Potty Issues!

L., I had a HARD time getting my son to go on the potty AT all. He kept saying he was scared. He had the potty seat a lil potty. He just wouldnt do it. It became very stressful for me. I was sooo worried he would be 4 and not be able to go to preschool. I just gave up. I heard the when they are ready they will go thing lol. SO after about a week of giving up, I thought ah well maybe he will be in diapers for the rest of his life LOL. I started a new job (havent worked in 4 yrs) THAT Same exact night My 1st day he told his older sister he had to go, they went potty and hes been going ever since. Hasnt had any accidents. except when he was sick with the flu! So .. I truely believe when they are ready they will go and be done with it! Maybe dont suggest the pooing in the potty for a lil while and see what he comes up with! GL!!!

I've heard some people say the child is afraid they are losing something that belongs to them, maybe reminding him how dirty it is to go pooh and how you don't like to clean it up and how much time it would save him if he went on the potty then he would be done and could play just like peeing. With my son, we used peer pressure. We showed him that his best friends at school (preschool) were going poop on the potty and not in their pants, and they did it all on their own. We told him it made us (me and his teachers) sad that he didn't do it. He asked about all his friends...each by name...and even asked them...the very next day he sat up on his cot at nap time and said "I have to go poop" walked right in and went. We haven't had a problem since. He potty trained at 3 1/2 with peeing and it took another 3 months for the pooping but he's got it down now. He is also a very caring person...so the fact that it hurt someone elses feelings made a difference. I know some people say not to use it...but use what works with your child...

I know how frustrating it is, but really your doctor is right. When you son is really ready, you'll know. The absolute worst thing that you can do is force the issue as it will turn it into a battle. If you know when he has to go..by all means...encourage, comfort and get him to sit on the potty. You have to show him that you are still boss and he needs to do as you say, but when he is ready to get up, let him without too much fight. One day he will surprise himself by actually going in the potty...then praise him like crazy!

One of my daughters had a lengthy hospital stay. It was right during when potty training normally should occur. Needless to say there were other more important issues on which we had to focus so potty training was not high on our priority list. During the hospital stay, she had started holding her bowel movements. She would go 2 to 3 days without going. This is where the term "anal retentive" comes from. It usually occurs in children as in my daughter's case...she was in the hospital, had little or no control as to what doctors or nurses were doing to her body so she chose to "control" her bowel movements. The reason that I mention this is that I did have to actually make her sit on the potty, comfort her and encourage her to go. Though it was heartbreaking as a mom to go through...eventually she started going regularly with no problem and she was potty trained.

There is light at the end of this tunnel. Keep up the good work, mom!

My one daughter was the same way. What I did was when I could tell she was going to poop I put her on the potty with her favorite stuffed animal and forced her to stay there while I comforted her and let her know it was going to be ok. This was definitely one of those tough love situations b/c she was so upset. She was terrified but once she did it I encouraged her by saying that it wasn't as bad as she thought and she agreed. I really praised her a lot for doing something she was afraid of and being couragous. She never went in her underwear again. GOOD LUCK!

Hi L.!
My name is B. and I'm from Zanesville,OH. Wow...I can really relate to your dilemma! I run a daycare and I have a little boy who turned 4 in December. He WILL NOT pooh in the potty but has been peeing in the potty for quite some time now. His parents and I have tried everything....and her Dr. told her the same thing, "He'll do it when he's ready." We've tried giving rewards and everything... to no avail. I don't really have any magic advice but did want to let you know that you're not the only one going through this!

This may not work for you, but my sister had major issues with potty training her son. He's been going to preschool for a couple of years, and his teachers were supposed to be helping with potty training him, but I'm not sure how much they were doing. He got comfortable wearing a Pull-up, which had a negative effect on him. He didn't care if he was sitting in his poop or not. He managed to learn how to pee in the potty, okay, but my sister still had problems trying to get him to go poop in the potty almost right up to his 4th birthday. Both my sister abd nephew live with my parents, so my mom also tried to help as much as possible with potty training. They decided that the next time his Pull-ups ran out, they wouldn't buy anymore, and he'd have to start wearing regular underwear. Mom told me that one day a couple of weeks before his birthday he asked for another Pull-up (I think she and my sister warned him several times about the switch before it happened), and Mom said that there were no more and he'd have to start using the potty and wearing big boy underwear. Apparently it worked because he never had an accident in his underwear. As far as I know, he didn't have accidents in his sleep, either. His body was ready for him to control his urges to go, but he was just being lazy and not stopping his activities to try to go to the bathroom while in the Pull-ups. This may be too abrupt for your son, but it might work, too.

I feel like I've tried everything as well with our 4-year old. We ended up taking him to the Behavior Clinic at Children's and were so surprised to get some great ideas we'd never thought of before. (i.e. For us - using pretend play to help our son understand that the potty is a part of life, letting him drink throughout the day to help him regulate his own drinking/peeing/pooping habits, etc.)

Dr. Thomasguard is fantastic and doesn't make you feel like something's 'wrong' with your child, he just helps you understand your child a bit better. I would highly recommend going when you feel like there's nothing else working!

Our daughter is due any day - so we felt a sense of urgency with this as well!

Hang in there!

T.

This is not something I would do unless desperate because it is akin to bribery, but something my friend did when she was facing her son's 4 year old birthday with potty issues was tell him that if he wanted a birthday party at Chuck E Cheese then he had to use the potty for both pee and poop because that is what big boys do and Chuck E Cheese does not allow parties for 4 year olds that don't use the potty. He was so motivated by wanting his party at Chuck E Cheese that he got into the potty swing of things before his birthday. This worked for her, but it may not work for others. It depends on the personality of the child.

My 2 year old son will be three in September and he will sit on the potty with his diaper on but rarely asks to use it otherwise. He has peed in it twice and I am not pushing it. I have another in diapers still and when she is ready to potty train I think both of them will be done pretty quick. I HOPE!

I too am in the same exact boat. My son's story is the same. He'll be 4 in June and won't go on the toilet, only pull-ups. What to do?

Funny that you are expecting your second named Cameron, just named my little girl born in November that, and I too am going to school online to be a nurse at CSCC.

We were worried that it would take forever to train my son. But, we started with getting rid of the diapers. We talked about it for almost a week. Letting him know that when the diapers ran out, he wasn't getting anymore. Finally, they ran out & we started with underpants. Peeing took only 3 days. Pooping took longer, maybe 2 weeks. Bribery works. There's nothing wrong with it. We found out (through trial & error) that my son LOVES gummy dinosaurs. They are called "Daddy's candy" for obvious reasons. He got 2 treats everytime he pooped on the potty. I think that it took us the 2 weeks to find that one object that he loved & would "work" for. Find a thing that your son values & use it as a reward system. I personally don't think that humiliation & embarrassment are the way to get kids to do anything. All they want to do is please us & be able to take pride in their accomplishments.