TV Watching Rules

I never really stress on the TV thing, personally. My younger sisters watched SO much TV, all sesame street, but they were addicted and watched for several hours a day. They are two of the smartest kids I know (twins, in their 20's now) Way more mature and motivated than your typical college student and always getting straight A's at their UC school. I'm about ten years older than them so I remember how much Sesame Street was on at the house, and many of the same videos over and over.

We never had limits on TV growing up, so I am just pretty lax about it- I agree that it is not the best way to spend an afternoon. But I also just don't believe it's something that needs "rules" attached to it. I am not SO involved in TV myself (we have the basic cable, no direct TV or DVR or any of that stuff, and I barely watch it, especially while my kid's awake, who has time?)... so I think modeling that TV is not a huge deal, and it's not life-or-death to miss certain shows, will help the kids follow suit as they grow up.

So, I think it's more about WHAT is being watched, and it sounds like you let him watch age-apprpriate stuff. As far as how much is appropriate, I just use my instincts... you can tell when it's time to turn it off and get moving, play a boardgame, do a project or something. And you can tell when it's time to let your kid mellow out for a half hour with a playhouse disney show or barney video or whatever. To be honest, dinner would not ever get made if I didn't let my 2 y/o watch a 1/2 hour of something in the early evening.
Just try to save it for when it's needed and make sure it's only good stuff they can learn something from.
You sound like a mom who knows what's up, I wouldn't worry about it too much.

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Hi M.,

I personally, am a TV hater. Yes, I watch a show or two, but I think this awful invention has reduced our capacity for literacy, family, civic and community involvement, our attention spans, our critical thinking skills. It has increased the ability of "authorities" and "experts" to manipulate us and sell us ideas or things that are not in our best interest. I try to model VERY limited TV watching.
I end up policing my husband much more than my child...who rarely asks to watch much of anything.

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TV is a mind candy. TV will do for the growing brain what the sugar does to the body. if you would not give him one don't give him another.
Good Luck
V.

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Hi M.,

It sounds to me that you already have the right perspective on things! You realize that there needs to be limits set on it and that you also need to use your parental instincts to know what those limits should be. And they may be different from day to day and from child to child.

We actually don't have tv in our house, but I do let my daughters (2 and 4) watch videos on my laptop. We check out different things from the library. Sometimes educational videos, sometimes sing-alongs, and sometimes things just for entertainment.

Most often, I use the videos when I need to take a shower, but also sometimes sit and watch with them if we all just need to lay low for a little bit. I usually limit to one video and then insist that they go play.

I think that it's like most things -- moderation and balance and using your judgment as to what is right for your family and kids!

M.

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M., I have always restricted what my girls watch. They are now 11 and 8. When they were younger we only watched a few shows on Disney and Nick Jr. We watched a lot of HGTV and Food Network. Still to this day we watch more cable channels like Travel, Discovery and Science than network shows. I still won't let them watch something I have never seen. I guess I am sort of over protective but there is so much awful stuff on TV and I want my kids to stay kids as long as they can. If you start out when they are young and continue it, they will never know that isn't how other kids watch TV.

I've also hear that tv is not good. But I let my daughter who is two watch about an hour a day. I have guilt, but she loves it and seems to learn from it. We splurged a little at Christmas with the Christmas cartoons, so she got a little more these last two months than I'm comfortable with. Also I've learned to use the dvd in the car just to ride in peace for trips that are longer than 30 min. I'm not saying I won't regret the screen time, but boy, does it make for some peace. I'm answering because I felt like posting the same question. I used to judge those parents who used tv as a babysitter, but here I am doing the same thing so I can get something done! Sometimes we even use let her watch something in the morning so we can be intimate or sleep! Its such a guilty pleasure for everyone!

My daughter just turned five. This has been our strategy since she was about your son's age. She picks one pre-tivo'ed 30 minute show per day (or one episode of a show on live tv, eg). Our daughter can choose to watch it whenever she'd like. If she's sick or there are extremely extenuating circumstances she gets to watch more. Once a week we do a movie night- all of us, together (with popcorn!). Works great for us! She gets her tv fix (after all, don't we watch tv as adults), but it doesn't creep into time she can spend doing more creative play and activities. When we first implemented this strategy it was hard for her because I'd been more lax, allowing two or even three shoes per day. But it was WELL worth it. Solved a lot of our behavioral issues around tv too. We wanted to change tv to be something fun, instead of a substitute for something else.

