Worried About Daughter's Weight

If you have a doctor that you chose because you thought he was capable then you should trust his judgement and not worry. To try to force feed or add extra meals might just cause her to become obese in later years. I have 4 children who always were on the thin side as babies and toddlers and they were much healthier than my friends children.

Relax! Listen to the Doctor!

Also I would let her "graze" and eat and not be so confined in the highchair. Put a snack on the table and let her come and take it.

My youngest daughter is exactly the same. My other two ate great and were always over 90th percentile for height and well over the 50th percentile for weight. My little one however is under 20th percentile for height and weight. She has always been little and it really worried me at first. She does drink milk well and I also limit her as I want her to eat more foods but she seems to be very picky. Or, I guess she actually just eats small amounts. She'll try anything but eats only a few spoonfulls at a meal. She does suddenly love berries and will eat a bowl full of those. I know it is so hard to sit back and see them not eating but most pediatricians will tell you they will eat when they are hungry. They listen to their bodies better than we do.

A suggestion for getting rid of the bottle is to buy a different sippy cup than what you use for juice or water. I had to do that with my son. He associated the sippy cup with water or juice and did not want anything else in it. As soon as I gave him a different cup with the milk in it he took it.

Hang in there, you are doing the right thing by offering her healthy foods. She just might be a petite little girl and there is nothing wrong with that !!

L., you are NOT a failure. Last month I was exactly where you are today. Worried sick because my son wouldn't eat and he is on the lower end of the percentile chart. But my pediatrician said that as long as he is growing he is fine. Your daughter will eat when she's hungry. Don't force feed her because you'll only build bad eating habits in the long run. I still give my son a few snacks but have cut back on them a bit. And I tried stretching out his feeding times so that he eats better (a little more) at mealtime. But the realy key is to try to not stress out over how much and how often they eat. I know it's not easy to do that but try your best. If your daughter is playful and active, she's definitely healthy.

Don't beat yourself up! Clearly you are doing everything a loving, healthful mother can do; your doctor is probably right that your daughter is just leveling off. I agree that you shouldn't wean from the bottle yet; whole milk has an abundance of nutrition and calories for your little girl. If she doesn't drink from a cup, you should stick with what works. We just dropped bottles in our household, cold turkey, and my son is 19 months! He won't drink hardly any milk from a cup either, however per our pediatrician it's OK to give him two TUMS per day (cut in half) so he gets some of the calcium he's missing. We're making up the calories and the rest of the calcium with 3-4 yogurts a day.

How does your daughter do with foods like bread and pasta? My 19-month-old was slow to get with the table foods program, and we still feed him jarred food and yogurts for at least 50% of every meal. If your little girl will eat jarred foods, try to load her up on those. Earth's Best has myriad options, and the 3rd foods are pretty hearty. Foods like bread and pasta may help round out fruits and veggies while providing some bulk. I'll be curious to see what the other moms suggest.

Good luck!

I have to agree with your pediatrician. Don't worry about the percentile. All it really means that of all the kids her age she is the same as 5% of them. That is what percentiles are all about. My daughter is almost 2 (at the end of July) and she didn't triple her birth weight (not even close) and she's almost to 25 lbs., still not quite tripling her birth weight (8lb 11oz). Plus me daughter eats none stop from the minute she gets up till she goes to sleep. As long as she's gaining weight there isn't much to worry about. Continue to offer healthy snacks. Continue to offer new foods. Let her eat when she's hungry until she's full. If you force feed her, she will learn to ignore her full feeling and be more likely to have a weight problem later. She's fine. And your doing just fine.

I am a mother of 6 children and two of my four daughters went through this well actually my 19 month old almost 20 month old was born at 7lbs 1.2 oz and at her 19th month check up June /9 she weighed 19.7 lbs and 31 inches tall up from her 16 month check up of 18lbs and 29 3/4 inches. The Dr. took a look at my oldest daughter who is now 15 years of age and had the same problem around the same age and sees that she is fine and dandy so he is less concerned then he was. He also told me she is still growing , she has not come to a standstill so no worries. She like your daughter has hit all of her milestones even early so there is not worry there either. The only difference between your daughter and mine is that mine is still breastfeeding and we don't wean until they are about 28 months old .

I remember how I felt when my second born went through this 14 years ago and how bad I came down on myself. I have to say as long as there is growth don't worry . The Dr. will let you know when to worry.

