Getting Child off of Binkie

I had one binkie girl and one thumb girl. The binkie was MUCH easier! :o) At one year, we told my oldest that her binkie needed to live her bed. She could have it whenever she wanted, but would need to go to her bed to have it. Other than that we didn't worry about it. Honestly, no one ever went off to college with a binkie! If she was upset she would go upstairs to her bed for a few minutes then come back happy. Once in a while she'd fall asleep, which just told me she needed an early nap that day. :o)
By the time she was about 2.5 yrs. if we were going out all day so she wouldn't be napping at home, I would 'forget' to bring it. No problem. She napped just fine without it. Once she realized that she really didn't need it to sleep she gave it up on her own. Now the thumb was another story altogether!

My daughter loved her pacifier and was constantly with the thing in her mouth. We also had to give a pacifier time limit and it was to be used only at nap/sleep time. When she needed a little pacifier time she would go right to her room. Pretty soon she lost interest in having to go to her room for her pacifier time and used it less and less.

My son on the other hand sucked his thumb. Unfortunately, I would have preferred the pacifier. He sucked on his thumb and there was no way to have his pacifier at just nap/sleep time. He is in need of orthodontics work!

Good luck with the pacifier woes, this too shall pass!

Don't set your child on a time limit of what the 'experts' say, but use it as a guideline instead. For my oldest, we reduced to nap/sleep time, then I just began finding them and throwing them away and pretty soon, no more binkies. Went through a little rough patch, but she got over it.

For my 2nd, she still had her binkie at 19 mos when #3 was born, that was a little tougher. I read "they'll give it up when they are ready", well at 3 1/2 she was no closer. So, for both of them, I just cut off the tips and left them around. They didn't like it, but when they asked for one, I'd say "there it is" then the "but it's broken", so I'd say "well, if it's broken, throw it away!" We got through it. Until my twins were born 4 months later and the then 2 year old picked up all the babies' binkies and took them. I wrestled with it for a while, then decided to just not let the babies' have them either, cut the tips off again and we went through it again with the same child!!

Now one of my twins is a thumbsucker and I am not looking forward to this one. I'm sure cutting the tip off just isn't an option!! :0)

Good luck! You'll figure it out, just be consistent, that's the key! Oh, I did the binkie thing then didn't mess with potty training for a couple of months so I only had to do one at a time, I didn't want to shock the poor child or wreck my nerves!

Take care

D.

Try cutting a little bit of the part that goes in the mouth off -- a sliver at at time. By the time it's down to the "nub" as we call it, the child loses interest.

I got that idea on Mamasource and it thankfully worked after trying every trick in the book!

Remember, you have to be consistent with whatever you decide to do. Our first step was binkys remain in the crib and are only used for nap or bed time. (The only exception we made was the 8 hour car trip to see family and that happened once). After a couple of weeks, we went cold turkey. It was a rough three - five days, but that was the best choice for us. Good luck.

My son kept his until he was 3. Before that, we made sure it was only used at night and for naps. When we felt he was ready, we talked a lot about the fact that he was getting so big that he didn't need it any more. Then, one day when we were reading a Curious George book (there is a story about George going into an ice cream shop and making a huge banana split) and I asked him if he would be willing to trade his paci for a banana split like George had (he had never before had anything like it, but he knew enough to know he would like it). He said yes so we went to our local creamery and had him buy the banana split with his paci--he actually had to hand it over to the server when the ice cream was brought to the table. Of course I talked with the server about it beforehand so he knew what we were doing. He asked for it a couple times after that, but no real fits or crying spells because I kept talking about how good the ice cream was and reminding him of why HE chose to get rid of it. I was scared to death about getting rid of it but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. Good luck.

Regarding the binky, my friend absolutly raved about the cut method, and the psychology behind it. She emailed me a link to a site that has a free publication (supported by advertisements). Very cool stuff, worked like a charm for me as well; wouldn't do it any other way. The link is www.bye-bye-binky.com for anyone who is interrested. If you do, let me know your thoughts… B.

Hi K.,

My youngest son absolutely LOVED his pacificer!!!! I know exactly how difficult this can be for you and your son.

