so...question Of All Moms...

I know waiting is hard, especially when you are young. This is just the first in a life-time of sacrifices you will have to make for your child...you have to do what's best for the baby 1st, last, and always. Since you haven't met this precious little one yet, it's hard to make the necessary sacrifice to make sure he arrives healthy. Just trust the moms who have given their advice, and believe me, no one is trying to judge you because we've all been at the place where we are about to crack. We're here for you--hang in there...this too shall pass.

You didnt mention anything of insurance, or money issues, but NICU is sooo expensive. Thousands of dollars a day in some cases. At 34 weeks you are looking at between 2-4 weeks in NICU, including coming home without your baby.

My first was delivered at 36 weeks because of preclamsia. She had/has jaundice, astham and a kidney problem. She also had her first ear infection at 1 month and we had to stop breast feeding. Was this because she was preterm, we will never know for sure. I am thankful that she and I are both here after a difficult delivery and post term infection. Even at 36 weeks and 7lbs 4 oz she spent two days in NICU.

My second was full term at 8 lbs 11 oz. I was miserable. My body was not meant to carry something that big. I was on my OB's floor begging him to take her at 38 weeks. His answer was if she wants here at 38 weeks, then so be it, but I dont want her here until 40 weeks. She has had many less problems. Chronic Ear infections, just like me when I was little, but not many "cold" and high fever infections like my first. Again, is this because she "coooked" longer, who knows? But it is what it is.

Hang in there. There will come a day when you long to be pregnant again. There will come a day when he is so fussy and you are so tired, you will wish he was still inside. You are on the home stretch, keep your eye on the prize of a healthy baby boy and a year from now, you will be glad you did.

P.

I know from my own experience how challenging an at-risk pregnancy can be! I would encourage you to keep your ob-gyn up on how you are feeling about handling this and ask for their frank opinion. I can tell you that my son was 7 weeks early and my daughter 12 weeks. Both are currently 10, and 7 and doing wonderfully, but we really had some early rough patches with my daughter (and almost lost her more than once). If you can hang on, it really is so much better for the baby to have the extra time. Ask about steroid shots to help the baby's lungs develop in case you do need to deliver early. Take good care of yourself, and let your loved ones coddle you-I hope you are blessed with a wonderfully strong and healthy baby!

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE fight to take this baby to term!!!! I went through the same thing a year ago, and we got to 37 weeks, thank God! The problems that you can have with your baby being that early are severe, and could effect him for the rest of his life. As far as finances are concerned, the NICU and all other healthcare costs are SUPER HIGH for preemies! Even with my condition as bad as it was a year ago, my doctor was insistent upon trying to get to 37 weeks...only then is lung development complete. Don't risk the health of your baby because of emotions that you're experiencing from going through the torture of bedrest (trust me, I understand that torture). I know that you just want to be done, but you will never forgive yourself for not fighting for him till the very end...as long as you can. PUSH ON, and good luck!

My first pregnancy, I didn't have preterm labor issues, but I had sooo many other problems. All of my friends had such cute, healthy pregnancies too, while I was constantly sick with severe pains, extreme vomitting (yes, all 9 months), severe carpal tunnel from the swelling, and gestational diabetes.

I sooo wanted my baby to be early too! But, he was 4 days over due.

My sister, who did have a normal, healthy pregnancy,, had her son 1 month early, and her going to NICU, sometimes waiting days or hours to see him struggling to survive, hooked up to machines with a breathing tube was just terrible. (he's okay now by the way). She wasn't even allowed to hold him for quite a while.

Premies typically have a much harder time sleeping, eating, developing on schedule with other children their same age, and can have other medical problems.

I know it's hard! Hang in there as long as you can. Every week of your pregnancy counts as your baby progresses each week. Once the pregnancy is over, I promise, your body will return back to normal and you will forget the as much pain you were in. So you will want to stay in as long as possible for the health and safety of your baby, who may have to pay the consequences if you decide to decline the procardia. You can do it, just try to hold out for another couple of weeks (shoot for 37) if you can.

You obviously haven't been in a NICU. My son was born early and we spent a great deal of time in Harris downtown's NICU. While I don't think that there is a better place for a baby to grow, it is depressing. I was much older than you with my first, and it is possible that my life experiences made it worse. I had been to the hospital countless times to visit friends who had a beautiful pink baby in their room - trying on baby clothes - planning their lives. Moms who have babies in the NICU are put on a different floor and it is depressing. I spent every moment - for almost a year - wondering what I did wrong. Still to this day - I blame myself for any problem that he has - why couldn't I have kept him in longer? I didn't have the option to keep him in - it was an emergency situation, but I promise you - after a few hours in the NICU, you will regret not doing anything you can to keep this child in you.

I am sorry to be so blunt, but it's not like you have another child to take care of, and it sounds as if you are being taken care of by others, so there is no valid reason to have this baby at 31 weeks. To do so because you are tired of being pregnant would be incredibly selfish and a really bad start to parenthood. Good luck to you and your baby - I wish you nothing but the best.

After having had SOME experience with preterm labor myself, as well as watching a close friend of mine go through it, if you can at least hold out for 3 more weeks, that would make a huge difference in the health of your baby. 34 weeks is a big milestone in pregnancy. Making at least 37 weeks is considered 'full-term' in a normal pregnancy, but 34 weeks is huge is far as lung development. 31 weeks is too early. Chances are your baby will survive, but will spend weeks in the hospital in the NICU. I understand your strain, but long-term I feel you would need to be willing to make it to at least 34 or preferably 37 weeks.

Also, I had problems with preterm labor and had to have medication and go to the hospital a few times. I wasn't on full bedrest but was put on very restricted activity (very difficult for me with a 2-year-old and NO family anywhere near here to help me), and guess what! Even after all of that, I still had to be induced 5 days PAST my due date! So, it was rough and every day I just wanted my daughter to hurry up and be born, but it was so worth the wait when she was born and was full-term, healthy, and happy.

C.,
I do understand what you are going through as I had severe complications and was pumped with all kinds of meds that made me feel horrible. With that being said, as hard as it is, it is your job as mom to protect this baby boy. If anything was wrong with him because you didn't let them stop your labor you would never be able to forgive yourself. It is not worth the risk. As hard as it is, you really need to sacrifce for the baby right now. Your discomfort and pain is not worth having a baby in the NICU with tubes all over him, needles sticking in his head, etc. Sorry to be so graphic, but that is how it could be. Try to wait until 36 weeks. 31 weeks is way too early for him to come. If there is anything you can do to prevent labor, do it. Stay on bedrest, go to your appointments, and take your meds as prescribed. This is one of many tests of motherhood and each one will make you stronger and a better mom. Hang in there. I know you can do it and you will be so glad you did when you deliver a healthy baby boy. Best Wishes.

I would do all I could to keep him in there as long as possible. Especially if you plan to breastfeed because preterm babies sometimes have a hard time latching on well. Breastfeeding is challenging, but it is a gift that lasts a lifetime and I would do everything to make sure that you have as few obsticles as possible.
I say if a women can survive the last month of pregnancy she can endure almost anything. I have had two babies and the last 2 months on both were aweful, but the last two weeks I literally thought I wouldn't made it. Trust me, this is the first of many trials you will face as a mother. Just get as much rest as you can becasue those sleepless nights will be here in no time!

just FYI, I would join a moms group. I wish I had on my first. It makes a world of difference!
I am part of MOPS (Mothers of Pre Schoolers) you can find one near you by going to the web page. http://www.mops.org/
i will pray for little calin and you as well.
all the best, liz