Sleep Help - Sarasota,FL

Maybe the neighbors were worried that something was wrong. Do they have kids? Before I had kids, I had no idea what the nights were like. Maybe they honestly don't know what's normal. So if you approach them, I'd approach them in a nice way and just explain. Let them know about the Ferber method and even explain it's temporary. You're the one that has to deal with them, not us.

I also did the Ferber method. It went really well with my dd. A few months later we went on vacation. When we got back home, we had to go through it again. It was much quicker after that. Some kids like routine and we threw hers off.

Your neighbors seem to be seriously overreacting! It's too bad that you're dealing with that on top of a normal baby-sleep issue but obviously you will have to find a way. I agree with the first mom who told you to let them call. Your only concern is your son and if someone can't deal with a baby crying, that's their problem. Since you achieved getting your son to sleep on his own once before, you will be able to do it again. I am also a Ferber method Mom and my daughter has responded beautifully to it and adjusted to falling asleep on her own after only 3 nights. Now, if and when she wakes in the night, even if she cries out briefly, I don't jump up to get her, simply listen to her on the monitor and 99% of the time, she soothes herself back to sleep. She's a thumb-sucker, so her "paci" is always available. If she's truly frantic, of course, I respond immediately and make sure all is well, but just stick with it, do what your heart tells you is best and trust your instincts. Only you know what's best for your little one. As for your cranky neighbors, good luck with that. Obviously, if windows are open, etc. I would use A/C instead and close them tightly to try to help it out. I might also suggest that they get a sound machine to help them drown out outside noises once they fall asleep.

First of all, I think that your neighbors are absolutely crazy. Second of all really what are the cops going to do??? You're baby is crying...that's what babies do as long as your not hurting the baby...then tell your neighbors to just DEAL WITH IT....there is nothing your neighbors can do. Don't even worry about making them mad..you pay to live there right? Tell them to mind there own business. I'm sorry that just really makes me angry..I wish I lived by you..I tell them a thing or two! LOL Good luck your baby will start sleeping ok again I am expecting mine in 2 months. But I have babysat lots and worked in daycares..let them cry for no more than 10 mintues then go in the room..or sit by the crib till they fall asleep and eventually move furhter and further away till your out the door!! Only time will tell what works for you and your baby! GOod luck and remember pay no attention to your nasty neighbors!!

First of all the Neighbors will just have to call the police.
second give him a really big dinner and get him really full and bath will let him sleep well....don't let him nap after 5-6 pm leave the paci in his crib where it is visiable and he knows he can have it anytime! and if all else fails you rock him and let him know M. is right there.
third you can invest in a 2 way monitor where you can hear him and he can hear you too. even if you have to leave it right near your head so he can hear you breathe. LOL it works i tell ya. Hope this info works! ~M.

That is horrible! My son is 8 months and is now having separation anxiety when I leave his room at his night time. I have to let him cry it out too. It sucks. My first son went through the same thing too. It's just a stage and it'll pass....eventually. I would complain to the police about the stupid neighbors next time. Or give them a nice gift, a couple set of ear plugs along with a harrassment letter. You should tell them that every time the baby cries and they call the police, just about the time the police show up and ring the doorbell/knock loudly is when you've just got the baby to sleep and it starts all over again. Some people are nuts!? What do they expect you to do?! I think you are doing great. Best of luck, Jen

Dear D.,

I don't know what to tell you except that you have some pretty mean neighbors. I feel for you. I can't imagine what I would do. The bottom line is that kids cry and there is not much to do to stop them. I just hope that the cops have kids too and that they understand you. Maybe you should talk to an attorney to what you should do about your neighbors. This kind of people would make me nervous. Good luck!

D.

Hi D.,
First of all, your neighbors are a couple of "donkey holes"!!!! Secondly, I would go to the Homeowners Association for your Condo and file a formal complaint, then I would call the police (or wait until they come out again) and file a harrassment complaint with them against said "donkeys".
Other than that, keep doing what you need to do to help your son. KEEP UP THE EXCELLENT WORK!!!!!!!!!!

Crying babies are not a crime and the police will know this when the stupid neighbors continue to call over the same issue. You can't do anything to change the behavior of other people, so try not to worry about them.
Keep the nursery dark and between 68 and 72 degrees at night. The best thing that I've found to keep my children sleeping is a sound machine. We, personally, sleep to the sound of rain. But any white noise will work. One of my sons would not sleep through the night at all until we got his machine and ever since then we've had no problems. It's worth a shot.
The main thing to keep in mind is that he is still just a baby. Any number of things could be waking him up. Maybe he's learning to walk and it's got his brain stimulated. Maybe he's teething or going through a growth spurt and is hungry. It's all phases and they will all pass. Keep strong and you'll get through it just fine.

Definately forget your neighbors. Next time the police come out. Ask them if you can file a complaint against the neighbors for harassment. Maybe that will hush them up. I agree with you about the baby sleeping in the bed. I could never sleep with my daughter. Too many children die that way and I was always uncomfortable about it and didn/t do it. Only you know what's best for your son. You do what you need to and don't worry about what anyone else says or thinks. If you were able to get him to sleep that way once, you will be able to doit again. Just give it a couple days.

