Depression - West Palm Beach, FL

I think that p.p. depression can take several months to go away. Hormones are crazy. The only suggestion I have is to work out. The YMCA has a great program. They'll watch your children for two hours a day for you while you work out. The chemicals released during exercise are miracle workers. I've been doing it thanks to the advice of a friend that went through the same thing, and it has made a huge difference. Once you start, it gets addicting. The Y has a great program. There are classed all day long every day, so you can find the one that you like and start like that. You'll feel so great and want to go back. Plus, the KidZone is great with kids. Your whole outlook will change and you'll feel so much better about yourself and have more patience with your children. It's like the ultimate, all natural regulator or hormones.

Mrs. D., you've made the first step and that is, admitting that you are depressed. I was diagnosed with clinical depression about 10 years ago, I have a son who is 3 and another that is 2. I am a divorced, single mother, working 40 hours a week and going to school full time. If you have been diagnosed with clinical depression, I am assuming that you have been to your doctor and have been prescribed an antidepressant or antianxiety medication. Post partum is normal and you need to understand that you are certainly not the only one who has balled up and cried for no reason. Your body is going through so many hormone changes. As far as a time limit for post partum, I don't think 3-4 months is unusual. I didn't have it with my first child but my second one started when he was about 2 months and lasted until about 4 1/2 months. I think that while we can take all these medications that we are prescribed, we also have to make a consicious decision that we are not going to allow depression to consume our lives. We have our children to live for and giving them the proper care is the most important thing. If you haven't been to the doctor, you should definitely get yourself to one. Besides medication, you should take walks, read books, talk to your husband into keeping the babies while you go get a pedicure. You just need to manage your time. I don't mean spoil yourself all the time, but you do need some time to yourself to relax. Even if it's for ten minutes at a time. (I know you are thinking "how in the world am I supposed to do that with everything else I have to do?". You have to make a schedule and stick to it in order to manage your time so that you can take a few minutes to yourself. Also, another thing that helped me was writing. (I still do this) but at the end of the day, if you take a few minutes right before bed, get a pen and a piece of paper, and write down how you felt all day, what things occured and which ones stressed you out or made you happy. While I agree that depression is not something that you can just "get over", you have a choice in this situation. That is to understand depression. You have to find ways of controlling it, so that it will fit to your life style. Just remember that depression is not something that you just "get over" in one day, or two months, or even years. Just understand that you aren't fighting the battle alone! As mother's we are all in this together.
I hope this will help you and your family! Take care and good luck!
Sincerely,
A.

Hi, I hate depression, too! I believe I lacked something that my body needed because I got depressed when I was pregnant with my first baby. I know that eating a lot of meat (read about that somewhere about the chicken, steak, etc. ) helps pull you out of depression. I don't know what that chemical was that u need to keep yourself above the line. Exercise helps release a "happy" chemical and will keep you from being cranky or depressed (Legally Blonde movie says so, ha ha, but it's true.)Also, ah, unfortunately, I don't know how spiritual you are, but "like a deer panting for water, so does my soul pants for you, O God" speaks the truth. If you haven't been feeding the word of God, you will definitely feel depressed every day of your life. You've feed your body with food. You've feed your mind with thoughts, books, visions, dreams. But what do you feed your heart? Nothing but the words of God. You can get much blessing from the Holy Bible. I have starved my soul too long and when I talk about God or read to God, or hide in my closet to pray to God for His strength, oh, I felt like my heart was filling with His grace. It was awesome feeling. It takes time to feed your heart to get you out of your depression. I promise you, in Jesus's name, you will feel so much better. Don't forget your exercise and eat good food, too!

I believe that is normal. You may need something stronger than herbal supplements (like a px) just to get you through this tough time.

Hi D., I had the same problem after my second child. You'll be ok, think positive and tell yourself I just had a baby it ok for me to be tired and down, you also have one other child who is still very young, you should be tired. It is good to cry when you feel like it, crying helps and telling yourself how you feel it's ok too. Sometimes when I felt so down and tired and felt like their was so much to do and I felt overwhelmed I would stop everything I was doing make sure my kids were in a safe spot or I would just cry right where I was at, I mean I would let it all out into a pillow or my hands. I found that I felt so much better and was more loving to my children if I would just express how I was feeling. We are aloud to just break down sometimes,we have to remember we are just moms not superheros. I found that I could acomplish more too, my house, kids, shopping, and doing what I needed to do for my children. I would also make sure that I always did some kind of physical exercise every other day. Remember you just had your baby and it takes time to get back into shape, you can't rush it or you will frustrate yourself and become down. Hope this helps. Also remember to pray if you believe in praying ask for strength each day. We are all different and some of us feel our feelings a little more than others.

