5 Yr New to Wetting Bed

C.,

I would check with your doctor about a bladder infection first. Rule that out before you go on. If it's a bladder infection, than obviously all the positive and negative reinforcement isn't going to help the situation, but antibiotics will! Is she drinking plenty of fluids (could be why her urine is smelly).

If a bladder infection is not the issue, has there been any changes (started school, new babysitter, "scary" movie she watched, for example) that would cause anxiety? Is something bothering her - any fears? Even something that might be viewed as a positive (new friend, new activity) could be anxiety provoking. If you can't pinpoint anything stressful and she can't articulate anything bothering her then I would use some positive reinforcement. Start to reward her (stickers, small candy - doesn't have to be big - one M & M or skittle kind of reward) for using the bathroom during the day and encourage her with rewards for staying dry at night. The attention to it might be enough. Maybe talk about a fun sleep idea (my son loves to sleep in his little tent inside the house), but that she can't do this fun idea if she's wetting the bed.

I would imagine the hard part is that she was doing fine and now she's regressed. That's got to be frustrating. Any chance that she is regressing because your other daughter is being potty trained and maybe she's getting more attention for going to the bathroom? The reward system might help this if that's the case.

If she's wetting every night - I'd use pull ups at night to help cut back on the laundry. I couldn't keep up with that kind of laundry!!

Best of luck...

1 mom found this helpful

C., First and foremost STOP punishing your daughter, that will only make the matter worse. I have dealt with a very similar situation with my sister growing up and my grandmother would punish her just to make the matter a lot worse emotionally and physically. Has your daughter had a growth spurt recently? If she has it is I would say part of the cause, as children grow their outsides grow faster than the inside and with more liquid intake a child's bladder cannot hold it and especially when sleeping. This is what my sister's doctor had told my parents. Take her to her doctor and discuss the situation. She probably feels absolutely horrible and she doesn't understand what her body is doing. At night reduce the liquid intake and make the last large drink at dinner, with just a sip of water before bed. Also wake her up and take her to the bathroom in the night I used to do that with my sister, we shared the bed and I didn't want to get up to change sheets. As for the laziness in the bathroom, has there been extreme changes in the house, I see you have a new baby congrats but how is she dealing with that and did school start for her. Ask yourself and your husband if either of you have noticed a behavior change. No child wants to wet the bed and as a family you guys need to work with her in finding the answer. Tell her she will not be punished anymore and you and Daddy are going to get to the bottom of this, giving her a little reassurance and that will go along way. I hope this helps you and everything goes well.

1 mom found this helpful

I am not an expert, however, as soon as I read that you were potty training another child, my FIRST thought was that the older child has regressed because she sees the "attention" and "time" you are showering on the younger, potty training age child.

I would try spending extra time with the 5 year old during this period of potty training, talking with her, making ALOT of positive reinforcement comments about how you enjoyed her as a baby but you are so glad she is more grown up and can do so many more things that you couldn't do together when she was younger. Be creative about it and every time you are doing ANYTHING that she could not do with you as a baby EMPHASIZE that with her in conversation.

Again, I am not an expert, but just from what you mentioned in your post, it sounds like she has regressed because she sees the extra time and attention you have to put forth with the potting training.

That being said, if her urine has a foul or unusual odor, make sure she is drinking plenty of water and try to get her to drink some cranberry juice (probably cranapple or cut it with water to dilute the strong taste she may not like). Cranberry juice REALLY helps with bladder infections as it does not allow the bacteria to attach itself to the lining or walls of the bladder.

I would seriously consider taking her to her pediatrition
and advise them of both her regressive behaviour and the smelly odor of her urine. You def. don't want to take any chances that it may be some serious internally and put off getting it checked out.

Also, make sure you know the difference between whether the fresh urine has an odor, OR, is it urine in the mattress that ha been there for a while and possibly combined with other already existing basteria in the mattress that is causing the odor. Just a thought!

