Imaginary Friends...is This Normal?

I was just wondering if there are other areas where she seems to "excel"? Why I ask is that she seems to have a very active imagination AND she can remember detail to the extreme. Having and seeing imaginary friends can be one of the signs of being gifted. I have two gifted kids and the word is out on another one - she's still too young to really tell but has many signs. One of them has had imaginary friends. They all pay close attention to details and can report things back from infancy - which according to doctors is impossible. My kids are adopted and they have been able to relate things back to us that happened. These incidents were never discussed in their presence so it isn't they overheard it from us and were repeating. I personally wouldn't worry about it. I would help her find lots of ways to employ her imgaination and see where it takes her.

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Your daughter sounds awesome!

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I grew up as an only child and didn't have a lot of playmates. I think I had at least a dozen imaginary friends, cousins, brothers, sisters, etc. They sat at the table with us and had to be buckled into seatbelts in the car. I think it is something that a very creative child does when they are maybe a little lonely, or don't have a lot of playmates. I can assure you that I outgrew my friends and turned out totally normal! Your daughter has a very creative mind, maybe you should encourage other creative pursuits like art or music. Enjoy her, kids like that are really fun, but they grow up way too fast!

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Totally normal -- or I have really werid kids. My oldest swore that Michael Jordan was his brother and taht the Power Rangers lived under his bed. We had to buckle them into the van every time we went somewhere. The hardest part was waiting while my son decided who would have to stay home since we didn't have enough seat belts for everyone to come.

(I remember one long discussion about needing to take the real boy Will with us and letting a Power Ranger stay home instead)

My second son had Slupee, Slurper, Mega Slurper and Mega Ultimate Slurper living under HIS bed. He knew their ages, likes and dislikes -- even their shoe sizes! Their favorite game, if I remember correctly, was building dino land in the back yard.

I personally had Mingo and SawSaw; I still blame them for mysterious happenings. Mingo was older than SawSaw, both were girls. Mingo only wore dresses while SawSaw was an amazing tree climber. (No, I've never been institutionalized)

As far as all the detail in her stories and how exact they stay -- why wouldn't they? What else is she trying to remember? She's got ample room in her brain for all those details!

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Hi D.....dont worry about your daughter......sounds like she has above average intelligence....the real world is too boring for her so she is inventing a more complicated social structure to keep her mind occupied.
She might be fantastic at playing chess or the violin.
C.

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HI there. If I were in your shoes, I would look up/research all the names that she is giving to you and see if you can find any info. on what she is describing. I do know that some kids of a large imagination- but this is pretty detailed, and seems to tell you the same a long time later.
It's great that you are listening to her, as I think that is an important step. Most people will tell you that it's just imagination... And I didn't believe anything other than that until I have heard Lisa Williams.
Hope this helps.
A.

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Completely normal. My 4 year old also has imaginary friends, except for the fact that she takes on their personalities. She pretends she is a boy and actually begins acting like one. She is a normal, healthy little girl with an overactive imagination. I too play along with it and welcome the imagination, especially in this day and age of video games and t.v. I wouldn´t be too concerned about it as it is a stage of development. My daughter doesn´t bring around the friends as much as she used to but they pop up every once in awhile.

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I had four imaginary friends as a kid. They actually helped me land my dream job at a top animation studio. (The concept for my portfolio was the imaginary friends I had as a kid)

Some people believe that imaginary friends are a sign of creativity. And others think they are guardian angels. Either way it's good.

If you haven't already, maybe you could take a few videos of her describing her imaginary friends or write down some of the details about them. I'm sure when she is older she would love to know the extent of her creativity as a child.

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I've heard this is totally normal... just like all the other moms have said. I actually have a question.... When did she start with her imaginary friends? The reason I ask is that I have 34 mos. old twins. One wakes regularily in the middle of the night... sometimes for hours... and he's talking... as if to someone. He rarely cries for me.. and he has one stuffed animal in his crib. I hear him "interacting"... sometimes yelling to someone "no... stop." and then really the most bizarre is when he laughes hysterically... as if he's just heard a joke... it's the kind of laughter I witness when he's playing with his brother... or wrestling with his daddy.

Also... this is no where near a parenting book or any such book of authority... but a very sweet story of imaginary friends called "If you could see me now"... by Cecelia Ahern. Just for fun!

Your daughter sounds like she'll be writing wonderful stories... I hope they are encouraged!

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Do not worry! I had a whole family of imaginary friends for many years as a child. I even had a gingerale factory. I had elaborate (and sometimes disturbing) storylines, and very much related to my imaginary friends like they were real. Your daughter is probably very bright. Make sure she has REAL friends and playmates, and make sure she gets enough intellectual/creative stimulation. Otherwise be happy she is so creative and independent in her thinking!

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Laura C is correct, having imaginary friends is often a marker for gifted children. I had an imaginary friend when I was young and so did my sister. It is a common enough thing that the folks in hollywood have even made a cartoon all about imaginary friends called Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends which airs on the cartoon network cable channel.

It is always important to have some idea what she is doing with her imaginary friends just like you would want to know what see was doing with actual human friends. I also think that the most important thing to remember about a child who shows signs of being gifted is that they are just as much in need of understanding and guidance as children who are on the lower end of the intelligence scale. A gifted child child is as far away, sometimes even further away, from the norm as the child who is labeled mentally retarded and will therefore receive all sorts of services.

