Any Ideas to Get My 3-Yr-old to Poop on Potty?

We used to have the same issue, every nap time my then 2 1/2 year olds would poop in their pull-up right after we laid them down to nap - and they were potty trained except for when sleeping. There's hope, they eventually stopped doing it and we haven't had a poopy pull-up in a long time.

Re: going in the potty. When my girls started to become potty trained, we bought the Kandoo or Huggies Clean Team Flushable Wipes and my girls were attracted to the colorful packageing so we decided to call them "poopy wipes" and only allowed them to use them if they pooped on the potty. This worked well and we're almost a year into being potty trained and they still use the poopy wipes. Just too bad that that's how we refer to them... even in public "hey, we need poopy wipes at the store". Oh well, only parents would understand :-).

Also - if he's off of the potty seat and on the big toilet, you could purchase at Walmart/Target/KMart the little potty seat that sits on the big toilet seat so that he is more comfortable.

If you are trying to get him to go on a regular toilet you might go back to using a separate potty chair. the feeling of being up on the big toilet might be scary for him. Also, I used hershey kisses for poops.

Just some questions about the physical aspect. Do his feet touch something when sits? Hard to go if they don't. The seat we use has steps built into it and handles on the sides. He likes this one best, compared to the one where I have to lift him on, even though it has handles.

Also, my son goes from wanting company to wanting privacy. He also has books he keeps in bathroom just for sitting on the potty. I also don't let him flush unless he poops. If I have to change the diaper, I "get" to flush.

My pediatrician says that they will do it when they're ready. Trying to force the issue will just cause a lot of tears and frustration, and in my experience, it was for me as much as for him.

Right now, with winter and the layers of clothes, we are having a potty pause. But, I am optimistic that once it warms up we will be able to master this over the summer.
Good luck!

If he likes books and likes to know how things work, this book might help him: "It Hurts When I Poop". We bought it because our little boy was having constipation problems, didn't want to poop on the potty OR in a diaper (there was a point we would have taken poop anywhere!!) Anyway this book has great illustrations and describes in a way they understand that the food they eat goes through the body, it shows the food go in the mouth, you follow it down the throat, into the intestines, you see it turn into poop, then follow it to the potty. It's not graphic or anything! Probably a week after we started reading this he was telling me every time he got on the potty how his body made poop, and wether it had made any that was ready to come out or not!

Anyway, I know your problem is a little different, but sometimes I think they just want to know what their body is doing.

Good luck!!

My daughter was the same way. She is 5 and she wears night diapers because she still does both overnight. I made a chart for her that she places animal on when she goes during the day. I am working to get her not to do it at night. It does take time for kids to get comfortable pooping on the potty.

I sell Usborne Books and we have a Kane-Miller line . One of our books is about (How Everyone Poops).This might help getting started. We also have a book about Potty Time in our baby/toddler section.

Here is my website. www.ubah.com/T2267

Good Luck,
J. R.

I have 3 1/2 year old twins and am going through somewhat the same situation. We had them going for a week on the potty wearing the favorite underwear they picked out. Then they stopped. Now it is when they feel like it. My pediatrician told me the same thing about not forcing it and they will go when they want to. They flat out tell me they don't want to do it. We use M&M's for reward. Three if they pee and seven if they poop. I know it is stressful, but if you force it they will never go and it could cause problems down the road emotionally for him. Just relax and know that when he is ready he will go. Try getting videos and books that talk about potty training and let him watch you and your husband go to the bathroom. The other thing we do, is try to take their mind off what they are doing. My husband tells them to just relax and then gives them a magazine with toys in it or a favorite book to look at while they sit on the potty and that tends to help as well. I hope it works out for you.

Have him watch while you make a great big show of transfering the poo to the toilet and then flushing it down with gusto, waving bye bye to it. Also, don't act upset or disappointed when you check his diaper and see that he's gone; instead, act excited (especially if he tells you he went) and excited about the opportunity to flush it bye-bye! Hopefully this will help him get over his fears, and make him want to do it himself.

Good luck!

I left my son naked and let him watch an Elmo video until he pooped. He doesn't get to watch TV normally, so it was a big incentive. If he got up, Elmo got turned off.

I'm pretty sure age isn't your issue!! My son is 2 1/2 and pee's on the potty 99% of the time and stays dry during naps and bed BUT he still poops in his pants!! It's crazy. I have also tried candy and books and whatever. It's very frustrating but it will happen when it happens. I just try to catch him in the act and toss him on the potty! No one's more excited then him when he goes! He told me it was harder to poop then pee!! I gotta give him that! ha My son sits on the big potty and I agree with the other mom, they need a stool or something under their feet!!

