Bed Wetting @ Night

Don't know if this is much comfort, but my mom has told me that when she was dealing with this with me so many years ago, she kept telling her self "she won't wet the bed by the time she's in college"! I think it just took me a long time to grow out of - and no pull-ups back then! Maybe try some training pants and see if they work. Reusable would certainly be cheaper in the end. Good luck, mama!

This is so common. I would suggest you try an alarm pad that will go off when anything wet hits it. This goes over the sheet and tucks under the mattress.

My stepdaughter wet the bed until she was 14. We enrolled in the program at www.hargitthousefoundation.com and the main thing they suggested was cutting out dairy at night - milk, cheese, ranch. It was tough, but I guess it helped her sleep less deeply. Whatever you do, don't be upset with him. He must hate it, too (or he soon will). Good luck! J.

S.
I experienced a similar situation with my oldest son. Honestly my concern and frustration were equal. I became a single parent when he was 3, youngest son was 1 1/2, daught was 5.
I thought about what must be going on his mind and how it was affecting him. And the questions: what if???? etc. And I thought about the additional washing work etc. At the end of the experience which took some nasty turns ie: remarriage to a man who mocked my son's problem, teasing by his brother and sister, and my own unspoken personal questions about is any of this my fault added to the simple issue of bedwetting and even some resentment.

All that being said S., the real point is bedwetting is fairly common and quite natural. Certainly a child is affected by the amount they drink in the hours before going to bed and how tired they are. Some children sleep so deep that they truly don't feel the 'urge' and even the warmth of the urine doesn't disturb them.

There really isn't much to do except to accept that for a time this is how he is. You can go the medicine route and shock therapy (sheets with alarms when they get wet) but really that is more behavior modification on your part.

What if you accepted that for now he will need the more expensive sleep pants that protect YOU from having to wash sheets daily? It won't last forever, and you will be blessed when as an adolescent he isn't stigmatized by the bedwetting due to your response. If you accept it and teach him to accept himself, then he will have a confidence in himself no matter what gets said about the 'accidents' that happen. Many boys told my young son they too had 'accidents'. I learned to manage his exposure to the chances of it happening away from the security of home. You could talk to his teacher at school and ask her to help. She could send him to the restroom before naptime and other kinds of help. If she doesn't have any othere ideas talk to someone else at your sons school.
Just remember, bedwetting is really NO BIG deal. It will go away and you will have a 'normal' night with your son.
I guarantee it!!!! At 51 years old I've seen enough to know about this. Blessings.

So many suggestions just seem so harsh to me. Maybe because I wet the bed so long growing up. My parents tried everything - the alarm, the nosespray, waking me up twice a night to go to the bathroom - and nothing worked. I finally just outgrew it. But the one thing I can say is that they never made me feel ashamed. I knew that I was doing something bad and annoying. But THEY never said that to me. They changed my bed and my dad pulled my mattress outside every morning and back inside every night. I knew it was a hassle and I was embarrassed that I couldnt stop. But THEY never made me feel like I was "costly" or "annoying."

There really is no reason for alarm. I don't know the statistic's, although the percentage of children, especially boys, who's bladders haven't matured at his age is pretty high. If he is still doing this past the age of 8, then you should be concerned. One of my twins is 5, he still wears good nights. At 4 he was wetting every night. At 5 yrs. 4 mo. he is wetting once or twice a week. Here are some tips to help: No juices, no sodas, especially after 6 pm. If he is drinking lots of sugar filled juices throughout the day I would try to limit and in a positive way introduce water or milk as an alternative. If he does get thirsty in the evening, give him only sips of water or milk, not a cup. Also, if he does wake up dry re-use the good night. I never disposed of them unless they were dirty. I can so relate to what you are going through, but I promise it does get better. Good luck!

Really S., you aren't doing anything wrong. He will grow out of it but maybe not as fast as you want him too. I have a grown son now that did the same thing until he was almost 7-1/2. There was underlying stress that bothered him and he finally stopped before he was 8 years old. I tried all the same things as well as getting him up in the middle of the night a couple of times. My husband and I were soooooo upset and that was the unwanted stress on my son. It's no big thing. He is as stressed about it as you are and he won't tell you about or can't tell you about because he is just a little boy. Don't make a big deal out of it to him everyday. Just periodically tell him that he, and you, will be happier when he can stop wetting the bed. The doctor is right, it is just something that happens for some little children. We pressure them to start potty training and then we don't understand why they can't get it all together so we won't be embarrassed by the accidents. Give him some time.....it'll happen. You are stressing yourself out over something that will go away on its on.
Wishing you luck.

