Pack N Play or Co-sleeping

Hi L.-

I am currently nursing my second who was born in September and is nearly 12 weeks now. I have pretty much repeated the process I did with my dughter who is now 2 yo. We nursed until she was about 14 or 15 months and I have tried as hard as possible to always put them down in their own space however this may not always be possible as described below...

I am a nurse-on-demand kind of mother so whenever our baby boy starts "rooting", sucking on his hands or crying and its been a few hours from the last session, we nurse. Of course, I check all the other usual suspects too like dirty diaper or boredom. (Yes, even a little one can get bored!)

For the first 8 weeks, I kept a pack n' play set up in the "craddle" position in the living room on the first floor. This was because nursing has always seems to put my kids to sleep so it was easier to put him down in a safe location near me and my daughter and not have to run upstairs to the nursery where I could not see or hear him. In our bedroom, we would use a wooden cradle that my belongs to the family and hubby refinished for me. I set the rocking chair right next to it so I could nurse there and place him immediately down in the cradle. My rocker is set up like a "nest". I have my fuzziest housecoat available and a blanket that I wrap around me and the nursing infant. I also use a breast-friend nursing pillow to raise the baby up to chest level. I found that he liked being placed in a warm location so I kept a heating pad nearby and would throw that in it on the lowest setting while we were nursing to keep the space warm. I ALWAYS removed the pad prior to putting him down. He didn't need that after a few weeks though. I did make sure to put him down on a blanket that had been tucked in under the mattress as I find the hard cotton sheets are too cool to the touch and wake him up.

Now, this process initially is not easy and it takes a real commitment. Since my husband works shift work as a nurse I sometimes had to leave our bedroom with the baby. I would usually go to the spare bedroom (which is a double bed) and co-sleep with our son. I tried not to allow this to be an every night kind of thing and some nights, when he was sleeping well after a fussy spurt, I would return to my bedroom and place him into the cradle - with the goal being that he always be in his own space. I almost always avoided co-sleeping in the bed with my husband. I think a co-sleeping Mom is more aware and knows that baby is there when a spouse may not and accidentally roll over on the baby.

After thanksgiving, we moved our son (about 10 weeks old) to the nursery and a real crib. He had out-grown the cradle as his arms would hit the sides and wake him up. I still retrieve him from the nursey to nurse in the rocker nest. I use an audio baby monitor when he needs attention.

My advise for night nursing is keep it low key. Use motion sensored lights to keep the light level down and try to minimize the amount of waking up that occurs.

As for the pack n' play, I LOVE ours. If you travel or visit folks without kids, this was the best place to put our daughter and now our son. We purchased it used on ebay and have not regretted it what-so-ever. We used it in the hotel we stayed at for my kid borther's wedding and again for a family trip to VA and this does not include the numerous trips to the family shore house. I really like having it.

Best wishs and welcome to the ranks!
~C.

2 moms found this helpful

When my daughter was born, we'd be up all night mostly due to my insistence that she be put into her crib at night. Then a nurse at my weekly new parent morning meetings suggested I read Dr. Sears' "Nighttime Parenting". It saved my sanity.

I highly recommend you read that book. It gives pros and cons to many options.
We decided co-sleeping was the way to go and when my son was born it was never a question.
Co-sleeping has been the way things were done throughout the world up until the industrial revolution. Many societies still predominantly co-sleep.

Just like children can be weaned from the breast, they can be weaned from the bed.

1 mom found this helpful

I need to put my vote in for no co-sleeping. I think it's the trend now to do that to make things easier and to bond with your child, but I meet too many moms whose children are 4-5 YO and stilllllll sleeping with them. There is a middle ground though. I was lucky that my husband would bring her to me in the middle of the night sometimes, and sometimes stay with her in the living room at night if she was having a rough night and I needed sleep. I had a rough delivery, so I would sometimes pump and give the milk to him. Anyway, our daughter never slept with me, and even though I sometimes wish I had it, I know that's my own desire. She is a great crib pack/play sleeper and loves her bed. I have a wonderful close relationship with her and I never slept with her. She looks forward to her night routine and we don't regret a thing. If you do choose co-sleeping, make sure you wean out of it before a year when babies start to be more aware of their surroundings and get attached to sleeping with you. It'll also be good for your marriage too. Even the best husband wants to have you to himself at night. Also, get teh bjorn travel light crib instead of the pack in play...

1 mom found this helpful

There is so much trial and error being a first time mom, but the one thing I always feel I did "right" was letting my baby learn to fall asleep on her own at a young age. I put a co-sleeper on my side of the bed for the first month, which puts the baby at arms reach, easy for breast feeding, but not in danger of falling off the bed or getting crushed! After 5 or 6 weeks the frequency of her night feedings slowed down, and I put her in her crib. Little more work for you, but she has been a self soother ever since. No laying down with her for 45 minutes at bed time (she is two now) I feel like it really paid off.

1 mom found this helpful

Go with the co-sleeper. Very convenient and can be right next to your bed. It turns into a Pack and Play - which is terrific for traveling later on - or putting them in another room to sleep. Crib upstairs/pack n play downstairs.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

In my opinion, co-sleeping is the best overall, BUT ONLY IF ALL MEASURES HAVE BEEN CAREFULLY TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT. This means you and your partner have to feel confident that you can do this (it'll "download" into your subconscious and you're body will know the tiny baby is there so there's no risk of rolling onto it), you and your husband both are non-smokers, you don't drink, and you have prepared your bed for the infant next to you. Make sure your bed is nice and taut with sheets, don't use fluffy covers and lots of blankets (the baby will be warm against you), and have a barrier on your side of the bed.

Personally I co-sleep. It's been the best for me and wouldn't do it any other way. IF you want to do it and you have taken all the precautions, it's the best for the baby as well. Many people who don't like to do it generally say the same thing - that it'll take a while for the child to grow out of it. My view is, even if it does take 3 or 4 years for the child to start sleeping in their own bed, isn't the well-being and benefit to the child worth just 4 short years of yours and your partner's life? Four years goes by in a flash and I put in all my effort, challenging or not, for the benefit of my kid.

Research shows that co-sleeping helps the baby's immune system grow stronger faster, it regulates the baby's breathing, and both mother (esp if breastfeeding) and baby will sleep more soundly when their rhythms coincide together making it an easier night for everyone. Countries where most mothers and babies sleep together have lower SIDS rates.

Again, all the above is true only if you know you want to do this and are confident this is the right thing for you. Your baby will definitely love it!

Good luck and congrats.

-MaryAnne.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi L.,
I know how easy and comfortable it is to co-sleep with your little one while nursing. I did this with my first, and had a hard time getting her into her own crib at a year old.

With my second, she stayed in her crib. I would take her out to change her and nurse her, then put her right back into her crib- my sister-in-law found me a glider crib the glided sideways (it was great, but I got rid of it before I'd had my 3rd). I did the same with my 3rd, until he started sharing a room with his sisters, and I didnt want him to wake them, we began co sleeping and had to fight getting him into his crib after we moved to a bigger place.

With my last, I had a glider chair. I would take her out of her crib, change her, nurse her and glide, then put her back into her crib, where she stayed without a problem. We did occasionally co-sleep, but not often.

That was my experience- it is nice to have that closeness with co sleeping, but its harder to get the little ones out of it when you want a change. Try to keep co sleeping to the occasional nap together.

Good luck

a newborn is never safe in the bed. find an attachable sleeper for your bed. you'll need the pack n play for having a safe place for him to be when you are trying to get anything done and he's crawling or walking; or for when you visit others and need to put him somewhere.... a pack n play is not a waste of money. (mother of 3, 5 and under)

Co-sleeping never worked for us. My husband worked very odd hours and would be in and out of the bed often during the night depending on what day it was. I used a bassinet in my bedroom for my babies when they were new, then moved them to a crib in their own bedroom as they outgrew the bassinet. I bottle fed all 5 of my babies. But I never fed them in my bed. I always went to the living room couch or chair. I fed the babies, changed them and put them back in their beds to fall asleep then went back to my own bed to get a sound sleep myself. All of them learned to fall asleep on their own and would sleep thru the night by the time they were 2 months old. BTW My kids are all grown now (ages 27-39) and have kids of their own and all used the same sleeping method with no problems.

As for the pack n play. I wish they had them when my kids were little. All we had were the big clunky playpens. I suggest you get a pack n play even if you don't use it for the baby to sleep in. You will use it for so many other things. Like visiting grandma.

Hi! Congratulations! Being a mom is both exciting and scary! My children are 20, 9 and 5. The first two slept in a crib, in their own room, from the 1st day they came home from the hospital. There where no issues, no problems with night time feeding etc... Now for #3. Being the first two were boys, I had a soft spot for my little princess. She spent a few nights at first in her crib, in her room. Then I went to a bassinet beside my bed, because she would cry. If I rubbed her back she would fall aslept. Then came the big mistake... not to long after that, I had her sleeping in our bed. What a wonderful cozing feeling. The closeness is fabulous, but at 5 she is STILL in my bed!!!! I can't get her OUT! This is my last, so I am rather easy about. I do not mind too much, but it does get in the way, if you know what I mean...
Also the issue about co sleeping is the danger to the infant. Blankets, pillows, bodies can be pushed up against the face of the baby, and block the baby from breathing. you must be extreme careful and aware, if your infant sleeps with you. I must say, that a good night sleep does not happen for a long time, especially when you co sleep. I know for me I was very aware my baby was in bed with me, so I did not sleep sound at all. With the baby in a bassinet, you can sleep without to many worries. I think a pack n play serves the same purpose as a crib, but the mattress(bottom) would not be as comfortable as a crib or bassinet.
Good luck! You will get alot of opinions on this topic. do What you are comfortable with when the time comes. you will know!!!!

