HAH HA! I've got you now ;-)
When I first joined this site, I wasn't really that into it. I came looking for ideas to add to my kinship care toolbox. I came on during the roughest patch of my life (not exaggerating).
Then, it turned into a habit. Maybe not a healthy one, but it was another outlet and it helped me get through. My husband would roll his eyes and say, "back to your mamacrack, eh?" And yes. Yes I WAS.
Then things started to shift for me. I began a shift that's been incredible, like the floodgates to my heart have (finally) been released. I had been living in a swamp. Then, when the damn BROKE, it poured out and changed my landscapes. Thank God! It's been beautiful and painful.
This site has become a source of strength and is a healthy outlet (chuckle, chuckle...almost). I've gotten to see you all differently. I don't always see eye to eye with you all, and it's better that way. I get to disagree with you AND I get to see your tenderness. I can think someone is cold and damaging one day, and be proved wrong the next. I've learned a little about some of your stories, about how and why you think what you do, and that your heart is in the right place. We've all had pain and we've all had love.
We all come from different backgrounds. We're different ages, we have different experiences with our kids, we have different challenges. We belong to different faiths, nationalities, classes, races, sexual orientations, our relationships look different...there is a LOT different.
We also have a lot in common. For one, we have each other. We have a desire to connect, and to share our words. To be heard and seen by each other.
I've been honored to hear about your struggles and joys; about your shame and your freedom. I've gotten a lot from all of you, and in part, I get to always be reminded that we are all human; That we all go through some of the same internal stuff and that we all have fears, peace, grief, overwhelm, love...you know, we all have a heart. I get to know you all and if we met in real life, we might not share as much or as honestly.
That, and I've learned some fascinating information and great facts/theories!
So look. Sometimes we disagree. It's awesome, BECAUSE I can learn from you that way. I can actually check my agenda at the door and listen (well, at least SOME of the time).
So cheers to you mamapedia community. I don't always like what I read, but I like that I *get* to read it and I'm grateful that you get REAL with us.
So THERE! ;-)
Obligatory question: Do your friends and family know how hooked YOU are to this site? Are you embarrassed about how much you *actually* dig this site?
Well you seriously win MY vote for Mayor Of Mamapediaville!
:)
(I don't think I really NEED to answer the question, everybody knows I have no life!)
This is my own little "oasis."
Hubby knows I frequent Mommy sites. And respond to questions.
I don't go saying which site specifically.
Nor to my friends.
Again, this is my own little "oasis."
My own thing.
:)
Cheers to you!
Love the sentiments...well said!
My husband teases me often about my addiction :-) even if I don't answer (sometimes hard from my phone) I am on here reading questions all the time! I often mention things from here to friends but just say, "this mom forum that I'm on..."
Love this board!
Ephie, you gotta be one of the sweetest ladies on this site. And there sure are some sweet ones. Hugs to you, lady!
Dawn
Guilty as charged. In my defense, I do find a lot of good info on here that makes its way into my everyday life in practical ways. It's also a guilty pleasure of sorts AND things I read on here make for interesting after-dinner conversation with my hubby who finds the differing opinions amusing (or at least he fakes it well).
Hmmm, things I never knew before Mamapedia::
People buy, cook, and actually eat things like Hamburger Helper, spam & green peppers (ick) - who knew?
A lot of kids are picky eaters - my daughter is not one of them
No marriage is perfect no matter how "good" it looks to the outside world
My sex life/frequency is a little above normal (hubby likes this one)
My singleton daughter need not be condemned to a life of selfishness
My crazy extended family is actually pretty normal - again, who knew?
Many spouses keep different bedrooms and are happy
All in-laws are a little nuts, some more than others
Facebook is the devil and people need a filter
Not everyone knows the difference between its/it's, there/their, your/you're
The biggest problem in most marriages is selfishness
My husband is a gem - & I'm keeping him
Nobody can get through life without a little support - so thank you Mamapedia Moms for putting yourselves out there for the good of us all!