One or two hours a day is fine. My girls are older now and very smart, they learned a lot from educational shows, but I didn't let them watch too much. I also played with them a lot, but it was nice to let them watch sometimes so I could get some things done! If you don't like what's on TV, get some videos that you like for them.

I never had a problem with a few hours of tv a day. One show in the afternoon and one for the evning for bed. The rest of the time he really needs to be using his imagination. Using toys like blocks and puzzles as well as out side time weather permitting so he can run around. My daughter was never able to take long naps though so all the power to you.

They learn more from books, playgroups, library story times and craft groups, parks & rec Mommy & Me classes.... As a teacher I say no TV before the age of 2 and after that about 30min per WEEK. The light patterns.... changes... are NOT good for their eye and brain dev. and connections. Makes it diff to track when learning to read..................

I hate that my 2.5yr old son watches TV but I watch it at night and my husband watches it at night. I grew up with a TV in my room. I'm fine - really! Didn't go brain dead or anything! Anyway - the way we monitor TV for my son is with the DVR. We record the shows that I think are educational or that he really enjoys. He never asks to watch TV, he asks for a specific show and when it is over, it pauses and doesn't go on to more TV. After the show pauses, he gets up and plays. When he isn't feeling 100% or is tired, he sometimes says, can I watch (names a different show) too? Just an idea - it works well for us. Good luck!

I have notice that if you let them watch to much t.v. it has an addictive effect. My dd was sick so we pretty much let her watch whatever she wanted and it was VERY hard to break her of the habit. I limit her t.v. to when I need to do something for work (I am a Realtor and work from home), if I need to shower, or make something to eat, I will also put on a show for her. She gets upset sometimes still when I turn it off, but I distract her with Playdo, coloring books, Little People, or some other toy she likes. I know it may seem they are learning alot from it, but the bottom line is if it is direct reaction with you instead, they learn ALOT more. Notice that sometimes they kind of zone out with the t.v. I am all for mama getting a break once in a while, but just make sure they are not addicted to it, then it becomes a problem. I have friends who don't have strict limits with it and they have to tear their screaming children away from the t.v. to get them to go anywhere, even if it is outside to play. Once they prefer t.v. to normal healthy activities I think it is time to cut back or get rid of it alltogether. My dd turned 2 in December just so you have reference. Good luck to you.

LOL Sorry, just had to comment on some of the responses. I say anything in moderation is okay. Some people are so extreme. It brought to mind a friend of mine who says they NEVER let their kid watch t.v. yet I hear the all to familiar sound of Elmo's world in the background getting lowered everytime I call her and she also says "Oh I would never give my kid juice, it is horrible for them", only to find out their child has a two time a day Otter Pop addiction!?!?!?? I think sometimes the extremist make others feel bad for some harmless t.v. only because they know what they REALLY do when no one is looking. Sorry, just had to say that. We are all human, not perfect, need a break sometimes and anyone who says they can just spend endless hours on end entertaining a two year old without a break???? My dd watches the "dreaded mind numbing tv" sometimes and she is EXTREMELY intelligent. She started using 6 to 7 word sentences when she was around 20 months old. If that is what a little moderated t.v. does I say bring it on! : )

When my daughter was your son's age, she was allowed 30 minutes before bedtime. Now that she is 5, she is not allowed tv Monday through Thursday. On the weekends, she is allowed to turn the tv(channel is set on something appropriate) on when she gets up so my husband and I can sleep in(about an hour)and then at night, she can watch a movie. She has learned to entertain herself with something other than tv. She is reading at a 2nd grade level, so I always have books for her to ammuse herself.

Hope that helps.

N.

Hi M.,

I let my little girl watch an hour in the morning of educational cartoons and a half hour before bed if she seems cranky. Otherwise we try to keep her busy with books and games. It's okay to watch a little tv, just not hours on end. Shows should be educational and fun, nothing too exciting that may upset your little guy.