Motivation!! - Chicago,IL

I had great success with Weight Watchers a few years back -- my husband too, inadvertantly, just by changing the ingredients we used and portion sizes. I was very anti-diet and very against calorie counting and unhealthy practices. WW's plans are very flexible, allow you to eat the types of foods you want to eat without a lot of analysis for that structure you need (you'll be surprised what mistakes you're making now that you aren't even aware of!) and also works in physical activities. It involves self-awareness, not offering up pre-packaged non-thought.

It's VERY hard the first week, and slightly less hard the second week, and by the third week seems very easy. I was surprised. A few friends and I did it at the same time and we all were very successful. It's a lifestyle change, but a gradual one, and it gives you the control the whole time!

Good luck!!!

P.S. - One thing to remember: It took a while to get the 30 pounds, and it will take some time to take it back off. Forget "getting motivated" for the upcoming events because you're setting yourself up for failure and you're not going to be able to lose everything in that time. Think about it in the long term; you're going to feel so great after the first 5 or 10 pounds go away that it will be easy to get yourself motivated. :)

I think some group support and guidance would be very helpful for you-I would look into weight watchers. They have a proven record and alot of people love them. I also agree with the suggestion for hypno-therapy or some kind of therapy to help you work through your grief. You used food for comfort but haven't cleared the sadness, etc. Good luck to you!

A great way to start is maybe to take your baby for a stroll when you have the time to roam your neighbor hood if possible. Or you could always have a bag packed with your gym clothes available. Making the first step is always the hardest. I really loved Weight Watchers, it was so informational and life-oriented versus others programs. If you live int eh Western Suburbs, try a fitness group called Fit Force. The guy who runs the program is awesome. There are different level of groups, walkers, intermediate, and runners. I wish you the best with this and I know you will get when the push to move when you feel it is right. BEst Of LUck.... T.

Hi R.,
I found that Weight Watchers really works. You can eat anything; you just have to be aware of how much you eat. It's a plan that you can stay on without feeling like you're on a diet. I've found, personally, it's what I eat that matters more than how much I work out. Try dieting first to get a kick start and then add in the gym workouts. You may feel motivated by losing a few pounds that first week ...and drink water!! It will keep your hands / mouth busy and you will feel full. I hope this helps! Good luck!

have you looked into sparkpeople.com? They have a website that's free and gives you meal plans, etc to follow. I personally would recommend weight watchers, but that obviously isn't free. Maybe the money would be motivation though to really get the weight off.

This is a repeat recommendation, but I found weight watchers online to be easy to use and effective in helping me lose the "last 10 pounds". I never attended meetings and logged everything I ate and all my exercise online. It probably took about 20 minutes a day to use the website, but the points system worked for me. It was also easier than I thought it would be to figure out the website and make the entries. Good luck!

Weight watchers is great to get you started, but it can be expensive if you aren't motivated (about $40 per month on their cheapest plan). My girlfriend turned me on to a website www.sparkpeople.com. it's free and has meal plans if you want to use them.

I know for myself that if I am stressed, I can't loose the weight. Don't pressure yourself. You are not the same person you were all those years ago. You'll get there and you'll be suprised that almost no one looks the way they want to at those reunions. Good luck!
C.

R.-- it's not free, but I just joined Weight Watchers, and I love it. I bought a month's membership online-- I get to use the online tools, which I love. I'm learning how to eat healthily and to have some structure. I think you'd love it, too, if you gave it a try! The meetings are helpful, too-- lots of good tips and advice. Good luck!

R.,
Congrats on the baby boy and I'm sorry for the loss of your parents. I think you're stuck. You may still be mourning and subconsciously feel as if your need your parents to help you figure out what to do, completely understandable. I find EFT (emotional freedom technique) to be a great way to overcome emotional blocks and help people move forward. For more info along with great eating advice, visit www.mercola.com and www.emofree.com. Best of health to you.
N.

Hi! First of all, I am so sorry for the loss of your parents. I cannot even imagine what that must have been like. You certainly deserve to feel healthy and good about yourself, so it is great that you are taking these steps toward exercise and nutrition.

As far as losing the weight, I went through something similar in the past - I needed to get motivated to lose about 20 lbs. So I understand the frustration at getting started! The first step is always the hardest. The whole process is in front of you and it seems like a lot to tackle, especially with our other responsibilities of being mothers, wives and business owners (I own one as well).

So, how to take that first step?? This may sound really lame or a little elementary, but honestly what got me to get off my butt were cute work-out outfits! Ok, so that sounds reeeeallly superficial and vain, but it is so true! Seriously - buy yourself a couple of cute exercise outfits that make you want to get dressed for the gym. Two of my favorite websites for this are www.athleta.com and www.titlenine.com. And get yourself a great pair of cross-trainers. Honestly, getting dressed for the gym was the hardest part. I found that once I did that much, the motivation started coming to me. I was in my gym clothes - so it was time to go to the gym! The cute clothes also made me feel good about myself - and this is really the key to successfully losing weight. You may think that you need to lose the weight in order to raise your self-esteem, but actually it is the opposite. You need to start raising your self-esteem first, then the rest will come. When you feel good about yourself, you want to keep doing more for yourself. Seeing that cute image in the mirror before heading to the gym will help. I swear!

