Not Noticing a Dirty Diaper

My boys couldn't have cared less whether they had a loaded diaper. The disposable diapers kept them very comfortable. They both potty trained right after their third birthdays and only took a few days to train. I took the diapers away completely for training, and without the diapers they were aware of their bodily functions.

My boys didn't care at that age. They did care when they were a little older. Both potty trained when they were about 3 1/2.

normal.. but you can start pointing it out to him.. say ... billy look your diaper is dirty.. there is poopoo in it.. lets change it so you will be more comfortable. here is a nice clean dry diaper... isn't that nice..

start talking about dry and wet when you change him.. this will help move him toward training..

note.. my son was not interested in training at all but at 2 years 10 months... I decided it was time.. put him in cotton training pants and he was trained in 3 days.. boys do not necessarily act like they are ready..

I think 'normal' depends on how he was raised. If he is used to not having to worry about a dirty diaper, then he isn't going to change his mind set just because he has aged a bit. It's what he is used to.

My DD was NEVER allowed to be in a dirty diaper... I would change her at the first sign that she was wet. So she never got used to the sensation. Once she was able to support herself sitting up, I would sit her on a training potty when she wet/soiled her diaper, and talk about the poop and potty in a fun voice for a minute or two. When she learned to walk around 9 months, I took her out of disposable diapers, and put her into training pants with incontinence liners in them. Same concept with the training potty. She wasn't even a year old before she started coming to me as she was in the process of soiling herself. By the time she was 18 months, she was letting me know before she needed to go... even though she didn't have the control to 'hold it' until she was a bit older. (I later learned that the 'technique' I used is similar to something called 'elimination communication'.)

I know my younger stepbrother was not potty trained at all when our families became blended. He was 3, and was not bothered in the least running around in a diaper that sagged down to his knees. My dad and step-mom worked, and I moved back home to help them with the kids. (They were all boys, at newborn, 3, 5, 8, 12, and 16...) Because I was home with him all day, it fell to me to potty train him. It took about 2 days of bathroom naked time, then another week of only underwear, before he finally realized his control of his body. Then it took about 2 week to teach him to use the potty exclusively. After that, he still had an occasional accident, but only rarely... which is kind of to be expected anyway.

For your son, I would recommend teaching him about his body functions. Take him in the bathroom, and let him run around buck naked. Take some toys and books, and just hang out. (Maybe push a little extra fluid, so he will have to 'go' faster... When he does go, pop him onto the seat, and get happy and excited. "Look! You went POTTY!!!! GOOD JOB!!!" If you believe in rewards, give him whatever you deem appropriate. (I know a lot of mothers tend to advise against food rewards though...)

Or, you might try putting him in the 'cool alert' pull ups, that supposedly get cold feeling when they get wet.

Just SOMETHING that makes him realize that going potty is an action that his body tells him about. Once he realizes that his body gives him the urge to go ahead of time, and that he can control when it comes out, potty training just becomes a matter of forming a new habit.

I don't want this to come off the wrong way but this is how I see it:

for 2.5 years your child has been in a dirty diaper. As a baby, he cried when it was dirty. As a toddler, he cried when it was dirty. As a toddler he most likely even put up a battle over having to wear a diaper. But you kept putting it on him, teaching him that dirty diapers are OK, and now you wonder why a dirty diaper doesn't bother him?

have you taught him anything about his body functions? about pee and poop, where it goes, etc. the difference between wet and dry? I taught my oldest two these things starting around 12 months. By 18 months, they put their pee in the potty, by 21 months their poop in the potty, and they night trained. My point: you have to teach kids these things. Older kids notice because around 3 they become social and start to care what their peers are doing. Prior to three, they don't usually notice these things. However, if a 2 year old sees another 2 year old using a potty, usually they want to use one too. It's all about exposure and opportunities to learn about the potty.

I don't think they ever cared or noticed, and mine were always changed right away.
But *I* cared and noticed, which is why I started potty training pretty early (by US standards anyway) right around age two.
Nothing forced, just started putting them on the pot, every half hour or so, lots of praise, real underwear, a few messes of course, but they got the hang of it after a few weeks.
Yes, it's an effort on your part in the beginning, but it's really not much different than training a puppy. They just need to get USED to it, conditioned is what it is, really.
If you wait until your kid WANTS to use the potty? You could be waiting a while. I can't imagine my three or four year old soiling themselves all day and night but many parents see that as "normal" so whatever :-(

When my son was ready, he was ready and potty trained within a couple of days. He just didn't care up until then. I tried before three and simply gave up because he wasn't having it. But when his sister started kindergarten, he decided suddenly that he was ready (he was about 3 and 2 months) and by the end of the week, he was done. It'll happen - as my mother in law says, none of them go to kindergarten in diapers.

Some just don't care - they don't want to interrupt their playing.
Many kids just aren't trained till around 3 1/2 yrs old but by then training is quick and relatively easy.
By then they can pull pants down, wipe and pull them back up, flush and wash hands.

I didn't even have a bathroom in my 2 year old classroom. Kids just aren't ready to potty train until they're 3. When you wait until their older it's really easy.

Completely normal. 2.5 is young for potty training - not unheard of, but it's unlikely. Boys are often later to develop in this area. Mine was nearly 4 before he was reliably dry. It's frustrating but there's nothing you can do to rush it - provide a potty and some books on using it (keep a little bin or basket in the bathroom but also read them at other times, no pressure, just information). Let him know that, when he's ready, he'll be able to use the potty and not have those diapers.