You doctor can't do anything about it! Your son's body and brain need to develop a little more. Stop washing sheets and just use an off-brand of pull-ups. This is normal.

This is very developmentally normal for a boy. Most boys aren't ready to go all night dry at this age.
I would relax and try not to push too hard. If you make a big deal about this now, it could back fire on you. Toileting is such a sensitive issue with kids. His body will regulate when he is ready. The Good Nights are expensive, but if you break it down and figure how much that equals per day it really isn't that much (if you are only using one pull up at night). I buy them for my daughter and it really costs less than $20 a month. I know it can be frustrating. Just try to be patient; this really is normal.
Hope this helps!

You are not going to like the answer I am going to give you, but your Dr. is right. There really isn't anything you can do about it right now and it is actually not unusual for boys to wet the bed until they are about 7 yrs. of age. Boys sleep a lot deeper than girls and don't necessarily wake up when they need to go to the bathroom. They do eventually grow out of it, but in the meantime, there is likely nothing wrong with him and therefore there is nothing that can be done.

THis is not uncommon at all! Just be sure that you do not make him feel bad about it, be sure he knows it is NOT his fault and that he will eventually outgrow it! It is just that some boys take a lot longer than others. It may even take years as he could be a very sound sleeper so do not worry and just keep trying to get up and take him in the middle of the night IF YOU WAKE up and think about it... no worries though it will get better : )

I know exactly what you are going through. My son wet the bed until he was almost 10 years old. We tried everything from not letting him drink past a certain time at night, which didn't work because lets face it... when they look at you & tell you their thirsty, how can you deny them a drink. We tried getting him up periodically during the night, but most of the time he would basically sleep walk to the bathroom with me guiding him so he wasn't really even waking up AND it just plain wore me out, because I was not getting a full nights sleep. Then they came out with the Goodnights which were fantastic until he started wanting to go to sleep overs & have sleep overs. He went to a couple of sleep overs & ended up getting made fun of at one of them for "wearing diapers". That was very difficult for him & heartbreaking for me to see him suffer that embarrasement!!! Kids can be so cruel!! Finally when he was about 7 years old we found a doctor that recommended that we try the nosedrops. (I am sorry it has been several years & I don't remember the name of the medication, just that it was nosedrops) It was fantastic! It kept him dry through the night without fail & didn't seem to have any side effects that were very bothersome. His mouth seemed to be dry in the mornings & he would drink a little more than usual, but he didn't seem that bothered by it. He was just very proud that he no longer wet the bed. What it did for his self-esteem was priceless!! Than finally shortly before his 10th birthday we stopped using the medicine temporarily to see what would happen, & he no longer was wetting & didn't need the medicine from there on out. YEA!!! I would strongly recommend giving it a shot! It was well worth it & I am happy we did! I even wish I would have known about it sooner than I did! Good Luck!

I have a really 6 almost 7 year old boy that is a really heavy sleeper. When he gets overly tired, he wets the bed. Even if we cut off the liquids and make him go to the bathroom before bed. What I have done to cut down on some of the laundry is put an XL disposable lap pad. I think that is what they are called. You find them near the incontinence products in the drugstore. These are large enough to cover the entire width of his twin bed. I put one under the mattress pad and then one on top of the mattress pad under the sheets. This way if he has an accident I only have to clean up him, his clothes and the sheets. If he has a really bad accident, the mattress pad gets wet, but not the mattress since their is that other pad there. Hope this is helpful. We have seen a dramatic decrease in the number of accidents over the last 18 months, as he is getting older. Also, we tend to see more when he is having a growth spurt, since he tends to sleep more and in a heavier state. My daughter had the same problem, she is 13 now, and did eventually grow out of this problem.

Hello, my son is 6 and 1/2 and he still wets bed at night. His told me at age 5 -when this started happening-because did not always occur- the doctor said when the children begin to experience their REM sleep, the bed wetting is very common, and it is NOT their fault. Our doctor said to just deal with pull ups antil he adjusts.

I know when I was growing up, I did not quit having accidents until about age 9 !!

Good luck!

My daughter is about to be 8 and she still has the problem. We now have a uroligist that we work with. They ran all the test and her bladder is normal size and functions properly but they did discover that her bm's were not regular. She has too much pressure from her bowels on her bladder and she just can't hold it. Also, she is a very heavy sleeper so it take a freight train to wake her up. Unlike your son, my daughter sometimes has accidents at school. Not full blown accidents but drips b/c she cannot hold it. The medicine has been working great and we have seen quite a change. I did buy her panties from 'one step ahead' they look normal but are thicker. You may want to check them out. Also, your son is still a little young and he may be growing out of it soon. I am thankful for pull ups!!!! Love them. Ps her younger sister 5 has never wet the bed. Not once. They are just built so different. That truly amazes me. Good luck and god bless!!!

