Son Having Problems with BM

My oldest son had the same problem and after two visits to the emergency room after being so compacted, we found out he was milk intolerant. He has now been on soy milk and away from cow's milk - dairy and casein-free for 4 years and he has not had one problem with having a bowel movement. You may want to try cutting all dairy and casein out of his diet immediately. You will see results within 4 days and know within a week if you are strict with his diet. I would stay clear of any medicines since they can change the muscles and lining of his colon and can cause problems when he gets older. Wish you the best. A.

Hi,
I personlly haven't had this problem with my children but I would definitely take him to the dr. He could have a problem other than just not wanting to go. I know a child that has to take Miralax to help him go. I wish you a lot of luck. Children are suppose to go at least once a day. They may skip a day here and there but thats normal.
Good Luck
S.

My son has the same problem when he was younger he would not go to the bathroom at school. So he held it and when he would get home he still did not go.
He now has a problem called enlarge bowel where he has to take medication to help him empty out.
It is not good he is 18 now and we are still dealing with it. The child has to feel good about having a BM.

yes, have the MD rule out any physical cause
(I am a therapist)
Stool softeners are going to be a common response from others. there are natural ones out there as well -- apricot nectar and apricots are good. Prune juice will cause more bulk.

My son had similar problems. We tried everything. I finally got a referral to a Pediatric gastroenterologist who placed him on a medicine for constipation and recommended metamusil cookies for increased fiber x 2 per day in addition to fresh fruit and vegetables. It helped! We just had another Dr's visit 6 months later and he is doing great and feels so much better. The Doctor wants him to stay the course since it takes a while for the GI system to function properly again. Her name is Dr. Duffy with INOVA ( in the Shady Grove Rd office).Very gentle and helpful. L. O

My 3 year old went through this while potty training. She would go, and even used to go poop in the potty before she got the hang of pee pee. Then all the sudden she started to hold it. She would not go. I pumped up her fiber, gave her water and various juices. I took her to the doctor and they had us give her is mineral oil stuff, that worked ok at first, but not very long. Finally after about a month or so trying what seemed like everything the doc put her on Miralax. What a difference! She can now go! If she doesn't get the Miralax she can't go...I will keep trying to get her off it...but for now at least she is happier! Other people kept telling me to put her on Miralx, but I wanted to go through our doctor...that way she would be monitored.

Good luck.

Check with his pediatrician also. It may hurt for him to have BMs. Make sure he is getting plenty of fluids and fruits & vegetables to make sure his stools are not too hard. It could be a control thing but best to rule out the physical causes first. I have friends whose kids use mira-lax with their kids for the same reason. Good luck.

good for you for wanting to get at the root of the problem with. as the other mothers have said you probably will want to go to an MD as well. this has become a vicious cycle now where he doesn't go and then it hurts to go and then doesn't want to go again. my daughter has this problem. she will talk to me very rationally about why she should go and how she gets owies in her belly when she doesn't and how it needs to come out and the rewards she gets for going on the potty but when it comes time to perform... nothing. her doc put her on a maintenance dose of lactulose which is a very mild stool softener. she will probably be on it for at least another year but we've been very happy with the results. good luck!

Where as it doesnt seem "normal" for a child to poop only once a week, some people dont poop everyday. Make sure you give him plenty of foods w/ fiber so that its easier for him to go. And try to get him to relax about it and offer a reward. Maybe a book to read while in the potty or some relaxing music. Try anything, something is bound to work.
If its a case of him just not wanting to go then you have to figure out why. IF its a case of constipation then treat that.

We went to the Dr. when my then 3 yr old boy wouldn't go. He ended up getting so backed up we had to stop at an ER during a vacation b/c we thought he had appendix issues. Turned out he was just completely clogged.

After doing a few enemas (fun) and putting him on mirelax everyday, he got to the point where he would have to go and it wouldn't hurt. We let him keep using the pullup to go until it was more comfortable, then we moved to the potty. He had a couple accidents at first, but is now fine. (If he'd just flush we'd all be happy!) The trick with the mirelax is to adjust the amount so it's not too loose or too hard. We are military too so I was able to get it from the pharmacy without having to pay, but you can buy it over the counter too.
Good Luck! M.

My suggestion is to not talk to your son about it anymore. Next i would give him stool softeners for the next few days to get him to go more often. What maybe happening is one of two things or Both. One when he goes it hurts because he's holding it. Than on top of it you ask him to go all the time so he's holding it because you ask him to go and he wants to control it so your not in control. But of course he doesn't know this control is what is making it hurt, explaining it to him won't help him understand. Actions speak louder than words. That's why i first tell you to stop talking to him about it which causes him to not think about it and to stop trying to control it. Next giving him the stool softener will help him go more often and it won't hurt so he will get more experiences of going BM with out it hurting and often.
Honestly i don't believe this is a thing you need to take to any doctor this is an age and maybe even gender thing. Boys do it more often than girls and this is also an age thing too. This is the age where he is trying to show control over these things. See i can decide when i need to go to the bathroom you have No control over this. This is my body.

I also say avoid the stool softeners and go with more natural routes. Give plenty of fiber. That means no white flour. Trader Joe's has a great fiber bread. Also plenty of water and lots of fruits and veggies. Seek out an PT who specializes in this issue.
L. M

So reward, as previously mentioned, was the first thing that popped into my mind and, after thinking a second, the book as a distraction while trying may be a consideration, too.

The second thing was that my little sister did the same thing - in her case, she was afraid to go (separation anxiety at "losing" her BM/a "piece" of her, maybe?)and would hold it until impaction. Our mom used prunes regularly and my sis kind of had no choice! So, if you're like me/my fam and would prefer not to use drugs/chemicals, then consider the prunes (in the jar in juice), prune juice, and/or the old housewives remedy that a nurse friend of mine told me when my daughter was a baby: a teaspoon of light Karo syrup in her milk. Don't know whether it would work on a toddler, but it sure did make my daughter let loose!

