Need Advice About Tithing

I completely understand your situation and frustration with it. I attend church with my 4 children, but my husband stays at home. I don't work so I don't have an income of my own to tithe. I do, however, get a household allowence to pay for food, clothing, neccessities, and anything else that I need to pay for. I tithe out of that money. My husband does not believe in tithing 10% of his income. If I came to him and said I wanted to take money away from investments and our kids college fund to tithe at church I might as well go a head a sign the divorce papers. LOL! I do find myself not being able to give back on some weeks so I would add it to another week. I do know that when I have tithed with my heart and not out of guilt, God has carried my through those weeks when I did not know if I could make the money stretch or not. I do the best that I can and I have made peace with it. God knows that I am not perfect, but do the best with what I have. I hope that you can find peace with what ever decision you make and comfort knowing that God will get you through it.

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Hi K.,

I come from an other country, the tithing thing is here in the US, it doesn't exist in all countries or parts of the world, every religion is different and every country too.
I believe there is only one God for all of them....
Hope it makes you feel better!
Good luck,
M. Abadie
www.MyKidsFirst.com

1 mom found this helpful

We are baptist and I know a lot of people call us 'money hungry' but I swear God has provided WAY more for us when obeying his Word and tithing. Tithing is meant to be an action of the heart attitude. You tithe because HE deserves it. Because HE is awesome and perfect and Holy. And because you know he is all of that, you know he won't leave you high and dry and without money to pay your bills. We used to make $1400 a month. When doing the budget each month, I always got scared because tithing 10% was a lot of money. We've never, ever paid a bill late. We don't have credit card debt. We've never gone without a meal, diapers or formula. Sure, money gets tight, but we are never without. I feel that BECAUSE we tithe, my husband got a FANNNTASSSTICCCC paying job with even better insurance, we are able to comfortably afford for me to stay home with our kids, etc. I kinda feel like not tithing simply because you're scared (which I agree, it is a scary/expensive thing!) is basically telling God he's great in all these other areas but you just don't feel he's big enough to take care of his 'children'. Wouldn't you kinda feel a little...slided? Especially if you were literally PERFECT?! Again, I know it's a big, scary undertaking, but know he will always provide...and TRUST ME, girl...sometimes it's in the weirdest ways. But the money is always there and the bills are always taken care of. Good luck!!

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K.-

I too have these issues. I want so much to tithe, but my husband, the supposed to be spiritual head of the household, says "it just doesn't make sense on paper". That always rips my heart out. I know God will provide but he doesn't have the faith to try it. Our pastor has gone as far as telling the congregation that if we don't believe God will provide, he, the pastor will hold our money for a while and if we happen to need it because God isn't providing, then he will give it back to us. He said he has done that for several people in the church and no one has ever come back needing it. GOD provided! I don't know why my husband can't grasp that, but I will continue to pray for his heart to be changed and dedicate my time as much as possible to the church and others. I know that God knows my heart and will not punish me for something that is out of my control. I will not go against my husbands wishes, because I know that is not being a godly wife. So, hang in there. It gets a little easier to deal with, but never completely easy. Just keep praying. God Bless!

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Here's how I see it. Everything we have belongs to GOD. He provides us with everything. Yes, we go out and get jobs, work our behinds off, and so forth. But we owe it all to him. All he asks for is 10%, and he will give in return tenfold. I know sometimes things get rough, but here's the deal, if you give your 10% he will always make a way. Especially if you are putting all your trust in him. Believe me, it was hard to tithe there for a while when we were not making enough to make ends meet. But we decided that GOD comes first, and we needed to trust in him that he would provide. If we were being faithful to him and his word, he would in return be faithful to us. And now we are reaping what we sowed for so long. We are not exactly where we want to be financially, but through these hard times we've realized that if we remain faithful and trust in him he will take care of us no matter what. Our money is best spent helping other people...well at least 10% of it, anyway. GOD REALLY smiles down on us when we go above and beyond and give more than the 10%...whether it be giving extra money or volunteering our time, etc. And it just feels awesome to help people, too.

If you read in Malachi 3:8-12, GOD asks us to test him by tithing, and see what blessings he will bestow upon us. It's the only thing he asks us to test him on. Interesting, huh?

Our pastor just gave a sermon in November about tithing. It was not your typical "give us your money" speech that some churches give. Here's the link to our church's website
http://www.rivercentral.org/app/ There's a box on the home page where you can listen to past sermons, and the title of the message is "You Want Me To Do What?" Very awesome in that he was not pushy at all, and put it in a really tasteful way. If you have time, you should listen. :)

Have a GREAT day!
Liz.

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God knows your heart. He knows how badly you want to tithe and do the right thing. Talk with your husband and see how he feels about tithing your income only. Honor your husband and follow his lead, even if it's not the answer you want. Proverbs 21:1 says "The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD, [Like] the rivers of water; He turns it wherever He wishes." In this situation, your husband is the king. Pray for God to change his heart about tithing. If you do that, God will bless you and your family, just for being a good wife.

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I have, and really still am, in much the same boat. You are torn between two things that you know are God's will - supporting the church and submitting to your husband. At this point, I would follow your husband's wishes. It is not a sin to not tithe. In fact, I have seen some debate over whether "tithing" actually applies to the New Testament church. Acts says that shared what they had with each other, not that they gave 10% or even "first-fruits" as the Old Testament refers to.

I know that my husband would not allow me to "tithe" although now he does allow me to give generously. So I give what I do have - my skills and time. I am sure that if you call your children's director or pastor at church, they probably have half a million little projects going on that you could help with from home. And even more "little things" that you could help with in the office - copying, typing, or even disinfecting the nursery toys every week.

And if you can't even do those things, dedicate yourself to praying for the church and each member of the leadership on a regular basis.

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Oh I feel you! I struggled with the idea of tithing when I was younger (I was pretty cynical about the corruption of church) and then one Sunday the pastor did a sermon on it that completely changed my perspective. He talked about how we aren't tithing to people or a specific church building, but to God, and it doesn't really matter what that money is used for, and I became a devout tither, even when I didn't really have the money. Of course, God always provided, which reinforced my devotion to the importance of it. However, when my husband and I got married, he didn't want to do it. (He doesn't go to church with me.) He was also cynical and didn't want to hear about the difference in tithing to church or to God. So I suggested we give to a charity instead which he was ok with, but he also didn't agree about the amount - he didn't think "tithe" meant 10%. He said we could give to charity when we had enough money and could afford it. Which of course is the opposite of what should be done - giving of the first fruits, not the leftovers. The argument got heated, and I told him I was going to tithe whether he wanted me to or not (which I shouldn't have said), and he got offended because he thought I didn't think his opinion about our finances counted, and I felt badly and gave in and stopped tithing from our main account. I don't know how your finanaces are set up, but we have one joint checking account and we each have our own checking accounts. I work full time and that check goes into the joint account, but I also have a part time job, and that goes into my personal account. That's the money I tithe from. (Although, to be honest, I haven't been going to church since our baby girl was born. She's 5 months old and it's hard for me to take her by myself. That's a whole different post topic though!) Anyway, you might talk to him about if you each get $50 or something from your paychecks to do with as you please. It won't be the full 10% yet, but maybe you can gradually increase it. Good luck!