Son Still Sleeps with Me

My daughter did the same thing, and I just had to take her back to bed. No matter how many times a night and what time. Every time she came in I took her right back. It took about 2 weeks to get her sleeping in her bed "full-time". Good Luck :)

Hi S.
I am having the same problem with my son (age 4) and daughter (age 2 1/2)and what my husband and I have started doing is tucking them in bed and let them fall asleep on their own. If they get up then we just put them back in their bed and cover them up. So far since we started this 4 nights ago my daughter hasn't gotten out of her bed once and my son usually has to be put back in his bed 2 times throughout the night. you'll be a little tired at first but so far it's worth it. I'm told that after a week or 2 my kids should sleep thru the night without getting up.

Hope this helps.
K.

We have had this issue crop up with our (barely) 5-yr old. We got him a spiderman sleeping bag and when he wants to sleep with us, we put him in his sleeping bag on the floor next to our bed. It was a struggle at first, but gradually got better. After a few consecutive days of sleeping on the floor, he was ready to go back to his bunk beds :)

~ M. C

My son did the same thing with me. Just keep trying. Everytime you notice him crawling into your bed, just keep picking him up and going right back to his room. I also never had a conversation with my son in the middle of the night. I would just pick him up, go to his room. Lay down beside him for about 5 minutes and I would go back to bed. If he followed me I would do it again. It only took a few days and he just stopped. My son was also 4 at the time.
Good Luck!

I know many many people will tell you that you have to stop this immediately. But think about this: Can you imagine him still wanting to sleep next to you when he is 17? Doubtful. God made moms for children to help them feel safe and secure, until they are old enough to trust in God to take care of them. Keep encouraging him to sleep on his own, but don't force it. Imagine how you felt when you were little, and remember that he wants his mommy, and that's ok. As long as he has a strong, healthy male in his life, who loves him too, he should be fine. At about age 5 or 6 he needs to spend more time with the male (father) figure, so he can transfer his identity properly, identifying with the male instead of the female. I have a 10 year old son who only stopped sleeping with me when he was 6, and at that time, he "switched" to dad...which helped him gain a masculine sense of who he was.
With love, K.

Put a toddler bed in your room. Start out next to your bed and move it gradually over and out the door! Worked great with my leach!!!
J.

When our son was about 3, we would put him in his own bed everynight. About 2a.m. he would be wanting to crawl into bed with us. Our doctor at the time suggested that we put another mattress on the floor of our bedroom, and whenever he came into the room, we should have him sleep on that mattress. He said that he would probably break himself of the habit eventually, but it would be easier for him to not be used to sleeping with anyone. We took his advice, and placed a mattress at the foot of our bed. We told him that when he came into our room to sleep, that's where he would be sleeping. He took it with no fussing, and came into our room every night for a couple of years, got into his "own" bed and slept. It took a long time, but it was not difficult and everyone was much less tired.

Hi S., my 5 yr. old son does the same thing. Sometimes I think it's because he had a bad dream or that he's cold and not waking up enough to cover up again. Whatever the reason, half of the time I don't even wake up enough to put up much of a protest and I don't mind except when he sleeps with his feet all over me, then I can't sleep. The only thing that has worked for me in the past is to get back up with the child and put them back in bed and stay with them till they fall asleep. This works pretty good when I'm consistent, it takes like 3-4 nights of this at least. I think my son does this when things wake him up(bad dream, cold, have to go potty, etc.) and then his sleep pattern gets mixed up and the only thing that makes him feel better is mommy. They eventually grow out of it, my oldest is 19 and he's a "flopper" and I survived him, sleepily I might add. :)
I am more concerned about you and your back problem, you might need some physical therapy and such to get back on track. Please take care of yourself, I was a single mom for 13 years of two kids and now am a married mom of 6. Taking care of yourself is the greatest and HARDEST and MOST necessary thing to do. If your son isn't causing you to loose sleep, I'd just let him sleep with you. Hope this makes you feel better, Good Luck with the schooling, Good Job!!!!
M.

You just need to be stearn with him and tell him he is a big boy and he needs to sleep in his own bed. The first time he goes to sleep with you walk him back to his room and tell him you need to sleep in your bed put him back to bed tell him mommy loves you,kiss him, and say your such a big boy. SEcond time do the same thing, third time just walk him back to his room and put him back to bed and kiss him and say mommy loves you nite. Keep doing it if he gets out but dont say anything just tuck him in and say mommy loves you and walk out. He will get the idea eventually.