Good luck with this! - S.

1 mom found this helpful

Please do not be angry with her. Ask her if she is angry or sad about an issue.
Also have you asked your pediatrician about this? Could be a bladder infection?
Good luck

Hello C.,

Please Stop punish her too much it cause her emotional increase, she might scare to tell you or can not explain to you something wrong with her. sometime,kids can not communicate how they feel. something cause her under sress or bother something like scary movie, friends reject her, happen at school, day care or in family situation, etc... take her to pediatrician,check for URI(Urinary tract infections) or bladder infection these can cause smelly and painful to urine, if it come out positive result. pediatrician will give her some antibodies, it will reduce wet bedding. Girls get URI very common cause not enough clean up and not wipe.If it come out negative result. I suggest, you do not give her drink after 6 PM and make sure she goes bathroom before she goes bed time. Make sure,give her a plenty of fluid during a daytime. Give her plenty of support and love, she will be ok.

good luck,
D.

I would definately stop punishing her and be on her side to work together to help her. No kid WANTS to wake up in a bed of disgusting cold pee, knowing they are about to get into big trouble and lose priveledges. It sounds as though she is struggling with something.... Maybe the new sibling? The other sibling potty training? School? Any other changes in the routine or family?? Try to be understanding....kids don't handle change the same logical way that adults do and often can stress out. Their stress symptoms show up in behavioral changes, regression, sickness... I would def get her checked at the ped. and if there isn't a medical condition, treat it as an emotional one and be by her side through her stress and development. Maybe she needs more one on one time with either mommy or daddy?? Every kid is different and each have different needs, even sometimes more than WE think they should. Be there for her and when her security and comfort improve, most likely so will her wetting....

I wouldn't punish her....it is probably something she can't help. My daughter is 7 and still has night time accidents. It upsets her, she is such a hard sleeper she doesn't wake up. I let her know she will grow out of it and make her feel like it is not that big of a deal. I know it's a bit different situation because your daughter just started doing it....having her help change the sheets is fine in my opinion but punishing her by taking away toys or putting her in timeout may not help the situation. Good luck :) hopefully for your daughter it is just a phase and due to some type of stress and will disappear as quickly as it started. I agree to take her to the Dr to rule out any type of infection.

i believe she could be emotionally upset over something.and the reason she cant quit she dont know the problem.there is a problem.what i dont know a doctor would help.a specialist.i wouldnt classify her as lazy.i believe she just dont know herself how to deal with the situation.i wouldnt be hard on her.i would be looking to the why we can be to rash sometimes without realizing it.get your baby help.what she needs lots of luck and love C.

This may sound strange. Has she had a cough lately? When my daughter gets the asthma cough she wets the bed. There is a link between asthmatic symptoms and bedwetting and I don't understand why. Keep in mind they can be wheezing and it's undectable to us. You can hear the cough though. Once I treat the asthma with some nebulizer treatments the bedwettinf subsides.

Hi. If I were you I would take her to the pediatrician to make sure its not an infection. If that is ruled out, I would look at possible stress in her life. When kids back slide with something like this, its usually because something stressful is going on. Maybe the new brother in the house? How is she acting at bath time? Any unusual behavior regarding her privates? I definitely think she is trying to tell you something with her change in behavior.
At the very least, restrict her fluid intake in the evenings so the nighttime mess won't be as bad (until you figure out what's going on). Its so frustrating when our kids act out of character for no apparent reason. Good luck.

Your daughter needs to be seen by a physician ASAP.
Frequent urination is many times indicative of diabetes.
If no medical reasons are present. It could be she is feeling some stress.

Sometimes children can act up if they have been exposed to highly sexual content in adult films. Or the wrong kind of
people helping you during this time of adjustment.
Not trying to alarm you but this is something to think about. Read up on it.

Perhaps her new baby brother is getting more of your attention than she feels comfortable with... Caution I did not say he was getting to much attention just that she may think he is.

