Do You Say Thank You?

Updated on June 25, 2012
D.N. asks from Chicago, IL
60 answers

I went to the store today during lunch and the cashier was surprised that I thanked her for giving me my change. She had this shocked look on her face. I always thank someone that is doing a service, whether it is their job or not. I was once asked by a guy that was behind me at the grocery why I thanked the person taht bagged my stuff and put it in the cart. His reasoning: it is the person's job and they are getting paid for it so why should I thank them as well.
I try to teach my kids to do the same. It is called gratitude and respect.
So do you??

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Well, gotta say I am glad it is not going away. I guess some people don't think it is necessary to thank someone for a service. Common courtesy and respect will get us far. That is what I want my kids to remember if nothing else.

My dad used to sit on the porch and say good morning or good afternoon or jsut hey, how ya doin' to passersby. He would get some smiles and some odd looks. he said the smiles are great, the odd looks are people who need to loosen up and not have their panties in a bunch. (that's my dad!) Not everyone is a stalker. Their loss. I try to remember that.

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Yep--force of habit.
SADLY, sometimes at the store, the customer is the only O. actually SAYING thanks--that stinks!

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

V.P.

answers from Columbus on

Not only is it automatic for me to say thank you, but think what a terrible place it would be to live if those little niceties were to go away.

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.K.

answers from Appleton on

Retail associates shold build a shrine to you. I worked in retail for years and more often I got yelled at by customers because we didn't have what they were looking for than got thanked even when I went way above and beyond.
Yes, I say thank you when an associate helps me. I also wish them a happy weekend or a good day.

6 moms found this helpful

More Answers

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Oh you want to really freak them out, tell them to have a nice day. :)

8 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.S.

answers from Columbia on

Thank you for asking this.

7 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.M.

answers from Dallas on

Yes! I also teach mine please, your welcome, yes maam/no maam and yes sir/no sir. I'm old school like that. :)

I'm constantly amazed at the horrible manners some children exhibit.....even more amazed at the horrible manners of some adults!

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.P.

answers from Sacramento on

Yes I always say thank you, as do my kids. Even if I am at a restraunt and the waitress fills my glass 10X I thank her everytime! Common courtesy and appreciation go a long way.

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.S.

answers from Little Rock on

Yes ma'am! All the time. I'd rather say thank you TOO MUCH than TOO little!

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.M.

answers from Denver on

I always thank people, I probably tend to over-thank (even people who have been nasty)! I cant believe people dont anymore, we are getting so rude! What I really hate is when I hold open the door for someone, often while hoding my little girl and my son running away, and they just breeze by without even noticing I am there usually typing away on their i-phone or whatever! I am not a door man! Urgghhh! Hate that!

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.S.

answers from Washington DC on

YES! And sometimes I feel sooooo annoyed with the fact that almost no one acknowledges the thank you with a your welcome! I say thank you to everyone for just about everything. For example: I go to a drive through and order, they say thats $5 drive around, I say thank you. I get to the window and pay and when they give me my change I say thank you. I get to the other window and get my food and again I say thank you. 98% of the time, the people working at the store do not say thank you or your welcome. This is one area I know I have modeled well for my son, he says thank you to everyone, and is great about saying "no thank you" if he is offered something he does not want. In fact he cracks me up sometimes because I will tell him to do something... like "get your clothes off and get in the bath tub please" and he says.... "no thank you mommy. I need to play with these cars first". hahaha, its hard to get angry with that type of response. :0)

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.B.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, I do. I also use "please" quite liberally as well.

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.Q.

answers from Bellingham on

yes, every single time, with eye contact. also please and you're welcome.

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.G.

answers from Kansas City on

Unfortunately, there are a LOT of rude people in this world. We try to teach our kids to be very polite and respectful.

m

6 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from Boston on

Always. And having worked many years in a grocery store, the baggers are more likely to not squash your stuff if your nice to them. It may be there job, but there is no excuse for rudeness.

5 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.B.

answers from Austin on

Heck, yes...... I thank them for their good service! I don't care whether they are getting paid for serving us, I feel it is proper to treat others as I would like to be treated.. (and yes, I've been a cashier....)

