Family Won't Respect Wish of Not Feeding My Daughter Pork

Their biggest fear is that you won't let them see her anymore. Take her away for a little while so they get the message. Also, education might help. If they understand why you and many other people around the world don't eat pork then maybe they'll be more compliant.

M.: I hate to tell you, but my family does that with pop. I said absolutely no to pop. As soon as I was gone, here it comes. I think they do it to say that they can. It is anoying, but I don't make too big of a stink anymore ant they don't do it so much. Good luck -- I totally feel for you!

Its simple. They dont respect your wishes, they arent alone with your daughter. Its one thing to cave on a few here n theres just to keep peace but if you believe in it strongly then you have to stand your ground. But in the mean time if they will be watching your daughter, can you provide alternatives to their choices? Not only are you teaching your daughter about healthy choices, but also to stand up for her convictions. Good for you.

This is really easy...don't leave her with them around meal times. If they still do it, then don't leave them with her at all. Remember...this is your child, not theirs...you set the rules not them. When they get upset and ask how come they don't get to keep her unsupervised anymore, then you can tell them that when they learn to follow the rules that you have set for YOUR child, then they can keep her again but in the mean time they will be supervised so that you can be sure that she's not being fed things against your family's health and religion. It may sound mean...it may sound rude, but if you don't nip it in the but right now, it's going to keep happening.

I had a close friend go through this exact thing. She did not eat pork for religous reasons, but the father's family did not respect this.

For one, let them know that pork isn't a necessary component to anyone's diet and can be replaced by any other meat. Let them know that Turkey sausage and beef hotdogs are just as good, and you might even consider sending them with your child while she is with them.

But more importantly your family is underminding your authority as a mother. This is very serious. If they can't respect your wishes then your daughter shouldn't go over there anymore.

I can somewhat relate. I have a 2.5 year old daughter and I choose to not give her sugar. My family (and my in-laws) insist giving her sugar to "win her over". They think it will make her like them better! Crazy! Anyways, the way I handle things is, if they can't respect my wishes they don't get to babysit anymore! I will take her for visits, but not leave her alone with them to give them the opportunity to allow her to indulge!! You have to stand up for what you think is right for you and your child and do something about it or it will never stop!!

Well one your family should respect your wishes. You also have to try and find other babysitters. Some people eat pork and some dont. You also have to respect the ones that do...but if they cant go by what you want..find someone who will.

IMO, they should respect your wishes or else they won't get the chance to be alone with her.

If it's your husband's family, I'd let him deal with them. If it's your own family, I would tell them very directly. You don't have to be rude or anything, I would just tell them that you know you've mentioned it before, but you know how easy it can be to forget things, so you'll say it again that you do not allow pork to be eaten in your house, not inside your house, or outside your house. So, please do not ever give your child any kind of pork. I would also say something to your child about how awful those things are for her and maybe you can have her turning it down on her own. If they still don't listen, then I'd ask them why they fed it to her after you asked them not to and see what they say.

I agree with the others here, if they can't respect your wishes on your child then they don't need to be around her alone

I know that it's difficult, and sometimes we just need some time away from our kids, but if your family won't respect your wishes about her diet, then you could refuse them the right to see her. I had to do that with my older siblings feeding my daughter tomato products when she was 6 months old. I just refused them the right to babysit her until they agreed to my wishes.

Pork does supply essential vitamins that the body needs. I personally don't believe that eating or not eating certain foods will be your ticket to Heaven. But everyone is entitled to their own beliefs.

I feel for you and believe that I am going to be in your shoes real soon. My dad recently told me that grandparents are "immune" from the regular rules. However, my biggest problem is going to be my husband. He tries to give our 8 month old bites of chips, bacon, & today he tried to give him icecream. Our son is on soy formula because he can't handle milk based formula, can you imagine how he'd be if he had icecream?! I've already decided that if I have problems w/the grandparents he just won't stay w/them alone. But what do I do about his father? As for the rest of your family, just stand your ground. You know what is best for your child. Let them know your child is not going to be staying alone w/them until they respect your wishes. Good Luck!

M.,
She needs to experience foods on her own. By giving her pork, you are introducing her to a broader range of choices. Children CAN get burnt out on eating the same things over and over. So your family is trying to help.
And you give her hot dog?? A lot of them have pork in them...

They possibly just might not understand WHY you refuse to eat pork products and don't wish for your daughter to do so. Step back for a bit and choose the best aspect to approach your family for a conversation, but make sure it is in depth as to why pork is unaccecptable and that you are ready and willing to answer any questions they have. I told my parents time and time again that I didn't want my boys having anything with caffine in it and they ignored me every time, but I finally sat down and talked with them and said "This is why I don't like the boys having anything with caffine....." and lined out the reasons why. They now respect mine and hubby's wishes and do not give our kids caffinated drinks anymore. I know it's frustrating, but experience has told me that if they don't truly understand your reasoning behind something like that, they're not going to honor your wishes because they see them fruitless.

I would tell them that if they can't respect your wishes, you won't be leaving her alone with them. It may cause some head aches for you finding a baby sitter, but I guess you just have to ask yourself what is more important, your beliefs or your time in finding someone to stay with her.
Good Luck!