I have the same problem. My son is completely potty trained during the day but at night always wakes up with a wet pull-up. He is 4 and will be 5 in November. I have been told by many that this is normal for a boy. Sorry I don't have advice for you. I am trying not to worry about it.

My Grand daughter is a bed wetter and she is 10. The doctor said she is just a very heavy sleeper and has a bladder that is slow to mature. She had several test done and in the end was put on medication. It has worked great. The doctor did not want to start her on it until she reached 5 years. She did have to increase the dosage as she got older. It seems to be hereditary as her father was a bed wetter until he was 12. Plastic mattress cover and pull ups will help until he matures. Be patient and ralize it is not his fault and this too will pass. Sorry I do not have the name of the medication. I know we don't like to put our children on a lot of medications but this helps and will make your little boy feel better too. I do think my grand daughter is almost out grown the problem now as she has missed her meds several times with no problems. I have noticed no side effects from the meds and she is much happier.

I know this is very frustrating for you, but honestly at his age theres not a whole lot you can do. I was a bedwetter when I was young. My daughter was too. And I have a 5 year old son that is too...right now. From all the info I've read and doctors I've talked to, the problem is from the bladder not being strong enough. There is an exercise that can be done, but because your son is so young it's not a good idea to try it yet. I learned it when I was about 7 or 8, and I tried it with my daughter (who is now 14) around the same age and it worked. When he gets ready to go to the bathroom during the day, have him sit on the potty and hold his pee for as long as he can first, then he can release it. This exercise helps strengthen the bladder muscles. But once again, it's not really recommended for little ones because they really don't understand...at 4 and 5 and 6 they just know they need to potty. I know pullups are expensive, I have to buy them for my 5 year old, but it's worth it so your not washing sheets everyday, and cloths.
Good luck!!!

This may not be his problem, but I had a friend that whenever her child had dairy products, ice cream, cheese, etc. of and afternoon or evening , they wet the bed. Limit liquids at evening. Don't know if you ever saw the TV series with the ranch and Cartrights, but the person playing little Joe, said he had a problem clear up to high school & it really embarrased him, but you are asleep so of course can't help it. I feel he will get over it, you'll just have to be patient in the mean time if the above suggestions don't help.

Hi S.,

I would recommend you have him checked out by a pediatric chiropractor. I learned that this is one of the easiest ways to address this issue AFTER the fact in our household many years ago. An alternative is to have him checked out by a good craniosacral practitioner.

Let us know how it goes.

Blessings,

M.

My son will be 6 in September and he still wets the bed. It is because they are sleeping to deep and something in their body has not fully matured (can't remember what the Dr. said). I love my Dr. He actually will prescribe a pill to help stop it. He said for me to come back when the bed wetting interferes with him wanting to have or go to sleepovers. I am close to getting to that point. Not crazy about putting him another pill, but quality of life is important.

Nothing else you do besides waiting it out will help. It just happens. You can wake up, wake him up, stop giving him stuff to drink at a certain time, etc.. I have done it all and it will not stop the issue.

Good luck.. I agree.. Good Nights are expensive and they actually hold the most fluids. A cheaper brand will only leak worse.

Hi I had a boy who is now 7 but still wet the bed till about 6. His doc told me too that he was not ready to go thru the night without peeing and he was sleeping too deeply to feelt he urge. I was told to wait till he was older like 9 before trying medication. Anyway I was sick of it and ended up investing in a product that you attach to their underwear that has an alarm. If the child pees...the alarm goes off and they wake up and you have to take them to the bathroom to finish. Its still a lot of work the first week but it really does work! The noise is obnoxious and the child is trained to respond to it...you have to help them bc you have to get to the child, turn off the alarm and then take child to the bathroom and may even need to change the pad if there is a lot of pee in it. a few nights of these accidents and they are trained. Our son took about a week...other people have had to do it for a month. do it when you have time. The product is available at Leaps and Bounds an online retailer and is called the Night Trainer. I will send you the link:

http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId...

It is very expensive but it was worth it if you really use it....will pay for itself. Also make sure you get the tight fitting boxer type underwear not briefs...hanes makes them...its important to get a good fit for the pad to fit well.

I just read the other posts in this thread. I want to add that we understood that my son had no control over his bladder at night and never punished him for it. He was very upset at the peeing and wearing of pullups at 6 bc his younger brother who was 2.5 was potty trained in weeks and was totally dry at night! so it was an additional complication for us bc older son was just very angry and battlign us to wear pullups and was suffering low self esteem as a result. thats what made the night trainer so worth it in my opinion.

