Twin Due Dates and Things People Ask

I have found that moms of multiples are really sensitive to all the weird questions because they must get them all the time. I prob. have and prob. will ask some dumb question to a mom of multiples - I just hope I am not hated to much.

It might make you feel better if you give really off the wall answers to their questions. Like "How are you going to handle taking care of them" Say "I'm not, we have two full time live in nanny's, I will be spending my time at the club"

Congrats! That is so exciting. A very funny friend of mine, when someone asked her, "What are you having?" would say, "A litter of kittens!" It never failed to stop the questions in their tracks!

With due dates, I think you should choose what you want. If you're having them at 37 weeks, that is a due date too:-) So, it would be accurate.

With all the questions, people can be so opinionated at times and feel the need to share their feelings with other people. Maybe you can think of short and sweet answers to their questions. Such as the "how are you going to handle taking care of them", you can just say "the best we can" or something simple. If they say "do they have the same dad" - just stare them down until they walk away or tell them that you are not part cat. (I can't believe people ask that!).

Or maybe you can practice changing the subject if they get too personal. You shouldn't have to defend yourself! But some people really make you feel that way. Hopefully other people will have better suggestions.

As for having a big belly, I can sort of relate. I have not had twins, but my 2nd child was almost 11 lbs. I'm small (under 120 lbs at 5 ft 4 in when not prego), and so my belly was HUGE. I measured 43 weeks when I was only 38 weeks. I was literally bigger than some of the mommas pregnant with twins that I knew (which made it worse since I only had one baby). People stared at me like I was about to explode if I went in public. It got old telling people how far along I was and seeing their shocked faces...hehe.

Mostly just letting things roll off of you is the best advice. People will be people and will say thoughtless things (I hope I don't do this to other people!). Don't take it too personal.

Hope the pregnancy goes well!!
PS: So, do the babies have the same dad?

i told people when my scheduled c-section was. friends and family knew the actual due date vs. the date of my section. sounds like our kiddos might have birthdays close together. my twins are 9 months old now. their actual due date was Dec 9th and my OB did my c-section at 38 weeks so they were born Nov. 24th. Their first birthday will fall on Thanksgiving this year.

people would always say, "are they natural twins or did you take fertility drugs?" really, like it's any of your business???? and of course they have to ask, "do twins run in your family?" and "wow, bet you wish you had your twins first huh?" like I would ever change having had my oldest son....my twins just happened, we didnt do fertility treatments, and twins do run heavily on my moms side. Congratulations on your bundles of joy!!!!

ps....and I hated when people would ask how was I going to handle it. My MIL, for months, kept talking about how she needed to have a list of people prepared before I had the boys because I was going to have to have someone with my 24 hours a day because I had no clue what it was going to be like or how hard it would be. she actually told me once that I wouldnt be able to take care of them myself while my husband was working....laughs on her though, 9 months later and we are all still doing fantastic, house is taken care of and I do it all without having her or anyone else with me, I refused to let her make her "list". I never had people coming over to help me out, the church ladies brought meals over the first 2 weeks though so that was awesome, but as far as having someone over with me to help me, nope. aaarrrggghhhh, some people huh!!! LOL

Just tell them they will get here when they are good and ready! I am a twin and 32 years ago they didn't do sonograms so my mom didn't know there was 2 of us ( never heard 2 heartbeats). My birthday is in january and and mom went xmas shopping and some lady told her she was having twins
My mom cried and cried! Bless her heart she was huge! Then whatcha know! Three weeks later twin girls! Good luck with everything dear!

I was HUGE with our twins. I gained 75 pounds!!! I went on bedrest at 28 weeks and one day we had to go to the hospital. We had to use a wheelchair and people kept saying stuff like, Congratulations on your delivery! Good luck! It went on and on and I finally told someone I still had 2 months to go. OMG, her expression was hilarious!!!
All the questions didn't bother me but I was never asked if they had the same dad. THAT would bother me!! I would just look at them like their nuts and walk away.
Get ready! If you think you get a lot of questions now, just wait till they are born. People would actually stand in front of my cart at the store to look at my girls and ask a ton of questions. The first was always, Are they twins? I also heard a MILLION times, Oh, you have your hands full! That one started to annoy me because it was like they were saying I had more than I could handle. I thought I was doing pretty good with a 2 yo and infant twins. I was never rude but I did learn some short, quick answers that I would tell people as I rolled away. :)

HONESTLY, YOU'VE HAD SOMEONE ASK YOU IF THEY HAVE THE SAME DAD????? Did you hit this person?

