Home Schooling Next Year - No Support!

Well, I applaud your efforts! I know I could not do it myself, but have considered it. Public school can be a huge disappointment, but we work with what we have here.

If your family does not support you, find a group who will. There are tons of organizations for this now because it is becoming so popular. There are plenty of other places for your children to get their social needs met like church, sports, etc... and I know their are support systems out there for homeschooling. The internet is filled with them!

Perhaps your family is just concerned that you may become overwhelmed with all the responsibility and that you have(soon) FOUR very young children. Parenting is not the same experience for everyone, though, and you have to do what you feel is best for your children. You know them best. Stay strong!

Good luck!

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I am a 64 yr. old grandma- my oldest daughter chose to home school her four children- the two oldest now are in high school and are mostly A students. The younger ones were enrolled in school for 2 years and chose to be home schooled again. It is much easier for my daughter, and her children have had many experiences that being in school would have hindered. I just say "Listen to your heart".
L. Bradley
The Hair Gallery of Bend

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Kandice,

That is hard. I applaud you for your decision, I know I'm not the right personality to home school. The old Edmonds-Woodway High school has been turned into the Edmonds Homeschool Resource Center. I don't know if you will be able to use this or not, but this is my bit of support for you. :)

Here is the link: http://www.edmonds.wednet.edu/schools/programs/ehrc.cfm

Hope this helps,
M.

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Hi there, I'm a public school teacher and a huge advocate for public schools. However, I think it is great that you want to do what is best for your child. Every parent should feel comfortable where their child attends school and with what they're learning in the classroom. I had my own prejudices against homeschooling until I attended a board meeting where my district's homeschool network made a presentation. I was amazed at the program the district had set up to help out kids that were homeschooled. Also, since it's district aligned the kids were at or above grade level. So, I agree with the other posters. Get as much information as you can, share it with family and friends and then be happy with your decision. If things should change and the homeschooling doesn't work for you and your family that's fine you just make the adjustment. Hopefully all will go well and it will be a positive experience for you and your child. Good luck!

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If my daughter were to tell me she was thinking of home schooling but did not tell me enough information about how she was going to do it, I'd be concerned and she'd feel that my concern was disapproval. Actually we did experience a situation similar to this one. She wanted to put her daughter in a religious based private school. I asked her if the school was certified and who are the teachers and what are their credentials. She immediately became defensive. My granddaughter did not go to the school because she didn't do any reasearch and then couldn't arrange transportation. Turns out good that she didn't go. Her sister's son did go to the school for a year. They then moved and discovered that he had not been taught enough to go into the next grade level. A couple of state mandated subjects weren't even offered at the private school. His mother is now home schooling to catch him up.

I have seen several messages on this site and done some reading about home schooling. I'm aware that there are organized groups that home schooled kids use to make friends, gain in social skills and take classes such as PE. The parent or the person the parent hires to home school is not alone and relying only on their own knowledge and skills. I just recently heard of a family in which both professional parents worked who hired a nanny sort of person to also home school.

Perhaps if you gathered together some information and gave it to your family they would be more supportive. When you have a plan for how you will home school give them a copy.

Don't expect them to immediately agree with you about home schooling. Remain calm and self-assured as you talk with them over time to answer their questions. Don't react to their negative comments. I know that will be difficult. It was for me when they were coming from my daughter.

I think that you are right in not having brought up the subject again. Wait until you have more information, written by educators as well as parents who homeschool, for them.

My family almost always reacts to a new thing with a negative attitude. What has worked for me is to give them information hoping that they will come around but not expecting it. Arguing is fruitless. What will help is if you remain independant in your decision, wanting them to agree, but knowing you can do it without their approval.

I'm wondering how not having support from your family will make home schooling hard. Will they treat you and the children any differently? Are you expecting someone from your family to help you with it? Do they "preach" to you about their views? If any of these or any other obstacles are in your way, you'll want to find ways to overcome the obstacle without expecting your family to help. You can then tell them in a humble way that you have made certain arrangements and will be home schooling. Don't ask for their opinion. In fact you might say that you're not wanting their approval. You just wanted them to know that you are prepared and they will know that when you've given them a copy of your plans.

Bottom line: No arguing! Have confidence in your own plan so that you do not need their approval. If needed don't talk about the subject at all. And most importantly remember that love makes all things possible. Know that they love you even when they're angry or disapproving. And you love yourself and them in this circumstance. Love may help you make decisions that will make home schooling easier and gain your parent's approval.

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Hi,

We homeschooled our children and our families were mystified as to why we would ever do such a thing. Luckily, we had supportive friends and we were committed. Eventually, our families came to see the good that was coming out of it and it just became the norm. Our oldest is 18 and graduated now and all the kids are doing well.

We did end up putting them in school during High School and have had nothing but problems. I can't tell you how many times I have contacted teachers and counselors. It is so frustrating dealing with the school district. I'm so thankful that I avoided it for so many years. If I had the time I would still homeschool them but due to family circumstances (one of our children is disabled and needs constant care) we are unable to devote the time to homeschooling as needed.

