Sleeping Advice for 14 Month Old

I think the only thing you can do is to try to address the teething as best you can. I don't believe that the "cry it out" method should ever be used if there is a reason for the crying. Since the baby is in pain he should be comforted at 2 or 4 am just like he would be at any other time of the day.

We were in a similar position with our daughter just a couple of months back. She started daycare at about 14 months and was sick for the first 5 weeks with one thing after another. Prior to that, she was a great sleeper, and slept through the night virtually every night. Then she started waking up between midnight and 2 every night. Because daycare was a big change for her, and she was sick (plus I had read that separation anxiety can really kick in at about 14 month and cause them to wake up missing you) we didn't want to employ the cry-it-out method. The first few nights I would rock her back to sleep only to have her wake up the minute I put her back in her crib. This cycle would go on for hours. Then, on a hunch, I tried using the last bit of her usual bedtime routine. The last thing we do before bed is read a book and cuddle in a rocking chair, then I sing her a special bedtime song as I carry her to her crib. So, in the middle of the night, we sat in our reading chair and cuddle until she was ALMOST asleep, then I sang her the song as I laid her in her crib. That worked great! She knew it was time to go to sleep and she knows how to put herself to sleep, so she didn't fuss anymore that night. I had to do this nightly for few weeks, but at least it only took 15 minutes out of my night, not hours! And the best part is that after her sickness went away, she started sleeping through the night again. Hope that helps.

You just described my daughter! I was also pregnant and resorted to either having her sleep in our bed or sleeping on the twin bed next to her crib. She is now 2 and 2 months and is sleeping through most nights on her own. So there is hope! What we did was switch to dad. My husband started going to her in the night, giving her a hug without picking her up, turning on the music, giving a sippy of water and leaving when she was done drinking. The first few nights were a little tough so do it over a weekend. We didn't cry it out either so he had to go in MANY times those first few nights. But after the first week she would still wake up - but go right back to sleep after dad came to her room. He's still on night duty with her (6 months later) but she only wakes up maybe two nights a week and is always very easy to get back to sleep. By the way, she suddenly gave up night drinking so that will end in time, too! We still do put a sippy by her bed, but she only wants it maybe twice a month.
A.

I started putting a drip/leak proof sippy cup with water in my kids beds when they were teething, and it worked great. They can find it themselves and you can sleep. The first couple of nights you might have to go in and just give him the cup but he'll figure it out soon enough. Kids are like adults, they get thirsty at night, this way they can be responsible for quenching their own thirst. :-)

My two year old (youngest of 5) goes through phases where she will sleep through the night and then when the teeth come on she won't and she won't sleep anywhere else but our bed. As soon as she is deeply asleep she's back in her bed. I am finally getting good sleep again!! I don't believe in the cry it out theory, it stresses me out way too bad and makes me very grumpy in the morning, and she is in the same room as her sisters one of whom is a very light sleeper.

maybe since you say he goes through teething spurts when he wakes up try giving him gentle naturals teething drops and 1/2 dose of tylenol or motrin. then give him whatever you give him to drink (milk, water, formula) and see if he will put himself to sleep on his own. my daughter who is also 14mo right now does the same thing time to time i just give her about 2-3oz of water and lay her back down in bed. if she continues to cry for about 10 minutes ill take her out and put her in my bed for about 30min then its back to bed with her and her cup... usually she drinks her cup and plays for a while in the dark before passing back out. good luck i hope this helps!

I know you've gotten a lot of response, but I had such a similar situation and just thought I'd let you know what worked for me. I have a 18 mo old and a 2 mo old. My son slept through the night from 2-7 months and then teething wrecked it. He started waking in the night, so I started bringing him to bed to nurse. Then he got into the habit of falling asleep with mommy and daddy and by 9 months no longer could fall asleep by himself. Well, by 1 year I had had it because I too was pregnant and starting to get to big and didn't want to have him in bed when the baby came.

Someone had given me Good Night, Sleep Tight: The Sleep Lady's Gentle Guide to Helping Your Child Go to Sleep, Stay Asleep and Wake Up Happy by Kim West. I started reading it and it made a ton of sense. It's basically teaching your child how to fall asleep and soothe himself back to sleep when waking at night. I doubted it would work, but tried the method. The first night he cried for 1 1/2 hours. The second night 1 hour, the third night 20 minutes, and by the 4th night he was sleeping straight through.

He occassionally wakes at night, especially when sick or teething, but we following the same methods of soothing him and reassuring him and he's able to go right back to sleep. It changed our lives!

Good luck - blessings,

D.