If it were me, I would go and talk to the neighbor (who obviously don't have children) and apologize for any inconvience that your child is causing but explain that babies cry and sometimes for no reason and that they just need to be patient and eventually the baby will sleep through the night.

I know it's hard, but just remember there is nothing you can do except continue with your life. Good luck

wow, that is a tough situation. I have often wondered how hard it would be to raise children in a condo/apartment atmoshphere. I always rocked my son to sleep and it never affected his ability to sleep through the night. This could be a much more peaceful option and I think it is better than putting him in your bed. That will only make him sleeping a full night in his bed even harder I would think. Try the rocking for a while. If he wakes for it a few times, don't get discouraged. He will just need some time to adjust to this new method and i bet he will stop waking. i have never had to CIO, but maybe i am just lucky.

I'm sorry I really don't have advice about the sleeping problem, cuz my daughter is going through the same thing. Why I'm responding is because of your neighbors, I would tell them where to go and how to get there, children cry at night, if they don't like then maybe they should leave. As far as them calling the police there's nothing that they can do. Just be patient, and don't worry about your neighbors, tell them to get over themselves.

Hello D.,
First, let those idiotic people call! They never had kids? I wouldn't give a rats behind about them. It is YOUR house, not theirs! So what if he cries! My baby is 11 months old and she went through the same thing about a month ago. I would let her cry for 5 minutes, either she would go back to sleep, or keep crying, and that is when I would change her diaper or rock her for a while and in about a week, it was okay! I can't say it enough, your neighbors are not nice, and if he needs to cry, so be it! Good luck! M.

I have a few choice words for your neighbors, none of which are nice, lol. Obviously these people either never had kids or were blessed with ones that didn't cry. I don't much care for the Ferber method myself, but that's the choice you've made and you should stick with it. I totally agree with you though about not having your son sleep with you. It'll just be a habit that will need to be broken later on, anyway. Have you tried just picking him up long enough to calm him down and then putting him back in his crib, during the nights? My daughter gernally sleeps thru the night, only waking up either b/c she went to bed earlier than usual or because she isn't feeling well. I have always let her fall asleep on me, either pacing with her, or just sitting in the rocking chair with her and her book. Once in a great while, neither of those works fast enough for me, so I'll take her into my bedroom, which is pretty much pitch black, and I lay her on my bed and just lay next to her. Perhaps some music would help your son - and don't be afraid to use something other than babies lullabies. My daughter actually likes dance music or country and hates lullabies.Out of curiosity, what do the police say/do when they show up? I realize that especially with a child involved, they have to check out the complaint, but when they see the baby is fine, don't they go back to the neighbor and tell them to mind their own business? I wouldn't worry too much about it, and hopefully they will move. But perhaps you could file a complaint where you live, if they handle things like that. Or you could check with the police to see if there is anything you can do about them.

WELL, I BABSICALLY HAVE TO SAY WHAT EVERY MOTHER HAS TOUCHED ON. I JUST CANT BELIEVE HOW INCONSIDERATE YOUR NEIGHBORS ARE. WHEN MY DAUGHTER WAS A BABY (SHE'S 4 NOW), I LIVED IN AN APARTMENT, WITH THIN WALLS. MY DAUGHTER HAD SOME LUNGS ON HER TOO, YOU'D THINK I WAS BEATING HER OR SOMETHING THE WAY SHE WOULD SCREAM. YEAH THAT'S RIGHT, SHE DIDNT CRY, SHE JUST SCREAMED. FORTUNATELY MY NEIGHBORS WERE UNDERSTANDING. FOR MY DAUGHTER, IT WAS JUST A PHASE SHE WENT THROUGH, WHICH IT SEEMED TO BE A LONG PHASE. YOU'RE NEIGHBORS CAN DEAL WITH IT OR THEY NEED TO MOVE. I CANT IMAGINE WHAT THE POLICE WOULD SAY TO YOU. HOW DO YOU TELL SOMEONE TO MAKE THEIR BABY QUIT CRYING? IT JUST SOUNDS CRAZY TO ME. MY ADVICE, JUST DO WHAT'S BEST FOR YOUR SON. IF YOUR NEIGHBORS KEEP CALLING THE POLICE, I'D FILE A HARRASMENT CHARGE ON THEM, AS SOMEONE ELSE SUGGESTED. ALSO THE EAR PLUGS AS A GIFT WAS A GREAT IDEA! TAKE CARE AND GOOD LUCK!

Good Morning-

I am going to answer this as nice as possible. If I were you, I would tell your neighbors to go to hell! Its not like you are college kids and partying, your dog isnt profusely barking, your not fighting, yelling or screaming, you have a 10 month old son! He is going through the motions of being a child. Your not hurting him, hes simply crying. Maybe they need to go to bed, or turn on a fan. I work at an attorneys office, and I tell you, I would go down to TPD, on 7th Avenue, and sit and talk with someone. Or maybe go to your office manager at your complex. THEY are the problem, not you and not your son. And your absolutely correct that he should not be in your bed. If the cops were called everytime one of my twins woke up crying at that age (cause one would wake the other constantly), they might as well have just pitched a tent in my yard. This is where I would just have to be stern with the neighbors and really tell them that having a young child is enough, THEY CRY, THATS HIS COMMUNICATION! But you dont need them on top of it. I am so sorry you have to deal with this, but I would seriously tell them to F**K OFF! In the nicest way possible.