Help for My Boss...

When my twins were potty training I had no trouble with my daughter, but my son was 4 before he was completely potty trained. I too had tried everything. My peditrician advised me to just be patient and relax. They will start going on the potty when they are ready. As soon as I quit trying to force the issue, he started going on his own.

Hi Ellen! First of all her fears are causing her frustration. Fears her child may have the same problem her husband has. Another thing is TIME it takes time and patience and plenty of PRAISE... If she doesn't take the time to monitor and direct her she will not go. She has to find out what makes her little one feel like a big girl and reverse that toward potty training making her FEEL like she is the big girl she says she is. Not hard to do just patience and attention is greatly needed.She could also put on the potty training panties with the disappearing pics and tell her not to wet her pics are they will all go away and she wont see them again. When all else fails time her from her last poop til the next poop and continue taking her to the potty at the same time portions leaving her sit there til she does it. As for as your girly make it as fun and presurress but very important as possible. Whatever you both do a child loves to be PRAISED when they do something BIG or coached praise when they need to do something BIG! Wishing you the best... GOD BLESS!
In His Presence
H.

Ellen,
My doctor told me that the reason she won't go is because she has held it and it hurts a little when she goes so therefore she won't go at all and that makes it worse. My dr told me to give her a capful of Miralax in her juice or milk and it won't hurt to use it everyday if I needed to. It is not a laxative but a softener. Tell her try that and see if that helps. Once she learns that it doesn't hurt, she may want to try and go on the potty more. It is worth a try.
Hope this helps.

Hi! I have 3 children who are all grown. I never did get the potty-training thing. Somehow our oldest was trained with the help of his grandmother. My best advice is not to worry about it and just enjoy your children for who they are. I can guarantee that they will be trained by the time they go to pre-school or school. I'm sure that isn't what you wanted to hear, but that's it. Let them wear diapers or pull-ups. What's the big deal. If the child's father is constipated a lot, he needs more fiber and exercise. Maybe the child does too. If she doesn't want to poop in the potty, why does she have to? Relax and enjoy what you have.
R. L.

Hello. I understand your frustration. For my son I used juice boxes. He loves to drink juice out of a box. I told him if he would pee on the poty he could have one. He would only get juice from the box and I had water in his sippy cups. After a week of doing this he would then go on his own. It took some time to get him to poop. We are finally going poop on his own now. Its taken about two months to get where we are now. I still have to remind him and we don't have to use the juice boxes anymore. I hope that this helps you. good luck!!

My nephew didn't like the way the water splashed up on his bottom when he pooped on the potty so he wouldn't do it. My sister put toilet paper on the water and he would poop just fine. Hope that helps....

Ellen,

All I can say is patience, patience, patience. Girls for some reason are harder to potty train than boys. My daughter is now 4, but she took forever to potty train. She finally got the pee-pee but it took about 6 months later before she got the poop. We tried everything from gifts to treats and everything in-between. I also talk to my doctor and he said when she was ready she would go. You have to be real careful that she doesn't get constipation because that'll make it worst for her. When she finally goes poop in the potty than celebrate. Once she goes in the potty, than she will continue to go. I never thought my daughter would ever get out of diapers. Also, you may recommend using daipers instead of pull-up, she'll think she is a baby and may not want that. Besides, pull-ups are more expenisive. Just my 2 cents.

My son is 4 and we had an awful time potty traning him. We tried rewards and punishment. He would urinate but would not have a bowel movement. I was about to pull my hair out and he was about to start preschool. I was talking with some co-workers and a Nurse Practitioner I worked with said that there was a term for that. Encopresis, It's a combo of that being the only thing they have control over, and diet not being that balanced. She told me it is more prevelant in boys, but some girls have the same problem. She told me to get a laxative/softener called Miralax. I t is over the counter. Give them 2 doses a day until things start to move, and continue with the 2 doses until you see that things are getting a little too loose, almost diarrhea like. Then back off to once a day. it is in powder form and mixes in most drinks. My son prefers it in milk, he doesn't notice a taste to it. It made juice taste funny to him. but your daughter may be different. We did exactly what she said and within a week or so he was going to the potty. He still had an accident or two in the beginning, but after that he was fine. You will need to continue this for at least 6 mos. and maybe up to a year. We have been doing this since July and it is still working. The Nurse said if you quit too soon they will go back to the old behavior. I could not be happier with the results. I hope this works for you. If you would like you could email me at ____@____.com

Tell her to ask her pediatrician about it. My best friend's little girl had the same problem. She was terrified to go poopie, because of the noise it made when it splashed, and she held it so long that she got anal fissures when she finally went. I think they ended up prescribing her some laxatives so she didn't have a choice but to go, until she learned that it wasn't scary.