I had a lot of trouble with my first boy with sleeping issues. Try Elizabeth Pantley's book "No cry sleep solution". It gives you reassurance that attachment parenting solutions can work. Best of all it gives you a few different things to try for a lot of different problems.

It was a long process for us but I'm a firm believer in doing the hard work first as an investment in the future. Be consistent with what you try, make the changes slowly and keep it loving. We had a very difficult road but followed the suggestions as well as our own instincts. I admit that I was pushed to try "cry it out" once, but the look on his face and how it made me feel squashed that method immediately. Now our 3 1/2 year old sleeps wonderfully (started getting better at about 1 1/2).

I will emphasize that it was not easy but I look back on that time now and am so happy that I "suffered" through it a little bit and contributed to the happy boy I have today. You will make up the sleep at some point in the future but the feeling of pride and "a job well done" makes up for the difficulties.

The middle of the night waking is a part of the first few years and as you know, old problems fade and new ones surface. You will get through this!

I don't know how to answer your problem, but I do know the greatest book that I read and implemented this last few weeks for both my 6 month old baby and 3 year old daughter - it is called: "Healthy Sleeping Habbits Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth
The book is great it explains the importance of sleeping and this gave me more confidence knowing that what i was doing is in their best interest. Both my kids now sleep like a dream. My 3 year old goes down earlier and sleeps through the night and my 6 month old is in his crib sleeping beautifully. They both wake up happy they are not exhausted. They are sooooo happy now.
A friend of mine who is a pediatric nurse has turned me on to this book and it really worked for us. Also, she really supported me for a week or so, I called every day when they cried and she explained to me the benefits on the long term -she was so right! Now they sleep well, my husband and I have quality time together and the most important thing is they are rested, happy. Sleeping is so crucial in their development.
One thing that my friend told me was that sleeping, just like walking and eating -has to be taught to the kids. It makes sense. They don't just stand up and start running, it takes a few days.
I hope this helps. I know you can do it and it will be so much easier now before you have the second one. Congratulations to your new baby coming!
One last thing...the book talks about the most important thing is routines...kids thrive on it. You can create "bad" routines and good ones, they will learn it. The best thing is that he is only 14 months and you can help him, just what ever you do - stick with it. It's a lot easier on kids even if they fight it at first, they will learn. They are amazing little creatures.

Hi A.:
You say,that you've created some (bad habits)I'm guessing, that you mean,you have built a close bond with your baby,by rocking him(soothing him to sleep)each night,and now you want him to (not want that)It would be like (you growing accustom to your husband cuddling up next to you every night,too him suddenly leaving you lay there alone. Oh...and while you were in pain. How would that ajustment be for you? I have to assume,that you are having problems with this pregnancy,as at five months,you shouldn't be that big and uncomfortable,that it hurts to sit and rock your baby.I can't help but sense that your real complaint is his (sleeping with you) Your son is only A little over a year old. He's hurting,and doesn't understand why. He IS NOT going to understand your pleas for more understanding,or your plans for a better nights sleep, He is not mature enough to comprehend logic. CIO,is not good for the baby,or you. Especially in your condition.It can be a tremendously frustrating,heart-wrenching hurtful experience for you,and your baby will only feel abandoned,and ignored.I would recomend Staying in his room with him,and rocking him,after giving him something for his pain.YOU are the one that brought him into your bed. You need to get him use to being back in his own room,but it can be done in a soothing mater, You need patience. This is an excellent time to practice that,as you'll have to have plenty once your second arrives in September.The very best to you A..

The only thing that finally stopped the middle of the night wakings for me and my now 17 month old was letting her fuss it out. The first night was horrible, with me and my husband sitting straight up in bed for over 20 minutes, and finally getting up and turning off the monitor. After about 45 minutes she fell asleep and woke up every hour or two and cried for about 20 minutes each. It was horrible, but the next night, she only cried for a couple of minutes, and only woke up once more, for a few minutes. And each night was less and less and after about the fourth night, she slept 11-12 hours straight through!! It was really hard, but looking back, will that 4 nights effect her in the long run, or will poor sleeping habits for her AND ME (and Hubby who has to get up and go to work!) going to affect her? I DID NOT want to resort to this, and even ignored the suggestions of it, until I just had to get some sleep. I am so proud to say, in the 6-7 months she has been sleeping through the night, she has only fussed once for a couple minutes, and the entire family is less stressed and sleeping better. And on a personal note, my "interest" in Hubby has kicked up, which he appreciates, my weight has started to drop off, and my older daughter gets a happier, calmer mother. I think the 4 nights was worth it, but you have to decide for yourself. Good luck with whatever you decide, and congrats on the new baby!

