Bed Wetting Advice

Hi M.!

I am the mother of two boys, now 11 and 5. My 11 yr old seemed to wet the bed forever, and I put so much energy into trying to get him to stop wetting the bed. This frustration made it very difficult for both my son and myself...emotionally.

I learned that it's very normal for boys to have this trouble, just as your Pediatrician told you. And the more "frustrated" I got about changing sheets, the worse it was for my son, and he would continue to wet the bed. It wasn't until I finally relaxed about the whole issue, and he soon stopped wetting the bed. He just needed the chance for his bladder to grow more, and for his mom to stop making him "nervous" about it. As I'm writing this, I look back and feel "terrible" about showing my anger in front of him. Thank Goodness I was able to pull myself together.....for his sake.

The bed wetting WILL stop....when he and his body are ready. He is at an age where he is SOOO aware that this isn't "right", and already feels bad about it happening. He really doesn't need you to make him feel worse about it. Please try to be more patient with the issue. By bringing MORE attention to it, you're are actually making matters worse.

Please know that I say this with a loving heart, and without any sarcasm. I feel your frustration...I really do. But don't let him feel it :o)

N.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi M. my son is turning 7 this year and i had a problem with bed wetting. i used to reward him with gift or specal meal or a fun weekend. or i would give him money my son loves money if he woke up with a dry bed it takes some time but he will get it you just have to be patient thank you

Hi M.,

I have had similar problems with my son also. He will be 8 in August. What I have done is limited his consumption of liquids after 6pm (which wasn't easy...ever since he was a baby - he has been a heavy water drinker...I gave him water instead of juice)...anyway - in addition to limiting his liquids - I have him use the restroom approximately 1/2 hour before bedtime...then again right before we say our prayers.

He has only had 2 accidents in the past year. I am never angry with him when this happens eventhough he always feels bad after it happens, I always tell him "accidents will happen" and he helps me clean his mattress and put new sheets on the bed.

If he is overly tired from school or playing sports - I ask him to use the restroom one hour ahead, then 1/2 hour and again at bedtime. This has worked out well for us...

Good Luck!
~G. R.

Call the Enuresis Treatment Center at 248-785-119 or go to nobedwetting.com. They have lots of information. You do use the alarm. They consider this a sleep disorder and the kids get into a deep sleep and their brain is so asleep that it does not wake them so it is up to us to wake them when the horrible alarm goes off and really get them awake. Sometimes they fight, or whatever but you give them a code word after you have asked questions and see if they know it in the morning. Call me if you want at 408- ###-###-####.

Hi, M.,
I am currently going through this with my son that just turned 7 two weeks ago. He hasn't had a dry night except once, and each of his Good Nites are completely full and wet each morning. I am not making a big deal out of this as he has other "issues" to work on (wearing a patch for his eye, getting braces, etc.), plus he has 3 other brothers who make pick on him. My pediatrician also says he will grow out of this in time. I just keep waiting.
Hang in there. You're not alone.

Does he wet the bed every night? My son just turned 8 and he still wets the bed. Granted its not every night...just occasionally. We've come to the conclusion that it's hereditary and there is medical facts that say it is.

Just don't put a lot of pressure on him...he'll out grow it.

M.,
My son is also almost 7 and wets the bed a few nights a week. His wetting seems to be more connected with visitations with his father. His older brother wets the bed also and has been put on medication to stop. I find that on the nights he wets he strips off his wet clothes and washes up real quick in the bathroom, he has a bunk bed so he just crawls into the other bed and goes back to sleep. I got some waterproof mattress pads at Ikea, they are rubberized with a terry cloth like top, they don't make any noise and they don't make you sweat. They work great. I don't yell at him for wetting, but on the other hand the nights he doesn't wet the bed I praise him and give him big hugs. His father wet the bed until he was a teenager and my brother wet the bed for years so I think it's just something he'll have to grow out of.

Have you checked to see if his bladder is small? Some children inherit this. Of course you have tried the less liquids before bed time. I have heard that Chiropractic can help if his spine is pinching the nerves to this area. It can effect many functions of the body when the spine is mis aligned. I remember a movie one time with Michael Landon playing in it about a bed wetter ( the loneliest runner). He was a 14 yr old kid and would skip riding the bus to run home to take down the stained sheet his Mom would display to the neighbors every day and ended up being an Olympic long distance runner. He slept one night in a store and slept on a brand new bed and somehow he found he didn't wet the bed. For some reason the pride of the new bed kept him from soiling it. Maybe new clothing, new bedding and/or bed, could give him pride and he would be more careful. I also think we should not demean our children and chide them into conforming. How would you feel if you did find out that he had a terribly small bladder and it was not his fault. Also some children just sleep very hard and cannot wake themselves up. Good luck. elaine mother of 6

my brother who is now 11 had the same problem, n didnt grow out of it tell he was about 8 or 9 also my other brother had the same problem too it sometimes runs in the family. just give him pull ups during the night, they have special night time ones. he'll get better at controlling it as he gets older. just continue to help him like you are...potty before bed..mabey cut down on drinks before bed, n reashure him, as im shure u have, that it's not his fault & you love him.. your friend Paua..R....

