hills that deals with fears and phobias and is great with kids. He totaly got rid of my daughter's fear of transitions. She would have a total breakdown anytime we did something unexpected or had to change plans, even stop for gas. The place is called the Neuro-Linguistic Learning Center in EL Dorado Hills and his name is Gerry Hughes. You can probably look it up on the web or I can hunt around and find their number for you. It wasn't expensive and it was well worth it for our family. GOod luck!
Hi N.,
I am sorry that you have having this challenge with your son. You mentioned that you are concerned about the long trip you have planned. You may want to look at purchasing a travel potty or the inflate-a-potty. www.OneStepAhead.com has some travel options that may make the situation less stressful. Also, this way you won't have to worry about the well water. Good luck.