L.,

Congratulations! That's wonderful! February, not far off!

Co-sleeping is not a bad thing. You'll be told it is. You will find that you will lose less sleep and your baby will have a more prompt response resulting in less crying and less wakefulness, and more uninterrupted sleep for both of you. You will be told a lot of stuff, and you will have to learn how to sift from the traditional/mainstream and what works for your family.

If you want more information on co-sleeping (and how to end it if it doesn't work for you) go to Attachment Parenting International. They have a whole article on what (and what not) to do.

Pack and Play is not a waste of $ though! I put one in the cellar in the laundry so I can have hands free and he can have a place to stand that is clean (originally so he could be there and see me :) We sing while I launder and now we count how long it takes to get back to toys. :)

One very helpful source on breastfeeding:
http://breastfeedingonline.com/newman.shtml
Key: remember to drink water and you'll have plenty of milk. Remember to eat lots of vegetables and take your supplements and you will keep yourself from feeling miserable. Remember to feed your baby FIRST on his/her cry and you will HAVE milk. If your milk doesn't come in right away, keep the baby on the breast (no matter HOW uncomfortable it is). It will smooth out! The more your baby makes a demand, the more your body will follow through for that demand. I had to include this because _I_ didn't have this information when my son was born.

If you have any questions, please email; we've been learning by the seat of our pants what is right for babies and what parents feel is right for THEM. I decided a long time ago I wanted to have children; I found out there is SO much more to the care and love and everything that goes into a happy baby.

ASK EVERY QUESTION YOU CAN OF THE LACTATION CONSULTANT IN THE HOSPITAL. THEY ARE NOT COVERED BY INSURANCE AFTERWARDS. We lucked out and one answered questions above and beyond, because she wanted to see more people breastfeed vs fall back on formula.

So much we learned the hard way. It is HARD to know which way to turn. You want the best for your baby and don't want to be stressed or tired. You'll be tired. This will be the most WORK you've done in your life. It will be SO worth it.

Congratulations, and I hope the best for you and your little one.

Good Luck,
M.

Congrats! I would not recommend cosleeping in the beginning, as you will be more tired than you can imagine and will not want to worry about rolling on your little angel when he/she is in bed with you. Instead, I'd suggest using a pack & play (with bassinet insert) or if your stroller has a bassinet insert (like the Bugaboo, for ex), use that. When my kids were infants I would put them in bed with me occasionally to help soothe them, but I would be propped up on pillows with baby against my chest (like a little tree frog :) ), and while this would help them rest for an hour or two, I rarely did.

Just a suggestion, however I know that cosleeping works great for lots of families. For me, I was always too paranoid about suffocation. And I needed my rest, too.

Good luck!

My daughter has slept in her crib since the day we brought her home. What made me more comfortable was our video monitor and our monitor that detects motion (breathing). I could just look over at the screen and know she was safe and look at the ticking on the motion monitor to know she was breathing. My daughter is 19 months old now and I still use the video monitor. We have disconnected the motion sensor but it was worth it for the first 6 months. Breastfeeding wasn't an issue. I actually preferred going into her room to feed her. If you want your baby to be in your room, I would suggest using the Pack N Play. We have one and we used it a lot at first (for naps, changing, playing) and we still use it when we travel. I wouldn't suggest letting your baby sleep in bed with you. That can be extremely dangerous. It's easy to roll over on your baby and he/she won't cry to let you know.

I'm a first time mom too, but I will either be getting a pack n play to go by the bed (I'll probably be getting the pack n play regardless) or a cosleeper bed for the baby. It lets the baby be at arm's reach without actually being in your bed, where there's always the risk you or your husband could roll onto or suffocate the baby. I know it's a small risk, but it's just too terrible to imagine, so I'm much more comfortable with the cosleeper attachment! Good luck!

Hi L.,
When my daughter was born, I purchased a bassinet and put it right next to my side of the bed. I breast fed too, so it was easy to just pick her up feed her and put her back in when she was done. I have a ranch so it was easy to wheel it into the kitchen in the morning. She slept in it for the first few of months. They always seem so little for the big crib at first. :) Just follow your instints and you'll be fine.

I would go for a bassinet that has a vibrating feature, lights and music with a remote control! Our bassinet also could be attached to the bed. All the books I read said that it was a waste of money but someone gave us the bassinet and we were SOOOO grateful! We kept it at the foot of our bed so it made night breast feeding very easy. It also was easy to set the vibrator without getting out of bed. During those early days of being an exhausted first time mom those small "luxuries" were worth their weight in gold! A pack and play is handy to have too. I found two of them used and in good condition at a fraction of the price of new. We used one in my office at work and one in our finished basement. Get the kind that has a bassinet insert. That makes diaper changes easier.

We have cautiously done some co-sleeping when baby was sick or having a rough phase. It is important to keep in mind that habbits are hard to break. I suggest reading all you can about co-sleeping and different methods of responding to night time crying etc. Some of the techniques can be controversial. We have tried everything and I finally came to the conclusion that you have to focus on what works for you and your family. Doing your homework will help you make the right decisions for you and your baby. Good luck!!

We put our 3 babies in a Pack N Play next to our bed for the first few months. It worked well. I breastfed as well. In the very beginning its not easy to sleep in bed and breastfeed - you and the baby are trying to figure everything out and latch is a little tough. I rocked in a chair and then put them back down in the Pack N Play (if I didn't fall asleep until the next feeding).
Congrats and good luck!

I feel this is a question of safety. It is not safe to have an infant sleep with you. They can get smothered because they do not have control of their head. It is always safest to have a specially made surface for the baby to sleep in. They make co sleepers that go beside your bed so you can easily reach the baby without getting out of bed that are safe. A pack n play is more like a play pen and should not be used for sleeping (just naps) and are good for travel or going to the beach/park etc.

Hi L.-

I became a first time mom in May, so I know exactly where you are coming from!

I had a basinet for my daughter and I had it in my room until she was 4 months old. Once she turned 4 months I put her in her own crib in her own room.

I would not recommend putting the baby in the bed with you. As a new mom you will need as much sleep as you can manage and you may not be able to sleep with a baby in your bed, Also you do not want to have your baby getting used to sleeping with you. It gets hard to get them out!

I had a pack in play in my living room and I still do. Its a great place to put the baby during the day when he/she is first born and it also becomes a great play pen. My daughter will be 8 months tomorrow and she uses the pack n play all the time.

I hope this helps!

Good luck!

L.,
Co sleeping can be very dangerous and has resulted in several fatalities in Monroe County, just within the last year. I work at a facility that keeps track of infant deaths and work with a doctor that highly discourages co sleeping. Please take this advice seriously as should all new parents. Good question.
K.

Here's what I think is the ideal scenario - but this is what worked best for me. For the first 3-4 months we used a mini co-sleeper which attaches to the bed. Then we shifted our sons into the crib once they were too big (or almost too big) for the co-sleeper. Pack n'Plays in my opinion are really only best for travel. They are not great for sleeping since they don't have a real mattress. You can get padded sheets for them - but they are still not nearly as comfortable for full-time use. The co-sleeper and Pack N Plays are things you can usually borrow from friends - especially the co-sleeper because you can only use it for a certain period. Thus there are a lot of lightly used ones in friends houses. I have one that was a hand-me-down and in btwn my two sons a friend used it and it's still in great shape. The crib is something the child will then likely use for a solid two years or more. Good luck!

I have gone through the gambit of sleeping arrangements - starting with the three-sided baby bed, then to the bassinet, then to a portable bed-side crib and now to co-sleeping in my bed. I found that the small baby bed was really nice during the first month or so - but its usefulness will largely depend on your sleeping arrangements, because they take up a lot of space (I use to place my Boppy wedge pillow on the lower half and used multiple receiving blankets to snuggle him in tight). The bassinet was nice because you can rock the baby and the crib was also nice because you can set up all sorts of visually and auditorily stimulating doo-dads, which they love beginning around 2 months.

Pack n' Plays, by themselves are pretty handy - I have one set up in the living room. I used to nap my baby in it when he was younger, but now I use it solely as a changing table and a place to put him down. They are also convenient for extended stays with family. If you get a nice one that doesn't bow in the middle, it could certainly suffice in lieu of a bassinet.

That being said, now that my baby has hit 5 months and has a little meat on his bones, I really prefer co-sleeping - it feels the most natural to me - granted you have to take precautions to make sure that he is safe, but it is easy and you get to enjoy his closeness all night long.

