Potty Training Advice Needed! - Brighton,MI

My one major piece of advice is to ignore that last person. Making a child sit in their mess, or even a dog, is WRONG!!! And hitting them, as like hitting an animal, is WRONG!! And belittling a child and telling them they are a baby is WRONG!! Please please don't listen to that last person, they are nuts.

Advice...maybe lock the spare room? Reward her for going on the toilet, my brother and sister in law give one M & M for pee and two for poops. I used to use stickers and now if she is dry all day, she gets two bedtime stories and a sucker when she leaves her daycare. Maybe she needs a kids potty seat instead of the big one. And she is only 2 and a half, so she is still really young and it could really be that she is just not ready. If she does go on the floor, she should help clean it up.

Is she per chance standing in front of a mirror to do this? She may like the way she can see what's happening. I would either lock the door to the room (if there is one) and if there isn't a door then I would take a potty chair in there and have her stand over the chair. Maybe put a plastic tablecloth under the chair and have her clean up the mess she makes. Eventually the novelty will wear off. It sounds to me like she's looking for a reaction and she's getting it. You could also possibly have your brother put a long mirror in front of the bathroom toilet so she can see herself in there instead. She needs to have an interest in making it into the bathroom again. Clean itup if she misses and a big reward if she makes it. Possibly use phrasing such as "You make me feel bad when you don't use the toilet like a big girl. Only animals pee on the carpet and you are not an animal" may work, too.

Good luck - I have three boys and using the toilet for target practice and making bubbles worked wonders for me. :o)

S.

Maybe it would help your brother to get a perspective on this if he viewed this as a discipline matter and not a potty-training matter. Treat the behavior for what it is, a negative behavior that deserves a consequence. Right now there is now consequence. She screams because she wants to do what she wants, and going in the bathroom isn't what she wants, she wants to do what is funny to her. If there is a consequence to it, it own't be funny to her anymore. Think like a 2 year old, which is not one that takes steps to reason, it's more of a 1-2 shot. Hope this helps!

I have been going through the same type of behavior over the past few months with my 3 yr old and it has been since we told him that I was having another baby. We decided to start a new calendar for him and give him a big sticker on it for every day that he doesn't have an accident and a small sticker if he has one accident in his pants. If he pees on the floor he gets nothing for the day. When he gets 7 in a row we take him to Chuck E Cheese to play games. This has been working and he has earned one trip to CEC already. They seem to respond well to rewards systems. Now we are doing a separate calendar for getting him to eat his dinner but I don't know what reward that one is going to entail yet. For now he is satisfied with the stickers...lol.

Good luck to your brother!

Have they tried negotiation. I read this article on potty training stubborn children and they said it gets the child more interested in the process if there's something in it for them. Try treating her with a prize when she uses the potty right. But keep whatever you give her in the bathroom. If you give her a sucker, don't give her any suckers unless she goes properly. Another thing you could do along with treating her is, when she goes on the carpet, don't react. Cause as we all know, children only do things like that for attention. Instead of telling her no! like she did something wrong, say something like, "Uh- oh, did you have an accident, ok let's see if you need to go more." and take her to the bathroom. Maybe if they don't make a big deal about it, she won't wanna do it anymore cause she can't get a rise out of them.
I hope this helps, let me know how it goes.

My son used to do that all over the house but in places you would not notice -like he used to pee down the furnance duct work into the basement! He also had bowel movements in his pants or in unusual places (like the lawn). We found he used to fear the toilet so maybe she has a fear of it. Try using a childs small tiolet and put it where she is comfortable with it. Patience is key.Also 28 months is still pretty young -it is best to wait till the child is ready.

A. A, sorry to here that your brothers daughter is troubled, nice he feels he can come to you for advice. While my daughter was in day care everything is timed, play, outside, snacks, and yes toliet, limit drinks, and start taking her to the bathroom, until she goes, do this consistintly, at the same time everyday. I would also put a mirror close to the floor in spare room where she is doing the behaivior, some things seem funny but not when we see ourselves. Girls especially like to choose clothing, not aloud when you may use the bathroom on yourself. She can only wear old clothes, not her favorite outfits. Sounds to me like a control issue, so best not to over react to the problem, even bad behavior gets attention, do not talk about it that much, children don't need so much information, ie why do I have to go potty after I drink my juice, don't say because you urinate on the floor, just a new rule. Your brother & his wife and King & Queen of their castle, someday she will have her own castle, and she can make up all the rules. Best of luck to you, and your family.

I would make her try and clean it up, then tell her that she can not go in that room anymore because she is peeing on the floor. I would also not take her directly into the bathroom, I would put her directly in time out then talk to her about why she is in time out. I would also pay closer attention to when she is headed for that room and redirect her directly into the bathroom.

My concern would be:
What happened to her to cause such an abrupt behavior to surface?
Or
What happened in that room or the bathroom?
This is where I would start.
???

Of course put the diaper back on...with duct tape if she tries to take it off. Obviously she has gotten tjust what she wanted, attention and now knows it works!!

I have tried to give advise onthis issue before. I tried to potty train my eldest but with four child born in five years he reverted and I changed my tactics.

I neve pooty trained a child again! they just use their bowels to control us!

take them with you to buy the underpats ( only three ), unwrape andafter showing them to the child put them on a high shelf. Now the hard part...no negotiating... they get their diaper off and get on the toliet , without any help. The call you to be wiped ( at first but hen you let them try) . They ten put the same diaper back on. When the diaper has been dry for three weeks 9 day and night0) then you let them wear the underpants for a few hours at a time. They must know that this is a privelege and not someothing YOU are taking the creidt for ( so often parents love to bag ' my child was potty trained at ___age) . Why does so much of what they do have to belong to us???

Of course they cannot go to certain preschools if in a diaper etc. and you may feel as if the other parents think you are not a good parent etc. but in the end you child will NOT be screwed up. I often meet certain adults and wonder about their potty training experience.

Some children are ready sooner than other. many are terrified of that huge white porclain thing that 'eats' thngs...like maybe them?? It looks small to us but huge to them...and often scary.those parent who let thier children watch them go tot he bathorrom can also create another problem as the men are obviously larger than the child and all of us have 'hair ' that they don't. identity crisis???

Best of luck. be firm and don't make it all about YOU

A.; wow crazy , i would not know what to do except lock the door, to bedrooms, and keep bathroom door open, put the lock up high in the door, so she cant undo it, or just close the door for now, and get a knob sercurity object so she cant open the door, also when she starts to go into the bedroom , i would grab her and take her into the bathroom, just keep being consistant, and keep up the good, work, congrats on having her potty trained at such a young age too, mine didnot finish till they were 4, but i hear girls get it done faster, either way , tell your brother to keep up the good work, have a good day D. s