Twins are always a bit of a curiosity but if you don't want to answer a bunch of questions, especially if they are stuipd ones!!! Say I've really got to run, or I hear my cell phone, or something and get away from them.

Take care of you and yours!!

I suggest that you can just smile and not say anything sort of as if you didn't hear them. This should cause them to think about their question and realize it's inappropriate. This has happened to me, as a questioner.

I don't think it's rude to just say it's personal.

I delivered my twin boys a month early! Thank God! That is normal for twins.
Twins are a blessing, enjoy this time. Who cares what others say or think.My twins are best friends and I think it's easier with them because they always have each other to play with.
ENJOY!

I am in the same boat but for a slightly different reason. I have only half a uterus. Both my previous pregnancies ended early (31 wks and 34 wks). So this time around my midwife and I think I MAYBE have a chance to make it to the mid 30s...I plan to tell people "anytime AFTER such and such date. " I've officially said it will be after 36 weeks but I will move it closer to the due date IF/WHEN we make it that far. I think the way you're saying it works. And it isn't their business that there are two of them in there! :)

My sister just found out at 22 weeks that she's having twins!!! Her 8week u/s only showed one - the other one was hiding :)

She's a thin girl with a short torso, so when she started showing at 6 weeks we all just assumed there was no room for the baby to grow but *out*. Then she gained 30 pounds in 4.5 months and looked about 7 months. Now that we know what's what, it all makes sense :)

I don't know what to tell people, but *I'm* happy for you! Just laugh off stupid questions with a smile and carry on your merry way :)

You are so nice :) I have 13 year old twins, and the questions don't stop! I tried to be nice, but after a while, it got really hard. If/when someone says, "wow, I'm glad it's you and not me" I started to reply, "me, too!" with a big smile. When you don't want to answer, just look surprised and say, "wow, that's personal!" and move onto more general topics. Good luck. Twins are such a blessing!

Hi E.,

Congrats on your babies!!! Be as brief as possible and only give info that you feel comfortable sharing. Some people have no problem asking the down and dirty questions--that doesn't mean that you have to answer! Tell them if you want, the end of November etc. If they get pushy or too nosy, say --I don't feel comfortable with that or Why do you want to know??? It usually is enough to stop them. Enjoy your pregnancy and forget about the rest! GL

M

A just for fun answer.Tell people that ask they twins have the same dad,"that there is three mothers,but no dad".
My 21 year old daughter and her friends came up with that after my daughter had gained some weight,all in her belly. She is now three months along. LOL

I think you should tell them whatever date you feel like. I had twin boys and told people my 40 week due date but then added "twins normally come quicker". But... I went to 41 weeks and had to be induced to get these boys out!! LOL. I was as big as a house. And I also got all those annoying questions. I just tried to take them as kindly as I could because it didn't seem to matter what I said, everyone felt the need to give me their comments. It still hasn't really changed, and the boys are 6 now. It is a rare occasion when a stranger will pass me and say "Twins! What a blessing!!" And trust me, it really is. Congratulations to you and the babies!

I nearly got tee shirts printed up I got so sick of the questions!!
Join your local multiples support group - they will be such a help....

congrats on the twins!
Tell people whatever sounds good to you at the moment. My twins are 1 and I still get asked are they twins? Are they natural? What fertility did you use? Do they run in your family? and my favorite are they identical? - I have boy/girl twins so I used to think I would never get asked that one but I was so wrong. Somedays I dont mind chatting but there are other days that I have no patience for questions. And I am just curious what did you tell the idiot that asked you if they had the same dad? Thats one question I dont think I have ever been asked.

It's not rude not to want to disclose you rpersonal info to strangers. They are the rude ones for insisting on knowing. I would tell them the actual 40-week due date and just move on.

First of all I want to congrat you and your better half on the new members of you family.
I will just tell people that ask you when they are to arive, It's in Gods Hands.And just walk away. AS for your minister He should be giving you this advise.
All Children are a Blessing from God no matter how the world is.
Just keep the faith and everything will be ok.

Whenever a person has a " not the norm " circumstance, people say stupid S***. I have a child with special needs , 3 boys, & a 7 yr gap between kids & I get wierd questions and comments all the time, on all of those subjects. I even get comments by medical professionals, that you think should know better. You'll get used to it and so will your kids , as they get older and people start asking them stupid stuff.

Keep positive and tell people how excited you are to have twins. Your excitement should be contagious. People say dumb stuff...

My friend gave super out there answers to peoples questions.
How are you going to take care of them? - "Wait....you mean you have to take them home with you from the hospital......BOTH of them???"
Did you take fertility drugs? - "Does being abducted by aliens count?"
Stuff like that, lol.
Good Luck to ya! =)