Hopefully this helps you.
P. G.

I think, I don't KNOW, but I think you answered your own question. If you are potty training your 2yo, perhaps it is just plain jelousy of your time between the newborn and the 2yo. Be calm, tell her you are on her side and will work with her, like a team, to get her back on track. Don't punish any more, as it probably will not make it better anyway. Try to set aside some time each week to be just you and her, or 20 minutes every day. I know its hard to do, so dont think Im saying that easily. I have only a 3yo and 1yo and it sometimes seems impossible. But, when I devote the time to the 3yo alone, it usually clears up any issues, especially the potty ones. Good luck, C., hang in there. Im sure its a phase and will pass soon.

C. I tryed everything you have tried and it seems to make the matter worse. I would put a plastic sheet over mattress and try her in pull-up for sleeping. she will grow out of it. limit drinks after 5pm and try to wake her around 8 or 9pm to go potty.

I was a later childhood bed-wetter. What my parents did that helped was they'd have me pee right before bed, and then when they went to bed they'd have me pee again. It helped a lot. Seems like a pain, but easier than washing sheets every day...
Is she new to school and maybe wishes she was a baby again?

If you haven't taken her to the doctor yet to rule out all possible medical conditions I would do that first. If there is nothing physically wrong then there may be something affecting her mentally/emotionally that is manifesting itself through her bed wetting. Finally, if that is not the case then her bladder may need to be retrained which means taking her to the bathroom every half hour and slowly increasing the amount of time b/t visits to the potty until her bladder has recognized how much it can hold again. Good luck.

1st Get her a complete physical- problems with body ph- that is acid base balance can cause the bladder muscles to relax at night- then she urinaltes involuntaraly- and then if this is the case- you have punished her for something she couldn't control- and then you are "off to the races"-with behavior from being punished for what she couldn't help- get the physical done- then check out Yoka Reader on the internet to fix the behavior- Reader is amazing- regards-
Dr. McCullen

To me this signals trouble - and not behavioral on your daughters part. Get her to her pediatrician for a checkup and share your concerns. Also, look for signs of trouble - when did this start, who was she around at that time, has there been repeated exposures to this person/people, who has access to your daughter? You can never be too careful with your little ones. Best case scenario - she is going through a stage that will pass or it is behavioral. The pediatrician should have some insight. Good luck.

yes, it might be a bladder infection....you need to take her to the doctor so they can check for that. They will have her pee in a cup so make sure she doesn't go potty before the appointment so that she is able to pee in the doctors office and get some in a cup so they can test for infection. Please do it soon because this can lead to more serious things if it is not treated. And write back to me if it's not an infection, and I will give you some more ideas.

Get her tested for bladder infection, it can move into kidneys. I'd get her to the pediatritian asap.

See what is going on with her emotionally... bed wetting often relates to a child being pissed off with a parental authority figure who seems too overbearing to the child and makes the child feel insecure. Have there been any changes in family dynamics fostered by the new baby? Something is likely upsetting your daughter and she hasn't been able to express it consciously and may not realize that she's doing it unconsciously through her peeing. The attempts at discipline are possibly aggravating her issue so I encourage you to look at it as an emotional issue rather than a behavior to be conditioned - she already previously learned toilet training so behavioral conditioning isn't the root of this challenge.

Hi,C.. Sweeetie,it's not your daughter's fault! She's doing this in her sleep. She has no control over it. Do not punish her just because it's a pain in the neck for you to clean up after her.

Yes, no doubt there is a medical reason for her problem. If she has pee that is very smelly, it probably means she has an infection or something is going wrong with her kidneys. Please get her checked out ASAP.

If there is nothing wrong physically with her bladder or kidneys, sometimes children wet the bed and regress even during the daytime if there has been something upsetting in their lives.

I see in your signature that you have a new baby boy. This can cause a child to go back to baby behaviors because she misses being the baby of the family. DON'T PUNISH HER FOR IT. Punishment will only make it worse.