I am so glad that you asked this question because my son who turned three at the end of July is doing the exact same thing. I tried to refuse giving him a pull up but he would instead poop a little at a time 2 or three times a day because of it (I think he was trying not to go but couldn't help it). This was even more frustrating than cleaning up the pull up so we went back to them. Most people that I have talked to have said that this is common with boys. I have decided not to stress about it anymore and to just continue encouraging going poopy on the big boy potty. Like a friend of mine said, "Have you ever met an adult that still poops in there pants?" Of course the answer is no.....so I will give it more time. While it's hard, I think we somehow must accept that kids do things in their own time. I completely understand where your boss is coming from because it has been a frustrating topic in our house as well.

My son would not poop in the pot til he was 4. He wore underwear at home and asked for a pull-up to poop...which after trying to coax him to poop I usually gave him cause I didn't want him to be constipated. My sitter made him wear a pull-up all day cause she was afraid he would poop on her furniture....which he would not have..he never did at home. 2 weeks after being put in preschool he started pooping on the pot there..then at home. I would not pressure her..causes more stress...and probably not any results. My son for whatever reason was kinda scared to set on the pot..it made noises..etc. Tell her to make sure her daughter is eating some fruit and drinking some water to make sure her poop isn't too hard. I remember putting a "little" mineral oil in my sons juice also. My son didn't start peeing in the pot all the time til he was 3. Be patient with your daughter also...maybe offer stickers are some other type of reward she loves for putting some pee in the pot. They all eventually get it :)

OK. The most important thing is to be consistent and follow through. If she isn't doing that then it is her fault that the kid wont use the potty. When I decided to potty train my two kids it was a lot of work for less than a month...then it was over. My daughter was completely trained before she was 18 months.
The thing that worked best for her was this. She got to pick out the panties that she wore...at the store and every morning and after her bath. If she went to the potty we sang and danced and made a really big deal out of it. If she pooped in her panties SHE had to throw them away.(of course since im not rich I would get them out and wash them but she never knew a thing)
It took less than 2 weeks.

My son was a lot harder. I had to bribe him. We did 1 cookie everytime he peed and 3 cookies everytime he pooped. Even though I had to pay up I still made a big deal out of it. We sang and danced. Praise is the answer to stubborn children.

I hope this helps....she MUST be CONSISTENT!!!!!!!!

Oh yeah, My daughter hates the bathroom(don't know why) so I put her potty chair in a central room in the house. They say that if you put it where they have to see it then it makes it easier...

The advise that I was given by our doctor was to let my so take there time. The doctor stated that in all due time my son would go potty on his own and please do not force him. My son had a fear of using the toilet so when he was ready he got himself a pull up and I put in on. It was about 2-3 weeks later that my son decided to use the toilet on his own and came to me and said mommy look what I did. I had no issues with him from that day on. We must have patience and all children do not potty train the same. My son was 3 yrs old at the time.

I had the same problem, but mine stemed from a different source. Mine just didn't want to poop at all. She was constipated most of her 1st 2 years of life. Finally the doctors put her on a medicine that helped her. Glycolax. When it was time to potty train, I had help. My mother in law was in town and stayed with us for a month before she went back to England. She pretty much potty trained Linzi for us all except for the poopy part. Linzi didn't want to poopy because she related it to pain, because of being constipated for so long. I finally bought some moist flushable wipes and told her that when she poopied in the potty like a big girl we would use the big girl wipes, but if she didn't go in the potty we used regular toilet paper to wipe her. After about 2 or 3 weeks she got tired of just plain old toilet paper and started pooping in the potty like a big girl. And she will tell you how big she is too. Since then it's been great. Maybe your boss ought to try this out. Worked for us.

Is your daughter talking about BIG GIRL things? Make her think it's a big girl thing and that to be a big girl you have to use the big girl potty. Does she have her own or use (or not use) the big potty? Mine prefered the big potty to poopy in. Try that and mix in the moist flushable wipes for poopy time with her as well. It may help. Good luck hun.

I feel your pain! My 26-month old does the same thing. She calls "tee-tee" and runs to the bathroom, but that only means she ALREADY went in her pull-ups! and then she sits on the potty, being all cute and playful. She also calls "tee-tee, potty" when she wants to get out of the bed, (clever one:D)
I was told it will happen when she's ready, but the fact is I'm ready and tired of buying diapers.

I'll be watching the answers to your post - hopefully we'll get it figured out SOON!

Good luck,
J. M

I have not had this problem myself but know people with small children that have. Both were boys though but I think it is a common thing with boys or girls. It just took them both time and they eventually grew out of it.