Get a child sized sleeping bag. That way you only have to wash the sleeping bag, not the whole bed.
Sorry to tell you, my husband and his brother wet the bed until they were around 9. Actually, that was the magic age for one of the boys that I nanny for as well.
There's not much you can do about it. Hang in there, and don't worry, he won't be doing this when he's an adult ;)

I had the same problem with my son. We also tried everything. He wore Goodnights every night when he went to bed. Our pediatrician told us this is a hereditary condition - two of his uncles were bed wetters. Our son eventually outgrew this problem - around age nine. Don't make a big deal out of it. The chiropractor adjustment looks interesting - try to find out a little bit more about it. Just remember there are thousands and thousand of kids (and parents) going through this - you are not alone! Good luck!!
T.

Hi M.. I didn't look to see if you had any other responses, but I thought I'd share what I know.
My girlfriend has a daughter that had the same issues, she took her to a urologist (sp?) and found that she had an underdeveloped bladder and it really wasn't her fault and it was something she had to literally grow out of. That was after two peditricians said it was "normal", she was fine.
I also have a foster sister who wet her bed well into her teens just because she slept so heavy and my mom simply bought her Goodnights.
There are so many different reasons he's wetting the bed. I know how frustrating it must be. It's frustrating for me when my three year old wakes up in a wet bed. We started making him go potty before he goes to bed and as soon as he gets up.
The Chiropractor could be a place to start. It's amazing the things a spinal adjustment can fix.
Good luck.

Hi M.

I think it is fine too. My son still occasionally wets the bed and he is 8. When he was 6 and 7 it was more often. I read in a parenting book that it is best not to make a fuss, just simply wash the sheets and blankets, pj's etc. and put them back without saying anything! I use a waterproof cover on his mattress to make the job of cleaning up easier. As he gets older it should get less frequent. Also, I make my son go to the bathroom just before lights out because he does drink a lot of water!

M.

I haven't had any experience with chiropractic and bedwetting, but I have had it cure a diarhea situation. You can always call an office and ask if they have ever cured a bedwetter.

I was a bedwetter, I would either be afraid to get up (the monsters were out there waiting) or I couldn't get fully woke up, and more that a few times I actually dreamed I was sitting on the toilet, only to wake up to the warm wetness of my bed.

You need to let go of the pressure to "fix" him, and realize that your son will outgrow this in his time. I don't wet the bed anymore. My daughter was also a bedwetter and was cured, I believe in her junior high years. Have several sets of sheets, and a waterproof mattress cover, and just let his body set the pace. You don't want to stress him out, or make him feel bad for something he can't help. I know its a pain to have all the extra laundry, but hopefully you have your own washer and dryer and don't have to go to the laundramat. I'm sure you're already limiting drinks after a certain hour. Does he drink sodas or tea? Certain things go through me faster than others.

I hope this is helpful to you.
D.

M., My older daughter who is now 13 had a similar problem. She grew out of it but when it was occuring we kind of tricked her. We took the generic pull ups and called them "special underware" for bigger kids. She wore them to bed. I also found other parents were very tolerent at sleep overs. Good luck. I really think not making a big deal out of it is b est. My brother also had a similar issue.

M. R.

Hi M.,

We too had that probelm, and as soon as we added vitamins the bed wetting stopped in a couple of weeks. I also have autistic son, and as soon as we added B6 to his vitamin regimin he also stopped wetting his pants. So of our children do not process and get enough vitamins from their food, so they need a little extra. The multi did not do it for the autistic child , but did for the others.

God bless, hope this helps,
D.

My nephew, who is ten, still has problems with wetting the bed. His problem is constipation though. He gets so constipated on a regular basis, that it has put pressure on his bladder. Apparently your colon can get very stretched out from frequent constipation. Anyways, on days when he is able to empty his bowels, he doesn't usually have any problems. Days when he hasn't, he is almost guaranteed to have an accident. His doctor said they can give him medication to try to repair the damage (but he will basically be on a laxative for two weeks straight) and his parents don't want to do that to him at this point. They just let him wear good nights when he wants to, and don't make a big deal about it. Now that he is older, he is responsible for changing his sheets etc when he does have an accident. His dad was a bed wetter, and they told them this type of thing often runs in families. I would have your doctor check to make sure there is no medical explanation. If there is not, there really isn't much you can do. I know they still limit is fluid intake after dinner and try to wake him to pee before they go to bed at night, so he has less time in between night and morning. I know it is really hard on his self-esteem, so they have gotten him involved in soccer, which he is really good at, to help boost that back up. The hardest part is he doesn't want to go on any sleepovers or anything because he doesn't want his friends to find out. I know my sister was feeling the same way, but when she realized it wasn't his fault, that there was actually a medical condition, it made it a lot easier for her to accept and not get so upset about it. Good luck and lots of patience to you.

