Reasons for Homeschooling

I am a public school teacher (community college) and I send my kids to private school because the public k-12 schools in my district are very much below standard. We also have gang problems. I do not mention details when folks ask about why my kids attend a private school. I simply say that parents need to make the best choices for their individual children.

I say the same thing that I say now when my homeschool friends ask why my kids will be going to public school next year. It's just what works for us. My son was way behind in public school in second grade and I didn't want my daughter in the local school district to start K. So we pulled my middle son and kept him and my daughter home. Well we just finished up 3 years of homeschooling and the kids have the chance to go to a better school and want the experience and as 3rd and 5th graders want the sports and extras that come with school. (not that we didn't do that stuff, but it is different). So homeschooling worked when we started and now this is what works, no big deal, and no big deal for everyone to hear that whole story, it just is.

Just say you feel it's the right thing for your family. Most people really don't want to hear the whole spill anyways.

Really, you make a lot of generalizations about public schools anyways, just like some would say all homeschoolers are weird and socially awkward. So, when you are speaking to someone who really is interested, say your reasons, but realize that it may not be that other person's experience and have respect for that.

"There are some excellent schools and some dedicated teachers in our country [or state, or city or town], but homeschooling works best for our family right now."

Yeah-this would be a discussion I would avoid at all costs. Honestly-there are really not many people that are going to agree with what you are doing and nothing you could say will sway them to your side. (That is how I feel as well BTW-the only reason I could ever see to do it is if the child were in true danger in an unsafe school or if the school is greatly underperforming. ) And this is probably why nobody brings up the subject with you-they do not want to have an argument about it. So I would probably just say that it was a decision that made the most sense to your family and leave it at that.

We homeschool our kids for pretty much all the reasons you mentioned. But if you don't really want to go into detail about the reasons you homeschool, you could just pick the one reason that feels the strongest to you, or your favorite one, or the one that you feel like would make the most sense to the person you are talking to. For example, I've met a few moms this year who used to be public school teachers and are now teaching their own kids at home. For a lot of them, they are doing it because the schools here in California are completely overcrowded. Children learn more with one-on-one instruction rather than being in a classroom with 30 other kids.

Personally, I want my kids to keep their love of learning for as long as possible, and I love being the one who is there with them when they are learning. When I see them writing in their journals, or coming up with elaborate and imaginative games and stories during their free time, or creating art projects from their own imaginations, or playing with other kids at the park, I am really happy and feel lucky that I am able to be there with them and watch it happen.

But many people don't agree with it and for some reason are adamantly against homeschooling (especially those who don't know much about it); so it's much easier to keep it simple rather than engaging in a debate. Just say that you feel it's the best decision for your family (after all, it is a personal decision for every family) and leave it at that. Or that you believe that she learns more at home. Yea for homeschooling! :-)

I would just say "we felt it was the right choice for our individual situation and for my daughter's needs". That should be non-offensive to anyone.

If they are genuinely curious (not combative) they will ask a follow up questions and then you can decide how many of your 'reasons' to divulge.

I come from a whole family of teachers. Interestingly enough, many of them support our decision based on what they witness at work every day!

For the ones who don't, I tell them we like it, then change the subject, just as I would any other personal and controversial topic.

I agree with your answers and that is part of the reason we homeschool too. One thing that I have come to say as why we chose homeschooling is that is what we feel is best for our family. No one should be offended at that statement since that is what each family must decide for themselves.

I don't homeschool, would never consider it, I find it odd and I am a teacher as well as successful business owner. That is just my opinion and it does not mean your choice for homeschooling is right or wrong just like my opinion is neither right or wrong.

You don't "owe" anyone any explanation. You have your reasons that you feel are right for your family and homeschooling is what you chose to do.

I am not offended by those who choose to homeschool. We happen to be in an area with top quality public schools and I have no issue with the system we are currently in. That said... there are some areas that have very poor public schools and if I were faced with that, I'd have my daughter in a private school.

I applaud you for making that choice. It is a personal decision. While my husband and I are going the public school route for now (we are in a top notch district) we will continue to be vigilent about the curiculum. We are a conservative family and while I think your explanation was very appropriate and non offensive...I am afraid that I would be offensive. I simply don't like the way schools nowadays liberalize everything....and cram their views down your throat.....Best wishes for continued success with your program. Homeschooling is so much better these days in terms of networking, co-ops etc....

I haven't begun to homeschool yet, but I tell people that I don't like not knowing exactly what they are teaching my kids and that I don't like how the teachers get to spend more time with my kids than I do.

I homeschooled my kids for 3 years officially, but really since they were each about a year old unofficially, and still do on weekends and during vacations. I would just tell people that I did it because it at that point in our lives, I was able to stay home and homeschool them so I welcomed that chance that chance to teach them what I felt was important for them to learn.

y.

R.,

It is not necessary go into details about the reasons why you decided to home school your daughter with people who doesn't home school. Some people will understand and some others never will. One important reason and for me not to give details is to avoid hurting other mom's feelings, I decided to do it for the same reasons as yourself among others, but other mom who believes or needs to send her children to a Public School will feel or may feel she did not make a good decision or she's doing wrong (oops!), so I avoid that explanation. I just do not want to indirectly judge other moms who send their kids to regular school besides some of them are moms of my kid's friends. I am happy with my decision and my family as well, it is all that counts, so when that questions arises, I just say: "it is what works for my kids and my family, this is a family thing a family decision, the best we ever made !" However....I have been on instances where I do say that Public School is going through a bad crisis. I do say it sometimes because is so true....

Thank you for your question! I often find myself in similar situations where I feel like I start rambling because I'm trying to "explain" our decision. In reality, it's really only my husband and I who need to know why we homeschool and I should keep my answer nice and short as well. I feel like we have a lot of solid reasons for our decision but it's hard to sum up years of research and conversations (with my husband) to answer the question. I think I'll stick with "it's what's best for our family" in the future. :)

Best wishes to you and your family!

Both my mom and MIL are/were elementary teachers, and I think they would agree with you on most if not all of the issues you mentioned. Public schools do have issues, and many of those issues drive the teachers (especially the good ones) crazy because they want to help but their hands are tied by funding issues or standardized tests or limited time or parents who don't see their children's discipline problems as problems. I personally didn't find any of your responses offensive, but if you didn't want to get into your reasoning, I think "it works best for our family at this time" is a good solid catch-all that you won't have to explain further unless you want to.

I think your answer was fine. Only a teacher who knows she isn't doing her best would be offended at your answer. It doesn't sound like she was offended at your answer.

As someone who works in a public school, I am not at all offended by homeschooling. We know better than anyone the struggles public schools face!

I would just say that its the best place for my child at this time. And I really do not necessarily agree with homeschooling but I also feel it was non of the other ladies business and if she didnt want a straight answer from you she should never have asked. Dont' feel bad about your answers because they are your answers, your beliefs and you have every right to them. As for homeschooling:] As much as I get so frustrated with bullies and bad teachers. There are good teachers and good kids. I want my daughter to learn how to deal with these types now not when she's 18 and thinks that the world is a good place. Also unfotunately I've seen homeschooled kids rebel at teenage age where they run away from home and get themselves in trouble because they didnt know how to deal with the outside world. But seriously I'm not condeming you just saying my belief. But seriously don't let that teacher get your goat. I have to repeat if they didnt want an answer they didnt like they should not have asked.

My quick answer: "So we can customize our children's educations to their specific needs."

If they want details, I can give them a billion other reasons, too!

I do find that teachers tend to get more defensive about it as if we're negating the job they do, but that's their issue to deal with, not mine.