Hi A.,
I had the same exact situation with my then 3 year old. He was great with peeing, but would not poop. Didn't want to, was scared, etc. I also tried candy, trip to Toys R Us. He just didn't want to. My ped. said not to force the issue, it won't work, and he was right. He also said 3 1/2 is average age for boys. So we backed off, he would ask for a pull up to poop in and I would let him. Finally one day he just said "I want to poop in the potty" and he did and we never looked back! I think they have to do it on their own terms and when they feel they are ready. Good luck!

I had the exact same problem when mine was 3. I wouldn't give her a diaper to poop in, and she held it in for 4 days! I talked to a nurse who said this wasn't healthy for her and could result in a trip to the emergency room. She said fear of poop at this age is normal and to just let her poop in a diaper. The rest of the time she wore underwear and would ask for a diaper when she needed to poop. I took the pressure off, watched videos with her like Elmo and Bear in the Big Blue House about going potty, asked her once in awhile if she wanted to try to poop in the potty, and reassured her that some day she would be able to do it. Eventually she decided on her own that she wanted to try it, and when she did, I made a big deal about how great it was but gave her no rewards. Once she was ready, it was very easy and stress free. Don't let other people make you think there is something wrong with your child or that you aren't doing your job. Just be patient, and it will happen! (There is a time for every purpose under Heaven...)

Hello mom,
I had dealt with this until my son was 6 yrs old. No matter what I did he refused to use a potty chair, or a toilet or anything. One day while at a yard sale I came acrossed a home made camping style toilet. It was inclosed with a lid, inside of a wooden box with a lid on it. I never emptied that toilet for a long time and I'm telling you I thought I was going to die over that stink. I didn't say anything. We kept it in a corner in HIS room. And when he saw that he could "check this out on HIS terms" it became less frightening. And that broke him. I was so happy I cried!

Same thing with my older son. Only pooped in his underwear for almost 6 months. I took him to the store and let him get the toy. I then duct taped it to the top of the toilet. Once he knew the toy was in the house he at least tried. I am also lucky enough that he loves prunes. Once we had the toy I let him have three prunes a day for a while so that he would go. Good luck to you-I know it is hard to keep cleaning up the yuck, but "this too shall pass".

The best success we had was with the mode of "Anything you want to do, potty first!" If they want to change activities, get something to drink, whatever - "potty first". Or you could make it the "poop first" rule. (You want a drink? Poop first!)

The other thing that's worked well for us was setting the timer - and the amount of time depends on the age of the child. For a 3 year old, you might start with 30 minutes, and if that's too often, then try on the hour. When the buzzer goes off - time to go potty. Let him know that if he goes potty like he's supposed to (#1 AND #2 - like a "big boy"), then you won't have to use the timer. Our oldest would start saying, "I know, I know...time to go potty..." Then the next day we'd ask, "Do we need to set the timer today?" "Noooo...."

For what it's worth, and good luck!

Keep working at it. Try to catch him in the act and set him straight away on the potty, if you can get him to drop it in the pot, you can say "see, it didn't hurt a bit".

I have read some of the other responses and why some of these moms treat potty training as a sensitive issue, I don't know. Why should this be any different than making your child do anything else? Your the boss. He needs to respect that and mind, same as picking up his toys, taking a bath, etc. Not to say you shouldn't use patience and kindness in dealing with him, but be firm.

Have you read the book EVERYBODY POOPS to him? I used to work in a children's bookstore and we had ALOT of requests for that book. In addition, we had quite a bit of feedback from people who said it really helped.

Does he have an older sibling who might be willing to show him "it's okay" to poop in the potty? I know my niece would NOT go when my sister took her. Her older sister, tw years older, literally took her by the hand and showed her that she pooped in the potty and after that.....she wanted her sis to go with her when she went and there were no more problems.

Sometimes I think it is a fear thing. Realizing that it is normal and that everyone does it does make a difference. It's reassuring to know that it is normal for everyone, pets, parents, etc.

I have had the same problem with my four year old. I would say that you need to check his diet, does he have a well rounded diet? Also is the poop rock hard? These are some factors that can lead him to waiting. I used fruit and veggie supplements as well as benefiber powder. It softened the stool so that it was easier to get out.