Santa Question

Given the age, it's pretty clear that your child might already know the truth. Especially if they are voicing it to you. When our son expressed doubt, we asked if he was really ready to know and then we told him. He was shocked, but mostly because he couldn't believe that we had bought him all those things for so many years. The conversation then led into the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. We explained that he now had a big responsibility to his sister and all his cousins (and other children) not to ruin the surprise. It's been so fun watching him talk about Santa to the little kids in our family. He always looks sideways at us with a little wink. It won't be a disappointment to your child---but rather some confidence in how they are growing up. Good luck!

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Our kids are now 15 and almost 21. when they were younger and asked about santa because some older kid told them there was no santa, I would ask them if they believed in santa. I told them that as long as they believed, there was a santa. we pulled this off until they were almost 13. it was harder when the older one didn't believe any more, but we still managed it for the younger one.

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We had the talk with our oldest child when she was about 9 or 10. We also told her that since she was old enough to know..... that she became a little Santa Helper herself and had to help with her little sister not finding out. That way it was a grown up talk and she was excited to help. She still helped put cookies out etc.....

BUT she is now 28 and if you ask her if she believes in Santa she will say YES!! I explained that if you don't believe in Santa then Santa doesn't come!!! So now even though she's a mom herself, she still says she believes!!!

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Those who believe, receive. He's real so long as you believe. Two quotes my mom always used. :)

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We have told each of our boys that Santa is magical and is real to those who believe. Even my older son never told my younger son that there was no Santa. Now they are teenagers and they still enjoy receiving presents from Santa. I know that they know there is no Santa but they know that I enjoy giving them Santa gifts.

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Wow, I can't believe that some of these ladies tell their kids that "If you don't believe in Santa, the Santa presents will stop". That is EXACTLY like saying, "If you refuse to believe the lies I told you, you will be punished". Yikes!

We never believed that Santa (as America knows him) was real and my mom gave us presents from "him" for fun. Christmas in our house has always been the most anticipated and beloved holiday in our household WITHOUT Santa! Santa doesn't make Christmas special.

If I were you, I would tell him. The history of St. Nicholas is a wonderful, TRUE story of a man with a generous heart and a lot of love for the poor. I love that your son is super sensitive, because he would probably have a tender heart like St. Nicholas! :) You can probably find the whole story on the internet somewhere.
You could also tie it in with being a secret St. Nicholas. There are giving trees in stores like Target or Wal-Mart and he could choose a gift for a child that may not get a gift this year. Christmas is FUN!

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When my oldest started questioning, we went to the library and got a nonfiction book on the whole history of Santa. That convinced him that he must be real because there was a book about him. Then we discussed how he was a real person, and started these traditions, and when he died the people kept them going. So then he got to be part of the tradition, and help be Santa for his younger siblings. He discovered how much fun it was to be Santa.

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When my daughters started asking if I was Santa, I would answer a question with a question. When asked "Mommy, are you Santa?" I would say something like "Why do you ask?" They really didn't want to "know" even though they had figured it out:-)

on Easter this past year we did a treasure hunt for the easter morning event. We had clues that led the kids from one egg to the next. The last clue led to a park where I was waiting. Our children (almost 10 yrs old and 6 1/2 yrs old) at the time figured out that I was the Easter Bunny that day, and they were NOT UPSET at all. After they figured that out the younger one looked at us and said, "You're Santa and the tooth fairy too, aren't you?"
They both thought it was cool that we were doing all those fun things for them all those years and weren't upset at all. They also said that was the most fun way to find out!

I'd research St. Nicholas on the web, and then explain to him where the inspiration for Santa Claus came from...it's not really a total lie, but Santa is a fun way to honor St. Nick. If you are honest with him about the origins I think it may go over better.

Hi, My kids are little yet, so it hasn't come up for me, but I can remember me asking my mom about it when I was a kid. Her response to me was, "if you believe you receive!"

Take care!

Obviously they will all come to know he's not real, BUT it does not have to ruin the magic of Christmas. Christmas is about giving and I agree about the St. Nicholas story. The gifts are still surprises no matter who they are from and were picked especially for each person and that is very magical! It's a good time to learn about giving and graciously receiving for young adults, make it an exciting time for growing for the child. Happy Holiday's!