First of all, I don't believe there should be "time limit" with a security need like this, so my opinion may not matter to you knowing that :O) But look at young kids who suck their thumb, or have a blankie.....they don't have to "give them up" at 2 yrs old. So, why should a pacifier kid?

I began when my son was 2-2 1/2, by giving him a gold box to put by his bed. He decorated it by drawing on it. I told him that was his Pacifier Treasure Box to hold all of his pacifiers in during the day when he was not using them. Pacifiers are only for sleeping and resting, I told him. So, everytime he wanted one, I said, "Of course you can have your pacifier now, that means you are sleepy, so you need to go lay on your bed until you are done resting". He would do it, and sometimes he would fall asleep, and other times he was only in there for about 15 mins. If he ever came out with his pacifier in his mouth, I just reminded him to go put it in his Treasure Box.

The first couple of times were the hardest because at 2yrs old they are still a baby at heart. We did that routine for about 10 months-12 months, until he was 3 and started Pre-school. Everyday after preschool he would go in his room by himself to have his pacifier for about an hour. That was a huge rest period each day for him.

About 2 months after he started Pre-school, he became "too busy to remember" his pacifier. My job was to keep them out of sight-out of mind. There were days he asked if he could go in his room, then there were days that he just wanted/needed it for bedtime. All of those reasons were completely OK with me.

One day, he realized it had been 5 days without his pacifier. And weined himself, in my opinion. I was NEVER the "bad guy".

About 6 months after that, he came across his Treasure Box and asked me what to do with them (his precious pacifiers). He wanted to give to my sister who had just had a new son :O) I called my sister and "prepped" her for the beautiful gifts he had wrapped himself for her. Thankfully, my sister "played along" with him because she knew he so generously gave up one of the most important things in his life. Then, there was closure forever!

This worked for me, and I feel very good (as a mom) that my son never thought I was "mean" about his pacifier.

I know there is talk about a pacifier ruining a childs teeth, but my feeling is that they are baby teeth, and a child is most likely to have had an issue with his teeth anyway. For the record, my son didn't have dental problems. He is just now loosing his front teeth in 1st grade :O)

I hope my experience helps guide you in the direction you want to go with this. I know how hard it can be to take something away from our children when they completely depend on them.

Good Luck!

~N. :o)

K.,

My son is 2 1/2 and still used the pacifier but only in the crib for nap abd bedtime. We started by having him take out his paci before he gets out of the crib in the morning. This helps him feel like he is in control which I am sure you have experienced is the best way with a toddler. :)

We also allow the paci if he is sick or if we are on a lone car trip or airplane trip.

I was concered about him still using the pacifier and we went to the pediatric dentist last week. I was sure she was going to say he had to give up the paci but instead she said there is no rush and she would rather he use the paci than have to give it up and start sucking his thumb or fingers for comfort.

I was so relieved and I think sometimes we read somthing and then think whoever wrote it is the final work on how we should be parenting. We feel pressured to make our kids gro up so quickly and be "strong" I think if your little one needs the paci don't feel pressured to force giving it up.

Good luck and you are obviously a very good mom if you are reading and caring just don't take all that reading too seriously,

N.

Cold turkey worked the best for us. The 1st 2 days are hardest, where they are asking for it constantly. Then it tapers off and its like they never had one. Good luck!

Supernanny made a Binkie Fairy with a basket. She told them that they were ready to be without it. Then she had the kids put their binkies in the basket for the Binkie Fairy to take away. One child did it right away but the other one needed time. He eventually did it with some prompting. Then she put the Binkie Fairy up high out of reach and disposed of the binkies when they weren't around. It seemed to work perfectly cuz the children felt in control of the situation. Good luck!

