Christmas - Mount Morris,MI

I am sorry to hear about your situation. I would not tell the kids there is no Santa. Could their father or grandparents help out so that they could each get one Santa present? And then tell them that there are lots of kids who need presents this year so Santa has to limit to one each? There are also agencies you might be able to contact to get a present for each child.

I would focus on the magic of the season though. Make a special meal, let them stay up late to watch a Christmas movie, go for a drive and look at Christmas lights. Kids are pretty great and I bet it won't phase them as much as you think.

I feel you because I had a Christmas like that before! But yah know you could just get them some little things like from the $Dollar store! But definatly sit down with the kids' and tell them that you'll loose your house if you buy Christmas presents this year But tell them that Santa will bring them a couple presents and then give them the little things you buy them from the $dollar store! And explain to them that it's the thought that counts! And tell them you love them and always will!

T.,

I'm sorry for your situation. I would not, however, do anything with the mortgage money except pay the mortgage with it. That would not be a responsible example to your children. Is there any way to have the kids gifts from their father be from Santa? Could you approach it with your ex as a you get to be Santa this year type thing? That way you don't look so vulnerable to your ex but the kids still get to have Santa. Or have them be at his house on actual Christmas morning? Then you could explain to them that your presents to them will be a little delayed this year. I have no idea what the living arrangements are for your family and if those suggestions would even be possible. I would also check out local churches. I know my own parish has Giving Trees where parishioners take tags off the trees and get the gifts and give them to the church to distribute. You could tell them the truth about Santa, they seem to be that age almost anyway. You could explain that St. Nicholas is the original Santa and that he was a very generous man and loved God and that's why he gave to people and children. Maybe that way you can tie God into the picture and still have them be very trustworthy of the notion of God. I would also say to pray about this matter and ask God for help, it may not be what you planned or wanted or expected but God knows better then we do. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

Hi,
I'm so sorry to hear your story, I'm also struggling this Christmas season. Maybe this Christmas, since your kids are a little older, you could teach them about the value of giving. Instead of opening gifts on Christmas morning maybe the entire family could volunteer at a soup kitchen, or go visit the elderly in nursing homes. And then explain to them that you can have your Christmas at a later date. I know it won't be the same, but I'm sure the people you decided to help would greatly appreciate it. Good luck and Merry Christmas!

As hard as it may be to do, there is no shame in asking for help. And the sooner the better. Try to get into the Toys for Tots program (I realize you kids aren't "tots" but I believe they accept all ages). Also there is the Salvation Army, Goodwill, Women's Resource Center, etc. We just sponsored a mom with 3 kids through the Salvation Army in our area, and there are SOOO many programs out there. But don't wait any longer or you may miss out. If you don't qualify for one, try the next. They all have different rules. There are so many kind hearts in your community who understand the situation and would love to help out. Don't make your kids grow up quicker than you want them to. Let them keep their belief in Santa as long as you want to. But at the same time, they won't be harmed if you tell them the truth. There are a lot of little white lies out there (Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc) that you'll have to straighten out at some point, but I wouldn't fear that they will doubt you or what is real (God, for instance). Best of luck to you and blessings to your family.

T., have you been late before on your mortgage? if not give them children a chritmas.No child needs everything they see, but a few nice things, and you can also get help from salvation army. I would personnaly pay a late fee than to see a child without christmas

Hi T.,
I also think that maybe tell your kids that Santa has so many kids this year that there isn't alot of room on his sleigh. I would also look into any programs the state has to offer.

I have a friend that has kids around the age as mine and we do toy swaps. We box up a bunch of toys and so do they and then we trade. Usually its just temporary but if you have a friend or family you could do it permantly. That way you could get rid of toys that the kids don't play with and get toys for free. Just an idea.

Good luck and try not to stress so much. The holidays are a wonderful time.
Chris

I may not be the best person to answer this but I want people to know. I feel the same way you do, about Santa and God. Everyone make santa out to be this godly person and I think it miss leads them. I am a mother of a 2yr old girl and a 7month old boy and I am going to tell them the truth. I will tell them the STORY of santa because thats what it is a story. I want my children to know the TRUE meaning of christmas. It has NOTHING to do with santa. Its about the birth of our lord Jesus. I want christmas in my house to be about giving NOT getting. I think that its best to tell your children the truth from the start. But you can't go back and do that, so what I would do is tell them the truth now.

You can call the lions club they will fill you a basket of food and gifts for your children also local churches. I know you are not needy but a helping hand can give you the break your looking for. Just remember when you have a little extra sometime you can give back. Good luck and Merry Christmas.

