What to Feed a 20 Month Old Is Becoming a Challenge!!

Please listen to an old granny here and believe me when I say: "KIDS WILL EAT HOWEVER MUCH THEY NEED!!" Do you know any American kids (personally) who have starved just because they won't eat? NO. This very quickly turns into a control issue, and you're 'feeding' into it, so-to-speak. He has you where he wants you -- catering to his every whim, coaxing and pampering. I'm sorry, but I get really emotional about this, because (at 52) I have seen 4 different families worry about their 'slim' and/or 'petite' child and make a big deal about his/her eating habits, and ALL of them have turned into obese adults. I'm not kidding. Just because a child is on the lower end of height and/or weight charts just means that's how God made them! I have a granddaughter who's very short/petite, but she's a little fireball with enough energy and personality to keep up with 2 older brothers!

Fix a meal, give your child a small serving of each thing, let him eat whatever he chooses (and give him more of something if he eats it all and wants more), and leave him alone about the rest. You do NOT 'have to' dip everything in ranch dressing. You don't have to provide him 'junk food'. You are only required to provide him lots of love and positive attention, clothing and shelter, healthy meals, snacks and drinks at the right times, and put him to bed at bedtime. If he has energy enough to play, sleeps well, pees and poops normally, and is fairly jolly, then he's healthy! If any of these other factors aren't 'quite right', have him checked out to see if he has any physical problem (besides pickiness)!

God bless, and I hope this helps!

2 moms found this helpful

You know, pasta, pizza, lasagna can be healthy! it's all about how you prepare them -- you can put a ton of veggies in all of those dishes & it becomes a good, balanced meal.

If he likes yogurt, you can do salads that have yogurt dressing, something similar to potato salad, but instead of mayo, use yogurt or sour cream or half sour cream, half ranch.

does he like dips? because you can do stuff like hummus (chickpeas, olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic) and from there on out you can add anything you want to it -- roasted peppers, herbs (basil, thyme, rosemary, oregano) and it's a great dip or spread on a sandwich.

if he likes tuna, you cad do a hommade tuna salad (and then make a sandwich out of it and put hummus as a spread on the bread)

for meats, try meatballs -- again u can add other veggies to the pasta or rice as well as to the meatballs themselves. and if you're worried that your son eats too much pasta, you can sub it for rice, mashed potatoes (or roasted potatoes, in the oven (a bit of olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic, rosemary, butter & bake them, comes out beautiful). and all these things you can prepare & store so you don't have to cook every single day. in the case of lasagna, you can store it baked & non-baked (just make an extra tray & freeze it & then bake it when you have the time).

i don't know why your son is picky, but my son wouldn't eat food that's not seasoned (and he's only 8 months old!). he loves herbs -- i had to start an herb garden on my patio (which in light of recent cold weather has relocated to my kitchen), but i add basil, oregano, thai basil, rosemary, steamed garlic to his food (bought all of them at walmart). but i guess now it looks and smells more like our food so he's happy to eat it. i simplify what we're eating, but he seems to love it. meats are a bit of a struggle as well, but i chop them up fine & mix it in with other stuff.

you can make empanadas/ calzones with meat & veggies and buy the dough at the store then stuff it with whatever you want and it takes about 10 minutes to bake. alternatively, make a pot pie -- my sister who didn't eat anything as a kid, loved the pot pie because she got to dip the dough. and for Halloween, mom used to make it inside a pumpkin (medium size pumpkin, take out the seeds, put whatever inside, cover with dough & bake)

spinakopita (greek dish) is a personal favorite of mine, but takes a bit of time -- filo dough, stuff it with a mixture of spinach, garlic, dill & feta cheese (salt & pepper) & bake in the oven for about 25 minutes. and you can use frozen spinach for this, just make sure to strain it well or it'll be too moist.

if you have time, you can make fresh ravioli (there's a store on off of providence & queen called pasta & provisions) where you can buy fresh pasta for about $1/sheet (for 3 people you need maybe 4 sheets if that) then u can stuff it with whatever, egg wash, seal it & cook it for about 3 minutes. good luck!

i just read some of the other responses. and they're right. i think it's a control issue rather than anything else. my son does this to my husband who is willing to sit around and beg him to eat & gives him something else if the baby doesn't eat (like a cookie, well a teething biscuit). i don't feed into this nonsense -- i do cook for my son every day and make sure that whatever i put in his bowl, i would eat it too, i.e. it tastes good, but if he's not hungry or he starts playing around with his food, i just put him on the floor with words "well when you get hungry, you let me know". and sure enough, 15-20 minutes later, he's ready to eat with no problems and i don't have to ask him to open his mouth.

