Hi all. I am a first –time mom, now single and raising a 2 ½ year old daughter that I adore. I have read some really great articles and Q&A’s on here that helped me a lot so I thought I’d see if anyone can offer advice on my situation. My little one refuses to put the blanket on herself. At bedtime she lays down in her bed and I put her blanket on her, we say our prayers, kiss her goodnight and leave the room. She will wake up anywhere between 3 times to every hour calling for me to come and put her blanket on her. I’ve tried showing her how to do it and she just gets mad because she can’t do it exactly like I do or because she wants to lay on her stomach and she can’t do it that way. I’ve put her in warmer clothes, tucked her blanket in (which she normally kicks out of) put a couple of different blankets in her bed so they are all around and available and we are still having this issue. When she calls I ask her to try for herself first and she just says no so I end up doing it. On friends advice I ask her to do it herself and then let her cry hoping she’ll at least try. Nope, she’ll just cry and scream louder and it’s very hard for me to hear that and makes me feel bad. After ½ hour of crying I’m just done, feel terrible and end up doing it again. I don’t mean to sound like I’m complaining because she is my baby and I’m happy she loves and needs me but sometimes it makes it really hard because I’ll end up going through and entire night without ever having the opportunity to get into a deep sleep and it’s hard to work and function like that. Is there hope this will work itself out soon?
Thank you all for the great suggestions. We are working on trying each one!
My 2-year-old wakes up screaming almost each night. Usually it's for me to take her potty. Or, it's because her blankie fell off. I think she's cold and wakes screaming; I don't think she cares too much about the blankie itself. My 4-year-old, though, comes to my room and bugs me that his blankie is not on right! This happens a few times a month, though.
So, I don't have any suggestions other than to say we are there with you!
She wants your attention as well as the blanket, it takes 3 things for her and one for you.
For her 1- a toddler sleeping bag that you either put in her crib or bed, perferable one that she gets to pick out.
2-a blanket small blanket that you just tuck down inside for her to cuddle with( curl up with it when you read her a story so she associates the blanket with you and comforting)
3 a light on a timer that goes on when it is ok for her to call for you, when it off she needs to lay back down and wait for it to go on
For you headphones or ear plugs for the first few nights for her to get the routine down.
Three kids and two grandkids have taught me alot-this worked for us, the one thing is you have to nip behavior habits quickly so they become major problems later.
Forget the blanket, get her a sleepsack (Halo is one brand). They are great!! My son was in one until almost 3!! It zips up the front, is sleeveless & covers their feet...just like a sack. I would overnight one or get one from Babies R Us (if you have one in TX) & stop the regular blanket immediately.
My son is going through this EXACT thing!! We tried toddler sheets thinking that would help,but it kept untucking. I ended up putting a twin sideways and tucking in and it couldn't get out. Then his blanket is put on top of this and he can't feel if it comes off. Lately though, I get the constant, "cover me" request and I am beginning to think that he just wants me in there. We started a bad habit and just last night decided to let him cry it out. It is so hard to hear, but I can't go in and out all night, and he needs to sleep too. Even though he may wake up his sister the next few nights, I think it is better than the incessant requests that were going on for 2 weeks or so.
It's the weekend, so try telling her that you "just can't do it anymore", and you're "very sorry". Then, DON'T do it. You're letting your guilt about being "now single" get the best of you. You don't want the tail wagging the dog here. You have to make rules, and you have to see that she obeys them, or you're in for a very rough ride. Kids know how and when to push your buttons to get what they want, and that's exactly what she's doing. It will only take a couple of days to break this habit, provided you don't give in after a half hour. Good luck.
My son was a bit older, but he eventually quit waking me at night because I would take him back to his own bed then leave after a few minutes for my own bed. So he just come to our bedroom in the middle of the night and tuck himself in at the foot of our bed. I'd wake up in the morning and he'd be sound asleep holding my foot. They go through a stage where they just don't want to be alone.
Do you think it is really about the blanket or is she kickingit off so you will come in? Also-maybe try making her bed up like a real bed with a sheet/blanket tucked in around the sides of the bed. I can't remember what age you can do this.
What if you just put several blankets around in her bed, and she can grab any one of those and put it on her.
Toddlers can be real persnickety... and yes, she probably does not have the fine-motor skills yet... to put it on herself... exactly like she wants it or is thinking. Toddlers at this age, OFTEN cannot yet do... what they have in their heads... because their mental "ideals" do NOT match, their fine-motor or gross-motor skills and ability yet. That is why the get frustrated.
Imagine... if you wanted to paint flowers on a canvas. You watched a TV show about it and 'knew' mentally how to do it... but could you ACTUALLY do it... AND JUST LIKE the Artist on the TV show??? Probably not. Thus, like a Toddler.
Or, explain to her that she can only call you ONE time during the night. That you need sleep too... and a tired Mommy is a grumpy tired Mommy... and you BOTH need rest. That even your blankets sometimes comes off during the night, but oh well. You can STILL sleep fine....
Put a paper on her wall... each time she calls you, mark off a BIG tally mark. The number "1". Then tell her... that's it.
And put about 2 or 3 blankets in there for her.. .and she can use either one.
My son, is recently made 4 years old... he still needs occasional help with putting on his blanket JUST so. But more often than not... he prefers NO blankets on him.
all the best, it must be exasperating!
Susan