Good luck - it is terrific to keep your kids at home. It was so fun and my kids are very thankful. My oldest said that once he went to school he stopped learning. Luckily he was way ahead of the game before we put him in school.

C.

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It's completely normal for relatives and friends to be alarmed and critical of homeschooling. Until we look into it for ourselves, all we are likely to hear are the negatives and horror stories as represented on commercial news. There's really not much substance to those stories, but that's all most people have to go on. So don't be too put off by others' alarm. They are lacking in a bigger picture that you can help make available to them. And that will take time, experience, and results.

You have control only over what you do and think (and of course to some extent what your children do and think while they're young). If other people's opinions make you feel shaky about your decision, I strongly suggest joining a local support group (you can google these).

I also suggest subscribing to one or more homeschool magazines that will support you and answer many of the "how to cope" questions that will arise for you, not only about how to deal with other people's opinions, but how to address various problems you will likely encounter as you undertake this new adventure. My husband and I advertise our science and math curriculum in several of these magazines, and I find that LIFE LEARNING and HOME SCHOOL ENRICHMENT are two well-produced magazines that operate on very different philosophies. HOME EDUCATION magazine is another that we like, that serves a very diversified audience. These are great sources of support and inspiration.

As producers of hands-on science materials, our home-based non-profit, TOPS Learning Systems, is widely used by both public school teachers AND home schoolers. We have had much contact with practitioners of both groups over decades, and I have high respect for both. And there are problems and tradeoffs with every approach (actually, home schooling breaks down into many individual approaches just within this one movement).

Let me encourage you to go for it – homeschooling could be the most wonderful thing you can ever do for your kids. And let me encourage you to keep an open mind. Not every approach works for every child. If at some point you find that homeschooling isn't working for you or your children, I hope you will give public or private school a second look. A different year, a different teacher, or a different school can make a world of difference.

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I homeschooled my oldest all the way through graduation, my other 2 until 8th grade. There are lots of resources available for disagreeing family members. It's almost 10:00 and my brain is nearly off, so I will send you a link to a wonderful website that can quell all of your fears and your families too:
www.hslda.org
They are a legal support group for homeschoolers. They helped put into place many of the existing laws that allow homeschooling. They have been helping homeschoolers for over 20 years.
Let me know if you have more questions. I can answer you when I am awake!
B.

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I am with you all the way!! I have decided I would rather teach my children what I think it is important for them to know rather then throw them to the wolves of the public school system(not commenting on the teachers..rather just the system itself). My mom and sister have been pushing the whole getting my three year old into preschool next year thing with me. I have been just telling them I am thinking about it. Finally I got tired of it and told them I didnt need them to look into anything for me because I was going to homeschool him for preschool and everything else! They both are just flabbergasted that I would even try. They think I am just trying to keep him to myself and not let him socialize...I plan on getting him into a tumbling class or something for that but I would rather be in control of his learning...Really what is it too them anyways, right?? Its not like we are asking them to stop what they are doing and teach them!! Anyways I support your decision and I think more parents should back up moms and dads who choose to do this!! Good luck and Good Teaching!!

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Check out www.homeEDdirectory.com. This is a home schooler directory.

There are SO many people home schooling that you can find all kinds of help and support. Half the people in my church home school. You just make sure that you get a ciriculum and stick with it. There are so many curiculum available, the choices are overwhelming. Be very consistent and it has to be top priority. Our Priest's wife home schools and she is working in conjuction with Montessori, and other educational areas as well.

I encourage you to go ahead with it. The public school systems on their web sites also have resources listed for home schooling. Find other parents who are doing so. It's been something I've always wanted to do, but time constraints stop me.

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I love the idea of homeschooling (and I'm a public school teacher)! There are so many things that I philosophically disagree with sometimes in public school. I wish I had the resources/opportunity to be able to homeschool! Kudos to you! Also, don't worry too much about your family not giving you the support you need. You and your husband are the best judges for your immediate family. Hopefully they will see all the benefits in the future. Good Luck to you!

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Check out this page, http://www.jaredstory.com/homeschool.html - 11 reasons home schools are better than public schools.
My family felt the same as yours and my husband barely supported me, but after they could see the diference in the behavior of my children (some were stressed out and others were bullied), they relaxed and accepted it. My sister, who had bad mouthed me the most, even homeschooled her son a few years later.
My kids turned out well too. My oldest got an Associates Degree, my second is finishing up a Master's Degree and my youngest daughter is about to get her Bachelor's Degree.