Hi A.!

I totally understand this problem. I've had success with my daughter - here's what I've done.

First of all, if he's teething, try homeopathic teething gel or tablets when he first starts crying. Second of all, tell him earlier in the day when he's wide awake and in really good communication with you that you're going to work together to have him sleeping through the night. Ask him for his help. Then, when he wakes up, go in there and give him some gel or tablets. Rub his belly or back - but keep him in his crib. Don't get him up. After a bit let him have his bottle or binky - but again don't get him up. Just sit there with him. You may have to sit there awhile but don't get him up - maintain physical contact until he falls asleep. If you've already been patient do things like this, then you may need to let him cry it out. But I have to tell you the most important part of this is talking to him earlier in the day. Let him know you need your sleep too and that you'll be a better Mommy to him if you get more sleep. Good luck!!!

Hi. I am a parent coach and a proponent of the family bed. We had a big family bed for about ten years and it was one of the most delightful parts of my child rearing time. My husband and I have three kids. We began by putting the baby's bassinet right next to the bed. It was easier on me to breast feed - I could hear my baby before his (and later- her) cries made him really awake. He would nurse and then easily go back to sleep - in the bassinet. Then - we squeezed a toddler bed into our room (right next to our bed) - and that became his bed, and the bassinet was his new sister's. Then, she moved into bed with us(she wanted more mommy time and so I gave it). Next, the bassinet became my new little one's and we squeezed in another toddler bed for my daughter, and kept the bassinet at the foot of the bed until baby number three joined us in our bed. Everybody adjusted really well to this arrangement and my husband and I cherished the closeness. Kids can be pretty heavy sleepers when they feel safe and loved - We did set up the other bedroom (when we had a two bedroom house) with bunk beds and their drawers and toys and clothes etc. . . .and suggested that they nap there or that if they wanted more space or privacy then that room was for them, but they were happy most of the time with the family bed. When we moved to a bigger house and had another bedroom, my oldest (I think he was nine) claimed the room as his and had no problem adjusting to being alone at night AT ALL. My two younger kids had bunk beds set up in the other bedroom and they agreed to make that their bedroom, however, we still have a twin bed smooshed up against our bed and we told the kids that if anyone needed to sleep in our room they could. My youngest joined us occasionally (and I LOVED it - he is so snuggly and delightful!) and the other two would sometimes sleep there if they had a bad dream or weren't feeling well - BUT there were no 'bad habits' that needed to be 'broken'. Enjoy this time with your baby! They really do grow up so fast! My kids are now 17, 14 and 10. They are healthy, confident, and affectionate. Listen to your heart about how to care for your child. Say yes as often as you can. - to them and to you. P.S. All of our kids slept throught the night by the age of about 6 months - we NEVER had sleep struggles.
in friendship, J. molina

My son is now 20 months and we had the same problem. After a couple exhausted nights (I am pregnant as well) I wondered if he was waking up specifically so he could end up in our bed. So for the next few nights I waited a little longer each night to go to him and it worked!! In about 3 days he was back to sleeping through the night in his crib.

My little boy also sleeps through the night, UNLESS he's teething! It's horrible! Lately he wakes up at same time 2 or 4, if not both, and won't lay back down, cuz he wants to go to my bed. I don't want to create bad habit of him sleeping with us, since he never has!!! But I give him Tylenol before he goes to bed, with Origel, that seems to help sometimes. If he wakes up I just put him in my bed until he falls asleep and right back to his crib. It's hard! I'm not a big fan of "cry it out" either. I just try to keep him comfortable!
Good luck! I'm sure it will pass.

I just had a friend tell me today that she did the "cry it out" thing 4 days ago. She said the first night was really hard cause she cried for 40 minutes. She said she literally had to hang onto the bed and talk to herself in order to keep herself there! She told herself she would go in after 30 minutes, but after 30 minutes passed her baby was doing a soft cry so she left her alone. In 40 minutes it was all over and she slept the rest of the night. The second day she said she cried (not as hard this time) for about 30 minutes. The last two nights she said she hasn't cried at all!

I know the "cry it out" theory seems harsh, but at 14 months old, you're right, it's just a bad habit now. Teething ALWAYS messes things up, but the good news is children are FAST learners. It's not just tough love, it's that you are teaching your son. Despite what some people think, sleeping through the night does not come naturally to all babies.

As for the drink. I have left a sippy cup with water in bed with my baby, or somewhere she can reach it from her bed. However, once your son learns to sleep through the night, he won't need it! Good luck!