I'm thinking of trying Jerry Seinfeld's wife's book about sneaking veggies and healthy foods into what kids like. My daughter is very picky!

L., Your son is one of those children that only likes white food. Have you noticed that? Mac and Cheese, pasta, most fruits, chicken, waffles, yogurt and ranch dip are all white. You'll have to trick him into eating veggies. Veggie chicken nuggets were a hit with my "white only" eater. Get Jessica Seinfeld's book called Deceptively Delicious for great recipes that will hide veggies in regular foods. Hope this helps!

Pasta is an excellent source of nurishment. You can be very creative with that. I make many casseroles... Hamburger with peas, cream of mushroom soup and noodles. Put in a baking dish and a good layer of cheese.. Excellent, easy and nutritious. Use chicken, corn, cream of chicken, noodles, and a different cheese.
Grilled cheese.. use whole grain white bread, real butter and cheese.. maybe a piece of ham or turkey. Nutrition is important cna can be achieved with simple changes.

L.,

Keep introducing healthy foods at every meal. He will eventually eat them if he realizes they are going to become a common item on the menu. As far as getting him to sit and eat - there's not many that will sit and eat a meal at that age. I take my 19 month old and put him in the high chair to eat meals with us so he understands that you should sit around the table at meal time. However, I don't stress eating a meal. I give him his plate and spoon and let him do what he wants with it. My son is a "grazer". He eats lots of small snacks/meals every day. I usually get him to eat a great breakfast. It's downhill from there. I leave snacks out where he cann get them if he's hungry. I usually leave raisins, apples, gold fish crackers, cut up fruit, carrots, etc...out where he can get them if he's hungry but I still make him sit at the table at meal time. He will eventually learn that we eat 3 meals a day and snacks in between. But I wouldn't sweat it as long as you are introducing healthy snacks and veggies with your meals. I've always been told that children will eat when they are hungry and that is true. Also, when I do get my son to eat at meal times I don't allow him to have his juice. I notice that he prefers drinking over eating so to encourage eating I keep the juice away until he's eaten a good portion and then I give him juice. I don't make him thirst to death but I want him to eat. Good luck.

Actually, it sounds like you're feeding him a pretty balanced diet.

Keep in mind that there are ways to "sneak" things into his foods and up the nutritional value.
For example, with mac and cheese, add some pureed pumpkin or other winter squash with some cream cheese to the cheese sauce. There's no change in color or texture.
Try making pizzas with him- but make the sauce full of veggies---just blended smooth.
With pasta, just be certain you're choosing a whole wheat pasta- there are several really nice ones on the market that are actually fortified with extra vitamins and minerals.

As for ranch dressing, pre-made can be loaded with unneeded fat and salt--- try making your own just for him to dip foods into.

==================
Just to let you know, a lot of kids go through this. My five year old (who now LOVES his veggies) went through a phase where all he wanted for two years was a peanut butter sandwich. So, while he didn't eat one ALL the time, he did get one probably about 80% of the time. The trick is to learn to build a better peanut butter sandwich. I'd swap peanut butter for almond butter or sunflower seed butter. Instead of jelly, I'd use applesauce, cranberry sauce, honey, or sliced fruit. I varied the bread between whole wheat crackers, graham crackers, tortillas, oat bread, etc... So, in reality there was a TON of variation of his favorite comfort meal.

They say at this age that kids really like to have the same things over and over again. As long as your child is getting fruits and veggies in some ways, then it is okay to keep giving him the same stuff. Children actually rely on that. My daughter would really get upset of I served her a different lunch. For weeks, she wanted the same thing over and over again which I felt guilty about but when I changed it, she didn't eat it. Eventually she wanted something else and we moved on. Keep on doing what you are doing. Also, a little ranch dressing for veggies, and ketchup for other dips is actually not a bad thing especially if your child is slim. Whatever gets him to eat them is a good thing. You sound like a good mom. We all tend to sweat the small stuff!

