Seperation Anxiety? - Frankfort,KY

Updated on August 28, 2008
L.W. asks from Frankfort, KY
4 answers

My daughter is 2 years old. This is her second week at a new Daycare. She previously had a private sitter with one other little girl who was 5 months younger than her. She was with this sitter since she was 7 weeks old. She was basically another grandmother to my child. Ava has cried everyday that I have taken her to daycare. She clings to me and cries even in the car when she realizes where we are going. She has never been one to do this so it really bothers me. She has always been fine with me leaving her and basically ignores the fact that I am even leaving. This is such a change in her and I am not handling it very well. I thought it was just the fact that we had changed sitters but her old sitter watched her for a while for me on Saturday and she did the same thing that she does at daycare (cries and clings). Is this the age that they start to have seperation anxiety? How do we cope with this and how can I make her feel better? It absolutely tears me apart to see her so upset. This daycare is wonderful, I am not worried about her being "mistreated" or anything but I don't know what to do.

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D.P.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi L.,
First of all -don't stress yourself out. My son was the exact same way- even after 2 mos of daycare, he was still clingy and fussy when my husband or I would drop him off. Now- 5 mos later, he loves his daycare and his new friends. At the time though, I was so concerned, I even posted about it here! She is probably just anxious right now, but I promise it will get better as she gets adjusted and falls in the routine at the daycare. Some kids just take longer than others- it will just seem like a lifetime for you! :)

3 moms found this helpful
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J.S.

answers from Chattanooga on

Hi L.

It is aweful to hear them cry isn't it?
You just need to be consistent. I actually found with my son (his school had a car drop off) that he did a lot better if I dropped him off in the car line verses walking him in. As hard as it is, tell her you love her and you will be back to get her....she will be fine. She will get through it. It may take several months, but she will pass through this phase. It really is harder on us, than them :)
You stated you have had a lot of change lately and she is probably just reacting to that. As this becomes your normal routine it will get easier.
I think the worst thing you could do is to make a big deal about it. If she is happy when you pick her up, then you know it is just this phase. Good Luck and hang in there, be strong :)
J.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.E.

answers from Charlotte on

I can relate to your situation, and I know it is a horrible feeling to drop your child off somewhere when she doesn't seem happy.

Will the daycare allow her to have a special blanket or stuffed animal from home? If so, try spraying a little of your perfume or her Dad's cologne on it. This was comforting to my daughter at naptime when she switched from a home daycare to daycare center.

Also, when we got into the car each morning, I would draw a heart on the back of one of her hands with a washable marker. She loved that -- not sure why exactly, but it helped. If she got out of the car and went in to daycare smiling, I drew a smiley face on the back of her other hand when we walked in to her room. Not only was she focused on smiling as we walked in to daycare, she wanted to go around her room showing everybody her hands as soon as she got into her class. This distracted her from the typical separation anxiety, and she made more little friends in her class.

Within a week or so she wasn't interested in the marker thing any more. She had, however, gotten used to going into daycare smiling and had made new friends. The whole daycare process was easier, and it eased my nervousness, too.

I'll keep your family in my prayers...

1 mom found this helpful
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T.H.

answers from Nashville on

My daughter is 2 1/2 and is actually doing the same thing. The difference is she is at home with me and has been since she turned 2 in December. If I leave her with dad, grandmother or go to the grocery store. She cries and cries. She was in daycare from 6 months to 2 years and loved it. Daycare closed and I could not find anywhere I was comfortable with so I quit my job to stay home with her. Now I have a job opportunity close to home and good money. I am trying to figure out what I am going to do and try and transitin her back into daycare. My question is who or where. I have not found anywhere that I am impressed with, which is sad. I noticed you said she was in a great daycare, do you mind sharing where this is?? Thanks

1 mom found this helpful
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