As for the Pedisure and other drinks like it . My Dr. said to stay away from it as did my local WIC office due to all the chemicals in it . They told me if I decided to make my own , to use dry milk , yougurt , and fruit and make smoothies for her to drink . I hope this easies your mind a bit that there are others out there going through the same things as you and hearing from someone who is there again and came through it with another child.

I do have to add though that the one thing that both of my daughters share that had this problem was a rare problem at birth , and they both had to be under Billrubin lights for over a week for my oldest and the wallbe blanket for my youngest for almost 3 weeks before there was improvement. I keep telling the Dr. I think there is a link but will not know unless others go through the same thing.

Again I hope this has helped you.

If your ped. said don't worry, then don't worry. The more you obsess about it, the more picky she will be come. My son's the same way. Guess what? He's 10 and still a sting bean. The more my mother-in-law fusses about him eating the less he eats. He eats a lot more when she goes on vacation, because there's no stress over food. When he was your daughter's age, he loved macaroni and cheese. That's all he wanted, so that's what we gave him. I don't remember how much milk, but I do remember our ped. saying that milk does fill them up faster and the problem with that is it is liquid calories rather than solid calories. My sister had the same problem with her daughter. Her ped. told her, "a child will never starve themselves." I have found that it is a good idea to have a scheduled meal times; because if they just eat when they are hungry, they won't eat much. My son never gets hungry. Breakfast is around 6:50Am or 7:00Am on week days and 8:00AM on weekends. Lunch is 12:00PM sharp. Super is at 5:30PM.

Hi L.,

I see you've gotten a lot of good responses already, but I want to let you know I just went through the same thing with my son. At his 1-year check-up last month he dropped from just under the 25th percentile to between the 5th and 10th. I was shocked because he seemed like such a good eater, and everyone who saw him couldn't believe how much he ate... but apparently it wasn't enough! My pediatrician recommended that I nurse him before he goes to sleep, rather than when he wakes up from his naps, so he's more hungry at mealtimes. I started doing that and giving him higher calorie foods (like you suggested: avocado, whole milk yogurt and cheese, also cream cheese & jelly sandwiches, etc.) without giving him junk food. We went back to the pediatrician last week to have his weight checked, and he had gained 10 ounces in a month... but that still kept him in the 5th-10th percentile! The doctor said that as long as he was continuing to gain weight and was not dropping further and further off the growth curve, she was not concerned. A friend of mine who is a pediatrician also said that sometimes kids "re-set" themselves on a new curve, and it's nothing to worry about. My son still hasn't tripled his birth weight at 13 months (but is in the 50-75th percentile for height... go figure). Unless your doctor says to give your daughter pediasure, I would just keep doing what you're doing. Babies are born knowing when, how much, and what kinds of foods they need to eat... it's usually us adults who think so much about what we should and shouldn't be eating instead of just listening to our bodies. :)

Good luck!

A.

If your pediatrician said don't worry about it, then I certainly wouldn't worry about it. Just keep doing what you are doing.

If the pediatrician said not to worry, then you really shouldn't. I had the same problem with my son. He was (still is ) a very picky eater and was very thin. Now he is two and has filled out nicely.
I think that their growth goes in cycles and their appetites decline between growth spurts. Also usually they only grow one way at a time. Has she gotten a lot taller lately? Perhaps she is just getting taller rather than wider. At one point my son grew like two inches in a month and his weight practically stayed the same.
During the time that my son seemed to exist off of air I gave him similac go and grow just to assure myself that he was getting enough nutrients (he grew a lot taller during this time). However, it is quite expensive and needs to be mixed. I think that smoothies are also a good option (especially if she won't eat veggies).
I also have the same problem with only drinking milk out of the bottle. He just turned two and I am still battling with that. Hope that this helps.

C.