Good Luck

We had this problem with both of our kids, when we did get them into their bed to sleep they were in our bed by morning. They only way we found to get them to stop coming in with us was a tv, they were use to sound ALL the time. If we leave the tv on all night they would stay all night and when we put them to bed they would be asleep by 9pm and sleep 12 hours. But they had to have noise. I don't know if this will work with your son but I would think it is worth a shot. And not that you prob want to hear this to this day they still need the noise and they are 9 and 11.

T.

Sounds like you are a really busy mom! Doing it on your own only allows you to do so much in one day. I'm not there to see the situation but your son may just be looking for more attention and security. Both my boys love to sleep with us. The only way we were able to get them out of our bed was to get a bed that excited them. My first son, we got a car bed, which really excited him, it wasn't immediate that he quit sleeping with us. I had to hold and cuddle him more during the day. My second son slept with us till we got bunkbeds for the boys. He was really excited about sleeping with his big brother. But during the night I would have to go lay with him for a while till he was completely "wheened" from sleeping with us. We still let them crawl in after we all wake up in the morning right before we get up for the day. We didn't want them to feel completely excluded from our room. It's very important for them to be able to crawl in and feel safe and loved for a little while. Every kid is different, when I was a baby, I did not want to be rocked or cuddled, I just wanted my mom to put me in bed and leave me alone. My children are VERY opposite of that:o)

Good Luck! I hope this helped
S.

The first thing I would suggest is to go to the doctor and have your back checked out. If you can't lay flat, that definitely sounds like it needs to be looked at. After that, I would advise being an example for your son and sleep in your bed to show him that he needs to sleep in his bed. What you can start off doing is maybe moving his bed into your room next to your bed and suggest that he sleep in his own bed, but he can sleep in your room. Also, it may help to give him a favorite stuffed animal to hold with him in bed every night. He may just be looking for some security. And just remember that if the worse problem you have is that your son likes sleeping with you because he loves you so much, then you're a very lucky lady! Don't worry. He will eventually outgrow this stage, and you may even find that you will miss it later. Good luck!

My 3 year old is the exact same way. We need to be more consistent with putting him back in his bed. We try it and then 20-30 min later he is in our bed again. It drives me crazy and I can't wait to have my bed back!

Every time he comes to sleep with you take him back to his own bed. That means each and every time with NO exceptions just put him back in his own bed. Don't discuss it just keep everything quiet and low key (it's sleep time). It will make for a few very disrupted nights. But it will work. How long it takes depends on how stubborn he is. You just have to be a little more stubborn.
I'm sure that as a single mom of four and a student the thought of losing any sleep is probably overwhelming. It is worth doing to improve the quality of your sleep and his. If you can do it over a break in your classes or just bite the bullet. Once you decide to do this be VERY consistant or it will take much longer and he will expect you to give up and give in. Good Luck!
I am a mom of 10 and grandma of 7(almost 8). I had 5 kids when I graduated from college. I understand tired!
After I posted this I realized it is posted under my daughter's name. She must have logged in on my computer. Oops. Martie

We had big problems with this when my daughter was 3. What worked best for us is just making a bed on the floor wherever you are sleeping. We actually eventually bought a little blow up mattress with spongebob on it. We made it kind of a game. She could touch my hand, but could not get in the bed. We did this for probably an entire year before we moved it into her room for a campout and stayed there. I know this alleviated the screaming from the other room etc. Just be consistant about him staying on the floor. He has a choice, be in his room, or be in your room on the floor. SuperNanny would not agree with this at all, but it worked for us. My daughter has slept in her own bed since she was 4.

Just so you know, you are not alone with this problem. My son is 3 and he too will wake up and join me no matter where ever that maybe. I even slept in his bed with him trying to get him ued to that bed for about 6 months, that didn't work either. I'm sorry I can't be of help but, it's always nice to see that you're not alone. Good luck and I hope that someone answers this question that actually has kids and gives us advice from experiance and not someone who is just going to get the answer out of a book! You can't go by books! Kids are not the same! Good luck!

I know this might sound silly but Nanny 911 has really taught me a lot of things. She has a book out and it is great. You must stay consistent. When your son comes to you in the a.m. you have to take him back to bed. He will eventually get it. Just simply say to him he is a big boy and he needs to sleep in his own bed now. Most of the time it is the parent that has the hardest time with letting go. I know I did. Once I got into a routine with my daughter she had no problem sleeping in her own bed.