JFF: Best Excuse for Skipping Family Thanksgiving

Vicious stomach bug... you know... the food poisoning variety. Something you ate late in the day on Wednesday. You are still hanging close to the bathroom and sleeping on and off.
Thanks, but I'll have to make do at home. I'll probably sleep through it anyway. And if it isn't just food poisoning, I wouldn't want to share this with all of you!

;)
Fun question.

We are exhausted and decided we need to rest, so we are going to just stay home and do a low key Thanksgiving this year. Can't wait to see all of you at Christmas!

I'm so with you! I keep thinking that there is no way I want to go to dinner!

I'm tempted to just not go and say it's because of the baby. Hubby says I can't, but maybe he will change his mind when I send him and the other kids to my brothers without me!

We may all just come down with the flu.

Explosive diarrhea is the #1 best excuse for anything you want to get out of doing.

"Hi, Aunt Millie....yeah, I'm not going to be able to make it to Thanksgiving dinner. See, what happened was I decided to dye my hair myself instead of paying $100 for a professional. The box said 'cool chestnut brown' but when I was done my hair was whorehouse black. I know! I looked like Mortisha but not in the sexy way! So, I put my hair in a scarf and went back to Wal-Mart to get a color to lighten it up. I didn't know that I needed to wait a couple of weeks so I put the color on as soon as I got home. It said 'medium golden brown.'" PAUSE - SNIFFLE "My hair is orange Aunt Millie! Like, trick or treat/great pumpkin orange!" SNIFFLE "I can't go to work/church/mommy and me/school like this! I found a hair dresser that works out of her home that will actually see me ON THANKSGIVING and for $200 she'll do a color correction. As much as I hate to miss dinner I'm going to take the appointment because it's that or shave my head and I just wasn't meant to be a Krishna! Give everyone my love."

Tell your family you've always wanted to see what it was like to be judged and shunned by them if you don't show up for Thanksgiving.

I take it you are single? Because you only mention "me,myself and I".

Soooo, if that is the case. Tell your family you have a hot date on Thanksgiving.

They don't have to know it is with Mr. Netflix :)

Then..you will be the saucy topic of conversation all through their Turkey dinner and they will be anticipating meeting your special someone soon.

Let us know what Mr. Netflix entertained you with all day on Turkey Day...I am looking for some good fliks to put in my queue.

But..seriously. I would just say that I'm exhausted and need a day to rest. Nothing wrong with simply being honest. I wouldn't be offended if a family member was simply honest. It is when they come up with constant excuses at every turn, but then go somewhere else that really irks me.

"No, no..... You take the kids and go to your sister's (mother's, aunt's, or whoever is hosting this year). I don't want to give everyone my cold. (cough here for emphasis) You go ahead, no need for me to ruin everyone else's fun. I be fine, take the whole day and have a good time. I'll just take some nyquil and sleep it off. (cough again, it helps if you look flushed and have red nose)."

Persimmon-

Book yourself a few fantasy thanksgivings between now and T-day proper. You might just recharge enough that you can face the family, actual bird and all the trappings.

Best,
F. B.

BTW- a diner near my workplace used to serve an awesome T-giving wrap sandwich every thursday. carved turkey breast, stuffing, braised brussel sprouts and garlic cranberry sauce in a wrap which was pressed and served with jalapeno sweet potato fries. It's since closed. :(

Well, it'd be sad to miss time with your family. I cannot go to dinner even if I wanted to because my family is dead. Forever. We used to do Thanksgiving and those are now just good memories.

So, we'll gather some new folks and carry on with my own kids. I am not into the food (eating a lot strikes me as gross). But we'll make some memories.

What excuse?
If you don't want to go then say 'Thanks for inviting me but I will be busy elsewhere and can not attend." - end of story.
You don't have to explain what you will be busy with or justify yourself.
The lengths people go to to endure annual ritual familial torture (ahem, excuse me) I mean parties is just ridiculous.
You didn't pick who you were born to, or who you have for siblings/aunts/uncles/grandparents or who your siblings married etc and so forth (you only pick your spouse or adopted children) and if you genuinely don't like these people - then don't go.
Do what you want and/or be with friends whose company that you enjoy.

Say you have head lice.

Food poisoning from a pre-turkey day meal with friends. Nobody cooks as good as you, mom/grandma - but I have to miss it this year and spend the day in the bathroom.

See you at easter!

Christy you thief! Explosive diarrhea works every time.

Just go....be polite and endure it for one day. My sister always comes up with some excuse and it's very obvious that she just doesn't want to come. It's already created a lot of ill will in the family....not worth it!

ooohhh....interesting...I'm the exact opposite...I wish to be able to celebrate the Holiday's with my family!!! I truly enjoy having people come to my home and my fixing dinner for them!! If you want to drive 20 miles to my house? You can wear your flannel PJs and sit in front of the 52" TV with my boys!! They would LOVE IT!!

Soooo....tell them the truth. Tell them that you love them - but you NEED the down time...You'll be over Friday or Saturday - but overall - you NEED downtime...if you lie and tell them you're sick you will have to keep track of that lie...and then it will come out in the end. Just tell the truth. You need DOWN TIME...

Hope this helps!

If there is no ill will, it's just your needing time, then go late (diarrhea excuse) and leave early. You don't know how bad it hurts to have ill will in the family.

You can say you are not feeling well, and just put your feet up. If your DH wants to take the kids, then let him. Sometimes "not feeling well" can be a physical ill or a mental one. We all need down time.

When I got married, I started hosting Thanksgiving. It works out well. I see my ILs and then I see my other family on Christmas.

The GI excuse works better if it is potentially infectious rather than food poisoning.

Oh, nasty case of food poisoning, so sorry! Enjoy without me!

It is easier to blame the illness on our little disease vectors than to pretend we're the ones who are sick. Plus, no one wants a snotty-nosed child around a buffet anyways.

This Thanksgiving, though, we're starting early with a 9 am touch football game with families from my 1st grader's football team, and then don't have to be at the family dinner until nearly 5. Kinda nice!

I wish I knew......3 kids, a marriage and a move 3.5 hours away and I STILL have to go spend the holidays at everyone else's house. I wish I knew when the day came that I could spend a holiday in my own house!! Even before we moved and I'd invite everyone to my house, I still couldn't stay home!
maybe I'll try the diarrhea one...... LOL

In my case, it's not an excuse, it's the truth.....

Sorry, gotta work!

1) I'm sick with a BAD case of diarrhea
2) I'm going out of town, got a great deal on a plane ticket.
3) I'm having surgery on my foot (other minor body part) and I'll be on pain killers.
4) I had unexpected company show up - darn it!
5) Pet is recovering from surgery can't be left alone.
6) Pet is delivering a litter any day now
7) My neighbor is nine months pregnant and alone, and I'm her ride to the hospital because her husband is away in the military.

Just a few random and crazy excuses