Hi L.,
Congratulations on your upcoming arrival.
I am sure your pediatrician will have some advice, but as far as I am aware you should never have your baby in bed with you. The fear is that you might roll over and suffocate or at the very least injure the child. The best answer is to get a bassinet or small cradle for the first few months of the baby's life. You can have it right next to your bed. You should avoid having any lose blankets or any bumpers in it in case the baby rolls over and suffocates. You should simply dress the baby warm and swaddle him/her with the receiving blanket or with a swaddle (sold in babys r us) A baby can "graduate" to a crib when he/she is a little older and out grows the cradle.
I hope this was helpful. The nurses in the maternity ward also be very helpful about teaching you how to swaddle the baby in the receiving blanket if you ask them for help.
We have a pack and play, but we only use it for visits and travel. It is a little wider and bigger than you would need for a newborn. The bassinet or cradle is really the best way to go.
Best of luck to you.
J.

whatever you decide, keepingbabiessafe.org is a great resource to get on an email list for crib recalls, and for child broduct safety informaiton. I am on the board of directors there, and would say that the most important thing is not where your child sleeps- in your bed, in a crib, a co-sleepet, etc, but that you educate yourself about safety issues with each sleep environment. There are ways to make co sleeping safe, and ways to do it unsafely, and there are things to know about cribs and basinetts before putting your baby inside.

Just one of the many tough decisions as a parent... I am sure you will make the best one for you and your family.

C.

Dear L.,
My daughter is also due in Feb. and she had a similar question which we discussed at length. You do not want to put a newborn baby in a crib right away. Remember that for the last 9 months they have been in an enclosed area of the womb and a crib to them would seem like throwing a small fish into an ocean. For the frist few months, a baby is most comfortable and secure in a bassinette - a smaller, cozier type of bed. Also, you can keep a bassinette right next to your bed for the convenience of night feedings. It allows you hear every sound they make and monitor their breathing.
You do not want to have the baby sleeping in bed with you by any means. The risks of them smothering are tremendous! Pillows, adults, sheets, and blankets can be devestating to bodies so small, just imagine. They can also fall off the bed causing harm.
The new pack-and-plays come with insert for newborns, which is a marvelous invention. Plus they have a changing table attached. Since I will be the caretaker for my granddaughter, I bought one for my house. I can also use it as playpen later on. I think it's a good investment. You can use it as a bassinette, changing table, playpen, and a travelling crib.
I hope this helps.
Good luck, W.

I exclusively breastfed 2 children and I HIGHLY recommend the co-sleeper (by arm's reach). It's like a pack n play but it attaches to the side of your bed ! It's sold online or at baby stores (like babies r us).

Since you will be breast feeding, I would get the pack n play that attaches to your bed. It gives the baby a safe place to sleep while giving you easy access for breast feeding. It converts to a regular pack n play to use as your baby grows. It's not safe to have the baby in bed with you as you run the risk of harming your baby in your sleep.

I guess it really depends on you. I knew that I never wanted to cosleep, so we started out with baby in the pack n play next to the bed. I also was never comfortable nursing in bed; I always got up and went to a separate location anyway, so it made no difference that she was in the pack n play. I don't know a ton about cosleeping, but I do know that it is not right for my family and I did not want to start the habit at all. I also don't believe it is safe, although many will disagree with me.
BUT I would get a pack n play, regardless. It is great for trips to the grandparents, and unless you plan on napping with the baby everytime he/she naps, then you need some place to lay him/her down.

When my DS was born, we had gotten the arms reach mini co sleeper, mainly because I was going to be breastfeeding, and because we don't have much space on that side of the bed. It worked out great for the first 2 months or so. By that time, I was so tired, that one night when he woke to eat, I brought him into bed with me and we both fell asleep while nursing. AFter that, we would co-sleep until he fell back to sleep and I would transition him into the co-sleeper. After a little while of doing that, I kept him in bed with us and we were all sleeping much better! Since he wasn't moving around in those days, we had him swaddled and kept him in between us for the next 2 months. By 4 months, I transitioned him to the crib (mostly). He outgrew the co-sleeper too (he was 19 lbs by 4 months!)

I loved the co-sleeper. It was so nice to have him close by at night. Pack n Play is similar, but I don't think you can attach it to the bed like you can with the co sleeper.

Hi L.,
If you start co-sleeping...it's really hard to stop. If that is your choice it is perfectly fine, just know that it won't be for just a couple months it may be for a lot longer than that. My first baby was in bed with us for 12 weeks before I stopped and it was hard to have to listen to him cry because he wanted to be in bed with Mommy. I too think it was easier to co-sleep because I had a c-section and was nursing. You could try buying a snuggle nest which makes the transition a lot easier. I used it for my second child and then transferred him to the pack-n-play in our room and it was a lot easier getting him to sleep on his own than my first one!

I have a pack-n-play and it was so worth the money because we travel a lot and take it Grandma's. http://www.babydelight.com/ is for the snuggle nest. It was OKAY. I liked it because it made my life easier with the c-section and nursing until I felt up to sitting up fully and getting the baby out of the pack-n-play or bassinet at night. My only complaint is that my son would slip down and not stay in it some nights!

Congratulations and good luck!!
C.

You'll want a pack n play for travel anyway, unless you never stay at a relative's or anywhere outside your own home. As a "play yard" they're pretty small, some kind of fenced in area of your house works better. I never had an attachable co-sleeper so I don't know what those are like. My daughter was in a bassinet a friend loaned me initially, and then moved to her crib (which had a high mattress setting, making it easier to lift her in and out). At my parents shore house, which was 2 floors and had bad baby monitor transmission, we had her sleep in the bassinette part of the pack n play for naps downstairs, and in a bassinette in our room at bed time. If we had co-slept with our daughter in our bed, no one would have had any sleep almost from birth. She slept well, but she was the wriggly-est little baby from the time she stopped being swaddled on.

Good luck! And don't worry, no matter what baby products you pick for car seats, strollers, cribs, swings, ad infinitum, you will be a good mom, there is so much guilt and pressure to buy the best, safest, braniest, products out there, but it's all marketing pressure, we must be good little consumers and spend spend spend. You can borrow everything, buy used, etc. You will love your baby and your baby will thrive, it doesn't matter what products you use.

That is a very good question, L.. There is a lot of pressure in the United States to be a perfect parent, and sometimes it is tied to selling products. I have heard that the more time you are able to spend with your baby, in physical contact, talking to your baby so that your baby recognizes the sound of your voice, the better it is for you and your child's development, but I don't know that to be a fact. I know that I would be scared to sleep with my baby, because I toss and turn a lot, although I like the idea of cradling a baby in between my partner and I at night. Wikipedia says that co-sleeping is common practice outside North America, Europe, and Australia. You can read more here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Co-sleeping

Co-sleeping worked very well for me and I had my little one in there until she was weaned off breast milk -- 12 months :-). I gave one away, I had to upgrade because she got too big, and sold the other on ebay. Note: Hubby was very unhappy that she stayed in our room that long (even though she napped in her crib in her room.) Mine was a tiny preemie so I would have it no other way. Your choice.

Looks like you already got a lot of advice - I'm sure your head is spinning even more now.

I started out with a small sized pack'n'play. Well, I had a big baby and a fast grower so he grew out of it really fast.

Then I borrowed a regular sized Arms Reach co-sleeper. I LOVED it!! I will definitely invest in one for baby #2.

If you don't want to spend the $$ for a co-sleeper though, I'd say a pack'n'play is the way to go. And it's not a waste of $$. After the baby stops sleeping in it, it has plenty of other uses. I used to plop my guy in there once he could crawl and I needed to do something. And my guy is almost 2 and we still take it with us when we travel to grandparents for a place to sleep.

Good luck with the new baby!

Hi L.,
I have a 3 year old and a 6 month old. I am also a breastfeeding mom. I don't really recommend a pack-n-play. I got one with my first and we never used it. For my first, I used a co-sleeper right next to the bed and for the new one, I used a bassinet right next to the bed. It's great because it allows you to have your own sleeping space but the baby is right next to you, so when she cries or fidgets, you can just reach over and scoop her up into the bed with you. I would boob her and either put her back in or keep her in the bed with me. I just started putting my new one in the crib (in my room) at night because she's too big for the bassinet now.
Hope that helps,
T.

We bought a small bassinet that we had right next to the bed. But we practically never used it. It felt right to co-sleep.
Most of the world co-sleeps. As long as neither parent does drugs or drinks heavily you will not suffocate your baby. To me it felt more safe because I was right there and very aware of him. It is a personal decision. If you try co-sleeping read Dr. Sears recommendations -- no puffy bedding, no pillows near the child, etc.

But until the child arrives you might not know how you feel. I would buy a co-sleeper or bassinet. Pack n plays are good for naps. Best wishes.

Hi! You will probably want to use a bassinet for the first three months or so. You can use the pack n play or there is a bassinet called the "co sleeper". We have it and it worked really well for both my sons(3yrs and 6months). You don't want to let the baby sleep in the bed with you unless your going to use the co sleeper that goes in your bed. I breastfed both of my sons and its definetly easier to have them in your room. At the end of the day what ever gets you a little sleep at night will do!

Hi,
I'm on my third - sleeping with baby can be OK for a nap but never for the whole night...its just not safe. Pack n play is good for a home you visit for day trips or to plop your baby in for play time...but I wouldn't recommend for sleeping every day...at least mine were never comfortable in them.

The best thing for the beginning is a co-sleeper - this is a mini crib with 3 full sides and one half side that attaches to your bed. Baby is safe and right there whenever he/she needs to eat. I highly recommend it - worth every penny!

Hi L.,

First of all, congratulations! Some suggestions on what I did, and what worked for me...

My daughter, now 21 months, slept in her crib when she came home from the hospital. It was quite inconvenient when breastfeeding, so we got a bassinet and kept it in our room. We moved, and in our new place, we were able to keep the crib in our bedroom, and that worked too.

