Sleeping on Her Own

I know that it is so hard to listen to them cry at night. I hated doing it myself. But it truly works. You just can't give in. If she cries for 45 minutes and then you go get her, she'll cry a little longer the next time, because she knows mommy's going to come and get her sooner or later. You have to stick it out. It's tough, but it works. Let her cry until she wears herself out! If it takes 2 hours, hang in there. A friend of mine couldn't stand the crying, so she would plug up the vaccum cleaner outside of her little boys room. Not only did that make it to where she didn't have to hear her son scream, but it seemed to help him go to sleep faster. I Know I can't sleep if it's silent. I sleep with a box fan in my room because the noise is soothing. I wouldn't recommend putting a fan in there because the air isn't good for a baby, but the vaccum...might be an idea. You can keep the baby monitor next to you, and turn it on every now and then. I would think that it's worth a shot. I would have tried it if necessary with my son. Anyway, try to noise thing if it's too hard to listen to her cry. It might help. Good luck!!!

Since my hubs is in Iraq I didn't think twice about letting our daughter (#3) sleep with me. Until was due home for R&R...Well. I can't take the crying. So I had to figure something else out. I was very sleep deprived.. for a week I woke up with her five and six times a night. She would wake up as soon as I put her down. So I would get up with her and put her back to sleep. Over and over. All night. But seven days of this was enough. Now she sleeps in her own crib (a foot away). :)

I just recently dealt with this issue and when I say recently, I mean I am just getting this issue resolved with my 16 month old son. My son took many of his naps on me but I was always determined to make him sleep in his own bed so at night I would put him in his crib - usually after rocking or nursing him to sleep. However, he would wake in the middle of the night (usually more than once) and after being extremely sleep deprived I started bringing him into bed with my husband and me. So he began to want to sleep there all the time - as would be expected. Naps got worse and his night time sleeping got worse. My husband and I tried several other methods first because we just didn't agree with the crying it out method. However, this is exactly what we ended up doing. I'm telling you now, it works. We made sure his night time routine was consistent - bath, pjs, book, sleep. We just put him in his crib, told him goodnight and left the room. The first night he cried for an hour and half. The second night, 20 minutes. Today is day four. His naps are better and I didn't have to get out of my bed once last night. He fusses a little at night but I just let him figure it out and he eventually drifts off back to sleep. I have been kicking myself for not doing this sooner because the older they get the harder it is - on them and my husband, son and I are already sleeping so much better. You have to know that she's fine. It's not hurting her. Of course, she'll be mad during the process but she'll learn. Your daughter will be much happier and so will you once you get this issue resolved. Just make sure her routine is very consistent so she knows what's coming. Make sure she is fed, dry and has whatever else she might need - a blanket, a stuffed animal, a pacifier. Put her in her crib and tell her goodnight. If you go in to check on her, don't talk to her - this only arouses her further. Don't pick her up and if she can stand up in the crib, just lay her back down and tuck her back in and leave the room. I promise this works if you can just tough it out.

I know it's a long response, but I wanted you to know my story so you could understand. GOOD LUCK!

My daughter is 3 1/2 years old now. When she was your daughters age, I usually was able to get her to sleep in her swing on her own. And when I would rock her to sleep, after she was asleep for 10 minutes she would usually stay asleep until I woke her back up. She sometimes would wake back up, but if I put her down anyway and rubbed her back it seemed to help her fall quickly back to sleep. Hope this advice helps.

I'm going through the same thing with my daughter. She's 10 months old now. I've found that making a little padded spot on the floor for her helps quite a bit...for naps anyway. I'll put a couple of blankets down, a pillow, some stuffed animals, and then her. I have to lay down with her until she goes to sleep, but once she does she's good for a couple of hours.

Hi H.,

I also think that you need to try the "cry it out method." However there is a kinder way that worked for me. My pediatrician gave me a video by a sleep specialist/pediatrician and it is called "Your Baby Can Sleep" by Dr. Stuart Tomares. You can purchase the video on Ebay if your interested but give this a try and see what happens. Here is a link if you're interested in the video http://cgi.ebay.com/YOUR-BABY-CAN-SLEEP-RELIEF-FOR-EXHAUS...

You may need to copy and paste in your browser if this link does not work. Basically what you need to do is establish a good and consistent night time & nap time routine as mentioned by a previous mother. This is a very important part of nap/bedtime ritual and I am sure you are aware that children do best with consistent rountines.
Start 30-60 minutes before you want baby to sleep. Turn down the TV and lights and get your baby in the mood for sleep. Maybe you want to play quietly but it is important to keep bright lights and loud noises to a minimum. For nap time play quietly and read a book. For bed time a bath and book may work good too.
Since your baby has not spent much time in her crib she will cry until she gets used to her surrondings. Put your baby down without any assistance ie. music, mobiles. If she has these when she goes to sleep she will expect them when she wakes. Provide an environment that will be exsactly the same when she wakes. A night light is all she should need.
I know that you think co-sleeping is best but after about age 3 mo it really isn't best. You need to teach your daughter how to sleep on her own. This will benefit her in the future and make her a good sleeper. Many adults have sleep problems that stem from infancy. Beleive me....you truly both will sleep better.
After you have done the routine put her in her crib still awake but groggy. Leave the room. The first day you can go into her room on this schedule after crying lasts for 2 minutes go in and reassure her everything is okay but do not touch her or pick her up. Simply open the door and tell her to go to sleep everything is okay. If she continues to cry go in after 4 minutes, 8 minutes, 15 minutes and every 15 minutes until she falls asleep. It will be hard to hear her cry and not pick her up or touch her so expect to feel uneasy.
My son cried the first night only up to the 8 minutes mark but it felt like an eternity. You increase the time for up to 7 days. It goes like this 2nd night 3, 6, 12, 20 min., 3rd 4, 8, 16, 22 min etc.
This really does work. It makes them feel secure and prevent them from crying for hours on end. I think it would be wise to invest in the video because he gives many pointers that I needed to reference back to that I cannot put in this email.
I really hope you try this cry it out method before others because although it does not hurt them to cry in their cribs it is very hard emotionally for both or you. Your daughter is old enough now to self sooth and should be able to do this relativly easy.
I think you will look back on this time a think why didn't I do this earlier? If you are not ready to break the co sleeping yet then try putting her in a swing for some short naps. Co sleeping is hard to let go because it is comforting for you to have her close but once you stop you will realize how much better you both sleep on your own.
Let me know how it works if you try it. Best of luck and sorry for rambaling but this is a huge issue for all moms.
E.

I don't agree with Crying it out at all so for other resources check out www.askdrsears.com. He has some great ideas on sleep. For naps I lay down with my little guy till he falls asleep then sneak away. Works for both of us!