Hey L.,

I do not think it is abnormal for children to level off or even loose weight at your daughters age. First they are much more active with walking, and running around and second most times their appetite does decline. I know you are reluctant to get rid of the bottle because of her refusal to drink milk but drinking the bottle could be what is filling her up. Most children do not drink their milk from a sippy cup so what most moms do is increase, their calcium with yogurt, cheese, and veggies. Have you tried a cup with a straw? In some cases that will work. If you doctor is not worried then I don't think you should worry. As long as she is not acting sick or lethargic then she is getting everything she needs. Do not blame yourself what you are describing with your daughter is so common and happens with many kids. I agree with you on the pediasure it will probably fill her up and she will only eat less. Good luck

I can complete relate to your worry but listen to your pediatrician. My son went from the 25% to falling off the growth chart entirely. Our doctor monitered him every 3 months but said that this was probably just what his curve was going to be. As long as they do not continue to drop on the curve it is fine. My son is skinny but developmentally fine even ahead in many areas. You are not failing your child and just be happy that she is growing and hitting the milestones.

The last thing you want to do is make your daughter aware of your worries but obsessing over what she eats. There are too many little girls with eating issues. I see 10 year olds in the playground talking about their diets.

Enjoy your little girl!

Hi L., first of all, try not to feel like a failure. No one is perfect when it comes to parenting. I don't know your family background, but if you and/or your husband were thin as children, your just might be genetically pre-disposed to being thin. In other words, a small frame just might be natural for her. Continue to monitor her closely like you are doing, (but without the worry. I would not give her ensure because it is probably full of harmful preservatives. Instead, why don't you start juicing for her now (carrots and apple juice to start and maybe slowly sneak some greens in down the road). As long as she is eating a health and balanced diet, she is fine-unless she continues/starts to lose weight-then further testing should be done. Remember is she is maintaining her weight, there is nothing for you to worry about.

Now for you: Are you taking any omega 3 fatty acids? Are you eating a lot of processed food? If you are eating processed foods, try elimating them as much as possible and start making your meals from scratch. Also, lay off of the pastas, breads,and rice as much as possible (brown rice is okay). Get your vitamin D level checked ASAP and if they are low (most people are especially if they live in the northeast), start taking Carlson's Nordic D cod liver oil. Your hormones are out of wack and this diet will help you to restore them so that you can start to emotionally balance out. Good luck, don't worry and eat healthy.

T. Hall Parker, Holistic Health Counselor
My Food Therapy
www.myfoodtherapy.com
Momma Don't Eat It
www.mommadonteatit.com

My son has been on Pediasure since he was about 1.5
We attach the nipple to the top of the bottle, works well.
He is a terrible eater and at least I know he is getting his vitamin and minerals. One a day...usually...max 2, but it's full of vitamins, so not too much.
Start with Vanilla flavor...you can also mix it with milk
in the beginning. It's expensive, but worth it.

K

Please don't worry about it, you're not a failure, just a loving and caring mom. I think people take those numbers too much to heart. Every child is an individual, and as long as she's happy and healthy, that's the most important thing. It'll end up being an issue for you, and then for her, and it will create more problems in that way.

My 15 month old daughter is very picky, and there are days she eats so little, I'm amazed. But, she'll eat when she's hungry.

You're doing a great job, and if your gut tells you something is REALLY wrong, get a 2nd opinion from another doctor to put your mind at ease.

Hi L.,

I had a very similar issue with my son, who suddenly dropped 10 percentile points when he was around the same age.

Don't worry about your daughter's weight at this point. Unless I misunderstood you, it's not even an actual weight loss, it's just slower weight gain - compared to average. Not all kids follow the lines exactly. Besides, at this age, kids will not starve themselves, they will eat what they need, unless there is a physical issue. Since your daughter is acting perfectly normal, is energetic and happy, there is no reason to worry. That's what my pediatrician told me at the time, and he was right.

As long as your daughter is full of energy, is happy and looks healthy, there's every reason to think she's getting the food intake she needs. It may just be less than you expect, and her weight gain pattern may be more in fits and starts than a regular weight curve.

And please don't beat yourself up for it! You're a great mother! The fact that you worry about this shows it.

Big hug,
K.

You are not a failure. She is a normal toddler. She is
petite. Never has a child starved to death. Believe
it or not they do eat when they are hungry. And remember
there stomachs are tiny. So relax and have a great
summer with your very normal toddler.

Hi L.. My 18 month old son went from 25-40% down to 3rd % for weight. He was 20.6 pound at his 15 month visit. My doctor wasn't too concerned either. But of course I was. I have sought the advice of a nutritionist to help boost calories. My son drinks pediasure twice a day- morning and night. It is filling so I wouldn't give it during the day bc that will fill him up and not allow him to eat other foods. I mix it with whole milk- although if you really want to maximize the calories than don't add milk. I don't have any other great advice since nothing seems to work for us. But, I can say that you can give pediasure or Boost or make your own shakes with whole milk.

