28 answers

The Truth About Tooth Fairy

My 6 yr old son just lost his 1st tooth yesterday. He was beaming with excitement! He went ahead and initiated the conversation about the tooth fairy... I went ahead and went along with it and left $10 under his pillow. He was so excited, he couldnt believe it. So of course, a million questions came after that..is she real? how did she do it? I didnt want to break the news to him that the whole thing was not true, but I know that when he gets to school on Monday..his classmates will eventually tell him and even tease him about it? My son is the eldest so he hasnt heard it from other siblings or cousins. Just looking for some advice on what I should tell him. I dont want him to come home from school thinking his mom lied to him. Agghh!

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So What Happened?™

Wow---I should've explained myself about the $10 for the tooth. That came from donations from grandmas, grandpas, and aunts. (He's the first grandchild, nephew, etc.. to lose a tooth) Anyway, I thought that was nice of them, but I did explain to him today that he would only get that much this time because it was his first tooth. But the sweetest thing was that when I told him how surprised I was that she left 10 dollars, he said, "Dont worry, mom, I'll share it with you." Too sweet! I plan to give him 2 dollars in quarters here on out, so that we can practice our counting the next morning! THanks for all the responses!

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$10??????? Seriously...for a tooth? I agree with the other advice you were given...must believe for the money but $10 IS excessive...think of the message you are communicating. This is a fairy tale and a fun one, not a necessity in life.

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Holy Cow, $10 for a tooth?! The most I've ever given is $5 and that was for a silver tooth. At any rate, I suspect you have some time before the other kids break the news to him. Most other 6 year old are just starting to lose their baby teeth, in fact my son was almost 8 when he lost his first tooth... so I think most partents still use the "Tooth Fairy" thing. I don't think of it as lying so much as letting them be kids and have the whole fantasy/imagination experience that was so great when we were kids. Hope that helps ;)

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With every thing- just have fun. I wouldn't make it point to answer yes and no questions. Keep it a mystery- not telling a lie but, not telling the truth. Example- Is the tooth fairy real? Answer: I don't know what do you think? If the answer is yes- You maybe right. If it is no- why would you you think that? This is a lot more fun... and it builds comunication skills, relationship skills, a thinking process, an imagination, and problem solveing skills.

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Ten Dollars from the tooth fairy!! Whoa!!! I would believe in the tooth fairy too!!! lol That reminds me of the one of the first times that the tooth fairy visited our house...about 30 years ago...I snuck in and left what I THOUGHT was a $1.00 bill under her pillow...in the morning...out she comes with a TEN dollar bill in her hand!! I had to think fast...we were living on a very tight budget and couldnt afford that $10. I told her "Honey, you know, I bet the tooth fairy didnt have change...and I bet that there are other little boys and girls in town that didnt get anything for THEIR teeth because she had to leave it all here. You leave that under your pillow when you go to school and I bet she will sneak back in and make change"....it worked!!! heheheheh
I dont think there is anything wrong with allowing a child to experience the fun of the tooth fairy, Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny. You can tell him that The Tooth Fairy is a way for you to celebrate him growing up and loosing his baby teeth. We never really had an issue with the tooth fairy but I don know that we explained to the children that Santa Claus was "The Spirit of Christmas and Giving"...they always knew the REAL reason for Christmas!!

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With every thing- just have fun. I wouldn't make it point to answer yes and no questions. Keep it a mystery- not telling a lie but, not telling the truth. Example- Is the tooth fairy real? Answer: I don't know what do you think? If the answer is yes- You maybe right. If it is no- why would you you think that? This is a lot more fun... and it builds comunication skills, relationship skills, a thinking process, an imagination, and problem solveing skills.

2 moms found this helpful

Holy Cow, $10 for a tooth?! The most I've ever given is $5 and that was for a silver tooth. At any rate, I suspect you have some time before the other kids break the news to him. Most other 6 year old are just starting to lose their baby teeth, in fact my son was almost 8 when he lost his first tooth... so I think most partents still use the "Tooth Fairy" thing. I don't think of it as lying so much as letting them be kids and have the whole fantasy/imagination experience that was so great when we were kids. Hope that helps ;)

2 moms found this helpful

$10??????? Seriously...for a tooth? I agree with the other advice you were given...must believe for the money but $10 IS excessive...think of the message you are communicating. This is a fairy tale and a fun one, not a necessity in life.

2 moms found this helpful

What the kids will really be talking about is the $10. That is more than most kids get for a tooth (going rate in my area is $1). Our standard response to the Tooth Fairy, Santa Clause, etc. is that you have to believe to get money/presents/etc. So even if the kids in his class tell him the Tooth Fairy isn't real, you can let him decide whether to believe or not for the next lost tooth. For $10, I bet he will "believe" no matter what others tell him.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

I always told my kids that the only way the tooth fairy or Santa would keep coming was if they believed, then I would tell them that I still believe (I do, I think all kids need to believe in magic, so I believe there is a tooth fairy or Santa in every child's life even if it's me!). They would play along and now they are in their 20's with their own children and they are saying the same thing to their kids.
We all knew that it probably wasn't true, but we liked having that magic in our lives. I don't think the kids at school will say anything, most of them probably still have the tooth fairy, but the $10 will probably be the biggest topic.

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First, $10 sounds really like way too much. Secondly, I have four kids, all believed in the Tooth Fairy, none of them traumatized or teased at school. Its just fun. They all have such great imaginations at that age and its just encouraging it. Most kids at 6 believe in the Tooth Fairy. You are not a bad mom for lying. Its just playing up with their great 6 year old imaginations. No one at school is going to correct him. They are all cute 6 year olds too! Lighten up and let them be 6 year olds! Kind of like when they draw a picture and want to show us the picture of the great "rabbit driving a spaceship." Or something like that. We want to encourage it, not say, "Well, actually rabbits don't drive and spaceships aren't real." Embrace the age and the wonderful imaginations!

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Of course he can believe in the tooth fairy! Phooey on everyone else. It's alot like Santa. You have to "believe"! I tell my boys that the tooth fairy sneaks in and puts it under the pillow (but wow, $10? Honey, you better be ready when they start losing more teeth!! I give my kids a dollar!!!) I try not to get too much into details so they can have an imagination. I just recall my own memories of it, ie, that I never SAW the tooth fairy, myself either, but imagined she glowed and snuck in the window. Tell him that no one really knows how they get in, but I tell my boys that the animals, birds and squirrels out in our yard are great messengers to people like Santa and the tooth fairy, and they keep them informed!

Enjoy this special time!!

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Wow! $10? I used to get like a dollar, and thought with inflation like 3 would be fine when my daughter loses her teeth....i guess maybe not!

If it is his first tooth, why would he already be "done" with the tooth fairy? I know I believed until close to when I lost my last tooth in 3rd grade.....I wouldn't worry about it too much. Not muxh you can do about what friends tell him anyways.

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Hi J. - I think that you have a while. I don't think that the kids are going to break the news to him just yet. I think the most six year olds still believe in the tooth fairy. My daughter is seven and has lost several different teeth, and she shill believes.

1 mom found this helpful

$10???!!!!!!!!!!!!! For one tooth??????? Let me pull out some of my teeth!!!
Wow, I must be getting old.
I allow my children to use their imagination, if my 7 year old asks me I will just ask her what does she believe? I'm not sure if her older siblings/cousins haven't already told her. But you better believe when she loses a tooth she is putting it under her pillow and expecting something.
(She recently had to have a tooth pulled and she was so traumatized, so she said she was expecting the tooth fairy to leave her $3, not the usual $1. But because I was just as traumatized she was left $5, and that was so exciting!
Same for Santa, I'm not sure if she knows, but I'm not going to ruin it for her. She will probably come to me herself and tell me she knows, and it will be our little secret. :-) Just follow your gut.

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My daughter,8, still believes. Last time, she even wrote a list of 11 questions for the tooth fairy. I typed up a note with my explanations. Now, she says she can't wait to loose another tooth because she has more questions. She loved the money, but I think she liked the letter even more. She has never been teased about it at school. All of her friends still believe and still like getting money. I am sure as with Santa and the Easter Bunny, the truth will come out later, but for now, she still believes. When the truth comes out, I will explain the tradition of why parents want to create memories for their kids and how they want to make them happy. Hopefully, this helps.

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Well hopefully at this age he won't find out yet, but PLEASE don't tell my kids he got $10.00! :) Our tooth fairy is much cheaper. My oldest two are 9 and 8 and they still haven't asked, which is fine by me. They might know and just don't want to lose the free money.:) When they asked questions about her and who she was, I just told them they are fairies. When they wanted to know what Fairies need teeth for, I told them that they grind them up to make fairy dust so they can fly. By the way, they can only take and use clean teeth! :)

My son just lost his first tooth also. When he started talking about the tooth fairy I told him that there really wasn't a tooth fairy (we don't do Santa either)but if he wanted to pretend that there was a tooth fairy he could. I left money under his pillow, he doesn't know it was me but he knows it wasn't the tooth fairy. He was excited all the same. At this age, children are very forgiving so when you tell him the truth he may be upset for a little while but he will get over it quickly. He might not even get upset. As far as what to tell him, maybe teach him where the idea of the tooth fairy came from and why people think it is fun to say there is a tooth fairy. Hopefully that will help him not be upset if he understands you weren't trying to lie to him but make the loss of his first tooth fun.

First off $10 is REALLY expensive! He will expect $10 for every tooth and that can get pricey! I have a 14 year old boy myself who has lost all of his teeth and he never got teased or told the truth! The tooth fairy is a part of childhood in my opinion and wouldn't dream of not playing the tooth fairy card with my younger two kids. They think it is magicial and really special. Most other kids are told the same thing and those who aren't really don't break the news to the ones who believe. It is like Santa Claus. My son believed in Santa until he was like 10. I'm not sure of your beliefs but the tooth fairy is and (in my opinion) a part of childhood. Just remember childhood only lasts a very short time and if the other kids at school tell him the tooth fairy isn't real then just explain it is fun and not meant to hurt him but to make him smile. Good luck and you may think about lowering the amount given next time, just a thought. Hope this helps!

-M.

Good Morning J., I read one Mama on here awhile back that posted about Santa Claus and her Grandmother. It was wonderful response. The gr Momma asked What do you Believe?
Then went on to say the important thing is what we believe.

One thing though I think the Tooth fairy went a little over board with 10 bucks...lol Pouting I only got a Quarter......lol Funny though so did our kids, most they ever got was 50 cents. Our 2 oldest gr kids are getting 5 bucks. Way to much in my mind. But maybe Paper is easier for tooth fairies to carry in the Treasure bags.

Tia ( 9 ) our eldest gr child told me awhile back she knew the TF wasn't real cause she saw daddy leaving her room. But she wasn't gonna tell cause it was fun to pretend. I agreed with her and told her it would be our secret and let the others have fun too.

Good Luck to you and your little man
K. Nana of 5

I have a 7 year old girl and she still believes in the Tooth Fairy and she's not been told otherwise at school.

Let him believe & be a child as long as you can it my motto. They're only little for a little while & you can never get that innocence back.

I didn't have any issue as a child when I found out the truth about the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus and Easter Bunny. He'll be fine :)

On the $10.00 I see all the other comments... do what you want there but he'll expect it every time which could get costly :) I made the 1st tooth more but the going rate from what I hear nowdays is $1.00. Or you can do other things that I've heard like leaving a special coin like a silver dollar or one of the other $1.00 golden coins I forget what they're called....

L.

wow 10.00 for a tooth! the kids will be wondering why their tooth fairy only left them 2.00 or less. I usually give my kids 1.00 and never told them the tooth fairy story or that she was real and never got the Santa or Easter bunny started either. They get gifts and a basket for easter but know they are from us. I just never got it started and never had to lie to my kids about the stories. They learned the stories from friends at school and figured it out on their own that they aren't real and weren't devastated when they knew the truth.
We do enjoy watching movies about Santa and read books about these things but they are portrayed nothing more than a fairy tale just like Cinderella or any other fairy tale story.

My nieces are too young to worry about the tooth fairy but I remember when I was a kid that I my grandparents gave me a special little tooth-shaped box for the fairy to find my teeth in that I still have in my keepsake-trunk. My mom let me believe as long as I wanted (almost all of my teeth were out @ this point b/c I lost most of them with in 1 1/2 yrs) She would give me somewhat vague answers about how the fete was accomplished which I accepted (the only time I ever asked was when I lost one while sick with the flu, gross I know, mom kept tooth fairy gifts on hand just in case & I happened to get one between trips to the bathroom) I remember the day I found out she wasn't real I was waiting for the music bus one morning (I played cello in the Instrumental Music Program run by my school) & i had lost a tooth the night before & w/o a thought my mom blurted out "I don't think I have any tooth fairy gifts for you right now but I can go shopping while you're @ school." I was devistated my mom felt horrible b/c she told me that she had just assumed that some kid @ school had already told me but I bet I was one of the first kids in my third grade class that knew the truth. The point is that you can't control what the idiot kids @ school tell your kid. If you want them to believe in something fanciful or beautiful if he wants that has nothing to do with actual reality he'll probably be the better for it having more creativity and a broader mind than most of the other kids which will be to his advantage later. If you have a good relationship with your child, it won't matter what he is told @ school he will trust your word before that of lil Billy any day of the week. When I had doubts about things of this nature & would ask if it was real or not my mom would say something along the lines of 'do YOU believe it's real?' if I answered yes she would say "then it is" meaning if you can believe it's there then there is the possibility that it really is there. I believe that parents tend to over think situations concerning what could be going through their kids head when kids tend to be more likely to be thinking about the guy who just slipped on the banana peel on t.v. rather than the meaning of life. Just let him be a kid & keep dreaming about the 'stuff of fairytales' rather than hitting him with the grim reality that is life. I will stop rambling now and hope that I have helped you out a little bit, good luck.
p.s. I got a Bart Simpson doll for the tooth I lost when I had the flu LOL. ( I usually got small toys or music tapes [I am a child of the 80's] just little nik naks & such)

Let the chips fall where they may. It is a great learning opportunity for him. If the kids tease him help him deal with that. If not, use it to teach about the imagination. Yes he will eventually learn those things aren't real but if you work it right he will understand it isn't lying it is part of being a child and looking forward to something. I think the kids will want to be in his shoes. $10 is pretty good pay for losing a tooth. In my day it was only coins. Barb K.