I echo Dawn B! Ephie, you are a jewel.
My husband knows how hooked I am, but NO ONE else knows ;)
I love the girls here.
Cheers!
It's been 4 or 5 years now. No. No one knows. I spend a lot of time writing on my puter. WHERE I'm writing, very few people are interested in. YES, it drives me nuts how much I'm on here. I periodically take breaks. Enforced or otherwise (enforced = as in I block the site in my parental controls, so I don't log on out of habit before coffee). I'm trying "otherwise" right now. See how successful I am at it? Sheesh.
Other people's problems get me out of my own. Other people's challenges HELP me with a gazillion great ideas for my own problems. Stories about my son remind me of things I'd otherwise have forgotten. I love it here. I'd love it more if some structural problems were fixed, but I doubt that will happen as it functions, and altering things is just hands down expensive
No one knows how much I like this site except you ladies.
I went back to the 1st of August and I have about 1000 flowers. That means I have about about 16,000 flowers since I got involved here back in May 2010.
Interesting question.
Good luck to you and yours.
Lol! Yes they do!
I really hope you are taking your writing seriously, because its amazing! I truly enjoy reading everything you write. Your intelligence and strength are inspiring. Thank you for being you!
P.S. When having a conversation with someone, I say "Oh well I heard this really works". They say "Where did you hear that?" Me- "Um, well, uh...this girl told me, or I looked it up online!" Geez get off my back!
You mean we are supposed to tell others what we do all day?
You are so eloquent. Yes, I am obviously hooked and everybody knows..
My family used to roll their eyes, now when I have a reaction.. they ask, "What did they say, why are you laughing?"
"Uh Oh, who is having problems now, you sound concerned?"
Or "Oops someone is about to have a talking to you sound put out. "
They give me their opinions and I do share them on here with all of you.
Hi Elphie
What I love the most about this site is the intellience of the women here.
I would be very bored and long gone if it were like most of the other cyber communities out there.I love the layout of the site,the interesting characters and as I said above the intelligence of the questions and responses. I like that I am constantly learning and growing during my time here.
The funny thing is I am not a computer peron.I am naturally a hippy and spend my spare time meditating,being in nature,doing healings etc. I used to loathe computers and would only use them when needed at work.
Friends found it strange when I started dating my hubby at first. We were so opposite in terms of him being a computer nerd.
When we moved in together a few years ago he set up a facebook account for me which I rarely looked at.
Then approx 2 yrs ago my friend sent me a suggestion for Mamapedia site. I came to have a look and the rest is history LOL
I am not embarrassed about saying I spend alot of time here but my friends would be surprised to see me in my hubby's office in the house in the evening engrossed on here.
My hubby has even set me up with my own desk and computer as I was hogging his too much.
Thanks for lovely post Elphie
x B. k
Aww Ephie. Gimme a hug!
Q: My husband knows I'm hooked. My mom and MIL and friends often hear "Well on my mom's website last week . . . ." or "Well this gal from my mom's website said . . . . " I am not embarassed by how much time I spend on here. It is extremely addicting though. I didn't get real addicted and involved till my son was 2 or so. (He's now 3). I don't do FB or any other sites, so I figure spending my time on here really isn't that bad.
yep, i'm always telling my husband about my mamapedia adventures. and thanks for this post, you are so awesome!!!!!!!
Hugs!
I have been on the site for awhile. But I got addicted while recovering from surgery earlier this year. Know one knows--except y'all!
I just have to say that I enjoy reading your questions so much, you write so well. :)
And no, no one has any idea how addicted I am. I hide it well!
I'm thoroughly convinced I don't spend as much time here as I really do...but I do know you rock! I also love it on here when people who seem nuts at first are actually nice :) Sometimes I wonder how weird it would be to meet up in person outside of our cyber world and be like, "Yoooooou're So and So?!? Wow!" :)
My husband always asks, "Anything good on Mamapedia going on?" (good as in crazy)
My immediate living under the same roof family know of my addiction.