Speaking of sneaking things in, have you tried pumpkin muffins? All three of my children love them and they are loaded with vitamin A. You can get a great recipe at www.verybestbaking.com. They are called "pumpkin cupcakes" but I just leave off the frosting. Pasta is also a great way to sneak in veggies. I get the chunky garden style sauce and blend it up in the blender and then add ground beef. They have no idea they are eating tomatoes, carrots and zucchini!

You mentioned that your son likes pizza and pasta. I usually make my own sauce for pizza and pasta. If you have a blender cut up some vegtables and puree them. Add them to the sauce. If you are wanting to get more protein in his diet you could try cooking different meats and putting them on pizza or in pasta. Try to choose lowfat/lean meats or chicken.

I love what the "granny" said...and she's absolutely right. I was in college living with a family from our church for a year to help save room/board costs, and when I saw the mom feed her 9 year old daughter a mac and cheese dinner when the rest of the family enjoyed the real meal that she took the time to prepare, I vowed to NEVER fix separate meals for my childre. I have stuck with that, and I have 4 children ranging in age from 19-4(in Dec). They won't starve to death, if they don't eat what you put on their plates, cover it and when they complain that they are hungry, pull it out of the fridge, heat it, and offer it again. Eventually, they will figure out that they need to eat what mom fixes and they might even decide they like it, lol. I never force my kids to "clean their plates" either. I believe that can lead to obesity. I did, however, when they were little, but just a little on their plates and told them they had to take one bite for each year of their age. So when my son was 3 and insisted he didn't like roast, I told him to eat 3 bites and he didn't have to eat any more. He finished all that I gave him :-)
Something else you can do to make the "white" foods that he enjoys more heathy is use whole wheat pasta. My family loves whole grain spaghetti and has since I first started using it a couple years ago. Instead of buying the very high sodium mac and cheese dinners, buy whole grain macaroni, and add your own cheddar cheese sauce...healthier and tastier! If you make your own pizza crust, use whole wheat flour, you get the idea...my kids insist they don't like whole wheat bread, but unless it's all i have money for and we really need bread, I don't buy white bread. It just lacks the nutrition that whole grains have and I don't think it has the flavor.

Kids love to dip things so give him stuff to dip in. Whats so bad about ranch or ketchup or french onion or peanut butter dip as long as they get healthy food behind the dip. The only way I can get my son (also 20 months) to eat vegies is to serve them raw with ranch or peanut butter. He wont eat them cooked but if thats what it takes then thats how I serve them (when he knows Im serving him vegies I hide them in cooked foods). Use whole wheat pasta and bread and make sure its says whole wheat and not enriched wheat flower cause thats not whole wheat. This age is very tough and I made big mistakes with my first born at this age and she is so picky now and still only eats certain foods and Im determined not to do that again. Always offer new foods to him. If you go out to eat go to a buffet and offer everything on it in little portions, seriously, and let him touch and feel the foods too. Little kids like to play with new things and put things in their mouths thats how they learn and even though its messy it really helps to get them eating more foods. Also give a spoon and fork to him He wants to be like mom and dad and eat like you. Meals in my house involve striping down to the diaper and a spray down in the sink afterwards depending on the meal sometimes, other times just a wipe off but I always let him feed himself even cereal with milk or yogurt

I went through the very same thing with my son. He's now 6 and he's grown out of it I'm happy to say!
I wouldn't worry too much about it--BUT I would make sure what he does eat is the best quality. Considering getting the organic or natural alternatives to what he's eating and if he enjoys pancakes, make a lot of those :) Also--since he loves fruit, you could start making him some very healthy immune-boosting smoothies every day, which will really benefit him a lot and balance things out a bit. As long as he's eating regularly, I wouldn't worry about him being underweight. You are the best judge as to whether he's healthy enough and if he's thriving and full of energy otherwise--then he's fine :)

Here's a smoothie recipe that is awesome! My son's sinus problems are almost nil on it and colds are very mild when they do catch them :)

2-3 oz (per person) of POM brand pomegrante juice. pomegrante juice is extremely beneficial to the immune system!
1/2 cup frozen blueberries (also fantastic for the body!)
1/2 cup frozen fruit of choice
1 banana (I freeze a bunch of them to use at my leasure)
1/2 cup rice milk or organic milk of choice
water to taste (my kids like their smooties more watery than thick)

Best of Luck!
M.