If the doctor isn't worried, then relax. Honestly... growth isn't a continuous pattern. She may have another "spurt". There are no developmental concerns, so just keep offering her food and try not to stress at meals. Kids pick-up on this!

Make meals a social time... talk, interact, point out things about foods. If you stress about meals, so will she! This is really normal toddler behavior.

L., they are just precentile's. Doctor's can make you crazy today with "norms" every child is different. My son who is 2 is slightly under 50% percentile with weight because he IS active not a blob that never moves! He also still drinks his milk out of a bottle. he won't drink it out of a sippy or straw & I would rather him drink the milk! Hey, when we were little they didn't even have sippy cups. Your daughter is probably just petitite. Don't worry about her I am sure she is fine. I really hate these "charts" doctors have.

I read your post and can totally relate. My son is 25 months old and is not gaining weight. He has never been on the weight chart but is growing on his own curve. I have worried myself sick over it for 2 years now (he was never a good eater, never took more than 4oz in a bottle per feeding). I started Pediasure at the advice of the doctor at 1 year old but I only give it to him at night so it doesn't affect his appetite. If I give it to him any other time of day he won't eat because it is so filling. I put lots of butter in his food and give him cereal with heavy cream. Add calories to everything. I always make sure I have a healthy snack such as cheese slices which he will usually eat and has better nutrition than pretzels and other snack foods. I agree about healthy foods. My son doesn't really eat sweets or junk because I think every bite he takes has to be "meaningful" (because he takes so few bites a day).
Other things that may help, I usually read to him or let him watch TV while he is eating. I am not a big fan of TV but sometimes it helps if he is distracted. Also, sometimes I let him eat at the coffee table while he is playing. I know that these are not ideal ways to get him to eat but he needs calories more than anything.
Try not to worry so much, I know it is easier said than done, but if she has lots of energy and is happy she is getting enough to eat. Good luck.

Dear L.,

My son was the same way,
I basically scrapped nutricious and healthy for foods he found interesting and wanted to try and eat.

What that meant was Mc Donalds chicken nuggets from the dollar menu.

Spagetti O's,

Grilled cheese

cheese and ham rolls

Grilled panini ( grilled cheese with turkey )

fish sticks with ketchup

French fries.

mac N cheese

apple slices with dip.

yougurt,
Frozen yougurt as ice cream push up.

fluffer nutters
choclate and bread ( nutella)

egg omlets

pancakes

waffles

strawberries with choclate syrup

ice creams

chicken patties with honey mustard sauce

broccoli with cheese

watermelon

goldfish crackers

( I bought a dinosaur bread cutter)

Cookie cutters to make sandwiches interesting.

decorate a muffin

apple slices cut to look like stars, hearts, bears.

pinapple

plums

Whatever you can to tempt her.,

and everything can be dipped in a saucec no matter how disgusting it might seem to you.

----

I also buy cereals , and currently have about 12 boxes in my house to choose from.

( just buy a bag sealer for 10 dollars to keep them fresh

M

my daughter is the same way! she dropped in her weight percentile to and i was so worried! she still hasnt tripled her birth weight and she's 19 months. but what i have come to realize is just as long as their active, happy, gaining weight and not losing it they are probably fine. let her graze. eat when she wants. dont make it a big deal. there will be days when she'll eat everything and days were she'll eat close to nothing. almost all toddlers are like that! try not to look at the charts, just look at your child and really ask if you think their healthy. probably! good luck!

The same thing happened with my daughter as soon as she started eating regular food. The ped. said not to worry as well. My daughter always hovered around the 10th percentile for her weight which has always been a concern. When she turned 2 she dropped from the 10th to the 5th. I voiced my concern to the doctor who explained that it is normal and that they really define healthy growth by the inches they gain. Strong bones and good height growth are more indicators of health than weight is. My daughter is a picky eater too and the doctor suggested that we give her a vitamin supplement but he wasn't even overly concerned with that either.

Don't feel like a failure, you sound like you are doing everything right! Don't give up and enjoy that happy, healthy baby girl. Focus on her learning and experiences and not what she's putting in her mouth. She will let Momma now when she's hungry! Good luck!

