Final Decree, Going to Court Tomorrow

You definitely can ask for it to be retroactive. Usually what the court does is increase his monthly amount by a nominal amount to go towards the arrears. My ex has to pay an additional $50 a month towards the arrears. But, you do have to have that in the child support documentation so I think you would have to have amended papers, which will probably require postponing the hearing tomorrow. Your attorney will tell you if that is the case or if you can just request it in court tomorrow.

My opinion only, but I would absolutely ask for the arrears. Like you said it is money owed to your son and he most definitely deserves it!

Best of luck tomorrow and going forward!

Your attorney can request things, but it requires new paperwork and filing fees, so he may just be blowing you off on that one. However, you may get an opportunity to speak. If you do, ask that the support be made retroactive to the date of the original seperation. The judge can make on the spot decisions and often do.

Good luck tomorrow and look your best. You want his last day married to you to be a real eat-your-heart-out kinda day!!! ha!

I can see the appeal of accepting the new amount ($450) now and being done with it....but I honestly feel he should have had to be paying something the whole time...so if I were you, I would fight for it to be retro...I mean c'mon, the child was still needing to eat and stuff all this time, it's not right that only you should have been responsible for his well being this whole time!

Just my opinion...I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to just be done though...at least you got the increase to $450!!

Tell your attorney that she works for YOU and that you want the child support to be retroactive.

$200 a month???? That does not even cover a week of child care. That is obserd. I would fight. I have been there and done that. I have two daughters their dad barely sees them. Sometimes I wished he would just give up his rights and leave my kids alone. All he does is emotionally drag them through the dirt. It is easy to say walk away but you need to do what is best for you and your son. The state will always do what is best for your child, not you nor your ex. The best of luck to you.... that additional $250 a month can really help out. Keep your head up and hang in there!

Divorce is NEVER fun or easy.

Are you trying to drag this out?
Are you trying to hurt him one more time?
What's the point in dragging it out even further?
if the amount is going to change to $450 - what does it matter?

So he wants to get married again - let him go!! Let her deal with him and his issues.

Fighting over money is like trying to slap him one last time before it's officially over - not being rude here - but seriously - what's more important the money or him staying involved in your child's life?

Decide what's more important to you - the hurt you are having because your marriage is over and he's already moved on or your child and your ex's involvement in their life....let him move on....money isn't everything and if you are trying to stick it to him one more time - really - what is this going to get you? a few more dollars? yay for you (being VERY sarcastic here).

ask yourself why it's sooooo important to you to keep this going....if you have that answer - then you are free to move on....seriously...why is it important to give it to him one more time? Just let it go. You will be better off...you HAVE to be able to look at yourself in the mirror every day and more importantly - you HAVE to be able to deal with your ex is a MATURE way in front of the kids.

It could be effective retroactively since September (for which arrears would now be due) or March when it is ordered. I would push for the arrears (I didn't with my ex and ended up back in court for arrears almost immediately so being the nice guy backfired...not worth it).

I dont usually respond this way, but I wanted to say, sorry you felt the need to justify yourself to cheryl O. (who was offering up ZERO advice in regards to what you asked for) Seems to be becoming an epidemic here :) A mom asks for advice regarding an issue, and another mom decides to impart unwanted "wisdom" on her. I would keep calling your lawyer, he/she is really the only one who can answer this question definetively.