Melanie

Hi D.,

A little depression is somewhat normal after childbirth. “Serious” mood swings are not. It tells me that something in your system is a little off kilter, probably exacerbated by the birthing process. It should be a simple fix. I didn't say quick, I said simple :)

My very first suggestion would be to get to a chiropractor. Besides helping your immune system and your overall health, a spinal adjustment can correct anything neurological that is affecting your moods and thoughts. I personally recommend an Upper Cervical Specialist. They are truly in tune with your entire body, not just one symptom. (upcspine.com has a listing of local ones in each state. They are listed in no particular order so just read thru them.)

The next thing I would recommend is nutrition. Improper nutrition can affect, not only your weight but, your mood. If you can’t stop eating, I'm sure you're not going for the greens, lol. You really need to be on a good ABSORBABLE multivitamin that can give you the nutrition and the energy you need to keep up with your little ones. Not just any multivitamin will help and some will actually do more harm. Herbal supplements can be great, but they can also be useless if your body is not in good working order.

If you want to go this route, please write back and ask, I'd love to give you some additional information.

Regards,
M.

Postpartum depression can be present up to 10 years after having a baby.
You need to see your doctor (Gyno) and tell him everything you are feeling. He needs to be aware and there may be a temporary medication you can take to get you through this time. Just make sure that whatever they may prescribe, you check out the side effects and that it does not have an addictive nature.
T.

Hi D.,
I have had PPD with my two sons so I know what you are feeling. With my first son I did not seek treatment right away b/c I thought I could "handle it". Looking back I was not the mother I could have been. I was moody and cranky. My doc gave me anti-depressant and it really made a difference. I really hope you feel better and find something that works for you.
M.

I had PPD with my second and what worked for me was to get outside in the sun for 15-20 minutes a day with the baby in a sling or while baby was napping and I would bring the monitor outside with me while my oldest was playing.

Exercise was also a big help. I would put the kids in a double stroller around mid morning nap time for the baby and go for a walk around the neighborhood.

Fluid intake is also important. Make sure you are getting plenty of filtered, plain water. Coconut water (from Whole Foods or Chamberlains) also works great if you are looking for something sweet to drink that doesn't have sugar in it.

And last but not least, make sure you are getting 8 hours of sleep a day. Your sleep is still probably very interrupted so try to schedule in 9-10 hours to account for interruptions.

Hope that helps,

G. G., Wellness Coach

please see your doctor! You may need more than herbal supplements.

K. G.

YES! Postpartum depression hit me right after my daughter turned 4 months old. I thought I had beat it and was good to go after a few months of having my daughter, but apparently it can hit whenever and according to my OB it can come and go for a full year. I also had a friend who didn't have PPD until her daughter was over a year.

I am currently taking 100mg of Zoloft and feel so much better. I am so sorry to read you are dealing with this because I know first hand how awful it is. If you ever need to talk about this please feel free to email me even though I am a complete stranger. I will lend an ear any time!

i'm so sorry to hear youre down. maybe look into some natural remedies before going on medication, which can and usually is dangerous. Omega-3 is great for this. Also, Andrea Larsen is a nutritional consultant that i refer to often for any problems that my family encounters (i've been seeing her for about 8 years now.) and she is SO helpful. she is located in n. miami. you can say i refered you if you like. but u can call and leave a message/question for her. her number is ###-###-####. Also, are you a christian? I know that whatever you are going through, the Lord is big enough to hold you and carry you and your family thru. He can bring joy to your heart even when you think there is NO way. He makes a way. I know that is true first hand. well, i will keep you and your family in prayer. =)
M.

I was watching a doctor giving the reason for depression in the brain. It is a lack of omega 3 which the baby would have taken from your body to create its brain. I have just come across an amazing whole food with the highest omega 3's more that fish.