Now, after reading about attachment parenting (Dr. Sears) I would recommend co-sleeping. We co-sleep with our daughter now, and it is AWESOME!!! At first, it is a little hard to get used to, but mothers and fathers have an instinct that prevents them from rolling over onto their baby. There was research done that said many more babies died in their first year from SIDS in their own crib, than co-sleeping accidents. (Dr. Sears again)

A crib I would suggest that is totally worth the money is the type that changes from a crib, to a toddler bed, to a day bed, to a twin bed. It was $180.00 from Babies R Us (online) and it is GREAT. We figured if our daughter didn't use it too much as a baby, she would use it as she grows older - good investment.

I would NOT suggest a pack and play for sleeping, unless you add additional cushioning. The bottom of them are very stiff, and I would worry about suffocation if the baby moves close to the sides. However, I WOULD suggest a pack and play for traveling, etc. We got one, and since my husband played baseball, it was perfect to set up at the games for our daughter to safely play. Now, that she can walk, run, etc. She wants nothing to do with it - wants to be free to play, but definitely worth the money for the time she did use it.

Good luck, and just remember, what matters is YOUR instinct to take care of your baby. No suggestions from others are as important as what you believe to be right!!! Also, more than half of the things that are suggested that you need to raise a happy, healthy baby, are NOT needed. So much of it is overkill and companies that sell baby stuff target the first time moms and dads - just follow your instincts and you will be fine!!

Good luck,
L.

Hi L.,
I know you've received so many responses and I haven't been able to get through them all, but for our daughter, we bought a co-sleeper which was next to my bed. she would breast feed in the bed, but afterwards, i would put her back in the co-sleeper to sleep, that way she could get used to sleeping on her own. We never bought a pack n play, they are bulky (we need as much space as possible in this city) and we didnt really see the need for one. best of luck with whatever you decide.

Hi L.

Congratulations! Don't worry, take your time, you don't need to get everything now.

Co-sleeping might seem like a good idea but it can be very dangerous if the baby sleeps in the bed with the parents. Parents can roll over on the baby, or bed covers can suffocate them.

Pack N plays are great for naps and changing diapers but if you use them for sleeping, do not put any additional mattress, sheets or blankets on top of the padding that comes with it. The baby can get tangled in these and suffocate.

Your best bet is to place the baby in the crib with a firm baby mattress that fits snugly. Gerber crib sheets (sold at Babies R Us) are highly rated and have strong wraparound elastic that keeps the sheets from coming off. Breathable crib bumpers (made of white mesh) and SleepSacs wearable blankets (made by Halo) will keep your baby warm. That's all you need.

Do not use blankets, quilted opaque crib bumpers, baby quilts, or leave any type of pillow or stuffed animal in the crib - these are dangerous as well and and suffocate a baby. They're for decoration only, your best bet is to not waste money on them.

Use a good monitor (like one from Graco) to pick up sounds from your baby or if you prefer, place a bed in the nursery so you can stay there for night feedings. The baby won't know you're there if you have a mesh bumper, and it will be easier in the long run as they'll be sleeping in their own room from the get go. A rocking chair or a back support for the bed will help with nursing.

I agree, there's way too much stuff out there, and the good news is, you don't need most of it. Here's my list of the best baby products to get you started:

http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Gear-101-the-10-you-ll-actuall...

We use the pack n play for travel and staying over at friends' houses or hotels. When my daughter was under 1 I would also put her in there to play when I needed her to be safe in the living room.
We co-slept with her for several months and found it quite easy (and a nice bonding experience). Then transitioned her to a crib.
We are expecting #2 and are planning to use the Arms Reach Co-sleeper which attaches to the side of the bed, but seems more convenient/manageable since the baby is not actually IN your bed with you. They have a website www.armsreach.com
The co-sleeper can also convert to a pack n play.
Good luck,
C

Depends on what you feel comfortable with, but you might want to look at the Arms Reach Mini Cosleeper. I found great success with it. Basically it's a side car that fits up to your bed - so you can have your own space, but you can also very easily reach for the baby to feed at night. I found comfort as a first time mom to be able to see my baby right next to me and know she was doing fine. I also got a TON more sleep not having to get in and out of bed to move the baby from one place to another for feedings/comforting. Also, I sold mine on ebay after we were done with it (around a year - when my daughter could figure out how to get out of it) so there may be used ones out there if you don't want to spend the $$$ on a new one. Hope that helps!

Hi L.
Congratulations!! I remember just 2 years ago this time of year I was very anxiously awaiting the birth of my daughter..(she was born Jan 2nd).
I too a first time Mom and I decided from the very beginning that our daughter would sleep in our room.
I put her pack and play right next to my side of the bed and thats where she remained until she got too big for it.
She never liked to lay flat in the very beginning, so I had to have her sleep in her carrier seat in the pack and play until she was ready to sleep in it on her own.
I just felt extremely comfortable that she was right near me. I found that I could be right there to help her with every little need that she had and I didn't have to get up out of bed to get her. If she was restless and I knew she needed me to hold her, I just lifted her up and she would fall asleep right on my chest.
There will be nights when your baby will sleep right between the two of you and others when he/she will not fuss at all and will miss that nightly feeding and you will wake at 5 am and think, Wow the baby slept the night!!

I have to tell you that my daughter slept in the pack and play until she was 1 year old. Then I gradually put down for her naps in her crib but kept her in the pack and play at night. It wasn't until she was 18 months that she officially went to bed all the time in her crib.
LOL, my husband and I really missed her too.
(we still do)

You are going to love being a Mom and you are going to fall in love with your baby. Just remember, do what is in your heart, not always what other people tell you to do nor the things you read about in magazines. If it works for you and your baby, then just do it.
If you feel better to have your little one right next to you all the time, then do just that.
I really feel my daughter never wanted for anything b/c I was right there to get her the minute she needed something.
I never made her "cry it out" or fuss for long periods of time. Your baby needs you to be there right away when he/she is fussing. By you responding quickly, you will only reinforce that wonderful bond that Mother and baby have and your baby will be very contented and happy.

God Bless you and your baby.
Best of luck to you and just follow your heart!
P.
P.S. I do have to tell you that I did purchase a pack and play mattress b/c the pack and plays really are hard and do not offer any support for sleeping.
If you buy one, just make sure it is a tight fit in the pack and play. The mattresses meant for the pack and plays are usually a good fit but if it has any gaps to the sides, return it for another mattress.

We did not intend to co-sleep but ended up doing that - she started out in a bassinet next to our bed, but I was breastfeeding and the only place she would fall asleep was next to me. It took one very long week to transition her into her own crib in her own room. But co-sleeping worked for us and we never, not once, had any fear of rolling over or injuring her in some way. Good luck!

If you choose co-sleeping you may be doing it for a long time. Most times when a baby gets used to co-sleeping it is very difficult to get them out of your bed. I never did it I was always afraid (my husband is a really big guy) of injury. It really is personal preference I know people who co-sleep and love it and others who wish they never started it. I used a bassinet when my kids were small and that is really only for short term use. I would think a pack and play is much more practical because you will use it for years. Good luck on your new baby!! My son was a February baby who is turning 25 this year LOL!!

I never cosleept, always afraid of the babies' safety and starting a habit. Put my first in her crib from the beginning, but put my twins in one pack-n-play bassinet and later two before we got a second crib. I think a Pack-n-Play are better than a bassinet for their versatility. Still use them for my kids to sleep in when we are on vacations.

Now this is my experience...which differs from most people...but I thought I would share it anyway for another perspective. Though i always exclusively nursed, i actually prefered having all my kids in a nearby room (with monitors). In order to deal competently with them, especially the twins, in the night, I felt that the short walk to their bedside "unfuzzed" my head. Also when we got to the stage when they would nurse and lay back down for more sleep, I never had a problem with getting back to sleep. But my kids all when through the stage where they would not lay back down easily. That's when I needed room to walk them and rock them, which really couldn't be done in our small bedroom. I also had acid reflux issues with the twins and they always ended up sleeping part of the night in their carseat carriers, back in the early days. They would not lay flat even next to me. Good luck with what you choose. Sadly you can not necessarily buy the right product and prevent nighttime difficulty. And you don't always realize what suits you until you are inthe middle of it all. Good luck.

My baby girl is now 5 1/2 months old. I had the same dilemna when I first brought her home from the hospital. I exclusively breast feed and she still wakes up through the night once or twice. What I ended up doing was putting a little bassinet right next to our bed because, even though co-sleeping has many benefits, we knew we didn't want to go that route. We needed our personal time after the baby went to sleep at night. We had her in the bassinet, swaddled, right next to our bed. I would pick her up and nurse her in our bed, usually both of us drfting off for a while and then I would put her in the bassinet when I would wake back up. We did this until she was 6 weeks old at which time we moved her into her own room in her big crib... she started to hate being swaddled & the bassinet didn't seem safe with the covering it had on it if she could grab them unswaddled. At first it felt so strange - she felt so far away even though she was just across the hall and the crib so big... but she adjusted just fine and I am glad we did it this way now... I hold her to fall asleep and then put her in her crib and she drifts right off... you will figure out your own way - trust your instincts!

Also as far as co-sleeping is concerned I will add that a mother seems to always be aware of her child (as long as not under the influence of drugs or alcohol) but a spouse may not always be. My husband is the most wonderful father - intuitive & involved in every way - but I was always the one to hear every breath my daughter made no matter how sound asleep I was!

I don't have a pack & play yet - but have to get one - but I currently depend on a bouncey seat & my sling and ergo baby carrier to get stuff done!!

