Advice for Sleepless 6 Month Old

Hi,

I would look into the side effects of the Zantac. Maybe there is something that is causing him to be restless and that is why there is a problem. Or, if there is something in it, try giving it to him in the morning and hopefully by night he will be able to sleep.

Also, if he has GERD, try adjusting her crib mattress so it is on an incline. That may help with the indigestion.

Also, all the sleep books say it takes a few days to a week of crying to get them to sleep. So, if you can stand it, try to let him cry it out again!

Good luck!

Hello A.,
I can feel your pain. My daughter is 11 months old and has just started consistently sleeping through the night (halleluiah). What worked for us is moving her bed time up an hour. We use to start her night time routine (with a bath) at 8 and then to bed by 8:30-8:45. Love (she's one of the many amazing mom's on here) recommended moving her bed time up and hour and I reluctantly did. I work 40 hours a week and I get home at 4:30 and didn't want to lose 1 more hour of time with her. I did it anyways and she wakes up one night a week (if that) and goes right back to sleep. I was amazed. I guess she was over tired. It's worth the try!
As far as being at each other throats, try to remember this will be over someday and you want good memories...not argument memories =O) I agree that you should take turns on the nights that each of you get up! Try to take naps also. I get very upset with my husband when I’m over tired and I’ve finally learned to say to him, “do you want grouchy me or well rested me?” and then I take a nap.
Best of luck!
C.

Probably a growth spurt, or like the other mother said... could be teething. The one thing that concerned me was that you have him on zantac and don't even know if he has GERD! That stuff has some SERIOUS side effects for babies. Maybe his fussiness or crying is because he no longer has enough stomach acid to digest the rice cereal.
Oh and 4 hours of crying is WAY too much. At the most we're talkin 15 minutes of leaving him alone. If he doesn't stop then that tells you that there is something wrong.
Have you tried letting him sleep on his tummy? I know! Doctors say on the back only, but my son has slept on his tummy since he was a week old... and most all of the SIDS cases occur right after a vaccination. (The gov't just ignores the "coincidence") Try flipping him over to his tummy. That way if he has gas he'll force it out on his own from the pressure on his belly.
Secondly, there are "mobiles" that are light projectors. It will play music and project little scenes on your wall or ceiling if you really want him to sleep on his back. That might give him something to look at and soothe him in to sleep.
As far as you and your husband being at each other's throats... well...this is probably why they say never use a baby to bring a relationship together because more often than not the baby can push a wedge in between the parents. I would suggest that you two alternate who gets up with him. That way one of you is sleeping while the other is awake and you can each catch a little bit of sleep.

Is it possible there is something bothering him? He may be in some kind of pain. Take a look at his diet, (and if you breatfeed, your diet.) Many children who have food allergies will get pain when they consume the offending food. Dairy is especially troublesome to many people and can cause much pain the the belly region. There are also those who are gluten sensitive (you can research that on google)and MANY of the grains are intolerable to them.
For babies,the reasons they cry "excessively" without being comforted are few. Pain or tiredness are the clues that are missed most often by parents.
Many doctors in the past used such blanket words as "colic" for a baby who cries a lot. Hmmm. When I hear that term I shudder because it means that the doctor has no idea why the baby is crying. They pass it off with a clinical term and send the parents on their way, as though it is normal for a baby to be crying excessively. But worse is that now they placate and give medications for something they don't even know if the babies have. Reflux seems to be the new blanket term because all these babies are now being diagnosed with reflux.
Babies use crying to tell us they have a need to be met. The more painful the situation is for the child, the more demanding the cry will get. A cry for attention or a dirty diaper will not have the same kind of 'demand' that pain or tiredness will have. I think many people also don't realize just how much sleep a baby needs. Babies need to sleep A LOT. That is when they grow. Keep track of how much your baby sleeps in a 24 hour period and compare it to the baby books to see if he is getting enough. It's even a good idea to keep a written record of sleep times. I did, ( and it was easy to loose track of how long the baby had been awake if I was busy.)and it helped a lot to keep them on schedule. The baby would be crying and all I had to do was look at my feeding/naping schedule to see that,oh yes, she should have been put down a half hour ago. She's tired. I was constantly putting my babies down for naps. until they were a year old, we didn't leave the house much! But it was important for me to keep them on schedule. Routine is important. The more they sleep, the more they sleep. I had happy babies.