H.

Hi D.,
Same thing happened to me, ask the Dr to prescribe an anti-depressant, or get over the counter St. John's Wart (it's an herb, but takes almost 2 wks to work). Ive heard people say it,s ok to eat alot and often AS LONG AS IT'S HEALTHY AND SUGAR/FAT FREE FOODS AND SNACKS.

Good Luck and God Bless. D. P.

Yes. I sure have. It takes a while, at times, for post-partum to set it and it is not consistent across persons/pregnancies. Because you have had issues with depression in the past, this is certainly something that can occur at various times when your body chemistry is set up for changes.

Herbal supplements and exercise can be very helpful - for mild cases of depression. But - with a 3 yr old, I can only assume you are TIRED, not LACKING IN EXERCISE - and - so:

Be SURE to get enough rest...that man of your dreams may have to step up to the plate even more to take over more with Jacob and dinner, etc...so you can nap - for a while...but - do be sure to get enough exercise...(go for a child-free walk, for instance!)

AND - please - for you and your wonderful family - see your doctor asap...you will probably not need them for a long time, but some kind of anti-depressant (not Xanax, not Prozac - just a mild anti-depressant) is probably necessary for a while...

Sorry to be so bossy - but - I worry about we moms who worry about ourselves - but - for the sake of the family - don't do what we need to do...if the anti-depressant causes you do need to stop nursing - so be it. I don't want to worry you - but - the danger of the main caretaker having major depression without treatment is more severe than the "danger" of being on modern formula (which is just not that severe a danger...yes - breastfeeding is better - but we are not measuring the benefits of breastfeeding vs formula...we are measuring the benefits of breastfeeding by a depressed, "crank(y)" mother and the benefits of formula feeding a calm, composed and feeling much better about herself, her family and the world mother. Right?

(Yes - I do know this from personal experience - and - most often it happens after the first child - but - sometimes it is after the second - or fifth...)

Good luck. This too shall pass and your beautiful family will be happy to have the "real" you back!

After my 3rd was born, for about 8-12 weeks everything was fantastic. I would just stare at him and smother him with kisses. Things were super. Then around the 3rd month I started having the same feelings that you described above. It was awful. I was convinced that I would trip going down the stairs or drop him or some kind of accident would happen. So I pulled away and became irritable and moody and cranky and very sad. Then I went to my doctor. He told me that most women get some form of the baby blues shortly after birth, but that most cases of post partum depression start a bit later. I did get some anti-depressants. And within a month or two I was feeling better again. That was almost 4 years ago and I have not been taking those pills since. I just needed a chemical boost to push me out of that fog. I tried doing it on my own and with all the sound advice already given, and when that didn't work, it made me feel guilty because I couldn't handle it myself. Actually made it worse. I continued with the other advice after getting the anti-depressants and then it really helped. See your doctor and find out what will work for you.

D.,

I'm not sure if it was really depression or not, but I had a lot of mood swings and "blues", with tons of crying at 5.5 months...when I was weaning my son and getting ready to go back to work full time. I attributed it to the hormone changes associated with stopping the breast feeding at the time...but maybe not.

Hang in there, and seek help if you need it.
C.

Go talk to your Dr, sweetie. PPD is treatable, and does not necessarily happen after each child--it is more common though for those of us that have had depression in the past. And the lack of sleep that is expected with a newborn only makes it worse. So please go talk to your Dr so he can give you something that will help! Do it for yourself and ALL of your children!

Hi D., It sounds like depression to me, only it started a little later than some. Go to your doctor and tell him everything, "and I mean everything" about how you feel. I hope you feel better soon. M. H.

Hi, D.. Hey, Sweetie, don't be down on yourself. Even if you didn't have postpartum right after you gave birth, you are right at the point where it's hitting you just how different your life is with TWO kids. If you had an easy time with the first one, but now you're finding out that it's tougher to deal with two at once, then that helps explain why you're not feeling yourself right now.

Don't think for a minute that your body isn't going through hormonal changes even now! Your body isn't going to be back to "normal" for the better part of the year after giving birth, particularly if there were any complications or if the birth was difficult. If you've had a C-section, well, your body is STILL dealing with getting rid of the anesthetia, believe it or not.

