I'm Confused!!! - Fort Wayne,IN

J.,
i, of course, am not a doctor, so i have no idea what the problem is. i became pregnant (without trying, and surprisingly) in april of 04. the thing is, i have had some other physical medical issues. i went to my doctor in 05 and was tested for thyroid, lupis, insulin, etc. and nothing was wrong. i did have these symptoms before i was pregnant too. finally about two weeks ago, after more testing, i found out i have PCOS or polycysitc ovarian syndrom. one of my symptoms was irreguluar periods. i don't believe since i started my period that they were ever normal/on time. from what i have read, i understand that many women have this and they all have hugely different symptoms. most women with this are obese, but i am not. i understand that i was extremely lucky to have conceived with this "disease" or whatever they call it. you might look this up on line (not condoning self/on line diagnosis) do a search/google for pcos and see if you have any other symptoms that you may not realize, then talk to your doctor. you might want to have your insulin level checked too. if nothing else, ask about fertility drugs, i suppose. make sure your hormones are all in check and all that jazz. good luck to you and may you be blessed.
C.

I work around an OB office and I think you should ask your doctor for a blod pregnancy test If you are showing signs of being pregnant. OTC test are not as reliable.

all these moms have given you great advice. i just want you to know that home pregnancy tests are not always right. i took home tests on both my pregnancies and both came out negative. so i went with my instincts and got prenatal vitamins till i could get to the doctor and i'm glad that i did because i got a false negative. please do not rely completely on the home test but more on your instincts of what your body knows. may God bless you with a child soon.:)

Dear J.

when your ready god will give in to you. I am a firm believer in this. It took my husband and I 7 long years to have a baby. I was in the exact boat your floating in. It seems like a horrible nightmare. Buy the test and just do it for your own sanity. If it is negative then oh well your not ready just yet. you have something more to do in life before it happens. You could always try to hold those hips up high after well you know :) I think this is what worked for us :)
God Bless

J.-
I did not have the same issues you did, however, I was told I couldn't have any children. I gave up and became very depressed. I went back to my infertility doctor about 2 years later for one last chance, and he gave me shots to take, and I ended up pregnant with twins.
Sometimes, by dwelling on the issue, make the infertility worse. Give yourself a break and when you least expect it, it will happen. Try adopting a dog or cat, or a hobby that helps relax you.
I wish you all the luck in the world, because I know how upsetting this can be.

J. ~

I think you should take pregnancy test. When you have your periods are they painful ? do you bleed a lot ? what are they like, you said it was very uncommen for you to have a reg period. You should tlk to your doctor about Endometriouses ( ms )just go talk to him/her about it, because this can and will make it hard for you to get pregnant. I had it and just found out that I had it and I had 4 miscarriages prior to finding out, 10 yrs later it took one doctor to finally do the surgery to see if I had it. But on an encouraging note I had 2 beautiful babies! Just 3 months ago I had to have a full Hystorectomy because it got so bad and I had other problems as well.. So please talk to you doctor about this ok..

Untel then if your not then you can "practice" more :) Good luck to you sweetheart... May God bless you and your husband, remember when its time for you to have a baby God will make sure you have one.. Hes probably waiting for your body to become more healthy so with that said good luck and be patient :) Good things always happen when those are patient:) I know this first hand :)

S. K

Hi J....

I'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing for me, but i've been able to get pregnant WAY too easily all of my life! My first pregnancy, I was 16. I am now 47 and I've been pregnant 8 times...I delivered 8 children (altho my 2 lil twin angel girls were stillborn in 2002) and I had a miscarriage with my twins sons almost 2 yrs ago. My oldest is now 31 and my youngest will be 10 next month! I LOVE being a mom! It is truly my favorite role in life!

So I don't have any personal experience with having difficulties getting pregnant...but... I have a good friend who I've known for 10+ yrs. She and her hubby have been together for 18 yrs. She has a son from a previous relationship who is almost 21. She and her hubby have desperately wanted a child together. They both went thru testing and did all they could to get pregnant for all these years. She used to go to sleep crying because she wanted a baby with him so badly. About 6 months ago, they decided that they would stop tryin, saying that if it is meant to be, it will be. Well, you know what? SHE'S PREGNANT! She is now 11 weeks pregnant and couldn't be any happier!
I am a true believer in things happening how and when they are supposed to...that is rarely when and how I want things to happen tho... I also believe that even before I was born, God knew every single thing that would happen in my lifetime and when. So HE knew that I would have all of these kids to drive me nuts...lol...and HE knew that I would (somehow)be able to handle it. HE also knew that Shelly (my friend who is newly pregnant) would get pregnant exactly when she did.
I learned a valuable life lessons very early in my life...patience is truly a virtue and pays off every time!Trust God...He knows what He's doing!

A.