Dear A.,
I completely empathize with your situation. I had a very hard time with my son and I tried so many different things. A good friend recommended a book, Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth and it has changed how I view infants/children and sleep. There are so many books out there, but I so wish I had this before baby was born. Anyway, we had glimmers of success a few times and then at around 8 or 9 months things just clicked. I don't know how else to describe it. I think a huge part of it was age and another part was probably my own anxiety. I finally just decided to give the method in the book a shot and with persistence and a lot of patience, it just clicked. Naps were also hard to get consistency with (he just didn't want to nap), but we kept at it and after a while he got it. I must emphasize how different each baby is. There are many testimonials/examples in the book which helped me and although we aren't perfect everyday with naps, we consistently get through the night without issues. He is put in his crib around 7pm and I don't get him until 7am. I was a new person when he started sleeping through the night. Teething certainly interrupts his sleep but never to the point where he doesn't go back to sleep (of course Orajel or Tylenol help ahead of time). No doubt, you will get many examples of what worked from all of us and you may end up using a combination. Whatever you do, I still highly recommend the book which covers infancy through toddlerhood. Just be patient with yourself and with him and I'll be praying things click for you all soon.

Hi A.,
I HIGHLY recommend reading "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth to understand biological sleep rhythms. You didn't say what his sleep schedule is like but this was my daughter's at that age. Wake up at 6:30-7am, morning nap at 9am, afternoon nap at 1pm and bedtime at 6-6:30pm. I adjusted times a little depending on how well she slept during her naps and her overall appearance. Per Dr. Weissbluth, the BIGGEST reason for nightwaking and difficulty falling asleep is too late a bedtime. It sounds as though he is really overtired. "Sleep begets sleep" as Dr. Weissbluth says and I found it to be SO true! If my daughter (almost 3 yrs old) goes to bed too late, she ALWAYS wakes up at night and wakes really early in the morning. She has stopped napping and is asleep by 7pm at the latest and sleeps until 6:15-7am. I believe ALL babies can become good sleepers if the parents are willing to adjust their lives/schedules to accommodate the child's need for sleep. (So does Dr. Weissbluth)

As to the rice cereal, my daughter could never tolerate it so I gave her oatmeal instead. The rice just gave her a tummyache and difficulty pooping.

You and your hubby need to be well rested in order to be good spouses and parents. I REALLY understand what being exhausted does to a marriage, I pretty much cried ALL the time and thought I hated my hubby as I was the only one who got up with our daughter. Things are terrific now so there is hope for you! :)

Email me if you want more info on Dr. Weissbluth's methods. Always happy to help and share.
Sincerely,
L.

I can only say I feel for you. I have lived what you are going through but my son is now 8 yrs. old. My son had ear infections. We got tubes and that helped but that was definitely not the only problem.

Wish I could help. Nothing we did ever really made it better. We tried zantac too. He grew out of the really bad part of it but always had trouble falling asleep. So, we tried melatonin when he was about 5 yrs. old. If I'd have known about it when he was an infant, I would have used it. His doctor says its totally harmless. There is a liquid that you can put under their tongue. We still use it every night.

Good luck to you.

Here's the moral support -- it won't last forever.

p.s. - Gotta agree with Jennifer -- the Zantac makes me a little nervous.

I feel your pain.

My 7 month old is not the greatest sleeper either. I will tell you that over the last week or so we have started to get some 6hour stretches and that has been heaven.

As far as the GERD, the Dr told me to elevate the head of the baby's mattress (put a folded towel under the matterss) to help keep the reflux down.

Other things we tried is giving formula at the first night waking, it seemed to "hold her over" longer than breast milk.

As far as hubby and I go, we try to relieve eachother, I go to bed early and he tends to baby and then I get up early and he sleeps in...

The best advice my mom gave me, "This too shall pass."

Count me in as one of those who thinks it's fishy that your dr. put your son on Zantac and isn't even sure if he's treating GERD. Ask for an upper GI (It's not invasive. The baby drinks barium and some x-rays are taken.) or a referral to a gastrointestinal specialist.
However, if your son does have GERD, maybe the Zantac isn't working for him. How long has he been on it? Some medications take a while to take effect. Also, have you tried putting him to sleep on an incline? Babies who have GERD should sleep on an incline to keep the stomach acid from coming up their esophagus. You can try it out by putting him in his car seat to sleep one night. If he sleeps better that way, buy a wedge for his crib.

