Dealing with Separation Anxiety

My daughter was about that same age when she had it, and it only lasted about a 6 weeks or so (she's a very social child though, so yours may take longer). It's totally normal at that age, and I think having her go to a daycare would make the problem worse - after all, you'd be making her fears come true !!! Assuming you socialize with other children and adults on a regular basis, your child will grow out of it as other things begin to pique her interest more.

11 months is on target for separation anxiety, its normal, so dont worry. my LO is 16 months and still has really clingy days.They are working through so much stuff at that point, both physically and mentally, It makes sense that they may need a little extra mama love. Still, I can see how the frequency and intensity of it could drive you a little batty, maybe some more social interaction with other moms and babies could help ease the way to his being at ease around others ,yet knowing you are close by. in any case, I assure you it will pass. 11 months is an intense time. They are Typically working on crawling/ standing/ walking and the drive for more independence , its usually"one step forward, two steps back" ( thus, the clinginess factor).Sorry I cant offer recomendations, just support. Good luck mama and hang in there!

I also received similar advice from some friends of mine regarding my daughters clinginess when she was 11 months old... and that advice seems to persist. but for me, just leaving her when she was in this state of obvious need for me did not feel right. i agree that we have to seek out opportunities to socialize our children but a half-day daycare program may be an abrupt shift for your little guy. i have been looking into activities where other children are around, but i am there too... like music lessons, gymnastics and play dates. i have also been paying attention to which of my adult friends she gravitates towards and finding opportunities for her to spend time with those adults for short and then gradually longer periods of time... in essence, letting her choose her baby sitters of the near future. anyhow, she is 14 months old now and actually, for the first time the other day, smiled and waved good-bye to me when i left to go pick my friend up from the airport. she is finally getting that mommy comes back after she goes away. as well, now that my daughter has developed a comfort with some friends of mine, my husband and i feel ready to try leaving her with them for a couple hours while we have a date night. gradually, i intend to graduate from play groups/activities that involve my participation to ones where i am not around. my point S., is that i have been following my daughters cues and basing my decisions on socializing her on her cues for readiness, not other peoples judgements about how clingy she is. i believe that as long as we continue to offer opportunities for them to be independent, they will make the choice based on their readiness. this is just my opinion because leaving my crying child when she clearly needs me does not feel right to me. not every mom is afforded this luxury and i feel lucky to be in a position where i am not forced to leave her (due to work or whatever) and i see that in a relatively short period of time, her independence is emerging. this is a hard decision for you to make and i encourage you to do what feels best to you.

Hi S., At 11 months, what your son is going through is very normal and he will grow out of it. All of mine had those fears from about 9 months. Today there are more because so many moms have to go to work. I know lots of people want to give advice but I think he is young for day care if you can stay home with him. Try taking him to a mommy and me so he can start to socialize with other children his age. Do what your heart says!!! Grandma Mary

My son was exactly the same. He never let me even go to the restrooms. I was lucky, I am a stay at home mom. so I could give him the extra time that he needed.

The advantage with these kids are, they are much more focused. If you read books for him, he will grasp it in no time. To pass our time, I used to read books for him. My son, would recognize numbers and letters even before he turned 18 months.

With this approach, the only precaution you got to take is, he should not control you. If you dont have to send him to daycare, please dont send him. They will fall sick very often there. Gradually take him to mommy and me classes after he turns two.

Enjoy the time you are spending with him. you will never get this time once he grows up. Now, my son is three. He plays well with other kids. Ready to go to pre-school.

regards
M.