Thoughts on Writting a Birth Plan?

Get an idea together of what you want and what you don't...but it will not go according to your plan perfectly.

And I will warn you...your labor nurse is your lifeline in the whole process...make nice and make friends with her. She does this everyday, multiple times a day and has seen it all.

My first was induced so any plan I had went right out the window as soon as the contractions hit full force...and I told my doctor no episeotomy...he said no problem. After pushing for 2.5 hours and him having to leave for an emergency c-section, he asked if I wanted one and my son could be out in less than 5 minutes I agreed. I would have agreed if he told me he needed to pull that baby out of my nose.

My second was a natural labor no induction. I went in very clear, epidural as soon as possible and go from there. After wards the nurse confided in me that she was so glad i was not one of those poster sized written birth plan women. She said she dreaded their labors because most of the time they would not allow any intervention even when needed and ended up with emergency c-sections 9 times out of 10.

Know what you want but be flexible!!

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I agree with the other moms - it's a good idea to think about what you want and how you would like things to go, but you have to go into it knowing that anything can and might happen! Don't be so set in your birth plan that you set yourself up for disappointment if everything doesn't go as you planned. I have a friend who wrote this long birth plan based around natural childbirth. She and her husband had it all planned - water birth, massage, aromatherapy, etc. Well, she went into labor and decided at 2cm to get an epidural. She was SO disappointed with this! Honestly, who cares how you get there as long as you end up with a healthy baby and you are healthy. Just be flexible and do what feels right at the time.

All that said, I wish that I had been very clear with my doctor during my first delivery that I did not want an episiotomy unless my baby's life or my own life was in danger. Things were going along just fine, I'd been pushing for 10 minutes, and he goes and does an episiotomy because HE WAS LATE FOR A DINNER RESERVATION! I mean, seriously! No warning or discussion, just SNIP! Ugh. It took forever to heal, and was super painful. So I wish I'd made that clear to him, but I guess I was under the impression that doctors don't do episiotomies anymore. Live and learn. The second time around I changed doctors and made sure to address that issue with him, and made clear that if he was going to do any cutting of any kind (or breaking my water, or whatever), that I wanted to be consulted first and that I may or may not want to go ahead with it unless not doing so could cause medical problems for me or the baby. This way, I had some control over what was happening, but was flexible enough to let things progress in a way that made sense to me while I was in labor.

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Finding out the procedures of the doctor and hospital where you're having your baby is a great thing to do. Having a birth plan will pretty much guarentee you will be disappointed when it doesn't go the way you envisioned it. You can never know how labor and delivery will go and what your doctor may have to do to ensure a safe delivery for your baby and you. Make sure you have all your questions answered before you go into labor and then just enjoy the experience without worrying about having to follow a plan. Congratulations and good luck!

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We wrote our birth plan with my OB. Check with your hospital b/c mine had an outline that really helped. The doctor talked us through it and we all signed off on the end. One copy was in my hospital file and we had the other.

I would say that a birth plan was helpful in that it forced us to sit down and actually talk about the various options for mobility, pain medication and nursing. The only thing that my doctor made clear was that we would play by "my rules" as long as the labor process was "typical". If something went wrong, he asked that I respect his discretion and go with the necessary steps.

In the end, I had a prolapsed chord and an emergency c-section. My doctor is very funny and wrote "shot to hell" across our draft. Good luck!

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It cannot hurt to write one, but you and your hubby (or whomever your support system is) should be prepared to stray from it if necessary. I know with my "plan", I wanted to have a natural birth, and I told my hubby to do everything in his power to dissuade me from epidural. Well, when the time came, I got an epidural at 9 cm. He did everything he could, but it made me angry at him that he wasn't listening to me, and he felt like a failure because he wasn't able to keep his promise to me. So, if we both would have had a less strict idea about our birth plan, things might have gone more smoothly.

Things I suggest along with a birth plan are tours of the hospital, with extensive questions directed toward the staff/doctor regarding their policies...ie as you mentioned above, eating, walking around, number of people allowed in birthing room, etc.