Just remember that if a child is gifted it means that they process information in a different way than most people do. We are a society that wants everyone to be the the same; fit in the same mold. Well, life isn't like that. Your child might realize that she is different from others and as long as she is not made to feel bad about this there is no problem. You just want to keep an eye on things and help her if others start to treat her differently and make her feel that there is something wrong with her. There is nothing wrong with her, she just handles information and the world a little differently. Your being there to help shelter her from the cruel things that people can do to others when they feel like a person is different from them is the most important thing. She always need to know that if someone is behaving in a nasty way towards her because she is different from them that it is their problem and it really has nothing to do with her. I think as a parent it is your job to try to be her shield from anything like this until she in old enough, mature enough, and sophisticated enough to be her own shield.

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Never underestimate the supernatural and go with your gut, and be objective in your approach. Most will say this feedback is over-the-top, but the amount of details your child can provide along with your own concern, may indicate something else is going on. While your child may have an active and detailed imagination, some of the details you outline are too coincidental to involvement with the supernatural. Regardless on your faith (even being agnostic) and what you see on TV, approach your situation as a fully informed person. Begin by keeping a journal of her imaginary friends. Write down names, relationships, details, clothing, and facts. Your child may have a wonderful ability of seeing those who are to come, or those who have gone, or those in a parallel realm. In either case, gently ask her for as much detail as you can as part of normal conversation and jot it down. Along with such an ability comes responsibility, especially interacting with those who would do harm or even suggest harm. As you have rightly done, you've told your daughter that she has complete control over who interacts with her, which is oh, so true. The journal acts as your proof and, if nothing else, acts as a great way to reminiscence in later years.

No, she's not possessed or anything like that, but she may just have a keen awareness of the supernatural. Some are just born that way, but you need to approach with reasonable caution. Your approach thus far has been great. Continue to monitor and be informed by tracking her interactions in a journal. You may want to follow up and see if such folks really exist or existed. If you find that some or most used to live in your area, then you'll know for sure.

The only time you need to be concerned is when the imaginary friends begin interacting with your world, e.g. when she begins blaming them for doing things, or when items in your house are being moved, broken mysteriously. If this does occur, don't automatically blame your child. It may truly not be her fault. Again, objectively find out the facts. Let her tell her story. You'll get a sense of whether or not she is telling the truth or making up stories - e.g. when the description of the incident rolls off her tongue versus when she pauses or gives a pensive look as she is making it up as she goes.

Our daughter has an active and detailed imagination as well. It is based on her stuffed animals. Each has their own name, all have a complex family tree whereby one stuffed animal is related to another, and each one has their own specific diet. Again, there is consistency in her memory so you'll get the same response now as you did two years ago. What we did was to openly talk about each animal and incorporated as part of our normal conversation and family life. We even created a collage of her stuffed animals and a visual family tree. Perhaps you can do the same. Sometimes it's just your daughter wanting you to incorporate yourself into her world, so she feels connected and secure, versus getting frustrated at her or expressing your concerns about her 'friends' to her. Accept them, find out what you can about them, 'interact' with them (be proactive in this, ask to talk to so-and-so, and attempt a rue conversation, ask questions as you would an ordinary person - where do you live? What do you do? Are you student? if so, where? Do you like playing with my daughter? What do you like to do? What do you hope to do?), and engage in your daughter's world by incorporating them into your family conversations. Encourage dad to do the same. It is especially important that dad be actively and pro-actively involved in this. Much of your daughter's responsiveness to this will be based on what dad thinks and does. Talk it over at the dinner table. Embrace it, be informed, track it, and then make your assessment.

Best of luck and let us know your progress!

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Imaginary friend

Whats wrong with not seen her friend. Could be comltly normial
Does she have any real friends. or it could be sykcalogical
Trust whats in your heart. thats Were God live. never give up.
theres all kinds of stuff toy help you with.

don't forget theres alot of good therpis out there that are ok to go to them.
Your dauhter has some friend Have a tea party with her and her friend. Do you still have an emagintion still. emaginary friend usely a sign of lonlyness or just being there for he the whole family, play game with her remmber it all about her right now.

I hope you find what your looking for.
Sencerrly your V.

Don't hesite to contak me any time you needing just some one to talk to ok

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My daughter also has several imaginary friends (shes about the same age as your daughter) who also have very full lives she remembers in detail also. Sometimes we will be driving along and she will say, "There are a lot of people in this car!". That's when I know ALL of her friends are with us, sometimes just one or two come along. My brother and I had several imaginary friends growing up, some in common. I can remember a time when we really knew they weren't real but wished so much that they were. Seems a part of natural development for some children. My husband says he never did have an imaginary friend and jokes that as one of 9 siblings it was crowded enough as it was ;-). Kudos to you for honoring her friends AND laying out boundaries for the one that didn't follow house rules. Just think, she's had to stand up to someone, even if in our minds it's not "real", it was invaluable practice for her. My opinion - you have a very creative child and you are handling things wonderfully!

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I'd say yes, that your daughter has a normal imagination & a very good one! Does your daughter have other real friends she plays with? Maybe you could enroll her in an art, dance or drama class so she could really use her imagination. Unless these friends take place over playing w/real friends or get in the way of doing other things, then there's probably not much to worry about. If you see a dramatic change in these 'friends' behaviors, or your daughter's then you may want to take her back to the ped.

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It sounds like your daughter has a wonderfully well developed imagination. Maybe she'll grow up to be the next J.K. Rowling.

To help put your mind at ease I had about a dozen imaginary friends as a kid (all talking bunnies.) I use to drive my mom crazy going on and on about the bunnies and their relationships (there was a wedding, I took pictures with mom's Polaroid, she was not happy.)

Any way perfectly normal, but I would hid my camera if I were you. ;-)

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