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Hello,
I have three boys and have been homeschooling all three for five years now. I love it. Support is a must from your spouse and it helps when your family is supportive too, however that often isn't the case.
My family was very unsupportive of the idea for the first few years but, they are all slowly becoming more supportive each year that goes by. As they see how well my children are doing and as they hear the problems other kids are having in public school, the more supportive they get.
Homeschooling mom's tend to get a lot of critisizm. You will hear about everywhere you go. Everyone has an opinion and everyone thinks they have the answer.
Just hang in there. It will get easier. The fruit of your labor will begin to prove them all wrong. I also want to encourage you in the homeschooling process. It's not easy at first, but really stick it out. It gets easier each year as you establish a routine and your child begins to realize that this is school and you are the teacher.
As I said before, I've been homeschooling for five years and this was our best year yet. I really felt like we finally got it down this year. So the key is to make a long term commitment and stick it out. You will see results that are worth all the hard work, crtitisizm, and headaches.
Best of luck to you. Should you have any questions please feel free to ask. I would love to share support and ideas.

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Hi KJ,
Give me a call if you'd like to chat about this by phone.
###-###-#### This is exactly what I do for a living.
I work with many homeschoolers to give them academic support through tutoring in small groups or one-on-one. Whatever you are running into with your relatives can be handled by giving them more information about homeschooling-both the legal aspects and the wonderful opportunities that homeschooling allows.
They would probably feel better if they knew how many homeschoolers there are in this state (about 20,000) and if they knew how great homeschool kids turn out later. They do get accepted at great colleges, in fact most of them go through the Running Start program in their high school years which means they graduate from high school and get their 2 year degree from a community college at the same time. (that means two years earlier than kids in the public schools. It's a great way to go and I can back you up and help you get their support. You can also visit the WHO website which stands for Washington Homeschool Organization.
L. Lawson of Lawson Tutoring and Homeschool Enrichment.

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Have you heard about www.connectionsacademy.com ?
It's actually a public school program that allows you to "homeschool" but with the help of a teacher. your child is assigned a teacher that you keep in contact with by phone and email and they design all of the assignments specifically for your child and email them to you. They also grade everything for you and you can connect with them if you need help teaching certain things. As the parent, you're actually considered the "coach" and not the teacher...you just guide your child's teaching but the assigned teacher does most of the work.
The best part? It's free because it's a public school program!!!
I'm planning on using it when my oldest turns kindergarten age.

It might really help you out.
Good luck!

S.
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I am a math instructor at a local community college and some of my best students are home schooled students that have gotten beyond the skill level of their parents in Math. I have considered home schooling myself, but don't think that it will be possible since I will have to continue working to maintain finances. The idea that my child will be able to move at their own pace is what makes homeschooling an intriguing option. In school I was always bored moving at a pace that was too slow for me so I just seemed to float on through, but my husband on the other hand was a little slower in some topics and was removed from class to help him with those. He always hated being pulled out from class because of the stigma as well as missing other things that he would have to make up later. These are some points that you can hopefully share with your family to help ease concerns, but this is ultimately your decision and you have to trust that you know what is best for your child.

If I have noticed any skills lacking with home schooled students it is some of their social skills, and the ability to work well in group situations. I think that if you go in knowing the weaknesses, and have solutions than homeschooling is a great option if you can do it. We have a cousin that is homeschooling her 4 children, and they have a great group of friends that they work with. Once a month they get together for a field trip that one parent has planned. They have gotten to do so many neat things as well as giving the children some group time to work on social skills in a group setting.

Hope this helps, and that you enjoy homeschooling your children. Another thing I know from my cousin is that they get some special membership at the library so they can keep books longer and check out more at one time. Also I believe they get a discount at Learning Palace to help buy homeschooling supplies.

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I just started homeschooling my son this year. You just have to decide what is best for your children and family and go with it (even if others are negative). It may help to talk about it in ways that can help to create some understanding (even if you don't get a response or get a negative one). For example, I would talk about how great it was for my son to be able to work at his own level. He is able to focus easier at home and get a lot done quickly. After awhile, other family members may start to see the positive as well.

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I had this exact, same problem when we decided to homeschool our oldest (who is just finishing 2nd grade). Last year (his 1st grade year) was our first year. I love it! However, while my side of the family was fine with it (I have lots of cousins who are homeschooled), my husband's side (namely mom-in-law)was *not* thrilled. (She works as a teacher's aid in special ed-go figure!) At first, she would tell me what the 1st grade teachers were teaching at her school, almost as if she expected me to panic. The thing is, we were right on target, if not past where she said they were. I think she finally caught on that homeschooling was a good thing when our son started reading EVERYTHING, I mean, things that even third and fourth graders struggled with (this was last year, and he's only improved)I think it's due to the fact that he gets one-on-one that just *does not* happen in the public school.

My husband and I were determined to homeschool our son, so we really didn't care what others thought. Although, at first, I just wanted to prove my mom-in-law wrong-and I did! LOL!

A good cirriculum is Bob Jones University. It's so easy to follow along! Bascially, it tell you what to do and say and what pages the child should do in the given subjects. This is a Christian-based cirriculum, but still has lots of info, even if that's not your religion.

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