Anyway good luck!

I just don't think he is ready to be night trained. Even though pull ups are expensive, it's better than changing the sheets everyday. Besides what is that doing to his self confidence? It must upset him to try to do something that you want him to do and not be able to do it. I think you should listen to his doctor and just not worry about it for now. Let him decide when he is ready and capable of staying dry at night. Good luck to you and your little boy!

Hi S.,

He may be scared walking to the restroom in the dark by himself. I know that was my problem when I was little. Maybe you could try extra lighting in the hall and bathroom. Also, positive reinforcement always works well. Reward him with praise when he has a good night. And here is the most definite way to get it to stop. Do not let him have drinks before bed. Period.

purchase a MALEM bed wetting monitor. It will wake him up before he pees himself with an alarm. IT works! It is about $100. Worth every penny.

L.

My mom used to get me up to go to the bathroom, set my hair and whatever only problem was -- I was asleep! You could be training your son to pee in his bed if he is not fully awake when you get him out of bed. Make sure he can answer simple questions like "what room are you in". After learning this trick, it didn't take long for him to learn to wake up and go on his own. Oh yes, I also made him strip the bed and put the sheets in the washer and help me make it up with clean sheets. I don't know if the added work on his part made him want to change :-) but it sure helped me.

My son is 6 and still has problems at night. His doctor also said not to worry about it. He will grow out of it. The doctor told us that if we stopped letting him drink at 6:00 pm we might could control it. My brother also had problems when we were little, without pullups of course, and my mom had him tested for everything. He eventually grew out of it about 12 yrs old. I know that is not really reassuring having to wait that long, but I wanted you to know it is not uncommon. My son apparently has a small bladder. After he drinks one glass of water he can go to the bathroom 5 times within 1 hour. I think it is just their bodies being developed.
Good Luck.
S.

My son is 6 1/2 and just started going all night without having accidents. We kept him in pull ups until he was about 5 1/2 then we started in underwear but woke him before we went to bed and took him to the bathroom. At around 6 1/4 we let him go all night in underwear and he is now accident free at night. He gets up when he needs to go to the bathroom. My younger son is 4 and still wears pull ups at night as do all of his friends that are boys that age (and a majority of the girls). I was tod by many people- moms and doctors- that it can take boys awhile to be trained at night. It is normal. My 6 year old still has friends that need pull ups at night.

HI S.,

I know this is frustrating but it is completely normal. Also, boys and girls are worlds apart on this issue. Popping a pill for your convenience (I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, it is not meant in that spirit) is not the answer. This is just plain biology, not a discipline or even a mental issue. There is nothing your doctor can do--your son's body just has to be ready, and from the answers you have so far it is obvious he will grow out of it. I have issues with the "alarm" because that gives the connotation that there is something "bad" going on that needs an alarm. If your son feels guilty about it it will only get worse. Our children are under so much pressure to develop at a faster pace than children 20 or even 10 years ago, and parents are too quick to be paranoid if their child doesn't measure up to whatever the trend is. Bite the bullet and put a Pull-up on him at night.

My daughter is 7 and still has problems staying dry at night. My doctor told me that there is a hormone that the body releases that helps them to hold it through the night and my daughters body has not released that hormone yet. I asked her when we needed to be concerned she said puberty. We don't make a big deal out of it, we don't want her to feel ashamed of herself for something she can't help. She spends the night with her friends like normal and you would be surprised how many kids have the same issue. You could go with the expensive machine that has an alarm when your childs starts to go that would wake him up. He'll get it. It might just take him longer. Good luck!

Hi there -

I am not to this stage yet (our daughter is 18 months) so I am not speaking from personal experience but a good friend of mine when through this with her kids. Her doctor said not to get them up at night to potty or to extremely limit water intake prior to bed - he said that just discourages their blatters from catching up to their bodies. I know she used pull-ups at night for years until the little one's blatter grew to match her size.

Hope this little bit of info helps.

So, your story sounds familiar. My mother-in-law has the same problem with her son who is 5 and it been like that for a while and she still has problems with him wetting the bed. This what she told me. Her doctor told here that it does has to do something with the brain. Different parts of the brain grow faster than others. The part of the brain that alerts him to wake up to go pee has to develope and mature it's self. So eventually they will grow out of it. But in the mean time you should cut liquids off early. Yes pull ups are expensive but they will help for the time being. See there are times when she told me that he tells her he didn't go pee pee and he is excited. Thats just one pull up you saved. She never makes him feel bad. It will be hard but until then hold in there. I hope my words help you a bit.