You mean there's no Santa?!!! j/k

"You have to believe it you want to receive!!" has been my sister's mantra :) And you can't ruin it for anyone else is the rule when it becomes more obvious.

That said, when my daughter asked my hubby & I talked about Saint Nicholas (a really cool saint, look up what he accomplished & why he's remembered and the saint upon whom the modern Santa is very loosely based) and how the spirit of giving is important. From there you can talk about how we can help spread the spirit of giving in this world and be like St. Nicholas. It helps soften the blow.

Good luck!
D.

This is what I said, "If you stop believing in Santa, you don't get presents from him. Those kids that say there is no Santa, don't get presents from him."

This stopped their inquiries cold. Now, when asked directly from my then 10 yr old if their dad and I were Santa, I said, "Yes, but if I ever hear you say you don't believe in Santa - Santa gifts will stop."

As far as I know, my 7, 8 and 11 year olds all believe in Santa.

There's no Santa!!!! My mom did it real well. When we started asking she would respond w/ do you want there to be a santa claus? And of course we would answer yes, then she would say then don't question him. That the mall santa's weren't real of course, but that by believeing in the spirit of santa he would live on. And that was it. No explaination and absolutely not admitting that she did anything.
That made it really special. Cause of course as a child of 10...sometimes younger, you know there's no possible person santa. However, not saying it out loud lets ya be a kid for a little bit longer.
As far as I'm concerned, every xmas morning I still believe in santa!

Last year my 10 year old son asked me point blank about Santa. Not wanting to lie to him I told him that his father and I put the presents under the tree, but if people want to believe in Santa, then he is real. That way he could choose to believe or not. Other kids his age already know, but I told him not to discuss it with other kids because parents want to be the one to tell them, and they didn't want them finding out from other kids.
It is also kind of fun when the older one knows and can play it up with the younger kids. It makes them feel grown up.

From the time my kids starting asking I told them that Santa is the "spirit of giving" at Christmas. He has lots of helpers including moms and dads but the day itself is about the baby Christ whom Christmas was named after. They started helping with wrapping packages and giving to the needy, ect. The holiday turns itself around with very little coaxing from you. Kids love to help and be part of everything going on (especially the secrets that younger sibelings haven't been yet told). Of course that same spirit will give to the helpers for being SOOOO good. Have fun with them mommy. They grow so quickly. Merry Christmas!!

Santa is magic, and if you believe in magic, you believe in santa.
i do love the suggestions on telling them the history of st nick and how we carry out that tradition today.

I told my older two (18 and 15 now)"part of the magic of christmas is believing in santa" and just left it at that. All kids know by a certain age, and i just never confirmed it with a "yes i am santa" statement. I assume i will do the same when my youngest (4 yo) asks. Reitterate that it is fun to believe in santa, and that is what matters. Roll it all up in love for your family, and religious beliefs, and hopefully they will carry on the magic!

When my 8-year-old asked me if there is a Santa... I answered it back with another question. "Do you believe in Santa?" My son said yes and I told him there was a Santa. He then asked me why kids at school say parents are Santa Claus. I told him that those kids don't believe so Santa doesn't come to them anymore..so their mom and dad has to do it now. He's nine and still believes because I didn't want the magic of Christmas to disappear for him yet. If he comes back saying why you did tell me the truth, my answer would be that I didn't want the magic to end for him until he is older.

When my youngest boy (I think he was around 8 at the time)talked with me about Santa, he was terrified when I told him he came into the house while he was sleeping to leave him and his brothers their presents. There was no talking him out of it so I finally had to tell him that that part of Santa Claus was just a story. So I think it depends on the child. But I also want them to love the magic and pretending and know that Santa stands for love. I found a lovely children's book called, Santa are you for Real? that deals with the origins of Santa. I'd recommend it to anyone.
Last year I found another book I like too. It's called,A special place for Santa. It's a story about how Santa found the Christ child and his prayer.

It's better if they hear it from you and that you can explain the stories that inspire people to "play Santa" to their kids, year after year. Even as adults, we have "Secret Santa" gift exchanges - the desire to believe never truely goes away.

I believe when you lie to a child in the beginning, when the truth surfaces its a blow that could take time to heal. My suggestion would be that you find a truthful sweet way to tell her so that you, as her mother can soften the blow because kids at school will not consider her feelings. She will be ok and so will you! Good Luck!