Temper Tantrums During Diaper Changes

J.,

Diaper changing can be one of the most rewarding times you can have wih your child but it does take some work. Here are some helpful hints that have worked for me over the years:
Make sure to give your child time to finish whatever they are doing before taking them to change their diaper;
Always tell them what you are doing before you do it and give them time to process what you have said;
Try and involve them in as much of the process as possible so they have a vested interest in what is happening;
Avoid statemnts like let's hurray it just sends the message that this isn't something pleasant or enjoyable but something to be rushed through;
Finally try and think of it as a time where the two of you get to do something together instead of something that has to be done to her.
It takes time and these won't work right away but will work if you are consistent and respectful. Diapering quickly became one of my favorite activities once I learned to slow down and enjoy the one on one time I had but early on it was terribly difficult. Check out the book Dear Parents by Magda Gerber.

1 mom found this helpful

A technique I've used with my toddler has been changing her standing up in the bathroom sink. If any mess happens, then at least it would be in the sink and it would be simple to clean up. My daughter also likes looking at herself in the mirror, which made it easier to clean her up while she was distracted with that. Apparently, beginning to change diapers standing up in the bathroom is a segway towards potty training.

Hi J.,
I have seen this many times working in day care. One thing that I have tried and had success with is introducing a potty chair. When my oldest was the same age as your daughter and started doing the same thing, I bought her her own potty chair and kept it in the room with her at all times. When she would begin to fight about changing her diaper, I would ask her to sit for a few seconds (or minutes if you are lucky) and whether she succeeded or not, she got a reward for sitting. I started with stickers or hand stamps for sitting...and gradually as she began to start using the potty, she began to get bigger and bigger rewards. We used one m&m when she started peeing on the potty and she would get 4 or 5 if she had a BM in it (although this did not happen for a long time, we would talk about it).

Fighting diaper changes is a normal thing for children this age. They are starting to realize that they feel better with the diaper off, and it is the first step in beginning potty training. I hope this helps, even if just a little!

I feel your pain! My daughter did this for a short while and it was tolerable. My son has been doing it for months and it is like wrestling and alligator...it is exhuasting! If only you could ignore diaper changes like you do tantrums! Not possible of course. I tried everything and the only thing, I mean the only thing that worked for me was changing him in front of television with the Disney channel on. Toys just ended up in poop. Singing songs lasted two seconds. He lost interest in anything except the television. He was always just too busy to stop for a diaper change. Good luck. i know how difficult and challenging this can be.

i feel your pain. my 16 month old does the same exact thing and has been for a month or two now. same goes for when i try getting him dressed in the morning. i have tried all the same things as you. i have found singing and playing games to be the most effective, like peek-a-boo or show me your nose, that sort of thing. BUT, it's still not a perfect situation at all. I'd love to hear from you if you get any great responses that you find are effective! good luck!

Hi J.
I had the same problem with my little boy once he started to walk.It's just that life is so interesting now, they don't want to be kept down for a minute! It is a phase and it will get better.But it's really hard, I thought I was actually going to hurt him trying to pin him down! He does it occasionally now, and I play a game tickling his feet and pretending to bite/eat them. It seems to work. Good luck!
S.

I totally agree about introducing the potty chair, and also teaching her a sign for when she's peeing so she can tell you throughout the day when she's going, it just makes her more aware of her body. Also, if the potty chair isn't working after a month or so...I would let my son play for 5 or 10 minutes after he got up before that first diaper change and it really seemed to make a difference in the mornings. Good luck!

Try putting the diapers/wipes where she can get them herself. Ours would get all of the stuff and lay on the floor waiting for us. Otherwise, pop her little butt cheek, look her in the eyes and in your best command voice (deep & stern) say "No ma'am". She is to young to be running the show.

I agree with Donna G. When my daughter started fighting diaper changes my husband would raise his arm and pop her on the butt. After a couple times of that he would only have to raise his arm and she'd stop. You should not be accommodating her. She should understand that certain behaviors are unacceptable and that there will be consequences for behaving like that.

Try the small sized pull-ups so she can stay on her feet. It worked well with my daughter and now she will allow diaper changes again. Good luck!

J.,
When my daughter was that age I could distract her by giving her stickers to play with while I changed her diaper. If I didn't have stickers then a small piece of scotch tape worked too. The stickers worked best though. My daughter is 22 months now and is starting to fight diaper changes again but I get her to cooperate by telling her we have to change her diaper so her bottom won't get red. That seems to work for now. But, try the stickers, that worked wonders for me when my daughter was 16 months. Best of luck!

If you don't have objections to your child watching a little television, I found that changing my son in front of a little Baby Einstein or Teletubbies worked wonders. Once I discovered that, I wondered why I hadn't thought of it sooner. Now I always do diaper changes on our bed in front of the TV.

My son enjoys music. I bought these Winnie the Pooh wall postings (Burlington Coat Factory) in which Eeyore plays music when you push a button. I make a habit to tell him that he's getting his diaper change so he knows. I also let him help in getting a diaper. He brings me a diaper, I put him on the table, he pushes the button ( but I have to keep pushing it b/c the melody only plays for a few seconds) then I'm able to change his diaper. Hope this helps.

Yeah, my son has always done this since he was a year old. We went to pullups so I could change him while he was standing up playing (or sometimes chase him while he is running). Now at 2 1/2, he is fighting again and we are introducing the potty again. Good luck, but try some pullups, huggies has a kind that open and close like a diaper in case of big poop messes.