Just be prepared for things to happen that are beyond your control and not in your birth plan. You should be fine!

- BEST WISHES!

I had a discussion with my Dr a few weeks before I was due. I told him it would be nice not to have a C-section, but the object was to have as healthy baby as possible and if any emergencies came up, just do what you have to do. We were fortunate not to have anything unexpected pop up.

Our doula helped us create and tape up a birth plan (so that the nurses could see it) that had nothing to do with dim lights or classical music. It was more like, "Please give us 15 minutes to hold our new baby before taking him away to give him eye drops or do the heel prick... as long as he is healthy and waiting 15 minutes is safe."

Nothing silly about that :)

I had a birth plan, reviewed it with my doctor and was all ready for having the baby when... oops.. nothing went according to the plan. No ones fault, it just wasn't meant to happen perfectly or even close to what I had in mind. However, that being said, I would suggest that you research, talk to your doctor and visit the hospital and be knowledgeable so that when you have to make decisions, you can ask intelligent questions and make an informative decision. I thought that I would be scared going into the hospital, but because I did a lot of research I actually felt very prepared even though nothing happened the way I expected.

Also, here is one example of something I was happy to know and make a decision on. My hospital liked to keep the newborns in the nursery with the other babies. We asked that our baby stay with us at all times and that one of us would always be with her if she left our room.

Writing a birth plan is like making plans for travel. You may not have any control over whether or not the plane leaves on time or the airport is fogged in when you arrive, but you still make plans before you leave.

The point of this free workshop is to know what your options are and how to write a birth plan that will be read and respected. There's no point in asking for dim lights or music, or in telling the staff your plans for laboring at home! But there are so many procedures at a birth that can be avoided just by knowing your options ahead of time!

Using the travel analogy, imagine if you decided before your trip that your travel agent would do what was best for you. Now imagine you told her or him that you wanted to pay as little as possible for the trip. How would you feel, while sitting at an airport during a 6 hour layover, if you learned that for $10 more, you could have flown straight through to your destination! Your travel agent did exactly what you asked ... saved you the $10, but wouldn't you have preferred knowing your options so you could make an informed decision?

Just because there are lots of things that you won't have control over at your birth, it's still a good idea to learn about your options and to have a plan :)

I'll see you at the workshop, S. :)

All the best,

T.
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T. H., CD(DONA)
B*E*S*T Doula Service
http://www.bestdoulas.com
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I just skimmed the other responses. I had a birth plan for both my children's births. I don't think anyone read it the first time around, even though a copy was included in my chart. That birth went so differently than what I wanted or expected.

Even though I thought it was probably not worth the trouble, I had one the second time too. That time, the nurse in charge read it in front of me and all her actions the entire time I was in labor indicated that she was committed to me having the birth experience that I wanted. And I did.

So I think going in with the idea that "it can't hurt to have one" is exactly right. Write down what you want, but know that just because you have a plan doesn't mean that things will go the way you plan. So much about giving birth is out of your hands. The only thing that really matters is that you and your baby come out of the experience healthy.

Whatever you do, keep it simple - you don't want them to look at a 3 page essay and decide not to read it. We did one with 2 sections, during birth and after the birth. We phrased it nicely and firmly and kept it very simple.

Here's the text if you want some ideas:

Our goal is to have a natural, unmedicated birth. Therefore, please honor the following requests:
• We would like to use the room with the birthing tub if possible.
• We wish to be informed and consulted before any exam or intervention is performed on C. or our baby.
• Do not offer pain medication; we will request if needed.
• Please keep vaginal exams to a minimum.
• Please only monitor the baby intermittently, and remove the monitor to allow C. to move around freely.
• Please avoid interventions such as forceps, episiotomy, vacuum, pitocin, epidural or artificial rupture of membranes. If these become medically necessary, we are open to using them.
• Do not insert an IV for fluids unless C. becomes dehydrated. She will drink water and suck on ice to avoid this.
• Please allow natural pushing if possible.
• If delivery is without complication, Jeff would like to help catch the baby.
• We strongly wish to avoid a cesarean, and are willing to try other interventions first if they might help.

