Broke My Heart

Updated on July 17, 2007
N.H. asks from Pauline, SC
5 answers

I start work next week - so I decided to let my 11 month old daughter get familiar with day care this week for a couple of hours each day. Yesterday she was only there for 2 hours - the workers said she played for about 45 minutes and cried the rest of the time.
Yes, she has been home with me for the last 11 months. I feel so guilty leaving her now - The good thing - she will only be there for 6 hours a day.
I need some advice - having a hard time with this.

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So What Happened?

Well, today she did better. However, she only took a 1 hour nap (in the swing)! When she is home with me she loves her crib and goes right to sleep - she takes about three 1 hour naps a day.
I left her there for 4 hours this time - when I picked her up she was crying - but the workers said she had just started.
Thanks for the support. I'm having a real rough time with this (it doesn't help that I'm PMSing too).

More Answers

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S.L.

answers from Augusta on

N.,
I have worked in Daycares since I was about 15. I am now a 4th grade teacher. I believe your daughter will get used to it. It will take some time- but she will make it through. It sounds like a good daycare- in that they are not lying to you- saying she did great and she really didn't. Your daughter is just used to being with you and that is a big change. Once she gets used to the workers and the other children she will do just fine. Good luck and I know it is hard.

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S.L.

answers from Spartanburg on

You're doing the right thing by easing her into daycare. Something to think about is that she doesn't have any friends at home to play with. There, she will learn to socialize with others.

She may cry to begin with. My daughter did. Just remember that you are doing the right thing. She will be ok. You have very honest daycare workers. I know many that would've told you that she did fine the whole time she was there.

She will be ok. Remember that. You have to trust them or else she will pick up on that and not trust them as well.

Good luck!

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D.R.

answers from Atlanta on

Hey N.! I know it is very hard for ya! Heck, i worked at the daycare that my kids went to and it was still hard for me..but i promise you, just from working at a daycare and experiencing what you are going through..IT WILL GET BETTER..
it takes some kids a little longer, but in the end she'll stop the cryin'..
and i have to agree with one of the others about your child's teacher telling you that she cried b/c i also know of some telling parents that they are doing fine when really and truely their ballin' their eyes out the majority of the day!
sounds like you've got a good daycare!
just be strong for your baby and everything will eventually get better!

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C.C.

answers from Spartanburg on

I know what you mean. Daycare can be hard. I have a home day care and I try to make the transition as easy for the children as the parent. Just make sure you have a good daycare. Home daycares are better than public because they get more one on one attention. E-mail me if you need to talk. C. c.

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S.E.

answers from Savannah on

Oh, it's so tough, I know. I stayed home with my daughter for 6-7 months before putting her in 2 different home daycares over the next 1.5 years. She loved both of them, but at 2 yrs., her home care stopped and I had to put her in a daycare center. We left her crying many mornings those first 2 weeks. I'll never forget the look in her eyes one morning when she layed on the floor with her blanket looking up at me with tears in her eyes. She was trying to be so strong. She's now 3 and although I still feel guilty when I think about that look she gave me that one morning, so much of who she is, is a direct result of her routine at daycare and the other children she plays with. She's such a sweetheart! She loves her "school" and looks forward to it every day. You are fortunate that you only have to leave her 6 hours/day. I'm also 35 and have an 8 month old son as well who goes to the same daycare. I'm nervous about him going through the same separation anxiety when he reaches that age, but having been through it once before, I know it will work out and my husband and I will just cry ourselves to work for a few weeks. I did call the daycare center several times each day. They welcomed it (as all daycares should) and would give me a report on what my daughter was doing, which helped greatly. You're not alone in this!

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