T., I am a firm believer in the Power of Prayer and will keep you in prayer. As for what to do about your children, I sincerely believe it would be better now to tell them that Santa is make believe and God is real. At the ages you give for them I think they are old enough to understand that you told them Santa existed to make Christmas more fun, but because of hardships this year they should know the truth. I have a ten year old (just turned ten on Dec. 3) and this year we lost my mother and her best friend/companion. I always make a point of telling him that although this has been a DIFFERENT year, it has not been DIFFICULT, because God has been good to us. I am blessed to have a sister who helps me a lot with raising my son and a couple of close friends as well. I like to take him on inexpensive outings and 'tour' our own city. He has known since about the age of 3 or four that Santa is make believe and that God really does exist. Again, I will keep you in prayer and hope that whatever decision you make will be of comfort to you and your children. I also hope that your ex steps up to the plate and makes Christmas Joyful again in spite of the split.

Take care and take heart.

M.

This year Christmas is hard for all. But if you want to tell your kids. Tell them the story of Sint Klaas. He was real. He gave gifts in children shoes. He is where santa came from.
http://www.the-north-pole.com/history/ . then let them know that Jesus is real too. Just let them know that the spirit of santa claus is still around. (this is what I told My son). It is the spirit of kindness and giving. Instead of getting a toy, let them find the joy of giving. Have them find a toy that they don,t (or go to the dollar store) want anymore and try to donate it (childrens hospitol, a family in need, salvation army).
But I know That it is not fair to your kids. Try going to your church, or salvation army, toys of tots and explain the situation. I am sure someone will help you in your time of need. Heck I would love to help but I am in a similar situation. Just have faith and what comes around goes around.

dear T.
it is always hard to know when to tell our kids we are the santa.kids are only kids for such short time so if i were you i would look in to the church program call toy for tots and other groups like that i also know alot of time radio station are willing to help send the bob and tom show your story i bet you will be surprise with the out come good luck god bless

Hi there T.. I hope this suggestion helps you. My sister in law had this same problem last year. And he went to her bank and put the kids on a wish tree. A family picked them off and bought her kids toys and clothes and took them to her house a few days before christmas. There are so many people out there who want to help but arent sure how. I would see if your bank has one of those trees and if they dont call around to other banks and stores. Someone is bound to have one. I hope this helps you a little bit.

I don't know if you belong to a church or not, but they often have programs for families who need a little help during the Christmas season. I'm honestly wondering where your ex-husband is in this situation...although he may have paid the child-support already, there's no reason why he can't spend the money to buy a gift or 2 for your children...I'd ask him to plan something. Or if you feel your kids are adult enough, tell them that Santa has too many kids to visit on Christmas and ask them if they wouldn't mind waiting until the New Year when he has some extra time...have them send a letter in the mail~ One year I went to a toy drive at K-mart...you might be able to get some information there or at the WIC office. Good luck~

Have you asked a church to help you out with gifts this year. or maybe you can try your city offices, they may be able to give you some resources to call for help. That is what I did this year. do you have any family memebers you can ask to help. Even if it is just one present from santa, it would be helpful. Hope this helps

I don't have a perfect response for you....I wish I did. While you want your kids to stay kids as long as you can - they are old enough to have converstations about the bad economy and how it is affecting people everywhere (including Santa). If you can get help from any organization or family - that's a great idea. You might also be able to find something affordable for each child at a local Salvation Army or Goodwill store - they do have some really nice things if you look (I buy my clothes there). Also, if you can come up with a 'family Santa' gift that is activities or a craft project that you can all work on together, that might be good also. Or, if you are crafty or handy - create something special for each of them (I sew, and I make my children something every year. For the material, you can salvage outgrown or outdated items. Cut them apart and make it into something new. I've used one of my old sweaters to make a vest for my son, with a matching hat. IF you don't sew, or arn't handy to make a wood project, or just aren't crafty - maybe write them a special Christmas book) After all, Christmas is all about family, love and time spent together - the gifts are a bonus. Good luck.

I wish I had a perfect solution for you , but I dont. Others have offered great advice however, and I think if you just ask, people will come through. The toy swap is a great idea, and if you contacted your childrens teacher at school maybe she/he could set up a class room swap and then the children would get something 'new' to them? Good luck to you all and I really hope things work out. - K.

I would call your mortgage company and see if they can work something out with you. Sometimes you may get lucky with that idea if you are a good on time paying customer. If not then I agree with the women who said pay the late fee and give the kids a christmas. I would not tell them there is no santa clause, it is a sad day for all kids once they find that out. If you do want to tell them there is no santa then wait until a few months after christmas, you tell them this close to christmas alls they will do is cry and make the holiday miserable for them and you.