A.,
My daughter too suffers from having issues. I too also have my daugthter in therapy. She has a bathroom phoebia.She refuses to use any public bathrooms, including school. I have taken her to the doctors, and they recommened that she drinks plenty of water. Miralax daily ! and have him pick a certain time he can relx and sit and read a book in the bathroom, this will help trigger things. It took some time. The correction does not happen over night. He may have his colon enlarged so it will take several months to get it back down to the right size again. Also be careful you dont hurt his self esteem when he does have accidents. My daughter very seldom knew when she had to go because of the enlargement they can lose feeling. If you read the links below you will find you are NOT alone.

http://www.drphil.com/messageboard/topic/2599/46/

http://parenting.ygoy.com/2008/12/04/is-your-child-suffer...

We are dealing with this with my five year old. He has maybe been on the more extreme side where at three he started holding it and would only potty every saturday and it was an ordeal. then all of a sudden it was 14 days and then 20... I took him to a gastrointerologist and we are still dealing with it to this day.

We were told that his colon had been stretched out and wouldn't give him the urge to go because it was stretched out so it took more to get the urge.

You may want to do a reward system... it does help my son try harder to do the duties, but as I said we are still dealing with doctors about this. He says he has no urges to have a BM. so we have him down to every three days, but that is still not enough... My doctor here has said that if they go more then three days they need two inemas one at night to clean out one side of the colon and the one in the morning to clean out the otherside.

In short- If it were me I would seek out a doctor or twos oppinion. I have came to the conclusion that I would rather deal with it now then when he is any older-

Good luck. I know it can be frustrating. I have been on the verge of tears many times with this problem.

You could ask your pediatrician about encopresis. He or she may suggest using a laxative or stool softener. There are several different kinds and some should not be used for more than a short period of time so it is best to seek medical advice. Also, increasing fiber with fruits and vegetables and whole grains might help.

Good luck.

I can definitely help with this issue. I went through this with my then 5 year old who is now approaching 9. At first the military doctors told me he was being lazy or tryin to get attention. It is a good thing I did not believe them. I researched to find there is a name for it called Encopresis. I went back to the doctor with the info in hand and followed the treatment including an xray of the belly area to see how backed up he was. First of all listen to him. If he says things like he didn't feel it happen and his tummy hurts then these are good indicators. My son gets this way in new situations. Every time school starts again I know it is time to start the laxatives. I use Fletchers for kids. Works great and he can use it the first week until he is comfortable with his new surroundings. I hope this helps.

About me.... I have a soon to be 9 YO son, 5 YO son, 3 YO daughter, and 18 month old daughter.

my oldest had this problem too from the time he was 18 months - it was horrible watching him contort himself to hold it in...the dr prescribed glycolax (think that the generic name)...it's a gentle laxative powder that you mix in juice or something similar each day. once he's going more regularly you can wean him off or drop down to every other day etc. until he's no longer holding. good luck to you

A.

My son was exactly the same , he is a very picky eater & the foods that he likes to eat causes constipation , he would hold for days & then when he did go it hurt so much that he was scared to go next time and it went on like this with regular accidents. His ped advised to use Miralax daily , we started with a dose of 5ml but soon realised this was too high as he then had the opposite effect where he couldn't control BM's , it took a few days to find the right dose for him & this was 2.5ml and he then had regular BM's that were formed but not so hard that they hurt (sorry to be so graphic)!!

Hope this is helpful

K.

My daughter had the same problem and still can if I don't keep an eye on her. I took her to several doctors and found that Miralax is the only thing that really helped. It is sold over the counter now. Talk to your pediatrician to make sure you give him the correct dosage. I put it in juice and kool-aid. My daughter didn't know it was there. There is no color, odor, or taste. Good luck and God Bless.

I would take your son to the doctor. My daughter has been having a lot of constipation issues this year, and went 7 days without going poop, and she had to have a cleaning out regimen. We were also told that all the constipation is stretching out inside, which is causing the stool to pack up inside instead of coming out. She now needs to be on laxatives daily for her body to heal and for her to shrink down to normal size inside. Not sure if holding it in would cause the same issues....but I guess you never know, maybe he really can't go?
K.

Give him some prune juice AND LOTS OF WATER DURING THE DAY.
add alittle lemon juice or other fruit flavor and he might
even like it.
Good luck. Be persistant about putting him on the potty, even if he screams & cries.
D. C.

My son had exactly the same problem and I took him to a specialist - his constipation was as severe as your son's. My doctor recommended one tablespoon of Miralax (over the counter powder you can buy anywhere) in his juice/water once a day. It is tasteless and your little one won't even know it. It is safe for children and my son continues to take it every day (he is now 7). How it works is that it is electrolytes that help stimulate the large intestine. Let me know if you would like the name of the doctor that solved our problem.

Talk to your dr. about giving him a stool softner, or something like benefiber.... I always get nervous after day 4.

M.

My daughter had a similar problem earlier in life ~18mos old, still does occasionally now at 4 years old. She was given Miralax, a very mild laxative, tasteless (we put it in her OJ in the am). This will loosen up the stool and make it easier for him to go, and perhaps hurt less - if that is what prompted this in the first place. It is now over the counter - a bit pricey, but well worth it. Good luck.

My son had 'holding' problems and apparently it is quite normal. It can be triggered by one painful BM so they don't want to go again, but it can also be due to many other physical problems. You are good to address the emotional side, but I do recommend you see a pediatric gastroenterologist (sp?). they can send you for an x-ray to see if he is backed up of if once a week is 'normal' for him. They can also guide you on how to get him to start going more frequently, etc.