As for food, ugh, this is always the hardest part for me because I love to eat! So I googled things like "how to lose 10 lbs" or "eating healthy" and I got meal plans along with oodles and oodles of great easy recipes. My husband lost weight in the process too and he wasn't even trying! I kept things simple for breakfast (a whole grain frozen waffle or cottage cheese & fruit) and lunch (one of my new faves is Boca Burgers - 1 minute in the micro and they're not half bad!), and then I'd use my arsenal of recipes for dinner. On the weekends, I treated myself with nice meals and wine - life is short!

Once I got going, it got easier and easier every day. Before I knew it, my jeans were looser and people were commenting on how good I looked. From that point, the motivation to continue on just got easier and easier. And I added a few more cute outfits to my wardrobe as a reward ; )

Hope this helps! And good luck!

I found an extremely great book 'You, on a Diet'. They have a website too, www.realage.com It's not just recipes, it's a change of eating habits and a small exercise schedule. It's very informative about how your body digests and uses certain foods. That was motivation for me. And once my eating habits started to change I felt like exercising. And once you get past that first couple of days, you almost look forward to it. The recipes in the book are really good and it's not a diet, it's just healthy eating. So, the whole family starts to eat better and there's nothing better then a baby learning to eat healthy from the start. Good Luck!

Forget about the weight; your issues are bigger and more important than that. It sounds as if you are dealing with loss and some depression, which is why you are not motivated.

Instead of thinking about weight, just focus on a healthy lifestyle. Look on exercising not as a chore or something you must do to get to a certain size or weight, but as something you should do to take care of yourself, because you're worth it. Same thing with diet. You deserve good food and you and your family deserve for you to be healthy, so eat a healthy diet - there are plenty of plans out there, but really it's just lean meats and fish, fruit in the morning with whole-grain cereal or bread, and a salad at night with a dinner that's not too heavy and not too late. The rest will fall into place - or not - but either way you'll feel so much better and your mind will be in a better place to deal with your life. The weight is external; the "you" is internal and that's the part you need to take care of.

Some of us do gain weight and look different after we've had kids. In my case, I had two babies after 40 and of course I don't look like I did when I was 20. So what? DON'T stress about the wedding or the reunion - start treating yourself right and get something to wear to them that makes you feel wonderful. That will go a long way toward making you feel better. Why should you look the same as you used to? - you aren't the same person, you're better, and if you felt it, you would look it!!

This morning I was listening to the radio 93.9 and Richard Simmons was on the air. He said "love your body" and excerise everyday and eat small portions. Forget those diets that everyone talks about. I hope this helps you! Happy Mother's Day!!

I totally understand what you are going through witht the weight issue. I ended up joining Weight Watchers online it has really helped me, I can eat what I want and not go over my points and feel full plus you get extra points for working out ect.. I have lost 22lb in 3 months and I have to be honest I don't work out like I should maybe 40min two times a week.

I would recommend Weight Watchers with the gym, also I have heard a buddy system is another great way to get your self motivated do you have a friend that can go to the gym with you this might help get you going. Good luck

A.
29 year old full time working mom of 3 year old daughter, with a great PhD husband who is now also in his 3rd year of medical school.

Hi R.,
I have had that 30lb problem before. I tried the gym, worked out consistently for a month. Lost nothing...then got to lazy to continue. Here's what did work for me. I finally just joined weight watchers. I couldn't believe how fast the weight came off. Within 3 months I had lost it all. That was two years ago. Now I gain back about 5-8 lbs every winter and go back on the weight watchers diet and lose in about two- weeks. I alway use the point system when I go on and write down everything I eat. The first few days are hard and it takes a bit a time to figure out how many points your favorite foods are--but it really works! My whole family went on and it worked for all of them.
Good luck.
J.

Hi R.,
Sometimes when you have this big goal in front of you it becomes so intimidating that it keeps you from getting started. First, get a personal trainer 3 times a week for a month. This way you set up a schedule & it forces you to go work out. Once the month is up you can continue the schedule without the expense of a trainer. Second, buy the book Skinny Bitch & read it. It's not a big book so it won't take long to read. It was an eye opener for me & I have totally changed my eating habits. I lost weight & so did my husband. The best part is that it is not a diet; it's a change in your eating behavior. The Skinny Bitch authors have also created a cook book to help you with menu ideas.

What gym did you join? Maybe you need a workout partner - someone to meet you there?

K.