Greetings My Friend: This is a problem that can break an adult down with out even a bit of effort. We took eack of our" childrens plugs" away when hey aere shortly before 2. Sometimes we suffered for it. We finally agreed that it is easier to loose the pacifier than it was to loose the bottle.
My grandchildren were all taken off before they were 2 with the exception of miss C and Mr J. Their parents were not ready for life without it. Now the children would come to Nana & Papa's and hand it right over but the minuet that the folks arrived out it had to come, it never stopped amazing me. For Miss C who had started to chew it I just cut it shorter and sexplained it would now hurt her. For the great Mr J, his mom just couldn't give up the baby and just encouraged him to stay little be using it. I have one now who has the I have it I have forgoten it attitude. She has them stored all over the place. So the point being ARE YOU REALLY READY FOR THIS??? Have your little one help you to toss them away and to trade it for soemthign special like a new truck or storybook. And that way they are apart of the process or you just wait til they need cleaned and tell the child they all melted in the dishwasher. Or you are honest and just cut it up and put it in the trash with them knowing. This is always the harshest. Because it is one thing to know and it is another to just make the sacrifice. Poor dad could not take it and would stop and buy her more along the way home. But I can honestly say that the kids turned their pacifiers over to us once they got here. REPLACE IT with a carebear toy. nanag

I like the binkie fairy idea. If you are not into fairies, however, you can try what actually happened to a friend of mine.

Take a special trip to the zoo and make sure she loses the binkie there. Come up with a story like the mommy monkey must have taken it for her new baby. The toddler understands that the baby is, afterall, a baby and in greater need of the binkie. In the meantime, make sure all binkies at home are way out of reach of her, but also you. It's possible that you are as dependent on the binkie as she is. ;)

The binkie fairy of course! You tie the binkie in a tree outside and make a big ceremony out of it, because the binkie fairy needs the baby binkies to live! Then the binkie fairy is so grateful that she leaves a present as a thank you! What ever works for you, Good luck.

We decorated a binky box together and then put it up high in the closet then the binky was only allowed out at nap times and bed times, this is an easier transition if your child is really still attached. I would let the child put the binky in the box themselves and say "see you soon binky"!
If you think your child is ready for cold turkey you could send the binky in the mail to the binky fairy and then have the fairy send a present back to you. or let your child give the binky to a family/friend who has a newborn. good luck

We limited the binkie to the crib for a few months before we made the switch. Then, when my son moved to his "big boy bed" he never even asked for it again. I was amazed.

my son was off his binkie about 2 months after his 2nd birthday. I started with telling him we were going places where only big boys without binkies could go. And than moved it to, we could take it, but it stays in the car. Than it stays home, etc. etc. just slowly stop taking it places.
A good way to see if she's ready to stop with it, because a lot of children are different (don't believe everything they say in those books) is to stop automatically giving it to her when you normally would. if it drops, pick i tup and put it on the counter. WAit for her to ask for it. Put her to bed and wait for her to ask for it. sometimes it's routine and they don't even really think about it and go to sleep without it. Slowly tell her no when she asks for it the first time, than if she asks again say "really", and than maybe give it to her. But make it sort of "uncool" and she'll start to get the vibe.
But don't take it away if it's a security thing, it could throw her completely off. You want her to give it up herself.

good luck
K.

Hi, My friend explained that when you are 2, you're bigger and only babies use their binkies. She talked it up and the family were all supportive cheerleaders. On his birthday, her son and she went around collecting all the binkies to give to little babies that needed them.

At 18 months I had her gather them all up in a bag and I had her throw them in the trash can herself and tell them bye bye. We thought she would be fine after that, but she cried hysterically for about 10-15 minutes the 1st night (she only used them at bedtime anyway) and about 10 minutes the 2nd night and the 3rd night she didn't hardly fuss at all. It was hard doing it this way, but much easier than dragging it out. Since she is 2 years old she will understand what is happening, but she will definitely cry and fuss hoping you will give in.

Dear K.,
I really would take the magazine's advice with a grain of salt. What's wrong with wanting a binky? Your daughter is not even two and will decide for herself when she's ready...
On top of that, your own mom- instinct probably has something to say in the matter too..:)!

Good luck,
Y..

I need to do the same thing, soon, and I'm not looking forward to it. :)

We start by taking it qaway if he is really busy/happy/entertained. We only give it back if the little guy gets really grumpy. We also give it to him at bedtime. I think if you just try to avoid it unless they really are in need then they will want/need it less and less.