I don't say what I am thanking them for, but usually when they give me the receipt and change, I say "Thank You..... have a great day!" I also have a genuine smile, too. And... I've had a couple of the cashiers/baggers comment on my positive attitude...some time later! That really made my day!

Cashiers, especially, seem to the the end of the stick when it comes to customer comments..... the customer tends to dump on the cashier about whatever frustrations they dealt with, especially in the store.

Yes... we need much more gratitude and respect in our day!

5 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I do ALL THE TIME!! I cannot STAND when people don't say thank you. It's the whole entitlement thing going on in America.

I always tell them thanks and have a great day...always.

5 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D..

answers from Charlotte on

I do say thank you, but it's more perfunctory in this circumstance. I actually expect the cashier to tell me thank you for shopping at the store, and then I tell her that she is welcome. That's more important than telling her thank you for my change. (Which I don't mind doing. Usually I'm not getting change back, though.)

One of the problems with retail is that they don't teach their staff to show gratitude or give good service to the customers. The retail that IS successful uses business models that work, AND give customers a good shopping experience.

Gratitude and respect are important on both sides, but it's more important for the employee to show it to the customer. We can always shop elsewhere.

Dawn

5 moms found this helpful

I.G.

answers from Austin on

I always say thank you. All the time. Even if I'm not in the best mood and dealing with people...they may just get a mumbled 'thank you' but they do get one. :)
Having manners doesn't cost anything.

4 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I always say please and thank you, regardless of whether the person is getting paid to serve me. I am polite even if the person has not done a great job, or been particularly polite themselves. I imagine that if enough people have the attitude of the man in the post, it would explain the reason some people working in the service industry aren't as polite as they should be.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.P.

answers from Seattle on

With the way people have become these days it can be quite shocking when you come across someone who knows their please and thank you's. Even more shocking when they say have a nice day, or even ask how you are doing.

I always find it refreshing when people are polite to me or others around.

I always say thank you, even when I am in a bad mood. It's just common courtesy to do so, and I try my hardest to teach my son to do the same.

If everyone would just say thank you, please, and all that seemingly old fashioned manners maybe the world would be just a bit happier.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.R.

answers from Kansas City on

I have always worked in retail and the habit of saying please and thank you and have a nice day are so ingrained into my very soul that I don't think I could go anywhere and do anything without saying those phrases!

But what I really, really like is when customers are in my store on a holiday (thanksgiving, christmas eve, easter, etc.) and they, without any prompting at all, will say 'Thank you for working today!' because yeah, it's nice to be thanked for working a day that most everyone else has off to enjoy and if we weren't here ... they couldn't be doing their last-minute shopping either!

And since my now adult!kids grew up with this career/life, they all know to show respect and consideration to people that are working a job for their benefit.

Love, love, love the 'Attitude of Gratitude' comment before mine!

:)

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I thank everyone for doing anything for me even if it is their job. I know I appreciate it when a client thanks me. Heck I have even caught myself thanking someone who called me and asked me to do something for them! Saying thank you is a habit everyone should get into.

I thank the doctor, the grocery store clerk, the waitress, the person who lets me in the lane ahead of them, etc.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from Savannah on

I've been teased that I say thank you, have a good day, and USUALLY make eye contact by friends that say "Wow---we can tell you worked retail before, but you're on the other side of the register now". But me, I think it's called being a nice and pleasant human being. OF COURSE I say thank you when handed something.

4 moms found this helpful

☼.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Yeah, it's just a habit for me. I automatically say thanks, I don't even think about it.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.T.

answers from New York on

Yes - it's a habit and sometimes I want to stop bc it kills me when the cashier doesn't thank ME too! Aren't sales people supposed to routinely thank paying customers? I've worked retail and it was automatic to thank someone as they paid you. And I thank the person who bags my stuff and typically try to help them. I pretty much thank anyone who does anything for me...

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.P.

answers from Portland on

I nearly always say thank you for a service. So what if it's their job. Wouldn't mothers appreciate more thank yous? Fathers too for that matter.