I'm not a big co-sleeper. I know some parents who are and who are HUGE advocates...but for us, I just thought it was not a habit we wanted to start. Like the others have said, once you start co-sleeping, it's hard to break it and you will be co-sleeping for a long time!!! We've had a rule from the beginning to keep our girls out of our bed (9mo. and 2 1/2 yrs) as much as possible. We let them in in the morning to snuggle for a few minutes, but that is about it (we also read books in our bed throughout the day, etc, but we have been very careful to not make it a place they want to sleep- most friends who have given in on this, have had long term issues with kiddos in their bed at night!). Both of them slept in a hand me down bassinet that we put right next to the bed and which I would highly recommend (or the pack n play w/ bassinet insert). I loved having them right in the room those first few months when I was nursing every 3 hours... at around 2-3 months, when the space between feedings got longer we transferred both to their cribs...Good luck!

hi L., please dont put your baby in bed with you. having said that, ill tell you that all my babies were in bed with me for some length of time. but i was so scared i never truly slept, which doesnt make it safe, it just makes you more exhausted and compromised. lots of people are in favor of cosleeping, it works for lots of people, but..in my opinion, its just not safe. also have to consider the size of your bed along with how your significant other sleeps. my hubby is big and sleeps all over and nothing wakes him up, not safe. if you do have baby in bed, get the blankets and pillows out at the very least, and who can sleep like that?? if you are breastfeeding, and even if you're not, imo, there is no better investment than a cosleeper. (aside from a great breast pump) your baby is safe, and he/she is right there next to you, you will sleep knowing the baby is safe. my first baby slept with/on me a lot, i didnt have a co sleeper for him. they tend to eat more often when you are breastfeeding and although you might not intend to, its almost impossible to not end up falling asleep with baby in bed. if you have the co sleeper, you just put them in. plus, when they are upset at night, often you can just reach over and lay a hand on them and it settles them. if they are in bed with you, they are even closer, they feel and smell you even more, and i feel they were never satisfied with just a touch, they always wanted to nurse, even if it was just for comfort. which is fine, you should feed on demand, especially in the beginning, but i think there is a bit less demand if they are a couple of feet away from you on a sheet that doesnt have your scent on it. plus, the co sleeper turns into a pack n play, though not as versatile as some of them, so you shouldnt need to buy one of those too. the only thing about the co sleeper is that its probably only good for about 4-6 mos, that was the time that both of my 2 youngest were able to kind of pull themselves up on the edge, so youll have to just use it as a pack n play and switch to the crib, which is fine. you will get a lot of opinions on this, im sure lots of moms will disagree with me, the sleep issue can be tough and people have all sorts of things that work for each different kid. the crib is safest, and you will all probably sleep better with baby in the crib because in bed or the cosleeper you feel and hear each other moving around and it can be counter-productive. i was just never able to do the crib with the breastfeeding in the first weeks, so the cosleeper was the best compromise with reality and safety. anyone that could do it, more power to them! best of luck to you!

We did a combination of both: we allowed our daughter to fall asleep in our bed and I'd move her to her crib for the rest of the night. When she inevitably awoke around 3:00 AM for a feeding I'd always put her in her crib afterward. Sometimes she went right back to sleep; other times she clearly wanted me so I'd put her in bed with us. When she was sick she'd stay in bed with us all night.

When she turned 2 and was getting too heavy for me to pick up and carry to her crib after falling asleep, we converted the crib to a toddler bed and I started getting her used to falling asleep in it. When she woke up during the night she always wanted to get in our bed, which was fine with us. This arrangement worked out very well until she was about 4 and started staying in her bed all night. Even now at 10 years old she still likes to occasionally camp out in our room.

Congrats on your new baby and best of luck!

Hi L., I have always co-slept with my childre (I have 3). I currently have a 2 year old still sleeping with me from birth. I would not have it any other way. I plan to kick him out at 3. Babies should co-sleep with parents, especially newborns b/c it regulates their breathing. Here is a link for you: http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2009/1...

I recommend co-sleeping. It's the most natural way for a baby to sleep per thousands of years of human existence. I also recommend reading Jean Liedloff's book The Continuum Concept -- it completely shaped and inspired my style of parenting and it has proven to be the best decision we made while we were pregnant.

We did have an Arm's Reach Universal Co-sleeper next to the bed which was used for brief intervals during daytime napping and/or before I got into bed in the first 4 mths. But ultimately, it was not really worth it.

We also had a GRACO Pack N Play play yard which was a complete waste of money/space. No baby wants to feel trapped, abandoned or alone for very long. At best it was only used for 5 minutes tops around age 7 months. Not worth buying or having.

Definitely worth it to 'wear your baby'. We used the soft fabric MOBY wrap for the first few months and then switched to the Pikkolo carrier. Both can be configured to go on the front, side hip or back depending on the size of the baby. Slings did not work for us since I am small framed and it was too much strain to the weight on only one shoulder. (The MOBY and the Pikkolo are evenly distributed weight.) The Ergo is also comparable to the Pikkolo.

www.kellymom.com is a good resource for breastfeeding moms.
Good luck.

~ M. (Liam, 14 mths)

I used the crib from day one. I would recommend it because you never end up in the position my friens who coslept did, with a one-year old still in your bed and refusing to sleep in their crib. If you decide not to do that, I recommend the pack and play, we really used it a lot - both at home and while traveling so you will get your moneys worth.

I used a bassinet right next to my bed in the beginning, that seemed to work well. I depends on what you are comfortable with. You can also use a pack n play that comes with a bassinet. Or they have those cosleepers to put in the bed with you that you can buy to make it a little safer. A pack and play may be more cost effective because you can use it when they are bigger babies without the bassinet. A bassinett you stop using after 3 or 4 months, same with the cosleeper that you out in your bed. I am not sure how safe it would be to just put a newborn in your bed with you without a cosleeper bed. Hope I didn't confuse you more!

I recommend the "co-sleeper" too. It can be found at http://www.armsreach.com/
I used it for my 2 kids and nursed both. There is a mini and a regular. The mini doesn't last as long (maybe 7 mo) but is less expensive. But these are great, they attach to your bed so its a safe extension of your bed, and it can also convert to a pack and play if you want to keep the 4th side up and just have it right next to your bed. I co sleep now with my 11 mo old and no one gets any sleep....Good Luck.

I am sure after getting 52 responses, your poor brain is even more fried! Do what is right for you...and you can figure it out as you go. The best of luck to you. It will work out no matter which option you decide...according to baby sleep consultants I know, you have a good 2-4 months to do what ever you want before you can even think about "sleep training" anyways...

All four of mine went right into a crib. Then you never
have a problem of transitioning from co-sleeper etc .
Congratulations.

I would not put the baby in the bed with you- not only can it be dangerous but it's a hard habit to break (on your part and baby's!) Get a bassinet that you can put next to your bed. My son slept next to me his bassinet for four months and when he was too big for the bassinet, he went into his own room in his crib. I breast fed him for 11 months.

L. -- We put our daughter in her crib the very first night and had no issues or problems. We just used the pack n play during the day when we were downstairs rather than having to go up and down the stairs every time she woke up. Plus we wanted her to get used to sleeping with noise all around her during the day. As for breast feeding, I didn't find it an issue at night. I got up fed and changed her, sat in the rocking chair, rocked her back to sleep and put her down and went back to bed for as long as she'd let me sleep. We never had to go through the issue of getting her used to sleeping in her crib after spending months either cosleeping or in the pack n play.
Good luck

Hi L.,

With my first son, we had an antique bassinet that my mother-in-law, husband, and sister-in-law were all in as babies (it is sturdy and since newborns don't roll over, I was not worried about the bars). We kept that right next to our bed, but honestly I frequently fell asleep nursing at some point. I kept a pillow to the baby's back (below the head) and the blankets down around my waist (and the baby's) to prevent possible smothering. Not trying to sound freaky, but I had plenty of people upset that I did this. With my first son, we used the bassinet until he outgrew it, then the pack-n-play until he was about 6-months-old (because my husband wanted him in our room), then we moved him into the crib in his room.

My second boy was in the bassinet, then stayed in the pack-n-play until around a year, when we finally got him mostly moved in with his brother in the crib (brother is on a twin). There is no reason not to use a pack-n-play as long as you follow manufacturuer instructions and use proper sheets, etc. If you expect to travel much, it can be quite a lifesaver, if only to give you a clean, safe place for the baby to "play" when visiting other people.

I have had friends who had co-sleepers (that are level with the mattress and sit next to the bed) and loved them. I did not want to spend more than I had to on "extra" products, and was pretty satisfied with the way we did things. I think you often get more sleep making it safe to drowse with the baby anyway, just make sure that you are not impaired by anything (glass of wine, sleep pill, etc.) because it can be harder to wake yourself if the baby needs you.

(If you can find any of those items new with product information, that might be a good idea to save $$ and still get you some extras that you might love having.)

I felt the same way you do. I think the pack n play is worth it, or another option is a bassinet, that will be right next to your bed. Most pack n play's come with the bassinet option, so you will get longer use out of it than just a bassinet. My son is 27 months and we still you our pack n play for naps at his grandma's house. A really good one is Chicco. I also work at a baby store and have been able to compare. I don't think it is a good idea to put the baby in the bed with you though. I have just never been one for that. Good luck and congrats.