Hi L.,
This isn't something that you should make yourself sick over. Your daughter is not out of normal range. It also sounds like she is tall, so if she's putting on the height, it might explain some stalling in the weight area. Also remember that while they may triple their birth weight the first year, they may only gain about 6 pounds in their second year. I don't think it's necessary to take the bottle away if it gets her milk into her. Continue to offer healthy foods and stay in touch with your doctor. If it makes you feel comfortable, ask your baby's doctor if he/she thinks the pediasure would be a good supplement for her.
Good luck

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. All I can say, after going through the toddler years with my three kids, is that I believe their bodies get what they need and grow at their own pace. Even when they moved into the bottom percentiles (after being above 80th percentile), they were still putting on weight.

So I guess my recommendation would be to focus on their relative weight over time instead of worrying too much about where they are on the curve. Especially at her current age when different kids have different activity levels and therefore some really use up what they eat while others that are still relatively stationary still put on weight at a fast pace. I think that really throws off the growth curve at this age. As long as she continues to put on weight (for my very active kids it started being a pound every two months after a year old), I think she is getting what she needs.

I hope that helps a little - good luck!

L.,

Your daughter is active. You are not a failure. She's simply burning it off! Enjoy her activity and don't fret over the food. She's not starving!

If you are still concerned, and don't have to worry about corralling a dog, try a grazing tray. It's a tray with various different foods, finger sized, that she can snack from. Cheese sticks (little cheddar sticks like fat matchsticks), peas, whatever. Have them available where she plays. A good (disposable) tray would be a washed out egg carton.

(Someone protested this idea saying her son would get food everywhere; I said - you are right there with him, right? It's not like you leave him unattended. Problem solved! She thought about it, and said, well, yah!)

She still has a small tummy. Think on a diabetic/diet scale - more meals, less for each meal. Or, snacks interrupted by play! :)

Good luck,
M.

PS: Real food, not pediasure. She's not ill.

Listen to your ped. As long as your daughter is happy, healthy, and full of energy then she's getting plenty to eat. My kids were always on the low end of the weight graph and they are still thin due to their nature not calorie issues.

At 15 months she's so busy learning about the world around her that she doesn't have time to eat. Give her a lot of finger foods. Anything they can dip in a sauce usually goes over well. Try giving food silly names. Do not stress out over this. In a couple months she might be in a growth spurt where she'll eat constantly.

I wouldn't worry. As long as she is not losing weight and your ped isn't worried then you have nothing to worry about. My daughter is going to be 3 in a week and she is only 25 lbs. She is just not a big eater. She is in the 1% for her age but she is healthy. Just remember these charts are a guideline not the rule. My oldest daughter is 5 and in the top 80% and my littlest is in the very bottom. They are both served the same food at all meals it's just my little one eats less and has a faster matabolism. She is very active. Just relax and make sure she is eating healthy calories and not just junk food when she eats and she will be fine. Good luck to you.

I read most of the other responses. The fact that you're worried says that you're a wonderful mom. My own response comes from a mom who worried when the doctor said not to, and it's a darn good thing I worried. No one listened to me when I said something was wrong, and finally, when my son (who is 2.5 now) lost 3 pounds in 6 weeks around Christmas, the doctor said he was in a failure to thrive situation and did a bunch of bloodwork, etc. Now, he went from a strong 85th% and higher baby, to off the charts (in the wrong direction). That's a much more significant drop than most other responses, but it happened over time. His personality also changed to very irritable and lethargic and whiny. And he was waking up at 4am for the day, every day, even though he clearly needed more sleep. And if someone had listened to my concerns back when he hadn't gained weight between 9 and 18 months, maybe he wouldn't have been starving and incredibly ill when he was 2. Turns out he's a celiac - can't have any gluten, and also can't tolerate dairy. Now my doctor sees my 16 month old not gaining weight like she should, and says, "it's time to talk about the failure to thrive panel." I am telling you this because sometimes we see things as parents, and everyone around us tells us not to worry. And we still worry. I don't trust doctors, they missed something they shouldn't have missed, not just with my son, but with my daughter and a bad dairy allergy (caught by her ENT, not her pediatrician). If your child is happy and healthy and energetic, try to just beef her up and wait until the next check up. But if you're worried, don't discount it, and don't let others discount it. I swear, I thought I had munchhausens syndrome by the time we figured out what was going on with my son.