Potty Training Problem - Murfreesboro,TN

B.,

I remember having the same problem with my youngest son. He will be 4 tomorrow. I had to try different things. The thing that worked the best was to tell him to go make a snake in the potty. He still yells from the potty "Mommy, I made a snake." I can't help but laugh. He has only gone poopy in his pants one time from that moment. Try that. Worked great for me. Remember the first couple of times I had to come and look at his HUGE SNAKE and make a really big deal about it.

Hi, B.. Don't know if you are still having a problem with this. If you are, maybe my story can help. It was at the age of three. Our 4 and a half year old, who was then 3 and a half, was potty trained going pee and we were working on the poop end of things. Sometimes he would go and sometimes he wouldn't. We rewarded him every time he did something in the potty. He would do great some times and then fall back, way back. When it got to the point of him going in his underpants all the time, and not big stuff, it was little runny stuff, which we couldn't understand because he hadn't gone for a couple of days - so he really should have a good bowel movement. No go. Finally he would go and it would hurt - understandably. I called the ped's office. Normal for some kids to go every couple of days is what they said. If it continued to be a problem for him or go longer than a couple of days we needed to come in and have him be seen. We ended up in the doctor's office the very next week. Long story short, it's called soiling. They hold the poop in, for whatever reason, and the only stuff that comes out is the stuff that's loose enough to get past the big stuff that can't come out. Our son was so bad he was impacted and he had lost control of the muscle which pushes the poop out. No wonder it hurt to go poop and no wonder he couldn't go poop! Our ped's treatment for him was this: We had to do three junior enemas (no kidding, it took that many to get him cleaned out), and he's been on Miralax ever since. Absolutely no pressure about going poop in the potty. We didn't even talk about it but one time after he was cleaned out. Told him he had to teach the poop to come out. The poops job was to come out and go to the poop party (it worked for us). Oh, it was slow going at first. We put him back into pull ups, wore them all the time. He even back slided all together with going to the potty. I thought it would never end. I had to put him on the potty every hour that he was awake to train his brain to train the poop to come out, for 5 minutes a pop. If he went great, if he didn't - no problem. Lots of times nothing would happen in the potty and I would put the pull up on and then it would come out. We had to come to grips with the fact that it didn't matter where he went poop (pull up or potty) as long as he went, daily! It has taken a year and I am so thankful to say that he is fully potty trained! He does everything in the bathroom all by himself! It was frustrating at times because you want him to go in the potty so bad instead of changing pull ups or underpants all the time. Knowing that his body had a problem and it needed time to heal kept me from becoming extremely frustrated. It wasn't his fault. Don't push and pressure kids to use the potty; when they are ready they will. Pressuring them and threatening them or taking things away from them because they don't use the potty will only make it worse - I speak from experience. Praise them for any small amount that ends up in the toilet. We even praised him and rewarded him when he pooped in his pull up! Talk with your ped and find out what the best thing is for your child. What worked for us might not be what will work for your child. You will have great days and then bad days. Don't let the bad days get to you. A kind talk with Alex should help. Let him know you aren't mad at him, that it's OK to poop in the pull up (underwear just got too messy for us during this time and I was constantly doing laundry). Tell him he is a big boy and it's his job to teach the poop to come out. Then let it go. Don't keep hammering it into the ground (that was hard for daddy). The more you don't talk about it - the more he will go in the potty. Remember to praise, praise, praise! We would call daddy at work and tell him and be so excited when we called. When everyone was home they got called into the bathroom to see the poop! It's been a journey.

ok what sadastic ped tell you to get your kid and enama, thats just wrong.

have you tried making him clean up the mess? when you find poo make him clean it up and put it in the potty. make a big deal about how gross it is to not do it in the potty adn about what a mess it is. also try a reward chart. every time he poos in the potty he gets a sticker on the chart at the end of the week if he gets something he really wants. take him to the store and let him pick something out.

Sometimes a child just has to be ready to go. He was ready to pee in the potty, but for some reason it seems pooping in the potty is scary. My son did the same thing. He actually seemed to enjoy peeing in the potty, but pooping took a long time to get. Maybe if you let him know that it's ok to poo in his diaper he won't try to hide it anymore. Just wait for him to be ready, and it'll be easier for you. Try pullups, they're easy to clean up, and semi-easy for him to pull down to go to the bathroom. Good luck.

Hi B., I have a 2 1/2 year old boy. We finally got him potty trained and he does not go at night either. I would suggest a very severe punishment for playing with poopy. That is very dangerous for his and your health. Second, we offered rewards to our son also who did not want to poopy in the potty. None worked until he found some money and he has amusical piggy bank that he loves to play with. He only gets to play with the musical piggy bank with money if he went in the potty. We made a very big deal about it the first time he went in the potty. We called grandparents and other relatives to give him praise. That actually worked better than our praise and the piggy bank. I really hope this helps. K.

Hi B.,
My response is a little different from the others, but I think it might work. Put him back in diapers. I know this sounds a bit strange, but he needs to understand that going peepee in the potty is only part of being potty trained. People that wear underwear put both peepee and poopoo in the potty. If he is ready to do that (and I am guessing that he is fully capable, just not willing) then he needs to wear diapers until he decides that he is.
When you do that, don't get mad if he doesn't go in the potty, just keep reminding him that he will get his big kid underwear back when he is ready.
I would no longer go on poopy hunts, etc.
He is in charge of his own body.

I dont see how enema is sadistic, its safer than having a 2 yr old clean up his own poop lady. Shes alread said shes made a big deal out of it and the child is hiding it b/c of that so he doesnt maker her mad. I say just explain it to him and be supportive.

Hmmm...You may have resolved this already but if not, have you tried putting the potty chair in his room? When we introduced my youngest to the potty chair, we kept it in the living room which is where he spent most of his time playing. You could tell him to go in the potty chair and then he can "hide" it by closing the lid. Let me know how it goes....

Pull ups are a good idea to try. But like some said, they child has to be ready to poopy in the potty. It is scary for them to see it in the potty. From personal experience, if you make too big of a deal when they do wrong, it does scare them to hide it from you. Explain to your child that an oopsy is ok, but he is a big boy so he needs to try to use the potty like a big boy. As far as getting him to clean up the poopy. HECK NO!!! Please don't do this. Both my boys have "tried" to clean up before I could find it. Believe me, it made it a lot worse. Hope this helps, A.

Hi B.. First off, I am confused about some of the comments that were left by other people. Someone said something about an enema, but I didn't see that you said anything about that. I'm a little confused on that one. Anyway, I don't really know what to tell you because my son is only 16 months old, and we haven't come across this type of problem yet. Have you called his pediatrician? I wouldn't suggest that you make him clean it up. That could become more of a problem than a lesson. All I can tell you is to just be patient with him. Put him in some pull-ups, and if he plays with his poopy explain firmly to him that this is a dangerous thing, and punish him by maybe taking his favortie toy away, or going to bed earlier. Try as best as you can to make him understand that this is not a good thing that he is doing. I hope this helps. I can't even imagine what you must be going through! Keep your chin up...he'll get it eventually. :)

Hello B., well I don't know if you are still having any problems with Alex and potty training but may I give you some advice in case you still need it. You have to sorta poopy train yourself and then Alex will become so too. In other words, except the night time accidents, as soon as he wakes up then take and put him on the potty and make him sit there for a while and if that doesn't work then try again in about 30 minutes and you have to keep it up until he gets the idea and hang of it! good luck.................. D.