my daughter had been totaly potty trained twice now. She had some medical issues before that caused the last issue with peeing in pants and such. Got that all taken care of and she is no longer on the meds for that. We recently had no choice ut to move and so now we are in a new place and such and she has started peeing in her bed and pants daily. I am not sure if it is due to the move or if it is due to the medical issues comming back. I plan to bring her into the doctor again in our new area but also am wondering what I can do to help her if it is due to the move. I have tried telling her that it is ok but that she needs to try harder next time. I have also tried time outs and having her take her dirty bedding off and making the bed again with clean bedding. I have even had her put her dirty stuff in the washer and take it out and put it in the dryer but nothng is working. It seems like she can feel that she has to go but refuses to go to the bathroom. She will actually go and find a spot where wshe can't be seen and pee on the floor or in a chair and such as that. I am not sure what else to do.. I feel that if it was the medical issues comming back she would be in pain like she was last time with infections and such but she isn't unless she doesn't tell me that she has peed and I don't realize it right away then she gets kinda red and sore but no pain when urinating or anything like that which was one of the things that happened with the medical issue. Any suggestions would be very helpful as we have been moved for almost a month now. Thank you in advance.
ok... there have been several people who have suggested that she may be being sexually abused.. I wanted to let everyone know that I had thought about it and the person that I thought that about does not see her and has not seen her since may or early june and she had been having some issues with it then and we got it all under control.. the medical problems that I had talked about where reacurring UTI's and I did take her to the doctor many times and even a urologist and it was due to an abnormality in her urithera causing her to go with so much pressure that it was causing some of the urine to go back up into her bladder and kiddneys. She had been treated with meds and such and it seemed to be under control so the doctors wanted to see how she did without meds for a lil while and am wondering if she is having the issue now that she isn't on the meds at this time.. if so then she will have to have surgery to correct the abnormality. this is why the doctor wanted her on meds to keep her from getting UTI's and give things a chance to fix themselves.
It sounds like a mess dear. However, if she is feeling the anxiety around you and your situation she is responding. Kids are like little t.v. antennae, they pick up what is going around them feeling wise. So, just relax with her, tell her its ok, and smile next time, don't scold. She will stop when the situation (on your end) gets better. Give her a big hug!
A.,
Does she go to the same spot to pee every time? If so try a potty chair again. Her old one if you used one would be best, it would remind her that even though you are in a new place, it is home and she can be safe there. If not, get a routine, have her go potty every hour to hour and a half and sit in there for like 5 minutes. It's not too long and if she has to pee, she won't be able to hold it for that long if she is sitting on the potty.
Also, only my first bladder infection hurt. Now I don't know until it is so bad that I am doubled over in pain and it usually takes 2 treatments of antibiotics to get rid of it. The last one resulted in me getting a CAT scan of my kidneys to make sure it wasn't stones. If we had only known that it was an UTI things would have been much less painful and expensive.
When you take her to the doctor, they will be able to give you some things to try. If she was a boy I would suggest the cheerio in the toilet, but us girls don't have anything like that...
When we moved, my daughter started acting out, being mouthy and naughty, and she was 8. I took her to counseling a few times and found out she just didn't know how to express how she was feeling. Maybe she is afraid of something in the new bathroom? If she won't go to the bathroom, bring it to her, for a while.
Good Luck!
H.
ps. I just thought of this, I read your responses after I posted this. Do you give her bubble baths? Those can cause yeast infections and UTI's in little girls. She may be allergic to bubbles. My cousin had one or the other for 2 years before everyone (doctors included) realized it was the bubbles in her bath water.
Maybe she is afraid of the new bathroom. I remember as a child, I was afraid of our new house. The hallways were longer and darker, the bedrooms were darker, and the toilets were louder! I would use the bathroom but run really fast to get out the room. The toilet would actually make me anxious. Just a thought. :)
Hello,
I am not sure how old your daughter is but I know that when kids feel or stress or are around it that they deal with it different then adults do. With our middle daughter she was potty trained then went back to wetting so we went and got her good nights and told her that they were for big girls and she could wear them under her cloths so that if she had an "accedent" she would not get it all over. She went for that and she didn't like feeling wet so she re potty trained. She is now almost 7 and she wears them at night because she still has problems some nights. Good luck to you.
T.
Maybe you should have your daughter checked again for the medical problem. You stated that you're going through a divorce where there was violence. Maybe this is causing your daughter to have set backs. I'm not sure of your daughter's age, but divorce is h*** o* kids as well. I would definately have her checked medically again, because there could be something going on with her kidneys or her bladder.
It sounds like the two of you have been through a lot. I think you are doing the right things - taking her to the doctor (to rule out any recurring problem), remaining calm and unaffected -even though you are thoroughly frustrated :) - having her help with clean up, and reminding her to go often. I heard that kids will often regress with potty training because it is one thing they have complete control over. I had 2 siblings who wet the bed until they were 6 or 7. I don't think kids can help that at all. I was up last night with my daughter changing her sheets at 1 a.m. because she wet the bed. Oh the joys of parenting! You could try a reward system...I have used it for a few things we were struggling with and it really worked. Maybe a sticker or a star or smiley face on a paper for every dry day or night - 3 smiley faces and she gets some reward - stay up late, a coloring book, etc. That may help too if she's feeling she needs a bit more attention. Good Luck!!