My outside family doesn't know and I pray they never do, I tell things to my Mama friends I would never admit to my "family"
Not so much embarrassed...just do not want to be called out for anything I may have typed!
= )
It has been a good place for me too...I am very thankful for mamapedia.
HOW NICE!!! And funny too!! My husband calls it mamacrack as well!!!!
What I like is that I've learned soo much from other mom's here...
I joined because one of my GFs had loved it soo much - then got turned off and hasn't come back...
I've recommended it to my cousin and my sister - but my sister hasn't joined! AAAAHHHH the stories she could share!! And it would be scary too because where I'm conservative - she's a Libertarian!! YIKES!!! :)
But overall - I love this site. There are a few bad apples - but you get those any where you go!!!
My husband knows about this site, but I don't think he knows the frequency I visit. I also know for sure how much of my heart goes into what I write. When I answer questions, I try to put as honest and kind a response as I can. I think in the long run, it helps me. It helps me by being heard. My voice, as well as every person on here, deserves to be heard. It validates me. Most of the time I'm not even thinking about that, though. Most of the time I answer if the poster has moved me in some way. A lot of times, I end up typing through tears. I try to put my heart out there as much as I can. That makes it tricky. I've been stomped on a few times. That also makes me wary of sticking my neck out there. I've had to reel in a few of my questions out of fear. And I don't like that.
But I do like that in some little way, I may have shared something that has touched someone else. That's my hope anyway. I hope I can help.
Thank you Ephie!!! :-))
I love the fact that there are so many ideas and opinions on Mamapedia. I love the fact that in most cases we have broken down the walls of bigotry and we accept each other for who we are. We have become a sisterhood.
My husband says, "Why don't you ask your mom's group?".
When I first joined, over 5 years ago, we even had a meetup at a local Chuck e Cheese of about 10 ladies. Pretty neat.
Sometimes I go and check my flowers and I see someone left one 2 minutes ago. I think, "Lady, go to bed it's 1am!!!" Then I'm like... "Oh, wait, maybe I should go to bed!" ;)
Thanks, I like what you had to say. I agree. And yes, my husband and children tease me about mamapedia all the time.
Troy thinks it is funny, well most of the time. I think he secretly fears he could be standing there naked and I would be, just have to finish this thought. :p
I ask him questions sometimes to make sure I am translating men properly. Sometimes just to make him laugh. So yeah they know.
I agree that for the most part this is a great community. I only wish more people understood that disagreement is a learning opportunity not an attack on your beliefs.
Oh, and I still love reading anything you write! :)
My F&F aren't aware of my work-day obsession & I feel no guilt what-so-ever.
Flowers to your post!!!
I am pretty hooked on this site, although I go through phases. Sometimes I'm on here all of the time (usually when I'm procrastinating about something. Like now....we just moved and most of the big stuff is unpacked. I am avoiding the rest of it like the plague because it's going to take some serious thought to figure out where it should all go!), and other times, I might check it once per week or so. I've been on here for 5 years or so and I have always thought it a great resource.
As I was reading through some of the other responses, someone mentioned an app for this site. My first thought was "an APP?? How did I not know about this??". I checked the app store on my iPhone, but didn't see one. Anyone know what platforms have the app? Of course, if I actually find one for my phone, I will NEVER get anything done! LOL!
You ladies are great! Hope you have a great day!
Well said, sweetie!
I only discovered this site a couple of months ago, when I was totally frazzled, frustrated and consumed by an issue and I was getting nowhere in my efforts to resolve it. One quick, "why not" posting on here and within about an hour I had 39 insightful and reasoned responses to MY issue...plus a plan of action. Jackpot! I felt listened to, taken seriously and challenged (I didn't agree with some of the responses at first, but they were just what I needed to see the situation with a fresh perspective - and then take action!). So yes, I'm hooked.
This site offers the support, contact and wisdom of lifelong friendships, in a manner that matches every mom's busy schedule. (I've already interrupted this post to rescue 4 frogs from our window well, change a diaper and respond to three texts). So thank YOU all for the breath of fresh air...and Ephie for this opportunity to say it. :D
:o) I send you a flower for your question!!