My daughter didn't sleep more than 4 hours a night for well over the six month mark. Somtimes, during growth spurts she still wakes up 2-3 times a night at 18 motnhs. She sleeps with me. This helped a lot. Is your child just waking up? or is he waking up and wanting to nurse? Children that age with faster metabolisms need to nurse every four hours. If it isn't to nurse, maybe it's tummy trouble? What do you mean that he won't come to bed with you to sleep? For me this was the lifesaver. But it is only if you are breastfeeding, cause then all you have to do is roll over (not even wake up sometimes) and feed him and he falls right back to sleep.

oh my god, i would love to talk with you. I am having all the same issues! My son is almost 6 months! It is exhausting! Email me if you want to talk. Zantac didn't work for us after a week so I tried Colic Calm... then I went to see a specialist (Osteopathic MD) and he seems alittle better the past couple weeks!

____@____.com

Try this schedule out (put in your own times that work for your family):

8-10 - breakfast and playtime
10-12 - naptime
12-2 - lunch and playtime
2-4 - naptime
4-6 - dinnertime
6-7 - rest time in the crib (possible catnap..in transition to extending his time awake for 4 hours - by 7 mos.)
7-8 - last bottle then off to bed by 8-9pm - make this a quiet, low lit meal with not too much noise or talking. This way he knows it's night time.

Make sure he doesn't dose off during the feeding/awake hours. Make sure he's warm at night.
Make sure the TV isn't on during the day or night.

Keep this schedule going for at least 2 weeks to get results. We read babywise and chose the parent direct feeding method. It has worked for both of our daughters and for many of our friends/relatives too. He needs you to help stabilize his metabolism. When he wakes up in the middle of the night, try to change his diaper first before nursing/feeding him. Best if you don't even feed him, but if he won't stop crying, you will have to feed him. If you change his daytime schedule with the right amount of naps, his night time schedule will change with it. So don't lose heart and be consistent with his daytime schedule. He will soon sleep through the night. Our second daughter started to dose off during the daytime and gave us trouble. We had to keep waking her up and soon she stopped waking up at night. Good luck with your baby and I hope this helps you out.

I think you need to rule out this being a medical issue (e.g., gastrointestinal) before you can really focus on this being a sleep issue. If the rice cereal made him fussy, then he might have a gastrointestinal issue and/or allergy. You should write down everything he eats as well as what you eat if you are breastfeeding, as well as his reactions after eating. My kids got very gassy and uncomfortable after I ate certain foods, but for me that seemed to resolve around 4-6 months. There are also a lot of developmental issues around 4-6 months (sitting, rolling, crawling, teething, etc.) that can affect sleep. The book The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems is fantastic for getting on a schedule (which does improve sleep) and for addressing sleep issues. I think at 6 months babies should be on a 4 hour feeding schedule. The book also recommends a "dream feed" where you feed the baby at around 10 pm without waking him. All of these things really helped both of my kids sleep through the night at 3 months. After my kids got used to their cribs at 3 months, they usually preferred to sleep there rather than with us. When we were too tired to sit with our kids to get them back to sleep during the night, we would sleep on the floor in their rooms without talking to them. They seemed to like that. That may help you to figure out if it is a medical/physical issue.
I hope you find a resolution soon and get some sleep!

Hi A.,

You might want to call your pediatrician for some advice. The advice nurses at my pediatrician's office really helped me through this. If my son cries for more than 30 minutes than I know that he is either still hungry or has gas. It is now very rare that he does this. I'm not sure if your son is napping well during the day, but at 6 months mine wasn't, so I started with my nap issue first. I was able to start with a better naptime routine first before I tackled the evenings. When he first wakes I breastfeed him and then he playes for a while. About two hours later I give him solids. We will then mellow things out and read a book or two. As soon as I see him yawn I change his diaper as I sing softly to him, give him his pacifier and we walk back to his room. I then just hold him and sway back and forth. He has started to close his eyes when I do this. Before he is fully asleep I put him in his crib. This took a while and he would cry, but I would come back every 3-5 minutes to comfort him, but I would not pick him up (unless it got too bad). I would let him hold my finger and then gently pull it away. My husband helped out at nights and this seemed to help. I am also giving him a larger amount of solids at night. After dinner he plays for a little bit or we give him a bath. We then have a night routine of saying goodbye to the sunshine - closing all the blinds and turning the lights down low. I try to do the same thing that I do at nap time, but once I notice he is sleepy I do breastfeed him. This has been a lot of work, but it is slowly paying off. I've also learned to not jump out of bed as soon as I hear him - this has been tough, but I found that sometimes he just makes some noises and then falls back to sleep. It's all about consistency to a certain point. My son is 8 1/2 months now and doing much better. I know how tough it is not getting the sleep that you need. My husband and I argued quite a bit during the time when we both weren't getting enough sleep. This time will pass. I wish you the best of luck!!! A.

my 5 month old is the same way so i give her a lil bit of pain mdes might be teathing so give it a shot and see if works .. it shuer helped me out