If you first find out that she doesn't have any illness that makes her wet herself, then try putting her in those PullUps things for a little while. That alone might make her want to stop doing it. At the very least, she will stop wetting her clothes during the daytime. You might have to wake her up during the night for a while to get her to either change the PullUp or get up to go to the toilet. I know this is extremely inconvenient, but you might try doing this at a time when you are already up for the new baby -- that way you don't have to wake up twice. Wake her up at regular intervals to pee.

Sometimes children sleep so deeply that they can't wake up to normal bladder signals. She probably has different sleeping patterns and activity patterns now that the new baby is here...not to mention that she has been displaced TWICE, once by her sister and now by her brother. So help her adjust -- don't make her feel even more like a stranger by punishing her and shaming her.

Also, make sure that she gets some good attention. Right now, she's getting negative attention for the peeing problem, and that may be most of the attention she's getting. Make sure she gets positive attention for all the right reasons, and as little negative attention as possible. Make sure she has no reason to feel invisible or replaced by the new baby or any other creature on the planet.

I hope everything works out wonderfully for the whole family.

Peace,
Syl

My 9 year old all of a sudden started wetting the bed 2 months ago. We had to changed the sheets several times a night. This ended up being a symptom of Juvenille Diabetes. Other symptoms are drinking a lot and eating a lot. I thought it was an odd thing to happen, but he ended up in the hospital with a high blood sugar. Of course that doesn't mean this is her problem, but I would take her to the doctor to make sure. Good Luck

It appears that this is your oldest child. The middle child is getting potty trained and there is a new baby in the house. A lot of attention is directed toward the other two children and maybe your 5 year old is resenting the other two children getting so much attention.

Find a way to give her more attention:
1) Make her Mom's big helper and she can help bathe the baby
2) Help the two-year old with small task
3) As "Mom's Big Girl" give her special recognition for ding a good job
4) As a Kindergartener, she can be told that she needs to help teach her siblings and be an example for them
5) Since she is the "Big Girl" give her special privileges ... something JUST FOR HER
6) Buy a gift for her .. and tell her it's from her baby brother or baby sister
Note: I heard of a case when a new baby was born, he parents bought gifts and gave it to the first born before they left the hospital as a gift from your new baby sister or brother. The child felt excited about the baby sending him/her gifts before even seeing them.

God bless you and good luck. Read to the children and let the oldest hold the book and turn the pages.

J. Henry Orlando Florida

my 5year old was doing that for a little while and come to find out it was a urinary tract infection once she was on the medicine for the 10 days we hadnt had a bed wet since and i had taken her to her Dr and they said it was a faze. I had her at pirates and princess and local playhouse for children when she almost passed out and was caught by sweats that were out of this world. OFF to the ER we went and after a simple pee test that's what we found.

It could be a bladder infection I will talk to your doctor. My daughter became afraid of the bathroom because of an ad for a scary movie it took 2 months for her to tell me why. You just never know. ...

Is she eating anything new? Or just more of something that she wasn't having very much of before? Sometimes food intolerance can cause bladder control issues and strange smelling pee.

Kids don't start wetting the bed because they're lazy and I'm sure she doesn't know why it happens. My son started wetting the bed when he was five. We had him checked out medically but all was fine. We noticed it happened on the days he was really busy or otherwise stressed out. We were having a lot of changes in our lives at the time. We started getting him up to the bathroom before we went to bed and didn't have any more problems.

Wow, sorry you're having such a hard time. You say nothing has happened. You say she's 5 - did she just start kindergarten? I think you're being a bit harsh punishing her for this - that will not help improve the situation; she's probably not peeing in her bed on purpose. There must be an underlying reason. I would call the doctor and to check and see if she has some sort of infection. Try and be sympathetic, not upset - remember, when kids want attention they'll take even negative attention so punishing could make the bad behavior continue...this may not help any but just the thoughts that came to me as I read your post. Good luck.