My girl is 5 also and she is still having that problem. They say she will grow out of it, but it seems to take forever. I have 2 alarms set so she can wake up and go to bathroom. I take her before I go to bed 10pm then the alarms go off at 1am and 4am and that sometimes helps. If she wakes up to the alarm. My room is downstairs and hers is upstairs thats why I have alarms set so she can wake up. Good Luck

I remember those days. My son who is now 10 wet the bed until he was about 6yrs old. I stopped giving him anything to drink after 7 or 7:30. His bedtime was 8 so taht gave hin time to potty before gojng 2 bed. Initially, we still had accidents, but after a couple of weeks, he didn't wet the bed anymore.

What would you have the doctor do, since you said he would do nothing? Do you want him to come to your house and take him to the toilet? The reason the doctor is doing nothing is because there is nothing to do. You have to wait until his bladder is bigger and the only thing that can do that is time. The only thing for him to do is rule out a Bladder infection/UTI. But from your post, it sounds like he is not having that. You have not mentioned anything that remotely sounds like he is having pain on urination, fever, malaise, poor appetite, nausea or vomiting, foul smelling urine. And I would think that the doctor didn't suspect that either or your son would already be on an antibiotic. The only other thing I would suspect is that he sleeps so hard he doesn't wake up when the bladder signals the urge to go....And it can only hold so much.
I am sure you have heard all the things like limiting fluids after 7 or 8 in the evening, getting him up to take him to the bathroom, etc. You may try water proof sheets or pads. Plastic underpants like the kind that cover diapers. But I suspect that you are already using those things or have thought about those.
My best suggestion is to have him on a bladder training schedule. That you get him to go on the two hour mark during the day, every day for several days. Then you gradually increase it by 30 minutes. This should help train the bladder to hold a little more and to hold the urine for longer. And while you are doing it, drink lots of fluids so he can feel the discomfort of being full before he goes. Hopefully, with the bladder going regularly and slowly increasing volume and time, it will help it to stretch and accomodate the extra fluid at night. But it takes up to a month to six weeks for bladder training and then it still doesn't work all of the time. When you are up to holding for 4 hours, then you can wake him in the night at the 4 hour mark and see if that helps. Hopefully, it will.
Other than those things there is not much to do for a slow growing or weak bladder that may take a while to catch up with the rest of his body.
Good luck,
L.

I have found that Dr's aren't concerened until around 8 years old. That's heartbreaking for a mother who has to wash sheets and buy Goodnights everyday. I feel your pain. I have 3 boys who wet the bed. My girl never has. I got my oldest(6yo) trained a year ago using an alarm from the bedwetting store and have meant to use it my second son this summer but have not had much chance because of different circumstances. I plan to have him broke by the time school starts though. Go to www.bedwettingstore.com
I got the gold one with the bed pads which makes it sooo much nicer, you only have to change the pad and not the sheets. It took a couple of months to get my oldes to stop, but IT WORKED!!!!
Good luck,
J.

I too was a bed wetter and I had and have UTI's and Kidney Infections quite a bit. However I did grow out of wetting the bed so not sure if they went hand in hand or not. You should cut out drinking a few hours before bedtime and keep getting up to tell him to go potty when you can. However he should out grow it, but get a second opinion if you dont agree with your doctor. Good luck.

HI S.,
My daughter also had this same problem. Our doctors prescribed desmo D. It worked great. When I thought that she was ready to not use the medicine we just stopped using it. Hopefully that helps you.

Bed wetting is normal in a lot of children and they will eventually grow out of it. Most of the time is because some children sleep deeper than others and are not able to wake up when they feel the urge. In fact, a lot of children will dream that they are getting up to go and are in fact still heavily sleeping. The best advice I can give is to be patient. Limit liquids after supper and if you can, get him up at night before you go to bed or if you wake up. I bought the generic overnights and made sure to have a plastic bed cover for the mattress. I would talk to the school to ask them to make sure he goes to the restroom before naptime or include a pull-up (generic) for precautions.

It's not something your son can help, but it is something he will grow out of. A lot of time the tendency is genetic, meaning a parent probably had the same issue as a child. This is normal for a lot of children including my own.

I know it's probably not the solution you wanted, but I hope it helps some.

My nephew is a hard sleeper, and I thought that was one of the reasons he was wetting the bed. I kept him for a couple of weeks,and I didn't allow him to drink anything a couple of hours before bed, and it helped. He was about 5 at the time. The thing that really helped was having enough light so he wasn't afraid to get up and go. I don't know if that is your problem, but it may help. He didn't wet the bed anymore after that until he went home.