Sometimes worrying about it so much can cause you not to start your period. You could wait another week or so and then decide to take a test. If you skipped one in Nov. you could be repeating the same thing. Skip in Nov., have one in Dec., skip Jan. and have one in Feb. The reason I say this? I charted my temps for months and months before even trying to get pregnant--just so I could understand my cycle and when I ovulated each month. Well, my cycles went from 37 days to 31 days--back to 37 and then 31 again. So your body may just be deciding what it wants to do. If you are trying to get pregnant and have been for awhile, I recommend you read the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weichler and follow her methods. It is a tried and true method and I know many successful stories from the use of it--my daughter is one of the successes. The first time trying we were pregnant within 3 months (miscarried), the second time we were pregnant the first month trying (miscarried) and the third time pregnant within 3 months. Good luck and hopefully you won't have any need for the book! :) Just relax. Try not to think so much about it! Most of the time pregnancy happens when you stop thinking about it!

I had this problem, ALWAYS irregular cycles. I am 30 years old and was finally diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrom) I have always carried weight in my mid section, had dark hair on my belly and facial area, and rarely had my period. Now, I am on the ring, I am on metformin for my sugar intollerance which comes along with PCOS. I have cut out most carbs in my diet - I am losing weight, have my cycle - and when I am ready to get pregnant I will need to start progesterone and stay on progesterone. Since we are 60% more likely to miscarry as well :( I would get checked out after doing some investigating online... if you have the symptoms. The sooner you get treatment, the easier it will be to get pregnant. Could also be endometriosis. PCOS is HARD to diagnose.... I am REALLY far from a text book case, but the symptons and hormone tests they did via lab work - helped my OB/GYN and Family Dr come to this diagnosis.

Good Luck...

well maybe you guys should kinda try to not think about it i know that will be hard but dont think about. the stress from worring and trying can cause weird periods and if it isn't the #1 thing you guys want to do then maybe everything will come together for you.you need to try to relieve some stress from your body.i hope you understand what im saying and it helps.
best of luck to you guys

hey J.! sorry about all the trouble you and your husband are having. when my oldest child started kindergarten i got baby fever and felt that i needed to have another one. we tried for several months and i was beginning to think it wasnt in my cards to have another child. just as we decided to stop trying i found out that i was six weeks pregnant. we were thrilled. so maybe it is the old tale if you want something you cant get it but as soon as you dont think of it, it will come. i hope this gives you some encouragement. i undersatnd all the feelings and emotions you are having. dont give up and in the end it will all be worth your wait when you have that beautiful precious baby to hold in your arms!!!!

I have a cousin that had the same problem. Once she quit taking meds she got pregnant pretty easy. The only real advice I have is to try to quit thinking about it so much. I know it's easier said than done. Maybe give it another week or so and see if you get your period. If not, I'd take another test. It may be easier on you if you know, even if it's negative. Good luck to you....I hope everything works out for you :)

There is an amazing book call "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom" by Chritiane Northup, M.D. It may help you understand what your body is going through. It may also be helpful to look into family planning. It teaches women how to determine what part of there cycle they are in by their discharge not by just getting your period. This was extremely helpful for us in concieving our second son.

You should go to your local Health Store that sells all natural products and ask them about their prenatal vitamins. kinda pricy, but if you take them now before getting pregnant, they will increase your chance of pregnancy.

I say "take the test" I had uterine cancer in 1995 and was told I may not be able to have children. Now, surprisingly I have a 3 month old, which I did not know of until I was 22 weeks pregnant..... mostly because I had regular periods the first 4 months of my pregnancy, so you just never know!

getting pregnant isn't as easy for some as it is for others. my hubby and i went through what you are going though....irregular periods, no periods with neg tests. just keep trying and praying and testing. i found out at the doc's by accident when i went in to talk about our fertility problems...it was a very happy surprise. but my 1st symptoms were very tender brests...that was the ob's clue to have me take a test, then came the tiredness...i was always exhausted and didn't want to do anything but sleep(which is very unusal for me) and then came the morning sickness. good luck.

A little encouragement. Try not to stress yourself, I'm convinced that that makes getting pregnant harder. Just try to keep telling yourself to enjoy the romantic time you have with your husband. If you do test again and it's negetive just remember that you can keep trying and in my opinion trying is fun. enjoy it and enjoy him, when things do work out you will have very little time for each other after the baby comes. Good luck and remember enjoy the time you have.

Hi J., I went through the same thing. I went through it after having kids. We decided to have another child but it wasn't working. I couldn't figure it out I never had no problem getting preg. Then I seen doctor and they said there no reason why I can't. Finally a doctor told me to stop trying to get preg and focus on my relationship with my husband. Make love without being focus on trying to have a baby. Your body so stress and nothing happening. Once I gave up and starting enjoying making love instead of working to have a baby 2 months later I was preg. Enjoy it and relax instead of making it a job and it will help with your stress. Just give this a thought and try to see if it may work. Focus on your love and make sex enjoyable - play around. Make a date with each other. Focus on one another. Once I gave of the idea and said no more doctor I was going to wait a year boom I was preg. Stress of a issue can do alot to our body.