--

Hey L. - I think it's ultimately up to what you want to do and whether you'd use a pack'n'play at a later date. We did a mini co-sleeper attached to the side of the bed by arm's reach. It was fantastic but after about 6 weeks our LO didn't want to have any more to do with it and we weren't ready to let our LO go into the crib so we bought a little unit that goes in the bed between the two of us. It was the best thing and I wish we would have done that first. It allowed the co-sleeping situation without the bulk and it had a hard outer casing that protected her so that we didn't roll over onto her. We have a king sized bed which made this doable but if you have a smaller bed, this would be tight.

We also got a pack 'n' play since we travel about 10 hours home to see family for the holidays and for vacations. We use the pack 'n' play when we go over to local friend's houses for dinner and a video or dinner and game night. It's wonderful to do that since we can throw it up in a bedroom and let her sleep in it while we're downstairs playing games. We also have a little tent that we used when she got to be about 6 months as we spend a bit of time at the beach with family every year and this allowed us to bring the LO down to the beach and she could fall asleep protected in the baby tent while we hung out next to her. We plan on using this tent when we fly in January since we don't want to lug the pack-n-play on the airplane.

Ultimately I feel like I've tried it all (mostly because people bought things for us insisting that we needed to try them or we found them at garage sales or church sales).

If you want your LO to sleep in the room with you, co-sleeping is the easiest and cheapest but my husband and I were just so scared of rolling onto our baby. The little in-bed unit is about $40 at Target or BRU and it works great until they're about 3 to 4 months old. I even packed it in my suitcase when I traveled with my LO on the plane for a bridal shower. If you have the room and want to shell out money for something else, the pack-n-play or the full sized Arm's Reach co-sleeper (which later becomes a pack-n-play - not the one we got), are both wonderful items if you want to have some adult time out at a friend's at a later date, want to drop of your child at a family member's for a night and need a place for them to sleep, travel to see people or want to put your child in a play pen while you're stirring the pasta sauce. If you don't see yourself leaving home for the first year, and don't have any large pets (like we do) and feel that you'd never need to set your child down in a safe place to play while you're doing something else, then skip the pack-n-play and save your money.

We definitely use the pack-n-play though because of space in our bedroom didn't use it when our LO was first born plus I had a c-section and the Pack-n-play would have required me to still get out of bed since it wasn't at the same level as the bed. We have a split level house so I kept it downstairs in my office during the day so that my LO could play and nap in it while I worked. Hope this helps. One thing to remember is that when we were infants, our parents usually put us in a play pen to play while they fixed dinner or did other things. I even have pics of me outside playing in the playpen during the summer while my mom planted her garden. The Pack-n-play is the modern version of the play pen. We didn't buy a changing table (not enough room) so we used the pack-n-play downstairs with the changing table since I spent most of my days down there. It truly is versatile but not a perfect system! Good luck.

L....A pack n play is not a waste of money. You can absolutely use it in the beginning. I kept my sons in it in my room so that I didn't have to run to their room (too tired)! I never felt comfortable keeping them in my bed, but some people do. If you are breast feeding, which I highly recommend, it's really easy. You can also use a bassinet. Good luck with your new baby. It is a wonderful time. Enjoy!!

pack and plays are good to have because they fold up real nice and can be taken with you when visiting family. Sleeping with the baby in bed can be a chalenge if you move around a lot, also you would be tempted to sleep with the baby in your arms which can lead to the posibilty of droping him/her. My suggestion to to purchase a bassenet. They are typically just the right size and wouldn't take up much room. Usually they come with wheels and that way you could bring it throughout the house. The other plus is that they are solid meaning no bars which is a bit safer as you get used to how your baby sleeps. Some babys begin to scoot around their crib as early as 3 months, so when making the transition to the crib "bumppers" are esential. You can look around in antique or second hand stores for the bassenet, they'd be cheaper or you can try an unfished furniture store then all the mark and dings are visible and it kind of becomes a keep sake. Good luck, enjoy every second and take lots of pictures they grow so fast. My son is eight years old now but it seems like only yesterday.

Hi!
Our stroller had a great, comfy basinet attachment, and our son slept in that for the first couple of months. It was great bc we could just wheel him right up to the bed and then he was close by for easy nighttime feedings, but we still had the bed to ourselves. it was also easy then for naps bc we could wheel him into other rooms at nap time. The packnplays are good for having a place for baby to sleep when you travel.
Good luck!!

I knew I did not even want the babies to get the idea of co-sleeping so we did a pack and play at first. You will find lots of uses for a pack and play anyway so it is well worth getting one. It is great for traveling and for downstairs in a 2 story house (most have a changing table part). We got a second used one for grandma's house. Other options are a bassinet or co-sleeper. If you breastfeed a co-sleeper (like a small crib that attaches to the bed) can be handy. But both of those are small and outgrown fairly fast (borrowing or buying a used one will cut costs since there is so much baby gear and a lot of it is out grown at 3, 6 or 12 months.) We have friends who have one child who is right in the middle of our two agewise and we are constantly swapping baby and toddler gear and hand me down clothes.

Putting the baby right in the crib may work too. You can get sleep positioners that make it feel smaller. A sleep sack or swaddle sack also will keep the baby cozy. My son was a big baby (9 lbs) and was in the crib anyway at 4-6 weeks. We have the crib near our bed so getting up only requires moving a few feet. Some people move the crib sooner but we kept our son in the crib in our room until he was over 2 and ready for a twin bed (and his sister was on the way).

How exciting tha tyour first one is on his or her way . . .I always had the baby sleep in a cradle next to my side of the bed for the first 4 mos or so. After that I either placed him/her in a crib in their own room, or put them in a pack n play next to my bed as I was still nursing. Half the time the baby ended up co-sleeping as well - it all depends on what you are comfortable with. The cradle worked for me as I slept better with baby right next to me but in her/his own space.

Take care and good luck

i hear the baby sleeping with us is a bad idea cause then its really hard habit to break. i on the other hand am getting a pack n play for my baby, and setting it right by our bed. thats just my opion but its up to you. good luck on your first as it is my first too!

A pack n play is great to have for traveling or for napping the baby during the day. As the baby gets older, it is a safe place for the baby to play when you are doing dishes or switching the laundry, etc. You can certainly use the pack n play at night in your room. The first couple of months the baby may wake often and it is comforting to have the baby close to you. I would even recommend a video monitor. After a month or so with the baby in the room with you, you will start to wonder if it is you waking the baby or the baby waking you. You will find that the monitor is reassuring as you can see the baby as he/she sleeps,awakens and cries.

The mini cosleeper has worked wonderful for us. It goes right next to the bed, height is adjustable, and the side goes down, so they are even with you!! My daughter is 6 months old today.....and still in it!! I've had to put the side up since she is rolling over now, but she is not sitting up or pulling up yet. In the next couple weeks, we will be transitioning her into the pack n play in our room because I am just not ready to put her in her crib because it is in her 4 year old brothers room, they have to share a room. I am not quite comfortable leaving them together just yet. I am also only breasfeeding and she sleeps in our bed quite a bit since we both fall asleep while nursing. But, she always starts in the cosleeper every night and she goes to bed wonderfully. And, it's also nice because when i do wake up and she's next to me and i feel i need more space that night.....I just pick her up and put her right back in her cosleeper without even getting out of bed. It's perfect....I love our setup and am getting sad just thinking about the transition to her pack n play and then eventually to her crib. They are only babies once!!!! Congrats, good luck, and be so proud....you are breastfeeding!!!!

i used the co sleeper thing for awhile but in the end he rarely slept in it - he always slept with us - i got much more sleep as he could nurse without waking me up and it functioned as 'dont fall off the bed' insurance! i never used it as a play pen.
i have read that babies sleep better with their mommy they have been inside you and are used to being warm and touched, but also there is evidence of lower SIDS rates- that the mothers breath out stimulates their breathing and that when in the other room in their crib did have disruptions in breathing when away from the moms breath -
food for thought!
my only regret is i wish had been more diligent in getting him to fall asleep without my presence and as he got older sleep alone -
i loved having him sleep with us and if i had another id definitely do it again!
blessings and good luck!

One more answer, similar to many. We got a Clear-Vue (I think that is the spelling) co-sleeper bassinett from Arm's reach. It is similar to the mini, but has totally mesh sides, which I liked for air flow and also to see the baby. We had a sleigh bed, so attaching to our bed was not an option, but I pulled the bassinett right up to our beds so she was right next to us, but in her own space. She had reflux and sometimes all that would comfort her was to sleep in bed with me (and I was breast feeding), so when necessary, I'd go down to the spare room and carefully lay her in her own space, with one pillow and a thin blanket for me. But like a previous respondant, I liked having the co-sleeper there if I wanted it. She stayed in it for about 8 months, and then I started transitioning her to her own crib (she was very small).