I force myself to say thank you for poor service too. Who knows what their day is like and a thank you might get better service for the next person.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.M.

answers from Dallas on

I try my best to say thank you and to have a nice day.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.P.

answers from Houston on

Uh, yeah. That guy was weird.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

Yes, & if they are wearing a name tag, I say their name. I also open doors for people, & many times have NOT recieved a "Thank You". When this happens when my children are with me, I let them know that the person was Rude & to please not treat people this way.

3 moms found this helpful

T.K.

answers from Dallas on

I always say thank you, but heres the messed up part....it annoys me when they say "youre welcome"! Thats so rude! They are supposed to say thank you back, for my business. I appreciate them, but hey, how about appreciating me! Dont say "youre welcome" like you went out of your way for me or something!

3 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I always say thank you. I was raised that way and I have raised my daughter the same way.

It is just respectful and the right thing to do.

3 moms found this helpful

B.B.

answers from Evansville on

I thank all the polite and pleasant ones. Otherwise, I don't thank anyone for bad service.

3 moms found this helpful

R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

I always do.

More times than not I get the weird looks when my kids say it ( more shocked I think). I have taught them to always use their manners no matter where we are at. I think people are use to our generation using our manners... but don't see it a lot with the next generation in setting like that.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.L.

answers from Atlanta on

Yep, I do and I remind my kids to say please and thank you to everyone (including me). I'm living in the South, where some secretaries have 'Thank you' programmed into their email signature, so I think it would be strange (and rude) if I didn't say thanks to a store employee who did a service for me! I hope you keep on making people's day by using those little words.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Of course I say thank you. Always have, and now I am modelling the behavior for my son.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Its called the attitude of gratitude. I thank many people for doing nice things. I like to surprise people with nice words to make them smile. Thank you is seldom heard anymore because of the "It's all about me" attitude too many people have.

The one I have used t bring a smile to the face to may people is I tell them "Thank you" and leave it like that. Usually they ask, "What for?" I tell them, "For sharing your beautiful smile". Amost without exception, they look and smile real big and it is a beautiful smile. It makes my day, and based on the reaction I get from most people, it makes their day too.

So I am able to spread a little joy and it doesn't cost me anything.

Good luck to you and yours.

3 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

Every transaction where people help me..we do it here in the house with each other.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.G.

answers from New York on

Yes!! Of course. Makes me think of that TV commercial (don't know what it's for) where one person does something nice... and then that person does something nice for someone else... love it. Keep spreading the love and respect! :-)

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.T.

answers from New York on

Habit for my husband and I and we are teaching our daughter the same.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.G.

answers from Seattle on

Yes I do and yes it is taught to our children as well. Granted my 5 year old nonverbal boy cannot say thank you but he certainly signs it. More often than not I do have to explain that he is saying thank you. Some of the time we get the respect back for saying thank you other times we get stared at funny as if teaching him to say thank you is somehow less valuable than a verbalized thank you.

I think common manners such as please and thank you are dying expressions and some of the time people don't know how to react.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.L.

answers from Amarillo on

hmmm idk if i just live in a very friendly town but its weird to me that the person would be shocked that you said thank you!!!

i tell everyone that does anything for me thank you!!

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.M.

answers from Tampa on

We use please and thank you all the time. Trying to keep some morals and values instilled in our kids.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Most of the time, yes. Even if it's their job, it's nice to thank people.

3 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Oh my gosh, how sad that people are surprised when one says "Thank You" to another. I say it all the time.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.U.

answers from Dallas on

I always thank most everyone I interact with and appreciate the same manners in return, good for you :)

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.W.

answers from Portland on

Yes. All the time. Everyone is doing their work and I figure people who do any sort of service work have to deal with a lot of demands and stress each day. It's easy to make someone's day a teeny bit better by thanking them with a smile and wishing them a good day.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K..

answers from Phoenix on

Yes, I am anal about saying "please" and "thank you" with myself as well as my DD.

Since customer service is part of my job, I also like to ask people how their day is going, how they're doing, etc. and tell them to have a nice day. I just think it's nice to show someone you care .