And I would bet that you're not getting enough sleep, either. Am I right? Sleep deprivation will cause changes in hormones, energy level, even brain chemistry. You need to find some way to get more sleep, take vitamins, particularly B vitamins and C.

And get someone to give you a hand. The mess factor from two children is not double that of one child, it's triple or quadruple. And trying to help the older child adjust to the baby is a full-time job in itself. Your relationship with your son understandably changes; he goes from being your only child to being your first-born, and this is a big adjustment for both of you, even if he's taking it well.

Things have changed, and they will never be the same again, even though it's wonderful to have the miracle of your daughter in your life. Sometimes these kinds of changes can be as difficult as they are wonderful. Psychologists call this "eustress," which is a fancy way of saying "good stress," but it's still stressful. So don't be hard on yourself for needing some space for adjustment. It's natural, actually.

Appearance: Well, if you're not sleeping enough, and all the exercise you get is chasing a toddler and changing diapers, well, you can't expect to look like the ladies do on "Desperate Housewives." I'm sure you look just beautiful, but you're tired, and when you FEEL tired and it shows in your expression, it makes you exagerrate every "flaw." #1 beauty secret is always sleep. #2 is make sure you have time to shower and wash your hair. See if you can get a babysitter to give you a day off so that you can give yourself some pampering -- not the diaper kind, either. ( : You know what makes a stressful situation even worse? Pretending to everyone else that you don't need any help and everything is perfect. Heck, Hon, nobody's life is perfect, and anyone who tells you that you have to be the perfect mom without any snags in your life is LYING.

If being kinder to yourself by taking better care of yourself doesn't start to clear it up, then please get a physical. It may something as simple as a nutritional need such as a better electrolyte balance, or perhaps your blood pressure needs to be adjusted.

Sweetie, I hope these suggestions are helpful. I wish you all the best!
Peace,
Syl

I had the same issues after 5 months. If you don't get enough sleep you can definitely have lots of problems. Your body need sleep cycles of over 4 hours so that your liver can clear your blood and keep you healthy. That is what and acupuncture doctor told me.

Try to get sleep, take fish oil or Omega Oils, I took 4,000 grams a day of Biomega from USANA. I also added Rodeola? it is a stress adaptagen.

I hope you feel better soon. When I hit the bottom my husband decided it was time to make sure I was getting enough sleep.

The closest I had was a bit of baby blues, but everyone is different. As far as I understand, postpartum depression can occur as far out as 2years after the baby is born. I don't think 3-4 months out is all that far out. Your body may have gone through some significant changes in hormone levels, and life can be quite a bit different going from one to two little ones. Top that off with life's little problems, elections, global issues, and the current economic issues, I think depression could easily occur, especially considering your past history of clinical depression. I'm no expert though, this is something that you really should see a Dr. about. You should probably be able to call the Dr you had during the pregnancy, and that person should be able to get you in touch with a Dr who deals with Postpartum Depression. I think it is far better to address this now rather than waiting while the problems you are dealing with could deteriorate to far worse if unchecked. That's just my 2 cents worth.

My husband left to boot camp when my son was only 3 months old. i had no depression before that. THe day after he left all I could do is cry. I had to leave work numerous times because I couldn't stop crying. I am not the type to cry either. I cried for a month nonstop over everything. I couldn't even put up my son's playpen without breaking down. i never put it together that it could be post pardum depression because of it happening so late after I had him. But I am positive it was. I never got any help because by the time I realized it I was better. When my husband got discharged from the army because of feet problems I couldn't even talk to him or stand the site of him. I think the hormone change was still affecting me. I was depressed over him having to leave. I think he should have fought the discharge let his feet heal and try boot camp one more time. What were we going to do with 3 kids and him having no job. It has been 3 weeks since he came back and I am doing better now, much happier. The hormone changes went from me being depressed over him being gone and wanting him home to being depressed over him coming home. I can't explain it all I can say is yes it does happen that late I am proof of it.

Women don't tell each other that mothering is the hardest and most thankless job out there. It is a stressful time right now and couple that with the isolation of staying home or the exhaustion of working it's hard. You need mommy friends. Support from other women in the same boat will work wonders.