Being verbal is wonderful in many ways but it has nothing to do with the sensation of being wet or dirty or even of needing to go.

There is a difference between not noticing and not caring. He may very well be aware that he is wet or dirty, but just not care. That is perfectly normal.

My son knew if he had wet or soiled himself, but he wouldn't ask me to help change him. Like other things in his toddlerhood, it was up to me to teach him what was expected. And I expected him to learn where pee and poop are supposed to go, and how to get it there before it went in his pants. We started somewhere close to age 2. He was fully potty trained well before 3. And I never had any "control" issues.

The only issues he had was, like anything else, if he was doing something fun, he wouldn't want to stop to go to the bathroom. Just like he wouldn't want to stop for bedtime. Or naptime. Or to go to the store. You have to teach them what the proper priorities are... make it fun to please you and they will. :)

Night time is a whole different thing, though. That is totally a physiological thing and has nothing whatsoever to do with their desire to stay dry or wake up and go potty during the night. Nothing. Unless you have a child who wakes, and refused to get out of the bed due to fear of the dark or something. Normally, it is that they don't wake up before they wet. Their body hasn't figured out or grown enough to signal them strongly enough to wake them in advance. Time will solve night time. But daytime? Just start teaching him what is appropriate and encourage him. Celebrate when he succeeds. Help him clean up when he doesn't.

My daughter is 4 1/2, and I bet you if I put her back in a diaper she would stop going to the potty. She never cared about wet or dirty diapers. When she was three, I finally had the time to potty train her and it took two weeks to have no pee pee accidents, a little longer for poop and about 6 months to get rid of night time diapers. When you are ready to potty train make sure you have the time to commit to it. I wanted to potty train earlier, but we were moving and I was on bedrest for 8 weeks. If you are ready to start potty training, I did the sit on the potty every 10 minutes after 2 days, I up it to 15 minutes, than 20 and when we got to 30 minutes apart, I went to the potty watch which my daughter loved. It plays a song when it's time to go potty. It really worked for us, but if I didn't start potty training, she wouldn't of done it.

Dear BookWormMom:

Wake Up! Your child is interested in what you are interested. You need to teach him hygiene. Just like a puppy goes outside every hour, so does the child need to condition himself to know when he has to go. All 3 of my children were potty-trained by 2 years (give or take a month).

Suggestions:
Always change the diaper as soon as it is wet or dirty.

First thing in the morning, jump out of bed and put him on the potty. Does he wake up with a dry diaper.....we are interested in saving diaper money so that we can go out and by the "big boy" pants. Let him pick it out or if you know what he wants, get it for him and show it to him as a "reward" for clean diapers and being a "Big Boy".

"have Potty Chair Will Travel"....it goes everywhere or you stay close to home.

After every meal, you take the child to the potty. You sit there with him. This is excellent time for reading a book, playing games, learning the alphabet, math, etc. His potty chair has to become the most important thing in his life as he needs to make the "Big Deal" to "Big Boy" pants.
I would get exstatic every time one of my cherubs went potty. They thought this was a big deal....and it was. Do you want to be embarrassed that your child wants to unload in a restaurant or just anywhere. There is a proper time and place for everything. It is time for bring him into your circle of "politeness" and for him to tell you when he needs to go. If you tried your very best and he does not want to cooperate....I had one of those....you watch him take off his dirty diaper himself and after once or twice, he will never want to do that again! Mind you, this is a last resort. I only had one who tested me and she only did it one time. After that.....never again.
You must know your child and your child must know that this is very important!.

Good Luck!

My two year old does not care if she is dirty either. She does not like to stop to change, too busy :)

My son at that age never carried one whit whether he was in a poopy diaper or not, or if it was wet or not. He potty trained just fine later, when he was ready. :)

My nephew couldn't have cared less if his diaper was wet or dirty if he was involved with something else. He didn't want to stop playing long enough to either use the toilet or be changed.
He KNEW his diaper was nasty - he just didn't care.

My older son was very verbal at 2 1/2 but he didn't notice either. He knew he'd get changed, I'm sure. I waited until he was 3 to train him. It was at the same time all the 3 year olds at daycare were also being trained.

I don't think that your son is really ready, that's all.

Perhaps you could initiate conversations like "You have a poopy/wet diaper, honey." Then see what he says. At the point that he talks about it, it will help prepare him.

I kind of lucked out. By the time my son was 8 months he didn't care for the feel of the mush in his diaper and wanted it off. So we went the potty seat way. He would go on the potty or in the chair. It took him until about 3 and a half before we got the wet diaper gone. He had one accident while I was in hospital with baby sister.

So it really depends on the child and how they feel about wet/poopy diaper.

Just know when it is done it is done and you just have to remind them before you go shopping to go potty.

the other S.

It is surprising that he is very verbal yet doesn't ask to be changed, my three hated it and let me know if I hadn't noticed. My youngest was fully trained by 27 months, had been ready at 19 months but I'd thought him too young to train then. I was wrong :)

Here's some things you can be working on now, before you decide to potty train your son -
http://domanmom.com/2012/07/things-you-can-do-with-your-b...

my 2.5 year old randomly will tell me he did it, just minutes afterwards. Usually its his visual clues that let me know he is filling the diaper. He hides and zones out. I know he is pooping. He is good now about peeing in the potty but poop is just not happening yet. If he sneaks a number 2 by me.. he will tell me pretty quick about it because he doesnt like the feeling of it. Every so often we get an out of control filled diaper that sneaks by me and he gets a little rash but thats rare.