2 moms found this helpful

A.D.

answers from Alexandria on

Yes and I teach mine the same.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Chicago on

I always say thank you. To cashiers, to attendants who help me out in aisles, to waiters in restaurants, to call-center attendees who answer my queries (even when they're of no help, at times..). I smile or say a 'hello' to people whom I meet while going for a walk, or say, 'Good day to you too' if someone says a hello or so to me first.
I was just taught that its good manners to thank when someone does something for you, or to wish courteously, and it never occurred to me to question it, I guess...
Oh, we just taught our 20 mos old to say 'thank you' whenever someone hands her something she asks for, and so my house is ringing with 'thaaakyuuu' all the time now.. :D

1 mom found this helpful

K.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

Manners are HUGE in our house!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.H.

answers from Chicago on

I say thank you when cashiers hand me change but it annoys me when they don't thank me for shopping in the store.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.E.

answers from Denver on

Yes. I tend to make small talk with cashiers too.

I know, for me, if no one ever shows appreciation for what I accomplish, it doesn't feel good. I am in a very specialized field but it is not a highly valued one; it's a regulatory required one. Lots of responsibility, little authority, virtually no recognition.

Yes, I am supposed to do my job. And yes, I get paid (well). But when people behave like I should ride a motorcycle over a flaming river of lava to get a "thank you", it stinks.

I assume that stinks for service personnel too.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.K.

answers from Albuquerque on

I try to thank people for anything that they do for me, that is nice or that makes things easier. I think everyone needs the positive.

My husband and I recently got into this conversation because he doesn't feel it necessary to thank someone for something that they are supposed to do. I told him that just because I'm the one who stays home doesn't mean that I don't like some show of appreciation for keeping the house clean.

1 mom found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

uuuummmm YEAH!!!!

Just because it's their job doesn't mean you can't THANK them for it!! it's called being polite! Having manners!!! it seems that many people are letting manners go by the way-side (no rsvp's to parties, no thank you notes for presents or something else, etc.)

I say a HUGE thank you when they COUNT my change back to me or ask to see my ID when I present my debit/"credit" card and verify the name is the same!!! I LOVE having my change COUNTED back, not just HANDED to me!! Some of them laugh when I say it - but I REALLY do love it!!!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.G.

answers from Rockford on

Always. I always thank people who are doing me a service. I am a generally polite person, but I do it because I think that if they are doing the task, then I don't have to do it myself, which is helpful to me and therefore requires a thanking. If they are paid for it makes no difference to me. Being polite is something I try to stress to my kids too. Sometimes I wonder how good of a job I am doing with it, but they are generally good with their Thank You's, Please seems to be a little more difficult. (Especially for my 2 year old! ha! ha!)
I am always amazed by the looks I get from the wait staff at restaurants when I thank the server for refilling my drink/water. I have actually had them pause for a minute and process what was just said, then they get a strange look on their face, kind of like I have three eyeballs, and then they say, "Oh, you are welcome!" HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.P.

answers from Chicago on

YES! And I'm so glad I'm not the only one! :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.G.

answers from New York on

yes absoultely.. was the girl working there very young.. I just think this generation doesn't know how to respect any age.. It drives me nuts when someone doesn't say thank you. I even hold doors open for the elderly etc. or when people hold doors for me at the gym when i have my two kids with me i say thank you. they say your welcome.
You should of said to the girl thank you about 3x's ahaaahahahah she would of really been shocked

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

I always say please and thank you. Always. They are the three most important words we can ever use and teach our children... even if it's only out of habit.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.S.

answers from Tucson on

Absolutely yes!! My sister and I were raised to be polite, courteous and have respect for others and I am trying to raise my children to be the same. It's appaling to see how little manners people have anymore and I see it from all ages. Simple "Thank you's" and "Your welcome" should not be absent from our everyday vocabulary. Like many have said previously, it makes others feel good, respected, visible, human,ect. It need to be part of our everyday interactions with each other once again. There are too many "things" out there that limit our interaction and in turn are making it less common for people just to acknowledge one anothers presence. It takes little effort and can make such a huge impact on someone elses day.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

Of course. It would be wrong not to. I will also say have a good night/day.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions