Suggestions Please Help

Updated on September 15, 2012
A.S. asks from Macomb, MI
13 answers

For the last 2 nights my daughter has been waking up in the middle of the night. The other night she went to bed at 9pm and woke up at 12am and would not go back to sleep till 5 am. Tonight the Same thing she went to bed at 10 pm and woke up at 4 and is now finally going back to sleep at 6am. But if i put her down at at 1100 or 1130pm she will sleep all night. If she dosent nap this happens but if she naps she wont go back to till about 1100 or 1130pm. Any suggestions

We do story , bath, snack, cuddle, i have tryed tv , a movie but nothing seems to be working right now..

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K.P.

answers from Dallas on

Why are you giving her a snack right before bed? food feeds the metabolism and is giving her energy, its confusing to her little body

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J.☯.

answers from Springfield on

How old is your daughter? When my boys sarted a simliar sleeping pattern, I took it to mean thye were ready to give up their nap. During the transition we had some grumpy later afternoons, but overall it was worth it.

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

It says on your profile that your daughter is two. At that age, my kids slept very poorly when they were overtired. If I put them to bed too late or they skipped nap, it was very difficult to get them to sleep through the night. That and teething always made for rough nights. I would suggest two things...check for teething and an earlier bed time. 9 p.m. sounds awfully late for a two year old to me.

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

Give her as much time outdoors as possible (play outside, have picnics). Keep all the shades up in the house. She needs more exposure to sunlight. Her body will shut down quicker and she'll sleep deeper as soon as it gets dark.

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A.L.

answers from Charleston on

Sleep begets sleep. Put her to bed at 7:30. Don't give her a nap during the day, or if necessary, a very short one - 1 hour max ending before 3:30 or 4pm. You have to be consistent. You cannot say 7:30 bedtime tonight, and 11pm tomorrow. It has to stay the same for them to develop proper sleeping patterns.

If she is around age 2, she should be tired by 7:30 after a full day. Make sure she gets plenty of physical activity in the morning and afternoon, and a good hearty dinner.

I used this method with both of mine because I wanted time for myself and my husband without the kids around. Kids at that age need anywhere from 10-12 hours of sleep at night.

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T.W.

answers from Syracuse on

You didn't mention how old your daughter is but assuming she's a baby, sounds like she's sleeping in 6 hour stretches (10PM-4AM and 11PM-6/7ish?) That's pretty good. If she's waking up, she may just need something to eat, all sounds pretty normal.

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B.G.

answers from Springfield on

All good suggestions so far. I think kids go through phases. From time to time we've had one of our kids wake for a couple of hours in the middle of the night. It seems to last for a few days. It's exhausting! Sometimes we can point to a major change or disruption in our child's schedule. Other times it seems to come out of the blue. We usually let them sleep whenever they will and try to notice any pattern changes. Then we try to come up with a new schedule.

Our 3 1/2 year old gave up his naps in May. Over the summer I was home, so I could go with the flow. Towards the end of July I started making mental notes of his habits. School started at the end of August, so I tried to do my best to anticipate how much sleep he would need and therefor figure out what time he needed to go to bed. It didn't work perfectly, and we've had to make some changes. But overall, he's doing well.

The one thing you can predict with absolute certainty is that change is inevitable. You have to make adjustments as they grow. Hang in there! I know it's exhausting, but it shouldn't be too long before you figure out your new schedule.

L.L.

answers from Rochester on

You don't mention how old your daughter is, which would be tremendously helpful.

I have a 2.5 year old who has a disastrous sleep schedule --IF it gets thrown off. To bed at midnight, wakes up in the middle of the night, wants to stay up, wants to sleep in late...these are all things I am familiar with.

Here is what I have found to work. First, she DOES still need a nap or she gets cranky. If she doesn't get a nap, she falls asleep TOO early for bed and wakes up at 9 or 10 thinking she's had a nap.

However, that nap HAS to begin in a very small window...basically, between 12 and 1:30 it needs to start, or it will keep her up late. If she even starts it at 2:00, that's too late.

She also needs to get up by 8:00 in the morning...7:00 is better, but it absolutely CAN'T be past 8:00 or that nap I was talking about won't happen when it should.

I guess what I'm trying to convey right now is that it pays to be totally regimented. Try waking your daughter up at 7 every morning and making sure her nap happens right after a good lunch. Don't let her sleep more than 2 hours, and make sure the afternoon is full of fun. :) Make sure she eats a good dinner (hah, I know that one is totally hard to control, but my little one sleeps so much better when she's sat down to a good meal) and again, a little fun after supper is in order. Don't do TV at night...that produces the opposite of what you want. Instead, you can do music, books, etc.

J.B.

answers from Houston on

No snack at least and hour before bed. And the t.v definitely isn't going to help her stay asleep.

M.L.

answers from Houston on

Put her to bed earlier than 9. The "sleep begets sleep" explanation below is right on. As for her refusing to go back to bed, just put her back in there. Give her a small cup of milk, turn on a night light, and turn a fan on to circulate the air and give her some white noise. She may not be asleep, but she can lay quietly until sleep comes. Distracting her from falling back asleep by turning on the tv isn't gong to help. Also, you can try melatonin. It's an all natural supplement that is safe for kids.

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

As others note -- she is probably "overtired" which makes a kid MORE wired and wakeful. She needs a much, much earlier bedtime, the same time every night, and she may also be ready to give up her daily nap; many kids give up naps at around age two or between two and three. Shift her to no nap but a much earlier bedtime.

When she wakes in the night, are you talking to her, picking her up in your arms, sitting on the couch with her, etc.? Go to her of course if she calls but do not interact with her, talk to her, lift her out of her bed, let her get out of it herself, etc. Waking must be utterly boring for her - if you talk to her beyond one simple "Back to sleep, sweetie," it becomes a game for her because she likes for you to talk to her, and you'll be waking her more.

At her age she needs absolute consistency. Your post indicates you are putting her down at greatly varying times, and don't have a really firm bedtime routine (you've tried so many different things, and she needs exactly the same thing in exactly the same order every night). It is very important NOT to make TV or a movie part of your bedtime routine at any age - not at two, not at six, not when they're teens. They appear to be "tired" because they are holding still while staring at the screen, but the flickering images actually stimulate their brains more and make sleep more difficult; check it out online -- TV and film is stimulating, not relaxing, for children, and should not be used at bedtime.

Once you have her on a very reliable routine she will begin to feel more tired because she knows exactly what happens next and her body and brain will begin to expect "It's time to get sleepy now."

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C.B.

answers from Detroit on

Do you have one of those mobiles that not only turns but plays music. Sometimes watching something is close to hypnotic. Soft music can help too.

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

How old? Depending on the age it can mean different things. Just from the little here I would say she is sleeping too much during the day. Little kids only get up if they are not tired. By get up I mean get up and don't attention seek.

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