After our baby is born:
• Right away, place baby skin to skin on Christine’s stomach.
• Perform exam while C. is holding baby.
• Wait to cut the cord until it stops pulsing.
• C. will try to nurse right away; do not give the baby a bottle as we plan on breastfeeding exclusively.
• We wish to decline the eye drops since STDs are not a concern.
• Baby will room with C. for entire stay.
• Baby will not receive the Hepatitis B vaccine.
• Either Jeff or C. must be present if any test, treatment, exam, etc. is performed on our baby.

I may be in the minority here, but why would anyone even think about writing down a birth plan? Isn't everyones "plan" just to give birth?

I personally think it is a bit silly to think that you can plan every moment of your child birth. I don't know, maybe it has something to do with the fact that there seems to be alot of women who have a "need, or should I say, want" to control everything. I really think if you just relax and let nature take it's course you'll be pleasantly surprised. You can't live your whole life by a spread sheet.

Alot can happen during your delivery and your "plan" will more than likely not go as planned. I don't even remember alot of things when I was in delivery. So many things were happening at once, and the last thing I would want to do, is get out my piece of paper with my plans on it.

I think a better idea is to just talk to your husband about what you think you would like, but I bet you'll be surprised at what you weren't expecting, happening and you were ok with it.

I've had two deliveries and each one was completely different and there's no way a plan would have been followed through.
Perhaps a better plan would be to get your home and babies room all ready, because that, you DO have control over.

As far as the hospitals not allowing food, it's because they don't want you throwing up when you are in active labor. I just recently heard now that hospitals will let you eat, though. And the not walking around, from my understanding, you CAN walk around unless, you've had an epidural.

I say, just relax and have a happy delivery. In the end, plan or no plan, the result is the same...a BEAUTIFUL baby, no matter how he arrived! Good luck!

I did one and went over it with my doctor who was able to tell me ahead of time what was reasonable and what wasn't (some was hospital policy). My doula got one, and really helped us stick to it. We also had other copies for the nurses that were there during the delivery. It helped to keep us focused and know what our priorities were. Good luck.

Writing a birth plan is really silly, especially if you are going natural...and it is your first baby. Because when the REAL labor hits, you won't care if the lights are dim or the nurse is loud or the music is playing, etc..etc...I did a birth plan with my 1st...wrote it and gave it to the nurse. She grimaced when I handed to her. In fact, I think she sat it on the table in the room and never looked at it again. And, I didn't care. If you want classical music playing...then bring it and ask your husband to play it. The nurse is WAAAAYYY too busy to be helping you with your little plan...it should be something between you and the dad...I totally agree with KellyS. I have 3 children and neither of the deliveries were the same. I learned, my "plan" is to just bring home a healthy baby.

A birth plan is a great idea as long as you are not so set on it that it causes you problems. When you are in the middle of labor, it might be nice to refer to it so you remember what you thought about, but know that some things may not work out. For instance, I thought having my husband massage would be good - couldn't stand it. The third time I didn't have a plan and things were going so fast I couldn't even think, so it might have been helpful, just to remind me of things.

You can write it out to the "T" of how you want it to go down, but in reality it NEVER goes as planned. All you need to do is keep an open mind to the different possibilities of giving birth to your baby. The safest way is the best way, and usually isn't the way you had it planned out in your mind (or on paper)

Good Luck and Congrats!

I think that attending a class is a great idea. The class will give you lots of information so you can make some informed decissions. As far as a "birth plan", there are so many variables about what can happen that I wouldn't bother.

Write a birth plan and hire a doula. If you don't want a doula, make sure your husband is prepared to unwaveringly support you 100%. From what I understand, hospital staff can be pretty brutal toward laboring/new mothers.

I think it is a great way to get a clear idea on what is important to you. We had one and the staff and dr. did review it. I'd also talk to your doctor about the really important stuff. We did and he really worked with us throughout the process. I think going in to it knowing it all might look different once you get there is a good attitude, too. Good luck and enjoy the process!