Hi L.,
Congratulations on your first baby!
With my first, we used the Arms Reach co-sleeper. I loved it because it was like having the baby in bed with you, but kept her safe from blankets or other suffocation hazards.
I couldn't imagine putting the baby in another room. It would make breastfeeding so hard, plus I just like having my babies near me at night.
My husband and I are not big people, we sleep lightly and we don't move a lot in our sleep, so after the baby was three months old I felt it was safe to put the baby in bed with us. It worked perfectly for us and we never really had too much problem transitioning her to her own bed, but maybe that is unusual.
Now my second is 5 weeks old and even though I still have the co-sleeper next to the bed, I pretty much just keep her in bed with me. (A note about safety: One night I did wake up and her head had partly scooted under the pillow. It really scared me because I though what if I hadn't woken up and her head had gone completely under the pillow... frightening to think. It is probably best not to sleep with a pillow at all when a newborn is in the bed, but I put down a heavy changing mat that covers the pillow and goes under her body and mine so that there is nothing that she can slip under now. We also removed all heavy blankets from the bed.)
I still use the co-sleeper as a bassinet and changing table. It has wheels so you can move it anywhere around the house during the day. We also use it as a travel bed when we go stay with my Mother-in-Law. It has been a great buy for us.
Just as my general advice. We had a very small city apartment when we had our first baby so we didn't have space for most of the baby paraphernalia that most people get. We found that you don't really need 90% of it anyway.
Good luck with what ever you decide.
B.

I breast fed both of my children and the crib isn't the way to go at all. You will be getting up and down all night and it will be a disaster. I found having a co-sleeper to be too difficult to sleep with because my husband had to work and he wasn't getting any sleep due to being afraid of rolling on the baby. The pack and play took up a lot of room and was a task to fold and unfold when using/storing it. I found having a bassinet next to my side of the bed worked best. I have a few friends that have had children since and one of them is using my bassinet and they all have said that it is the way to go when breast feeding an infant for the first year. I hope this helps you with your decision. Best wishes for a healthy and happy baby.

I would definitely recommend a Pack n Play-its worth the money for travel purposes alone-plus they do have the bassinet option which feels a little cozier than the crib at first. And, you can have the PandP in the room with you. Co-sleeping wouldn't have worked for me because I worried that my bedding wasn't safe (which I can't sleep without, although I hear some people do), or that I might roll-over. I did try to get my little guy comfortable in his own sleeping space as early as I could, which I think was around two weeks. That said, I do know plenty of people who slept with their babies for several months and it worked great for them. Just keep in mind no matter what you plan ahead of time, the first 2-4 weeks are a bit of a blur-do your best to get as much rest as you can!

Use a bassinet or a pack n play with a bassinet attachment. Co-sleeping is VERY dangerous. Many reports come out each year of infant suffocation through co-sleeping.

baby's own crib in own room

When my son was born, our changing table came in from the store really late. So I had put alot of the clothes and supplies in his crib. When he came home, we had the pack and play set up with the bassinett and changing table. And it was very convienent. We had a few steps from the living room to the bedrooms, and ended up using a bassinet from there. We used the music/sound player from the pack and play for a really long time. Daily, until he was 8 months.

I was way to scared to even think of sleeping with my baby at that small, tiny age. I didn't want anything to happen to my bundle of joy.

Congrats and Good luck!

I used a bassinet with both of my boys. It was too convenient for nighttime feedings and diaper changes not too! It was also a comfort to have them close by when they were so little. I didn't want to make a habit of co-sleeping but I definitely enjoyed snoozing with my little guys when I could. Most of the time I would breast feed them in the bed and my husband would put them back in the bassinet when we would fall asleep. I think you might regret not having a place for the baby to sleep in your room with you if you decide to use the crib in the nursery. But if you have a really comfy chair in there you might not! The pack-n-play was one of my best investments. My husband and I love to go on weekend trips with and without the kids so having a portable crib for them was the best option. I would even set it up at home when I was cleaning the floors so they would stay out of trouble for a few minutes until I could finish.

I would wait on buying the crib unless you're sure you're going to put the baby in it right away - a lot of people buy them and either don't end up using them at all, or not for a long time because they're either co-sleeping or the baby is sleeping next to them in a pack n play.

Co-sleeping can be safe if it's done correctly. I did not intend to co-sleep in the beginning, but I couldn't stay awake with the baby getting up every hour or two to nurse.

I love the idea of the co-sleeper attached to your bed, I didn't do it because I wasn't willing to spend the money having already bought a pack n play (and needing the pack n play for travel, etc).

If you want a used pack n play in like new condition, I'm selling mine (I live in Queens).

Best of luck with the new baby!

Well, I have three children ranging in age from 10 (almost 11), 4 and 2 months. With Emily we had a crib and a bassinet but she ended up sleeping with us. With Ashley we got a travel pack and play with a bassinet in it. That worked great until she got too big and then she outgrew it. But it was great. This time I have a full size pack and play that I got on craigslist. It has the bassinet AND a place to change Abby's diaper. IT is definitely not a waste of money. While sometimes she does end up sleeping next to me, it doesn't happen often. IT's a lot safer to have her in a bassinet or pack and play than in bed with you. I am always worried if Abby ends up with us because my husband doesn't know she's there if he's sleeping already. Good luck with the baby and remember that you don't have to buy a new one. I paid $40 for the one I have.

You will definately get your money's worth out of a Pack N Play! My babies slept in my room in the basinet top of the Pack N Play for the first three months. I used it as a second changing table downstairs so I didn't have run up a flight of stairs for every dirty diaper. When they got bigger, they napped in it. I plonked them in there, knowing they'd be safe when I had to run to the bathroom or put in a load of laundry. It went with us when we went visiting friends for naptimes and overnights. I did not have a lot of baby 'gear' but I considered this essential!

L.,
the packnplay wasn't a waste of money at all. Not only did we use it every night till our daughter was three months (when we moved her to her room/crib), but anytime we travel we still use it (she will be two on 12/31).
Personally, I think it is better to have the p'n'p because then you have options. Our daughter slept with us some nights here or there, but we were also able to get more rest wo the worry of Rolling on her etc. I also know too many parents who at two or three years old their child is still sleeping with them bc it is something they have become accustomed to, making the transition harder. The transition from p'n'p to crib is an easier one, but if you co-sleep you can of course transition too. It really is what feels best to you. For us, we felt we slept better knowing she was right next to us & sleeping better meant I was a better parent for her the next day. I know other moms who slept better knowing their baby was right there next to them. It really is what you feel.
Idk if it is a possibility for you to get both, but if you choose co-sleep, you will probably end up with a p'n'p for travel anyhow. Have you looked into the product that hooks to the side of the bed, that could be the best of both worlds for you.
Whatever you chose to do will be a good decision for you. Best of luck.

Hi L.,
Congrats! I love co-sleeping. I am very fond of sleeping & I found it much easier to have the kids in the bed with me. I nursed & it was no problem to roll over & whip it out. I have a king size bed & we also have an Arm's Reach Co-sleeper attached to one side. I love the co-sleeper, it is similar to a pack-n-play but one side is lower so that it is level with the bed. It was nice to have the newborn in bed with me but not right in bed all night. It also gave me some comfort when the kids were older & rolling, that they would not roll off the bed, they would just roll into the sleeper. I still have mine up. I really think that it is worth the investment. I never even did a crib, I just went from co-sleeper/ co sleeping to a toddler bed.

Co-sleeping has a bad rep but really most of the incidents involve alcohol or med use.

Best of luck!

Hi L.,
We did both the pack and Play and co-sleeping. I found the Pack and Play very useful for the bassinet sized top, and the changing table that attaches. The underneath was great storage and it could be moved from room to room and taken to the grandparents house. Eventually, we would use the playpen bottom part as her crib when we went out of town and the playpen was also a safe place to put her with some toys when I had to leave the room for a moment. We used it until she exceeded the height and weight. It was well worth the money for us.

We slept with our daughter at night for the first six months or so and we loved it. During the day I would put her in the pack and play to nap after she fell asleep in my arms or nursing. It gave me a little freedom. We started to gradually transfer her into the crib at night at about 6 months old. It took some months before she could be put down awake and some more months before she slept through the whole night and sometimes she slept half in her crib and half with us...since she nursed at night for a while. It was a process but I would do it the same way again.

I had her in the bed with us until it wasn't pleasant anymore...The same with night nursing.

I think it will all become clear when you bring the baby home. I didn't think I would want to sleep with my daughter for so long but once we had her we wanted her close. It felt right. Other people feel the opposite.

Best of luck!
K.

1st don't have your baby sleep with you. It is dangerous and you can easily fall into a deep sleep and roll over. It has happen. Best way discussed this matter with your pediatrician and he will give you the best advice. Also many people have tag sale with baby item that they barely didn't use that can be re-use and limits your budget. Have fun with your new baby!

Congrats! I know this answer may not help you much, but you will just have to see what works for you and the baby. With my first, I fully intended to put him in a crib in his room. After he was born, I couldn't do it! We bought a co-sleeper that attaches to the side of the bed. That was very helpful for breastfeeding (although the baby slept with me a lot, sometimes because I'd fall asleep nursing him in our bed). In my experience with two babies, pack n' plays aren't as comfy, and are better for vacations/overnights at grandma's, etc. Also, you have to reach waaaay down to put a sleeping baby into a pack n' play--not ideal for your back, especially when you're tired, and not ideal for a baby who will startle easily and wake up! Having said that, if you're ever going to go anywhere overnight, a pack n' play will not be a waste of money. My son just stopped sleeping in there on trips, and he will be three next week.

In short, I would advise you to get a co-sleeper--they allow you to simply roll over and see the baby, which is great during the night (with the basinette I'd have to get up and then peek over the side to see how the baby was). If you don't use the co-sleeper (and even if you do), you can always sell it used later on craigslist or ebay. Same with a pack n' play of course (and you can also get yours the same way, which will save $).

Hope I helped? Good luck--you'll do great!