I agree with the others that your child will doubtfully run into anyone telling him different at school. My daughter is almost 8 and still believes.

As for the others fussing over the $10.00... you wanted to make it special and you did. The tooth fairy occassionally gives money at my house, but typically has given books or music CD's instead. We think it is awfully nice for the tooth fairy to think outside the box and not promote materialism quite so much with all the cash thrown at the children :D

Hi, J.!
I know your done w/ all this, but I was gonna respond yesterday and the day got away w/ me....
My son is almost 11 and I've been giving $10 a tooth ever since he lost one of the big one's. I used to leave 5 or 6 bucks in quarters.
You know what? He only has two more teeth to loose, and he's done!They are only young for a little while,and if you want to leave 20 bucks a tooth, and can afford to, go for it!
The hardest part isnt parting with the cash, but rather how to sneek it under the pillow!!

My 2nd grader still believes so there is hope!

My husband and I were just talking about this issue ourselves. Our son lost his first tooth this summer and just lost his second tooth Oct. 1st. He got a transformer movie with the first tooth and a Transformer action figure with the second one. He also gets a special note from the tooth fairy that is sprayed with fairy dust. We didn't have to worry so much about the one he lost in the summer since I was home with him and he hasn't said anything in regards to the tooth fairy's being real with the second one, however, we know the inevitable is bound to happen soon. We decided we would sit him down with the two of us and tell him the truth. We have always told him we won't lie to him if he wants to know something (unless he asks what a present is, then we just tell him that it's a surprise)so that is where we stand. A child believes in his parents and needs to be able to trust them, so I believe that a parent should do that. We plan on telling our son the tradition behind the tooth fairy, santa, etc and explaining to him that we wanted him to get to experience the surprise of it. Then, maybe he can help be a part of that magic each year with his 3 year old sister.

Most kids don't realize that the toothfairy, Santa, or the Easter Bunny isn't real until they are in 4th or 5th grade. So he probably won't come home today in tears. But you may want to watch how much the toothfairy gives him. Most kids only get a few dollars. Ten dollars is a lot of money for a tooth and if you plan to keep that amount up, in the end it will be several hundred dollars (and they can lose several teeth in a months time). Other kids may get jealous and start up things with your son about the amount he recieved. If it is a problem, then with the next tooth leave a note that says he gets that amount for the first tooth, but for the other teeth he will recieve "this" much. You can give him more for molars. A friend of mine increased the amount by a dollar for each consecutive tooth her daughter lost and by the 10 tooth wished she hadn't started that, because it was getting expensive.
But, don't worry, at 6 most kids still believe and the few that don't are usually warned by their parents not to say anything. My kids were 9 and 10 before they figured it out. Good luck and God Bless.

Okay, I think some of the other moms may have overreacted with the $10 thing. That's what was left for my son for the first tooth and it was explained to him that the tooth fairy gave you more for the first one since it was a special tooth. My son lost his second tooth on Saturday and woke up to $1 under the pillow and was absolutely fine with it. As for the believing part, I know that I've been worried about what he'll think about me "lying" to him about the tooth fairy, santa, easter bunny, but then I remember that when I found out the truth, I wasn't mad at all, maybe a little upset because some of the magic was gone, but I had a younger sister that I could still indulge, hopefully this will be the same for my son, and yours as well!

$10.00? WOW! All of our kids teeth were only $1 (in quarters). I like the magic of the "Tooth Fairy". It doesn't last all that long, so having a little 'magic' in the house is fun for everyone. I know this will probably be the last year with "Santa" and the "Tooth Fairy" with my oldest (4th Grade) and after that, whatever he learns - he will share with his little brother (two years younger - 2nd grade). They share a bedroom so it's inevitable. However, I think once they learn the news about the "Tooth Fairy" and "Santa", they will enjoy keeping the Magic in the house with their younger siblings (1 & 3 yr old). I won't mind when the older learn the sad news but it will be so cute when they share 'magical stories' of their own with their siblings. They will think they are 'older' when they encourage the 'magic' with the younger ones.

We always give 4 quarters every tooth. It will be hard to follow-up the $10 you started with! Although I have had friends who have given $5 for the first tooth and told their children that the Fairy only does that with the First Tooth Only.

Good Luck in what you decide.

Just let it be...He will ask the questions he needs to when he needs to...Kids need the chance to believe in magic before the reality of life hits them....Let him enjoy it...Kids might tease him, but that teaches lessons, just be there for him when he asks and answer questions as needed....

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