My hubby and kids will ask "What do the M.'s say?"
My daughter has even answered a couple of the teen questions.
She will also correct me if she thinks I am giving you wrong information, about teens in general, high school, etc.
I find I do have to limit my time, or I'd be here all day. I also find that I refresh the page just to see who else is on.
Have a great day mamas!!!
You know what, if you were here...I would give you a great big hug! You did a wonderful job articulating the way I feel about this board! My husband, sister and only 2 of my best buds know about my mamapedia addiction/connection. I have ALOT of friends that wouldn't get it and would ask how in the world I find the time...
Bless your heart!
XO
My husband thinks it's funny how much I love "mamacrack" (btw, I love your term for it - so accurate! LOL)
I've actually met several "real life" friends here on this site. I think that's a pretty fantastic and special thing.
Love this site! You're all wonderful!
YES!
And my hub and house mate are secretly jealous.
I am not embarrassed about this site.I reference you all and some of your situations all the time...as if we were good friends that actually see each other.
My youngest kiddo's OT thinks that this site sounds amazing. The fact I have been able to reach out for support with my Sensory kiddo is awesome...I know that I am not living with a kiddo that is hard...alone...There are plenty of other's out there to relate to my life.
I dont give the site out to people I know...I do this to protect my privacy.
I respond as honestly as I possibly can....and the truth about me to people that know me...may really hurt some of them(like my older sister....If she found out I had had an abortion which i have talked of on here....she would just be crushed...I could not do that to her).
They know of the site and I reference it iften....I just always hope that no one goes...wow can I get that site....I did however pass the site off to a FB friend of mine....She lives in Alabama....she is a game ''Friend''...she has s daughter my age with a new kiddo....So I thought she would get alot outta this place...Dont know if she ever joined...but It was safe enough for me!
I used to feel silly about the site.
I didnt admit I was addicted...then I didnt care...and now I am happy you guys are here.
I have made many a friend here...including you. My life is a much brighter place because of my dear friends here...and wish someday we could meet if only for a moment...So, I can tell you all face to face how much you mean to me!!
Thank You sweet Ephie...This was the best way to start the First day of 1st grade...Something sweet and Positive!!
Happy Thursday to you mama!
O yes my hubby knows how much I love this site it's bookmarked and I have an app for it lol and when we are talking about something out of the ordinary or where we dnt agree he tells me "go ask on mamapedia" lol I love this site as you can see if you look at all the questions I've asked lol ima 1st time mommy and everyone one on here has been so helpful I wish I could send real fresh flowers to everyone in real life. :)
Oh and when talking about topics on here to someone I kno thy ask where did you hear that well I say "oh on mamapedia" :)
And I agree with everyone who said you write so well. :))
LOL you are so funny and have expressed what I have felt many times. I feel like I know so many but have never met anyone.
My hubby knows and 2 coworker know do mamacrack...I never get on at home because I dont have time and our computer crashed a few months ago BUT I will be taking 7 days off in October for minor outpatient surgery and made sure my hubby will let me use his work laptop so I can keep up while im off work.
I have been trying to limit when I come on because it was becoming very consumming and so now I check maybe once an hr or every so often during the day.
Oh Ephie ~
You have such a way with words! I look forward to your questions and answers b/c you never cease to make me smile!!
No, nobody knows about my crazy addiction. I even gave it up for Lent this past Spring b/c I was out of control! I've only been here for a year and a half or so.
