Hands in the Pants

Updated on July 02, 2008
K.S. asks from Mason, OH
11 answers

My 22 m.o DD walks around all the time with her hands in her pants. She is contstantly 'playing with herself'. I know toddlers might do this sometimes when being changed but she is constantly walking around digging in her pants. I guess I might even expect this more from a little boy. I asked if other kids in her class at daycare do this and they said not really except sometimes when they are getting changed. So I dont know if I should be concerned about this or what. Is this normal? Have others had this experience? What should I do about it? What is the right way for me to respond to this with any disciplinary measures? I always try to just remove her hand without making too big a deal of it but dont know if this is the correct thing to do.

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L.G.

answers from Lima on

See if she is itching first. You can get a yeast cream from her doctor and try that.
My 23 month old, I found was getting severe yeast infections and as soon as I stopped giving her juice, they stopped!!!!!!!!!! She now has milk for breakfast and meals. NO juice!!! Occasionally there will be something that gives her a bad rash and she is in pain, but not very often.

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K.P.

answers from Fort Wayne on

HI I don't remember any of our three kids doing this but maybe if you just ignore her she will see that it doesn't bother you and forget doing it. Maybe she knows this is one way to get your attention. Check with your peditration if it doesn't stop. Good luck

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E.S.

answers from Cleveland on

Ha - I think I've read about this every year for last last 5 - my daughter is 6. Yes it's normal, some do it more than others, some do it more when they're feeling a need for "comfort", some are just more sensitive, more into sensation, etc. All the advice - don't make a big deal about it, don't make it shameful or dirty, talk about how private parts are private, etc. For my own peace of mind, I just took to equating it with "picking" or "fussing". My usual conversation is, "No one likes to see you pick - no one wants to see people pick their nose, pick their butt, sticking their fingers in their ears or their hands in their pants... these are all things people don't want to watch other people do. If it's your nose, get a tissue, if it's your butt or pee-pee, go to the bathroom or your bedroom if we're home, if it's your ear, at least be quick about it and don't sit and examine anything sticking to your finger." I figured if I just lumped it all together then I could address it without embarrassing her or myself and since it's all true - yay! Since your little girl is still so young, obviously, you're limited on what you can say, but at least you can consider whether this approach works for you or not since I didn't come across it in all my research. Everything I read was situation-specific.

Good luck!

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A.P.

answers from Dayton on

Hi K.-

I've been told by our doctor that it is actually more common in girls than boys to touch themselve. Our 5 yr old does it in her sleep! (scares Dad to death about the future:)
I wouldn't worry about it and I wouldn't make much of an issue- that could make it get worse. All kids do it- even if their Moms won't admit it.

Have a good one-
A.

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C.B.

answers from Columbus on

Hi K.,

My 18 month old son does the same thing! I got tired of constantly policing it - and he's not at an age where we can logically address it. I decided to just buy a bunch of tops that are onesie style so he's wearing a one piece shirt and can't get his hands down his diaper. It's worked great for us! I can even put him back in a regular shirt now and he doesn't put his hands down his pants much anymore. Hope this helps and good luck - I know how frustrating it is!

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S.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

Say, "Get your hands out of your pants!" and/or remove them like you do and say "NO".
Explain to her that people don't do this in front of others.
If you don't address this now, you will have very many embarassing moments to come.

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M.N.

answers from Columbus on

K.,

Before you decide if discipline measures are needed you might want to take her to the doctor and see if she has an infection.

Sometimes it may be because she is ichy and not just for pleasure.

good luck and God bless,
Mel

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T.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

My daughter does the same thing. My mother was very concerned so I took her to the doctor and found out she had a yeast infection. The doctor told me to use Lotrimin, which is for athletes feet, but it worked. It was gone in 2 days. She still touches herself when I change her but that is normal. Your daughther may be itching from a yeast infection. Maybe you she take her to the doctor to see what she says.

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H.C.

answers from Steubenville on

My daughter did this often when she was 3 1/2. When she was at PreK and her teacher saw her doing it, she would just gently remind her that she shouldn't do that and would get germs on her hands. I'd do the same thing at home. Also, I strated dressing her in one piece outfits so that she couldn't get her hands down there as easily. It's a normal phase, even for girls (which I wasn't expecting either. I had 3 boys before DD) that kids go through. Just because not ALL kids do it, doesn't mean it's still not normal, ALOT of kids do.
Luckily it was a short lived phase for my DD. I don't know if she did it out of curiousity or boredom.
Just try to remind her daughter that she'll get pee germs on her hands and she doesn't want that.
Good luck.

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B.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

Its probably just a habit at this point. My son has always been into comfort habits....sucking on his shirt was a big one for awhile, and he didnt even realize he was doing it. In your case, what about finding some one piece outfits- overalls- or even onsies instead of t shirts and seeing if not being easily accessible deters her?

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R.N.

answers from Columbus on

Hi Kerri, yes it is normal however, just be strict with her and say "its okay to touch yourself but only in the bathroom or in your bed." and keep reminding her of that nicely. If she is touching while watching tv- "honey,please go to your room whle you are touching your privates Blues Clues will still be on when you get back" Things like that.... they stop doing it inpublic then!

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