My 14 year old went through this. He wet the bed until he was about 9 years old.
I used to limit his liquid intake about two hours before bed. Then every night, (i know its not easy)I would wake up mid way through the night and get him up to use the bathroom. This almost eliminated the accidents at night. I did not make a big deal about it if he did have an accident. We would just clean up and go back to bed. I know he hated it and I didn't want to make him feel worse. I made it a very non-issue with him and everyone (if they even knew).

I feel that his bladder didn't quite catch up to him as he grew so thats why it was continuing to happen. He doesn't have the issue anymore and I'm sure that your son will grow out of it too.

I hope this helps a little. Good luck to you all

I have a nearly 9 yr old boy with the same situation. We have tried a chiropractor, which can work for some people. I guess there are a variety of reasons that some (mostly boys) develop the ability to stay dry later. For some people a couple adjustments makes a difference--not so for us. For others there is a low grade infection, which we ruled out with a urine test and also measuring daily urine ph. I guess many kids react to a dairy allergy this way too. But for my son it's just that an area of the right brain isn't quite developed enough yet to have that control. I have had lots of reassurance that he'll grow out of it and it's within the range of normal. One thing he can try is kegel exercises to strengthen the muscles--stopping the flow of urine several times each time he pees during the day. Another is doing physically challenging things with the left side of his body, which will stimulate the right brain. Good luck, and be patient!

My 6 year old has the same problem. For a while we used "good nights" but it seemed like he was getting lazy. The doctor said to watch it and he could give him some medication but we haven't taken that route yet. I think their bladder is not growing as fast as them and he was more tired after starting first grade so he didn't wake up. I remember having issues around his age too so I'm sure he'll out grow it....I hope.

Good luck

Hello My name is Dymond. Bed wetting does become a problem but
sometimes it just might take the brain and body to caught up with each other. Coaching patients I would wake my child up during the night to use the tollets. I had also notice when she was restless in the middle of the night I would take her to the restroom and turn the water on a bit and wait for her to use it. Until she decided that she did not want me to distrube her sleep. I also made her responsible for cleaning her own linen. I had to rememeber when I was her age to what made me contiune to bed wet either I was scared to wake up our I was dreaming of me using the restroom I had a problem of waiting to long, and to confortable sleeping to move I know this, it takes time and love to revert the situation especially if the doctor says its normal. This will pass.

My son had a terrible time with bed wetting. I tried everything as well. Buzzers, no water after 7, I even took him to a specialist with no resolve. It continued until about 12. At that age we discovered that my son was depressed. (very common among pre-teens.) Took him to another specialist who diagnosed and prescribed well-butrin. He quit wetting the bed immediatly. I'm not saying you should take these steps now at age 7...but something to keep in mind if it continues. They will out grow it. My pediatrician at the time told me not to worry....she had 16 year old patients with bedwetting problems. My son is 15 and if he skips his medicine for too many days he has been known to still wet the bed. Overall my son has become an extremely confident young man. Good luck.

Hey M. B,
I am using the alarm now and you are right, it is very loud. However, did you read where they said in the paperwork that if it is too loud, you can tape over the alarm to cut down on the volume? We did that and my son is able to tolerate it better. It can be scary at first but the fact is, if the alarm is not loud enough, they won't wake up. Try taping and see if you can tolerate it better. I am feeling you. We have not made it through 5 days straight yet. He is now on the 3rd go around, and up to 3 days w/o wetting. My 7 year old took himself off after about 4 nights of success. I did not think he was ready but I was trying not to push. Well, it did not last so he is now convinced he has to keep going for the 30 days. D.

My son wet the bed untill he was about ten. We didn't make a big deal about it and he just changed the sheets in the morning, we did use water proof cribpads on his mattress. He eventually just stoped. Lots of kids esspecially boys wet the bed. It's a hassle but really no big deal.

I wanted to let you know that before I had my babies I worked at a Chiropractor and know that this worked for two of our paitents. If you are unsure about a manual spinal adjustment for a child, ask the chiropratcor to use an activator instead. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions! Good luck

My son had the same problem. He was hard to potty train and finally he stayed dry during the day but wet at night. I tried the alarm too. (It just is a pain to use!) When he was about 9 my pediatrician finally gave him a prescription for Desmopressin. My son took it at bedtime for maybe 6 months. It worked like magic as soon as he started taking it. On his own doing, he decided he didn't need the medicine anymore and stopped taking it. He has been fine since. He is 11 now. My daughter (8) has the same problem. I think it is hereditary.

Hi M.,

Maybe you shouldn't let him drink after a certain hour leading up to bedtime. Make him go before he gets in the bed and if you stay up for a couple of hours while his sleeping, wake him up and make him go before you lay down.

Y.

Hi M.!

Check out www.nobedwetting.com. We have selected this treatment plan for our 10 year old son with great results. When visiting the website, read everything, watch the videos, and be ready to learn a lot about why bed wetting occurs. You will be amazed.

Good luck!
L.