I am one of those that go way back to the Mamasource days, too. Probably been around here for about six years. Like some of the others, my activity goes up and down, I will spend a few months of heavy hanging out and then several where I am barely on the site. I have experienced a lot of highs and lows with Mamapedia over the years. Probably the best was back in September 2008, we found our selves in a very sudden and terrible medical crisis with my then three year old son Bryce. From the waiting room for the PICU at Dallas Childrens Medical Center, I logged on to this site seeking desperately for prayers because Bryce was barely alive and his prognosis was very grave. The love and support I received that day and in the coming weeks and months from over 200 of these mamas was nothing short of a divine blessing so needed in my worst time. The lows have been more about people's different situations, some have been so terrible as well as the too numerous to count mean, rude and downright hateful comments to those seeking support. There have been so many times that I wish I had a stronger backbone because there have been a handful of women over the years I would like to have really let have it :-) I think what I most miss about the "old days" is how we were more grouped by region. I personally liked interacting and getting to really know women that were in my general area. Sometimes I wonder if that is the cause of some of the friction? Do people tend to have more tendencies towards bluntness if the are from certain areas? My old next door neighbors in Texas were from the Bronx and oh my goodness, the screaming and insulting fights the would have in their front yard, including their small son. When talking to Linda about it, she said that's how it is where she comes from. Families fight and insult daily but no one takes it too seriously, they move on. Being from the south, it's just not like that. Usually above all, politeness comes first, even when delivering criticism. So that's been a wee bit tough for me and why I sometimes need to take breaks from this glorious place :-) Anyway, what great words you gave us all to ponder today....we women are truly a unique and passionate lot, that's for sure!
Love, love, love what you wrote. I hope everyone reads this post! I don't always agree with everyone but I firmly respect their opinions. After all, we have them due to our experiences.
My husband knows about "my mommy group"...he doesn't know the name nor will he ever. Not because I'm ashamed but as someone said below..."this is my oasis". This is my place I can come to and feel like I'm not being judge all the time, that even if I have a difference in opinion/belief from someone else that there is someone out there listening. Not hearing, not just reading but listening.
I probably get more out of answering questions than I do asking them. Usually I come on to ask a question an BAM...it's already here! Some of of you are just way more pyschic than I!
Thanks Ephie for writing this.
I have been on here for a couple of years and I do enjoy it. No one really knows that I am on here though, although my hubby thinks it's weird :) I actually have another group I post with and have since I was pregnant with my youngest. It is a due date club and I have met some of the moms (hubby thinks this is even weirder) But it's hard being a mom sometimes and I think that the internet is a great outlet when we can't always get it out in real life :) Thanks for posting this.
What sweet words :) and so true. It's great to share and connect with other moms. Especially when you're a younger, first-time mom like me that doesn't have a lot of friends or other moms nearby. I have been on here for about a year and I am SO hooked! My husband loves it too, whenever I have a question, he says "go ask your moms!" -- and I'll ask a question and we'll sometimes read the answers together. I agree, even the answers that make me mad and I may not disagree with, make me think. It's great to share our commonalities as well as our differences. :) CHEERS TO ALL THE MOMMAS!
Hi ephie!
Yep this is my crack :) I just can't stay away
I love to see how others think or would handle things. I am a sahm with no friends and no money to blow. I joined a year ago trying to find a dentist for my baby and found the best Dentist on earth! I've been hooked ever since! I feel I have friends and I can ask y'all anything and get honest answers. I love to hear what your life is like ans where you live and what y'all eat, ya know, im a little nosey! My husband says to get off the damn mamapedia and talk to him :) I log on from my phone so im not actually sitting all day! Ill talk to him later :) I tell no one about this site! Its mine!
Ephie that was so nice! I always enjoy reading what you write, you always put things so beautifully.
And yes, my husband makes fun of me too for the amount of time I spend on here! Shameful!
I love this site... I love how it makes me think about situations I have yet to encounter, and it makes me put down in words the lessons I have already learned! I love to see how a world full of different women can be SO diverse, but still share the common trait of trying our hardest to do what is best for our kids.
Oh, and my husband laughs when I rant about some of the terrible and fantastic things I hear you all say (not telling who said what hahahaha!)
-M.
That was beautiful, Ephie, and I agree with every word....except neither my hubby nor anyone else (besides you ladies and gent) know of my insane Mamapedia addiction.
amen! i go through periods of absences and periods of obsessively checking but at the end of the day, i LOVE this site :)