Pack&plays are great and you will probably use it a lot, not only for first weeks sleeping but also as a playpen and many of them even have a changing table that you can use in your family room, etc. They are convenient when you go on trips with the baby or even for days out in the backyard or park in summertime. It's definetly worth the investment. I would not advice having the baby with you in your bed, you don't want to add more stress to the few hours that you will be able to sleep. You'll need to rest and having the baby in the bed will not help. It is convenient to have him close, for those night breastfeedings, but with my second baby I found out that the trip to the nursery was worthwhile in exchange for better sleep for both, me and the baby. My son preferred his crib to a any other sleeping place from the very beginning and that allowed me to realize that is so much better this way. He would sleep longer hours because our noises won't bother him and I would also sleep better because I couldn't hear his every move, only when he actually cried and needed to be fed. A baby monitor will allow you to see and hear the baby without disturbing him and without even leaving your bed.

Hi L.,

Everyone has different preferences and so I'll share my experiences with you. I was given 2 pack 'n plays and I've never opened them up. In fact, I'm in the process of asking some friends if they can use either. Also, I breastfed for about 18 months. I used the crib for the first few weeks, but found that I got more sleep when I brought my son in the bed with me. I bought the "snugglenest" which he slept in on my bed. This worked really well for me. Good luck!!

Hi L.-

You're right-it is overwhelming! We thought we'd use the pack n play-and got it as a shower gift. We did put our daughter in it for naps for the first 2 months and then moved her to her crib (doctor recommended). Now we use it for tummy time (we have two dogs and it helps keep much of the dog hair off her!). We also plan to use it to travel. For sleeping, we had her in a cradle for the first 6 weeks. It was very handy having her next to the bed for those feedings! Co-sleeping was never an option for us but I know a few familes who did it and loved it. It really all depends on you and the expectations you have. As for the pack n play-I think they're great. Ours has a bug netting so we can use it outside as well. And they fold up quite nicely.
Whatever you decide-good luck and congratulations!

Hi L.,

Congrats on the soon-to-arrive little one!

I had the same concern as you did and got the Arm's Reach Mini Convertible Co-sleeper Bassinet. I also got the Secure Sleeper Ultra Sleep Positioner (which has a bit of an incline which prevents spit-up/ reflux in babies when they sleep). Very, very happy with both these purchases.

Essentially, we would swaddle our baby, but her on the Sleep Positioner, which was inside her Arm's Reach bassinet.

I was a little apprehensive of having my baby sleep in the same bed as me because of SIDS risk etc, therefore the Arm's Reach Co-sleeper worked out well. We used it as a bassinet and because it had mesh around it and low height, I could peek and check on my little on at night while she slept. And as she got more neck control, she too could peek at us for security.

These items lasted us 5 months, after which she was ready for her crib.

Hope this helps.

However you do it (bed sharing, side car, crib/cradle/other bed somewhere in the parents' bedroom), I think co-sleeping is the way to go. I really don't understand why people put their babies in another room to sleep. Babies want to and need to be with their mothers (and dads). And parents want to be with their babies. It seems more natural to me to co-sleep. Bed sharing is controversial, but those of us who do it, love it. There are ways to make it safe, like having a queen or king sized bed; not using heavy blankets; and not being under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Try researching it at www.mothering.com and make an informed decision. If you are not comfortable with that, try a co-sleeper bed sidecar, like ones made by Arms Reach. Also, some people use a pack and play as the infant bed for a while -- it certainly is versatile. For us, co-sleeping has been an important part of our son being content all night, which means we are content all night! I think it is a big part of why is he such a happy, confident, healthy, robust person.

And you are right -- there is an overload of products. Babies R Us is overwhelming. All the stores and advertisements made me feel like I had to buy all this stuff to be a good parent, but when I went to the stores, I couldn't afford a lot of it and didn't like most of it. Keep in mind, your baby doesn't really need that much: a place to sleep, some diapers, few clothes, a couple of blankets. He/she needs a lot your breast milk and your love and attention. It's pretty simple. There are a lot of gadgets that can be helpful, but, again, does your baby really need them? Do you have a sling, wrap, or carrying pack of some kind? Those are great for enabling to you hold your baby and be hands free at the same time. The Ergo baby carrier has been great for us. It's expensive, but worth it in the long run.

If you have any questions or otherwise want to talk some more, feel free to email me.

Hi L.,

Babies are OK sleeping in their own crib, however it is a lot easier to have them nearby while they are so small. I used the arms reach co-sleeper. I used it as a bassinet, I didn't attach it to my bed and it worked great. I would not recommend sleeping in the same bed as a newborn unless you have a snuggle nest. Its a mat with sides that you put on the bed so you can't roll on to the baby. I don't think there is anything wrong with bed sharing with an older child, but there are other things to consider then.

I never got a pack n play, they didn't look comfortable to me and we wanted a full sized playpen anyway.

Congratulations and Good Luck,
R.

Hi L., I'm a big fan of co-sleeping, and I'm also a child psychologist by training. My son was adopted at the age of one, and he was extremely disorganized. I feel that the co-sleeping helped bring him back to life, and now he has a rep as the happiest kid in town! There are a series of books by the Sears family about "attachment parenting" I highly recommend. J.

Arms reach co-sleeper..the non mini. Used with both my kids. The one year old still co-sleeps with me. I breast fed both...first one to 2.5 and still breast feeding second one. Great purchase.

Wow, there is a lot of responses out there, I didn't read them all so apoligize if repetative. I stayed away from co-sleeping, but eventually it happened when she was about 8-10 months and had a hard time breaking it so stay away if you want to keep her in the crib later. When I was breastfeeding though there were many nites we would fall asleep together, to me that isn't really cosleeping when its only an hour or two between feedings.

I purchased a snuggle nest and loved that in the bassinet of the pack-n-play and then when we moved her to the crib it went too for a while. I like to think it maid the change easier for her. And for the fist few months I would wrap the blanket around the snugglenest and tuck it under. (she didnot like to be swaddled).

Best of Luck and remember do what feels best for you.

My son slept in his pack n play for the first 4 mnths... pack n plays are definitely not a waste of money. doctors dont recommend co sleeping because they say the baby can fall, and plus the baby will be more dependent on you than he/she should be if they sleep with you. I definitely recommend the pack n play.. and when you use the crib you have the pack n play for trips or bringing you can bring it when you go to someones house for awhile and the baby wants to nap.

Hi L., congratulations and if it's any consolation, you are not alone. If you ever need advice or recommendations, I would be happy to share! Oh how I wish I knew 3 months ago what I've since learned... :)

We opted for the Pack n' Play -- the fancy one with the bassinet, changing table, and vibrations/sounds -- because my mom was staying with us in the second bedroom (nursery) and because we were traveling for the first 6 weeks after the baby was born.

However, if I do have another baby, I will opt for a co-sleeper (one of those things that attaches to the side of the bed) for the first 6 weeks. Reason being, our baby did not sleep well pretty much the first two months. This is common -- remember these words! Since sleep is so precious for you, I think it is totally worthwhile to have the baby at arm's reach initially so you can reach over and soothe her when she just needs a loving caress, and also you can just stick her on the boob for all the night nursing. However, I strongly urge you NOT to let the baby sleep directly in the bed. It is just so dangerous, especially when you're exhausted. Plus you'll sleep so lightly for fear of rolling over onto him/her. The attachable co-sleeper is an excellent alternative.

Our real crib is the Stokke Sleepi and the baby slept soundly in it from the get-go (a few nights in the beginning, and then exclusively by Week 6). She LOVES the Stokki. She seemed to HATE the Pack 'N Play and could only lay in it for brief increments when the vibration was on. Unfortunately, the vibration only lasts like 15 mins, so I was constantly jumping up to turn it on all night. Literally. If I didn't, the baby would wake and it would take forever to console her again.

Again, if you want any other recommendations, give a shout.

Be well,
S.

I would definitely recommend the co-sleeper. I had to buy the mini co-sleeper due to lack of space in my room, but I LOVE it. If you have the room I would Spend the extra money and get the regular sized one. I believe the regular sized ones convert to a play yard as well. Check out the arms reach website.

You're going to get tons of advice on this one, and ultimately will do what works best for your family once the baby arrives. Get ready now-- even the best plans can end up out the window once the baby actually arrives!

My twin boys both slept in their own cribs in their own room from the very beginning. That was our plan from the start, and our pediatrician agreed that everyone would sleep better this way. It worked for us, though since I was recovering from a c-section my husband had a lot of work getting up and changing diapers and bringing in the boys for nursing several times a night. Yes, you can nurse exclusively and still have your baby sleep in another room. There were plenty of times that I fell asleep while nursing, so just make sure the baby is securely propped on a pillow (or whatever works best for you) just in case you end up all sleeping together for a while anyway. :-)

As a side note, because we started with the crib from the beginning we never had any big problems with getting them to nap or go to bed.

Good luck!

My son slept in his crib from day one. We have a door separating our bedrooms which we kept open so he was actually very close to my bed and getting up to breast feed was no inconvenience at all. I would not get into the habit of sleeping with your infant in your bed. I don't think it benefits the child in any way and in fact can be dangerous and increases the risk of SIDS.

hi L.
pack n plays are great if you have a 2 story house and want a place for the baby on both levels or you will be traveling overnight often. Otherwise if you are breastfeeding and feel comfortable to have your baby in your bed in the beginning that is definitely the easiest and most economic way. :)
Keep in mind too that you could always try without one in the beginning but if you feel you need one im sure there will be a willing set of hands to run to babies r us and pick one up.